River vs Buffy

POSTED BY: Fredikayllow
UPDATED: Monday, March 29, 2010 19:04
VIEWED: 43050
PAGE 1 of 1

FREDIKAYLLOW

Sunday, November 6, 2005 9:43 AM

Okay, i don't know if I'm posting this in the right place, or if this has been done before, but i wanted to know what you think:

River and Buffy get into a fight.
No weapons- only bare hands.
Who would win??

No Power In The 'Verse Can Stop Me

11THHOUR

Sunday, November 6, 2005 9:54 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Fredikayllow:
Okay, i don't know if I'm posting this in the right place, or if this has been done before, but i wanted to know what you think:

River and Buffy get into a fight.
No weapons- only bare hands.
Who would win??

Cage match? Is there mud involved?

Interesting question. Joss has made them both so awesomely kick-ass that I fear they'd both get the livin' heck beat out of them.

There's also the extra bonus in River's favor with that "I can kill you with my brain" ability. That could come in very handy when kicking someone in the head just isn't working fast enough.

Actually, I'd like to see them both fighting together against a pack of Reaver-Vamps. Two Joss universes together!

11th Hour

________________________________________________

"Because teenage pranks are fun when you're about to die!" - Hoban Washburne

PHOEBE

Sunday, November 6, 2005 1:09 PM

River tops Buffy on everything except strength, I'd say. Which means she can just outmaneouver Buffy so Buffy doesn't have chance to get the drop on her.

PHOEBE

Sunday, November 6, 2005 1:10 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by 11thHour:
Quote:
Originally posted by Fredikayllow:
Okay, i don't know if I'm posting this in the right place, or if this has been done before, but i wanted to know what you think:

River and Buffy get into a fight.
No weapons- only bare hands.
Who would win??

Cage match? Is there mud involved?

Interesting question. Joss has made them both so awesomely kick-ass that I fear they'd both get the livin' heck beat out of them.

There's also the extra bonus in River's favor with that "I can kill you with my brain" ability. That could come in very handy when kicking someone in the head just isn't working fast enough.

Actually, I'd like to see them both fighting together against a pack of Reaver-Vamps. Two Joss universes together!

11th Hour

________________________________________________

"Because teenage pranks are fun when you're about to die!" - Hoban Washburne

Reavamps!

JOSSISAGOD

Monday, November 7, 2005 5:16 PM

Buffy's strong but River is faster and a better fighter. River is also more purposeful in her movements, as well as the whole "I can kill you with my brain," thing mentioned by 11thhour. I believe River would wipe the floor with Buffy.

MIRAND

Monday, November 7, 2005 7:20 PM

Besides her exceptional intelligence and maybe training River is in other aspects just a "normal" human with human vulnerabilities.

Buffy on the other hand has superhuman strength and resistances. Also some intelligence.

If River has no tools to translate her inteligence in something lethal she has just the option to beat the hell out of Buffe without getting hit.
After some minutes her stamina would end this. After all Buffy just needs a single hit to kill her.

SUICIDALDUCKLING

Monday, November 7, 2005 7:21 PM

I would give the edge to Buffy. Buffy's got super powers while River doesn't, other than her psychic abilities. Those psychic abilities will help make up for her lack of super abilities, but Buffy would eventually wear her down. The right environment however may swing things in River's favor. Ahhhh, this reminds of the Great Caveman vs Astronaut Debate of 2004.

SUICIDALDUCKLING

Monday, November 7, 2005 7:22 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by SuicidalDuckling:
I would give the edge to Buffy. Buffy's got super powers while River doesn't, other than her psychic abilities. Those psychic abilities will help make up for her lack of super abilities, but Buffy would eventually wear her down. The right environment however may swing things in River's favor. Ahhhh, this reminds of the Great Caveman vs Astronaut Debate of 2004.

In other words, what Mirand just said.

PHOEBE

Monday, November 7, 2005 8:01 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by SuicidalDuckling:
I would give the edge to Buffy. Buffy's got super powers while River doesn't, other than her psychic abilities. Those psychic abilities will help make up for her lack of super abilities, but Buffy would eventually wear her down. The right environment however may swing things in River's favor. Ahhhh, this reminds of the Great Caveman vs Astronaut Debate of 2004.

Intelligent, telepathy, and enhanced physical abilities. She may not have super strength and enhanced healing ability but I'd say her fight with the reavers shows that she has a fair amount of stamina - or could you do that?

SUICIDALDUCKLING

Monday, November 7, 2005 8:56 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Phoebe:
Quote:
Originally posted by SuicidalDuckling:
I would give the edge to Buffy. Buffy's got super powers while River doesn't, other than her psychic abilities. Those psychic abilities will help make up for her lack of super abilities, but Buffy would eventually wear her down. The right environment however may swing things in River's favor. Ahhhh, this reminds of the Great Caveman vs Astronaut Debate of 2004.

Intelligent, telepathy, and enhanced physical abilities. She may not have super strength and enhanced healing ability but I'd say her fight with the reavers shows that she has a fair amount of stamina - or could you do that?

Never said i could do that. River is what i would call a peak athlete. She's been trained to the limit of human abilities, but she's still human. Buffy has the power of demons in her blood. River, and the reavers for that matter, cannot compare. Give River a gun or have them fight in a deserted building, where intelligence (and psychic ability) are more useful, then River would win, but Buffy would make it challenging for her. Throw them in an empty room with nothing but their bare hands and Buffy will eventually win.

HOBANIWASHBURNE

Wednesday, November 9, 2005 6:10 AM

These are all making for a very interesting read. I have to admit... Despite Buffy's great powers.... River would come out ahead.

Of course, Buffy has one ability that no one in the Serenity 'verse seems to have in common with the Angel/Buff camp: Coming back from the dead.

Buffy could come back and back and back to get River until she finally won. :D

"Tis the season for the fireplace. Fa la la la la. La la. La la.

GIANTEVILHEAD

Wednesday, November 9, 2005 6:19 AM

River's smart enough to bring a gun to the fight.

"I swallowed a bug." -River Tam

HOBANIWASHBURNE

Wednesday, November 9, 2005 6:27 AM

Heheee. True. She would bring a gun... but would she run out of bullets if Buffy kept springing up alive again? :: grinz in silliness ::

"Therapy is expensive. Bubble wrap is cheap. The choice is yours."

3HEADEDMONKEY

Wednesday, November 9, 2005 6:32 AM

catfight with 2 hot chicks. who would win?

the fans. :D

JOSSISAGOD

Wednesday, November 9, 2005 4:53 PM

the only reason Buffy would keep getting back up would be if she had Zander or Willow on the side-lines waiting for her to die! River may bring a gun but she wouldn't need to use it. As I remember Buffy refused the demonic powers the first Watchers(or whatevertherenameswhere) tried to give to her, the powers Buffy has are increased speed, strengh and the ability to sense demons and vamps. I think River has the same increased speed and strength Buffy had, but she got it in a more realistic way.

CHRISISALL

Wednesday, November 9, 2005 5:06 PM

I think the REAL question is: could Buffy wax all those Reavers?
I'd give it to River, no matter what Joss said.

Reader Chrisisall

SHINYTALENT

Friday, November 11, 2005 6:23 AM

River would definitely beat Buffy
1. She's crazy- that means she's even more inventive than Buffy.
2. Who knows what the Alliance unleashed when they fiddled with River's brain "I can kill you with my brain" and yeah Ok Buffy has slayer talents but I still don't think it's enough to beat River.

"Crazy beats big every time"

The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds given adequate vacuuming systems.

VADERNPINK

Friday, November 11, 2005 6:50 AM

Whatever, man Buffy would kick rivers ass if she wanted to, but why waste her time fighting her,she has better things to do like saving the world

vadernpink

GIANTEVILHEAD

Friday, November 11, 2005 6:52 AM

River was trained to be an assassin so she should be able to eliminate her target as quickly and as efficiently as possible. Buffy on the other hand has a habit of making witty and sometimes stinging comments during her fights because as we all know the greatest weakness of demons is their pride and those cutting remarks are far more painful than punches and axe wounds.

"I swallowed a bug." -River Tam

FREDIKAYLLOW

Sunday, November 13, 2005 12:50 AM

i see we have some strong differences of opinion here. i didn't think anybody would respond actually.

and yes, i actually got the idea from the great caveman/astronaut debate.

i personally reckon river would beat buffy, but probably die from internal bleeding afterward (buffy can hit pretty hard)

No Power In The 'Verse Can Stop Me

CAUSAL

Sunday, November 13, 2005 1:00 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by 11thHour:
There's also the extra bonus in River's favor with that "I can kill you with my brain" ability

I don't think River can kill anyone with her brain. My take on the "kill you with my brain" comment was that River (being psychic) knew that nothing would scare Jayne more than the idea that something could kill him without him having any chance of fighting back against it. River can't kill anyone with her brain. Were that the case, why fist fight all those Reavers? Why not just telepathically zap them? Remember, Joss said psychic was the furthest from reality he was willing to go, and I would suggest that there's a mighty big leap from plain psychic to psychokinetic killing.

________________________________________________________________________
I wish I had a magical wish-granting plank.

GIANTEVILHEAD

Sunday, November 13, 2005 1:04 AM

Killing someone with the brain does not necessarily mean psychokinesis, it could just be telepathy, telling someone’s brain to shut down their heart and lungs.

"I swallowed a bug." -River Tam

CAUSAL

Sunday, November 13, 2005 1:47 AM

Even if I grant you that, River still cannot kill anyone with her brain. She'd have done in the fight with the Reavers, would have been more efficient. Woulda done to the Alliance troopers came crashing through the wall afterward (instead of tightening her grip on her weapons). Nope, she can't do it; she was trying to scare Jayne (and it worked) and Joss was trying to make us laugh (and it worked).

________________________________________________________________________
I wish I had a magical wish-granting plank.

MINDREADER

Sunday, November 13, 2005 2:01 AM

no no no fred from angel the physco girl in the 8th dimension or w/e vs. river that wuld b cwl!!

LIGHTMEDARK

Sunday, November 13, 2005 2:07 AM

River wins, hands down.

...but then again I can't stand SMG

---
inch towards daylight

11THHOUR

Sunday, November 13, 2005 1:42 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Causal:
Quote:
Originally posted by 11thHour:
There's also the extra bonus in River's favor with that "I can kill you with my brain" ability

I don't think River can kill anyone with her brain. My take on the "kill you with my brain" comment was that River (being Psychic) knew that nothing would scare Jayne more than the idea that something could kill him without him having any chance of fighting back against it. River can't kill anyone with her brain. Were that the case, why fist fight all those Reavers? Why not just telepathically zap them? Remember, Joss said psychic was the furthest from reality he was willing to go, and I would suggest that there's a mighty big leap from plain psychic to psychokinetic killing.

Gee, you're discussing my post as though I was being serious.

Didn't the mud wrestling, cage match, kicking in the head, et.al. (everything not in the section you quoted), goofiness give away that I was just having fun with the thread topic?

________________________________________________

"Because teenage pranks are fun when you're about to die!" - Hoban Washburne

CAUSAL

Sunday, November 13, 2005 1:46 PM

No, no, that much I get. But the killing with the brain thing has been bothering me for a spell, so I think I just needed to vent. Sorry to be serious in a funny thread.

I'd like to second the motion on the mud wrestling.

________________________________________________________________________
I wish I had a magical wish-granting plank.

11THHOUR

Monday, November 14, 2005 8:10 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Causal:
No, no, that much I get. But the killing with the brain thing has been bothering me for a spell, so I think I just needed to vent. Sorry to be serious in a funny thread.

That's alright.

On the whole 'killing with my brain' thing, I thought Joss was alluding to that in those viral marketing online vids. The gaging, bleeding, and slow, gruesome demise drama... but it seems to take a few minutes. Perhaps River doesn't use that ability in a fight scenario because it takes too long?

Quote:
I'd like to second the motion on the mud wrestling.

Yep... barefoot, full contact, mud wrestling...

Of course in the case of a Reaver battle... blood wrestling...

11th

________________________________________________

"Because teenage pranks are fun when you're about to die!" - Hoban Washburne

CAUSAL

Monday, November 14, 2005 12:34 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by 11thHour:
On the whole 'killing with my brain' thing, I thought Joss was alluding to that in those viral marketing online vids. The gaging, bleeding, and slow, gruesome demise drama... but it seems to take a few minutes. Perhaps River doesn't use that ability in a fight scenario because it takes too long?

If you watch the vids (if I remember correctly), River asks for the interviewer for his pen. River didn't kill the man with her brain. She plunged his pen into his throat. That would explain both the gurgling and the length of time. And it's more in keeping with the tone of the 'verse.

________________________________________________________________________
I wish I had a magical wish-granting plank.

MAYLAFAY

Tuesday, November 22, 2005 3:09 AM

Okay this is what I think. River being able to read minds would be able to "see" anything coming. Like me playing a chess game, and I already know what the other person is going to move.

Buffy doesn't have that, she has quick reflexes but that's all.

As for who would win It'd be River. Buffy is powerful, but emotionly unstable if she's not sure what she's fighting for. If you want an example put in any season, ans see how dependent she's on emotions/friends

As for River.... Well she's insane which gives her the unpreditable point.

SHADO

Wednesday, November 23, 2005 3:57 PM

No contest at all. River would thrash Buffy. Shes much better in every aspect, except as mentioned before, strenght. But does that really matter when you have so many other weapons?, no it dont.

BLACKOUTNIGHTS

Wednesday, November 23, 2005 4:38 PM

I agree with Maylafly. River would know every move that's coming beforehand no matter how many times Buffy rose from the dead.

QUEENOFTHENORTH

Wednesday, November 23, 2005 5:10 PM

I'd say Buffy, cuz of the superhuman strength and stamina. She could just wait until River tires out. Not to mention she's got more experience. As for the emotionally unstable thing, River's more emotionally unstable than Buffy. The only reason why she fights the Reavers is because Simon and the others are pretty much done for. Up until that point she's just cowering in the corner. But it would sure be an interesting fight either way .

Like books? Go to this thread: http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=14862
to find out how to buy mine!

MELMOTH

Sunday, November 27, 2005 7:27 PM

Buffy vs. River?
Depends. Buffy doesn't start to sleep when you say her some certain words.
But without that, probably River. She is more ruthless and conditioned.

Melmoth

"He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. When you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you."
- Friedrich Nietzsche

FIREFLYSLAYER

Tuesday, November 29, 2005 7:24 AM

River has some sick moves, but Buffy has supernatural slayer-perks on her side. She will hit harder and be able to take blows better, because she's the Slayer. River would have normal human strength and react the same way to a hit as any other normal person. So I'd have to go with Buffy on this one, even though River is more fun to watch fighting.

DARIENDAYSHADOW

Wednesday, December 21, 2005 7:45 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by 3HeadedMonkey:
catfight with 2 hot chicks. who would win?

the fans. :D

I agree with you 100 percent.

mwahahahaha

VIKING

Wednesday, December 21, 2005 8:30 AM

mother off stupidenty:)

this makes as muche sense as talking about wheter the Trekk or EA B5 ships are more powerfull

it really doesnt matter they both work in ther own vers

The wages of sin are death, but the hours are good and the perks are fantastic.

RUXTON

Thursday, December 22, 2005 5:59 AM

Buffy wins, hands down.

But River might have made a good slayer....

BLACKRABBIT

Thursday, December 22, 2005 7:06 AM

Oh please...River survived life in an Alliance Torture Facility with no help.

Buffy only had to survive a horny Spike, still died twice, and had to have her friends constantly helping her.

Victory: River in the 3rd Round.

TAMGAL

Friday, December 23, 2005 2:05 AM

Of course River would win, no Duh!

They weren't cows inside. They were waiting to be, but they forgot. Now they see the sky and they remember what they are.

DARIENDAYSHADOW

Friday, December 23, 2005 5:29 AM

River would buffy.
buffy after river gets done.
me when river wins
Here is spike and angel
i run to river
Here she is

I'm a leaf in the wind, watch how I soar"

TAMGAL

Friday, December 23, 2005 5:32 AM

how nice

"They weren't cows inside. They were waiting to be, but they forgot. Now they see the sky and they remember what they are." -River, Safe

DARIENDAYSHADOW

Friday, December 23, 2005 5:41 AM

Its the truth
I wanna meet summer. And Jewel. Everyone. But them mostly

I'm a leaf in the wind, watch how I soar"
-Wash- pilot of serenity

TAMGAL

Friday, December 23, 2005 9:32 PM

me too, Summer Glau and Jewel Staite are awesome!

"They weren't cows inside. They were waiting to be, but they forgot. Now they see the sky and they remember what they are." -River, Safe

SPINLAND

Friday, December 23, 2005 9:39 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Giantevilhead:
River's smart enough to bring a gun to the fight.

ROFL! That gets my vote for the definitive answer!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"That's what governments are for, [to] get in a man's way." -- Malcolm Reynolds

DATALESS

Friday, December 23, 2005 10:20 PM

What if River is a slayer? That would explain why she is like nothing the allaince has seen and ideal for defense deployment. She might have had the mental aspects of the slayers which was enhanced by the mental stripping. She was about the same age when Buffy was called to be a slayer. Buffy can also be described as a creature of extraordinary grace. Though not quite crazy she has her share of problems and I think that is part of the curse of being a slayer. While I think that River might be a slayer either way, I think she would still kick Buffy's ass blindfolded (just to be clear that River is the one with the blindfold on.) Now Faith on the other hand...

DARIENDAYSHADOW

Friday, December 23, 2005 11:04 PM

Dude Faith would get smeared all over the gorram walls. She is a walking piece of gossah. :evil
River Rox

I'm a leaf in the wind, watch how I soar"

BLACKRABBIT

Sunday, December 25, 2005 7:18 AM

River gorramit. Why we still talkin' 'bout what's already been decided?

USMC

Monday, December 26, 2005 3:29 AM

Hmm, I don't know if you all know it or not, but Buffy is a character based on a TV show, so Hands Down....River wins!

DATALESS

Monday, December 26, 2005 4:42 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by USMC:
Hmm, I don't know if you all know it or not, but Buffy is a character based on a TV show, so Hands Down....River wins!

I dont know know if you know but Buffy was orignally a motion picture, all be it horrific one but still a movie. So who wins now? The canceled show made in to a movie a sadly unsuccessful movie or the very, very bad movie and into a cult hit TV series.

USMC

Monday, December 26, 2005 4:48 PM

OMG, I tried for years to forget the Buffy movie, now i hav to start over again. I only recently caught a few episodes of the buffy sereies, was not for me. I did see the chic who stuck a flute in her p%ssy at band camp though. I know, Summer did an episode on buffy or something like that, but i would have to support River on this one, no contest, hands down, thats my girl. However when I go to the Transformers forums and it is Optimus Prime vs River, i would have to say Prime for the win. When i go to the Windows forums and it is Bill Gates vs River, i would say Gates gets the win over their. Ok, I dont know where I was going with that, but over here in these forums, i think River can kick anyones ASS!

QUOTHTHERAVEN

Friday, December 30, 2005 5:57 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by HobanIWashburne:
Heheee. True. She would bring a gun... but would she run out of bullets if Buffy kept springing up alive again? :: grinz in silliness ::

Now wait, you can't kill a slayer twice the same way. has she been shot to death yet? i know she's been dropped, drowned, and probably a couple others i have not thought of, but . . .

But River would win; i mean, buffy can thrash 4-5 vamps at the same time, but River thrashed 25 Reavers with an axe, a sword, and her good looks to help her. Buffy always has to come in with some little sneak attack plan and kill all the vamps when they're not paying attention or have Angel/Zander/Giles/Willow/Guy with platter of cheese jump in and save her. River was crowdsurfing in them at one point, but got down to the floor and killed them with nary a scratch. River wins. End of story.

WAH

Wednesday, January 4, 2006 11:43 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by QuothTheRaven:
Quote:
Originally posted by HobanIWashburne:
Heheee. True. She would bring a gun... but would she run out of bullets if Buffy kept springing up alive again? :: grinz in silliness ::

Now wait, you can't kill a slayer twice the same way. has she been shot to death yet? i know she's been dropped, drowned, and probably a couple others i have not thought of, but . . .

But River would win; i mean, buffy can thrash 4-5 vamps at the same time, but River thrashed 25 Reavers with an axe, a sword, and her good looks to help her. Buffy always has to come in with some little sneak attack plan and kill all the vamps when they're not paying attention or have Angel/Zander/Giles/Willow/Guy with platter of cheese jump in and save her. River was crowdsurfing in them at one point, but got down to the floor and killed them with nary a scratch. River wins. End of story.

Right on every point. In addition to Buffy being unable to fight a crowd without help, she also fights the highly untrained. The best fighters she ever battles just hit slightly harder or have some combat training. For the most part, she only fights inexperienced vamps, which, except for their exceptional strength, are average people with no combat experience. River on the other hand, is a trained assasin that knows every lethal point on the body. Just think of the Operative's neat nerve attack, then assume RIver those that, plus a hundred others. Not only that, but Buffy's famous plans are out the window because River is both beyond genius, and telepathic, meaning she'd know Buffy's moves before she made them. River would win, by a landslide, in a fraction of a second. Just hit all of Buffy's vital spots while she's still throwing the first punch

WAH!!...It's a warrior like...strikes fear into the hearts of...

PRESIDENTE

Monday, January 9, 2006 6:20 PM

I'd like to see Yoda fight River, that would freak out River so much, Due to her unstable emotional state, haveing this green blob bounching around like a maniac!!!

PRESIDENTE

Monday, January 9, 2006 6:21 PM

THEFAN

Wednesday, February 1, 2006 11:55 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Presidente:
I'd like to see Yoda fight River, that would freak out River so much, Due to her unstable emotional state, haveing this green blob bounching around like a maniac!!!

HAA!!!!!

"If the snow on the roof is too heavy, you see, the ceiling will cave in. His brains are in terrible danger."

HYDRAGON

Sunday, February 19, 2006 7:16 AM

Buffy would win.

Because Buffy. Always. Wins.

ALWAYS.

Buffy is strong, fast and agile. Not as fast and agile as River, granted, but fast and agile enough. She's defeated armies of demons at least twice, and even if she's dies, really, what does it matter? She'll just come back anyways, so even if River wins and dies of internal bleeding, Buffy still wins.

LADYKNIGHT

Friday, May 12, 2006 3:12 AM

River vs. Buffy?

I say they fight for a ten minutes, then, during a break in the action, team up against whoever put them in a position to fight in the first place!

...unless, of course, we're talking real motivation for battle here.

One day.
One mission.
One army of Browncoats.
On June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.
http://www.serenityday.org/

SHADOWFLY

Saturday, July 1, 2006 3:55 AM

Neither would win if my younger sister joined the fight. She would beat them both up, and while Buffy and River are lying there bleeding, broken, and wondering what just happened, my younger sister who leans more towards women folk, I'd say might just take some 'liberties' with them if you know what I mean.

PINBALLWIZARD

Saturday, July 1, 2006 4:11 AM

My answer?

They'd go off for some shopping and chat away at how dumb their guy friends and siblings are. Then they'd go into tag-team kickboxing and remain undefeated for their entire run, retire early, and use their combined fortunes to fund some much needed sequals of their own.

No, I am not insane, I am crazy. Thank you for asking.

PINBALLWIZARD

Saturday, July 1, 2006 4:11 AM

My answer?

They'd go off for some shopping and chat away at how dumb their guy friends and siblings are. Then they'd go into tag-team kickboxing and remain undefeated for their entire run, retire early, and use their combined fortunes to fund some much needed sequals of their own.

No, I am not insane, I am crazy. Thank you for asking.

MADMAN007

Saturday, July 1, 2006 5:09 AM

Who says River doesn't have the Slayer lineage?

Anyway, points are good either way. But, why are Buffy and River fighting? They both fight on the side of good. Try these.

River vs Faith

River vs. Glory

River vs. Dark Willow

How about them odds!

"No.....THIS is what going mad feels like.

SHADOWFLY

Saturday, July 1, 2006 5:21 AM

Buffy and River wouldn't stand a chance against dark Willow and her magics.

ECHONELSON

Sunday, August 6, 2006 6:05 AM

Buffy wins hands down and here is why. In the lost slayer series buffy's mentor giles is turned into a vampire. He is now very similar to river. Because he trained Buffy he knows all of her movements. This is very much like River with her being able to read Buffy's mind. Giles was also as stronge and as fast as Buffy where as River is neither and Giles was smarter then Buffy like River. And hey geuss what? Buffy kicked Giles ass.

River can take on 25 reavers. Ok well Buffy can take on 5-9 vamps. The reavers are still humans with no experience in fighting just like the vamps. But the vamps can take on like 8 humans unarmed. So if buffy can take on 5-9 vamps and one of them can take on 8 reavers, that means buffy can take on up to like 72 reavers. As I said Buffy wins hands down.

But i still think they should fight together...

What was that??
~Mal~

BROWNCOATSAWAY

Thursday, October 19, 2006 6:09 PM

huh i am not really a fan of sarah m gellar, but i'm pretty sure river will beat the snot out of her. River is a bit unpredictable she will chop at your juggular before you take another breath. buffy will go down. Man, river be fighting reavers.

BROWNCOATSAWAY

Thursday, October 19, 2006 6:16 PM

reavers do know how to fight and they crave the same thing that vamps do. But reavers are more sadistic they rape and eat you alive. vamps are sophisticated they go for direct bloodsucking kill.

BLUEEYEDBRIGADIER

Thursday, October 19, 2006 8:56 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Fredikayllow:
Okay, i don't know if I'm posting this in the right place, or if this has been done before, but i wanted to know what you think:

River and Buffy get into a fight.
No weapons- only bare hands.
Who would win??

No Power In The 'Verse Can Stop Me

Ok...before I give my 2 credits' worth, let's look at the combatants, shall we?

River Tam
Age: 17

Background: Dancer and independent scholar

Abilities: Heightened reflexes, advanced combat training, empathic if not telepathic abilities, precognition, advanced intelligence and tactical skills, unstable mental state

Number of kills: 1 creepy-ass doctor played by Joss (impalement of pen through trachea); 3 guards at Niska's Skyplex (gunshot wounds to vital areas); 1+ bar patrons (gunshot wounds plus several possible fatal strikes from hand-to-hand moves); and approximately 20+ Reavers (eviscerated via commandeered melee weapons)

Elizabeth Anne "Buffy" Summers
Age: 22-23

Background: Cheerleading, gymnastics

Abilities: Heightened speed, strength and agility; precognition; extrasensory perception of demonic forces; above average intelligence

Number of kills: 0 humans; 250+ vampires, 1 Hellgod; 1+ (been awhile since I've seen S7 completely) Turok-Han ubervampire; 1 serpent demon; and 1 human-demon-cyborg hybrid.

So...in the end, the fight would be close...but I give it to River. Mainly cuz of the kills stats for humans. River (including her time under a fugue state) has offed 25+ humans; Buffy has never killed a human being.

I would hypothesize that Buffy would pull punches at first, since River's human. This gives River the opportunity to make some nasty opening moves that force Buffy to up the ante. This means the fight equals out, with Buffy's higher strength cancelling out River's strike accuracy. However, River can sense the focus from Buffy in deliving strikes that will take River down without killing, so she blocks said shots. Stamina factors in, so River knows she's got to finish up before her edge starts weakening from exhaustion and slower healing powers. Then River just goes completely apeshit and lays Buffy out. Cuz River is a dangerous little lady when pushed to her limits. 'Specially if the lives of the crew are at stake.

Literature has shown us some of humanity's greatest achievements; history, some of our greatest failures -- Alun Lewis

FREDIKAYLLOW

Thursday, October 26, 2006 12:06 AM

wow!! i'm so proud!! my little thread has become a topic of hot discussion!!!
i have decided (as the creator of this thread) that i am going to add a scenario as to WHY they are fighting.

So Willow figures out a way to time travel, but with no accuracy of destination. they end up on Haven (pre-BDM)while the crew are having a visit. River immediately senses something, notices the presence of Dark Willow inside our loevly dear normal Willow, and goes ape-**** attacking her. Buffy of course goes to defend her (thinking River is probably a demon) and they fight, River determined to kill anyone who is a threat to the crew, and Buffy determined to kill anyone who is a threat to her friends.

And now, the argument continues. By adding these extra factors (protecting the ones they love) it should up the ante of their fight.

Have fun!!!!

No Power In The 'Verse Can Stop Me
XOXOX-FREDIKAYLLOW-XOXOX

BLUEEYEDBRIGADIER

Thursday, October 26, 2006 12:40 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Fredikayllow:
wow!! I’m so proud!! My little thread has become a topic of hot discussion!!!
I have decided (as the creator of this thread) that I am going to add a scenario as to WHY they are fighting.

So Willow figures out a way to time travel, but with no accuracy of destination. They end up on Haven (pre-BDM) while the crew are having a visit. River immediately senses something, notices the presence of Dark Willow inside our lovely dear normal Willow, and goes ape-**** attacking her. Buffy of course goes to defend her (Thinking River is probably a demon) and they fight, River determined to kill anyone who is a threat to the crew, and Buffy determined to kill anyone who is a threat to her friends.

And now, the argument continues. By adding these extra factors (protecting the ones they love) it should up the ante of their fight.

Have fun!!!!

No Power In the 'Verse Can Stop Me
XOXOX-FREDIKAYLLOW-XOXOX

Ooh...that makes things interesting! Hmm...Gonna have to re-evaluate the scenario...

*punches new data in the Whedonverse Fight Computer and waits for an answer*

And the result is....too pornographic to mention?!? 'Cuse me a sec...

*wails on the Computer, which spits a new answer*

Now then! The result is...River, cuz of Willow!

Alright...let's see about the logic:

- River senses Willow's dark personality and it provokes her as a danger to crew safety

- Buffy notices River rushing up and tries to stop her

- Short scuffle forces separation for re-orientation of attack plans

- River lays out a cryptic comment about Dark Willow, causing Buffy to open her can of verbal whoopass by snidely remarking on a need for Spike to translate for Drusilla Junior (or something of that nature, since I ain't the dialogue maven Joss is)

- Allies of combatants line up behind fighters, with Willow working up a spell or two for release and the Gunfighter Trio (Mal, Zoë and Jayne) expose some iron

- Simon tries to reason with River, provoking a variation on the cryptic comment noted earlier about Willow's dark side

- Buffy (or Willow) throws out comment about how that isn't his sister anymore or to stand back while River gets her ass kicked

- Blistering fight begins with Buffy laying into River and River taking the punishment before giving it back (quantity vs. quality…guess who represents what mentality?)

- Mal, Zoë and Jayne take aim at Buffy but Willow zaps them, disarming them

- Seeing her friends in trouble, River kicks it into endgame mode and grapples with Buffy

- Buffy seems to get the upper hand when River slackens her grip, and starts to go for her stake when….

- River spins and grabs Buffy in an arm lock long enough to replicate The Operative’s nerve cluster pinch, paralyzing her and allowing River to knock her out with a brutal right cross (see start of slo-mo shot of River fighting Reavers in BDM to get idea of shot’s strength) before…

- Grabbing Mr. Pointy and hurling it at a momentarily stunned Willow like a tomahawk, which strikes her in the forehead (blunt end making contact) hard enough to induce unconsciousness!

So...there ya have it! River wins and neither "enemy" party is dead...yet;)

Literature has shown us some of humanity's greatest achievements; history, some of our greatest failures -- Alun Lewis

CAVALIER

Thursday, October 26, 2006 10:27 PM

If the rest of the crew are around then there are firearms within reach of River.

Bang.

If River is not prepared to kill Willow, there is no point in attacking her, so no combat.

Might not make her very popular, I admit.

ROGUE7

Tuesday, November 14, 2006 1:39 AM

This is the first of my double posts.. Sorry!

I can slam a revolving door..

ROGUE7

Tuesday, November 14, 2006 1:40 AM

I'm thinking for sure River would win..
I mean I haven't witnessed ALL of Buffy or River's fights.. But I've seen a considerable amount of Buffy's.. And they were mostly against weak looking vampires. And she usually struggles.
Plus, I reckon River's craziness would way overpower Buffy's "superhuman abilities" (I've never seen her use these without the help of Willow or Giles).
AND as someone previously mentioned, Buffy's never killed a human, so she might be a bit more hesitant. Whereas River would just open a mumma huge can o' whoopass on Buffy.
That's my thoughts anyway.

PS. I got some great mental images while reading your sweet post BEB!! That would have taken some effort, well done!

I can slam a revolving door..

HAWKWING

Sunday, December 31, 2006 5:46 PM

River would win just cos shes a highly trained assassin...however you gotta trigger her first and hope shes not all loopy

DAREDEVIL

Saturday, January 13, 2007 9:45 AM

river can kick her ass buffy wont stand a chance with bare hands

LAWMAN

Tuesday, March 20, 2007 6:27 PM

hey, river wins, because this is the firefly site after all. why are we still talking about this?

i'll be in my bunk

22CLAWS

Wednesday, March 21, 2007 6:14 AM

Check it out:

http://fireflyfans.net/sunroomitem.asp?i=14370&nid=20465

22

DECAF

Wednesday, March 21, 2007 7:35 AM

"The stronger swordsman does not necessarily win. It is speed! Speed of hand, speed of mind."
- Abbe Faria, "The Count of Monte Cristo"

By that rationale, I have to go with River.

Luigi: Oh, and by the way, Buffy is the best fighter I have ever seen.
Edmond: Perhaps you should get out more.

_________________________________
"The probability that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us from the support of a cause we believe to be just."
- Abraham Lincoln

RIVER6213

Monday, April 23, 2007 3:50 AM

Last year I would have said that River would have won, but now after watching a lot of BtVS, I think that Buffy would win. River is skilled and a natural fighter, but Buffy has that demon strength and speed working in her favor. River would be out done by mystical powers which Buffy has.

-River

GIRLYBILLY

Friday, May 18, 2007 1:45 AM

buffy she has more heart for fighting than river not saying she doesn't have heart it's just not in the fighting so much, plus she can know what buffy is about to do but she won't be fast enought to deal with it. Buffy is way strong and faster than river. River is simply a person, we don't know if the alliance did anything more than train her it. If they changed her actual body then maube she is more like buffy and it is far fight, but otherwise river is just human. a cool and phsyic human but only human buffy would kick her ass. If it was a long term fight river would stand a chance the whole kill her with her mind. yep one on one in a room buffy would win
weeks on end who knows

girlybilly
more girly then billy

POETPYRATESCOUNDREL

Monday, June 18, 2007 8:50 AM

i personally have to agree with the person who said they would team up to kick the ass of the person who set them to fightin.

as we all know, joss is an old-school comicbook geek. and what is more old-school comicbook than two heroes meeting for the first time, fighting each other a bit, then realizing oh wait--THAT'S the bad guy!

adding the detail of dark willow being involved, buffy would doubtless notice the veiny-ness of her.

now as to river being a slayer....a very nice thought. 'bout a year ago i played in a serenity tabletop rp a while....joined the game a couple weeks in to the campaign....and i warped the players' and characters' minds when my character turned out to be a watcher, come to start training one of the pc's, as the council had id'ed her as a potential. (got mad bonus xp's or whatever they call it in that game for my detailed character background that linked the impending doom of the series finale of angel with the environmental crisis that sparked the exodus from earth-that-was, and the number of slayers in the new solar system having been reduced since the exodus because if a slayer dies in the black, she doesn't call a replacement) ....our GM ended up taking my character's background and sending the whole campaign down a whole new path involving vampiric reavers....good times.

DEL

Saturday, July 14, 2007 10:20 PM

Y would they be fighting in the first place? Remember Buffy is LOOOONG dead, River is living in the future guys!

If they did of course River would win anyway, she's way cooler and doesn't need a scooby gang to kick ass. Plus she's crazy which makes her far more interesting and the interesting one's ough to win.

RIVERFLAN

Wednesday, August 22, 2007 1:00 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Causal:
Even if I grant you that, River still cannot kill anyone with her brain. She'd have done in the fight with the Reavers, would have been more efficient. Woulda done to the Alliance troopers came crashing through the wall afterward (instead of tightening her grip on her weapons). Nope, she can't do it; she was trying to scare Jayne (and it worked) and Joss was trying to make us laugh (and it worked).

________________________________________________________________________
I wish I had a magical wish-granting plank.

Keep in mind that it was a movie, and that fit the plot better. Also, maybe she can kill only one person at a time. She was trained as an assassin, is a super athlete, and she can read Buffy's mind and use her worst fears against her.
In other words: RIVER WINS!!!

River: "The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds, given adequate vaccuuming systems."

RIVERFLAN

Wednesday, August 22, 2007 1:24 AM

Okay, that was the serious arguement. Now: If you think Buffy should win, you belong on the Buffy site, not the Firefly site! Leave us loyal Flans in peace and stop babbling nonsense!! RIVER WINS!!! SHE WINS HANDS DOWN!!! SHE TOTALLY KICKSASS ON ANYONE!!!

River: "The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds, given adequate vaccuuming systems."

CAUSAL

Wednesday, August 22, 2007 3:08 AM

Where, oh where is that eye-rolling emote when you need it?

________________________________________________________________________

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- Vote JonnyQuest/Causal, for Benevolent Co-Dictator of Earth; together, toward a brighter tomorrow!

PCCH7

Saturday, January 16, 2010 6:09 PM

River would kick the living shit out of Buffy.. She´s better in every way except strength, which doesn´t matter if you can´t get a hit in.. River is a much better fighter and her stamina would probably be at the peak of human ability. Buffy has problems with normal vampires at times, vampires that Giles and Xander and the likes can fight and seemingly almost match in strength. She wouldn´t get a hit in and River would totally kick her ass. She would get her down and break her neck or something..

"Summer Glau can simply walk into Mordor.."

TEASER

Monday, March 29, 2010 7:04 PM

Despite Buffy being a supernatural being, River would be my dog in this fight. If she survived the fight long enough to realize that Buffy was extraordinary (which I expect she would), she’d conjure a way to defeat her. I think there was a layer of truth when she said to Jayne,”I can kill you with by brain”. River would just do the math. Assuming there were no hidden variables, she’d figure out how to defeat Buffy. To River, a fight is not an emotional contest of speed strength and will; it’s simply a dynamic problem to be solved and she is extraordinarily good at solving those problems.

In the scenario set up by FREDIKAYLLOW, River’d see Willow as the real threat. She’d try to bypass Buffy to eliminate her. In River's mind she’d have already choreographed how the fight would play out. But when Buffy fails to fall to River’s first kick, the opening gambit, which, if successful, would end with Willow being removed from the game, and is instead knocked to the floor by Buffy, she has to recalculate. She’d enter Buffy’s mind. Learn her strategy, her tactics, her capabilities, her weaknesses, and what she was planning to do right now, as she’d have already done and would still doing with Willow. Like a chess master on speed, River’s mind would flash through the millions of permutations of how events would play out given any action she initiated. She’d calculate not only the mass and velocities of the objects in space, but the actions and reactions of all the people in play. She’d find the solution. Retreat behind Jayne, leaving him to delay Buffy. Scoop a firearm up as she passed and fire two precise shots from behind Mal killing first Willow and then Buffy.

River is a creation of the Alliance. Like the Operative. There is no nobility in her battles only cold logic and steel. It is the calculus the Alliance used to win the war. In Buffy’s universe good defeats the forces of darkness. The “Powers that be” control the game. Serenity Valley disillusioned Mal of any belief that the “Powers that be” exist in his verse. That Right has any place on the battlefield. In Mal’s world guns decide a fight not God or what’s right.

If River’d been transported to Buffy’s universe, Buffy’d win, but in Mal’s verse, Buffy ends up with a bullet in the brain.