GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Male and Female Imponderables

POSTED BY: TRISTAN
UPDATED: Tuesday, September 26, 2006 05:29
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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:17 AM

LYSANDER


I'm not sure what it is Tristan but you and I seem to be on the same page here. I think it is great that you and your wife sword fight together. My wife is more of a watcher while I do the sword fighting. As for the flirting thing, you seem to have it down. I don't think that there is anything wrong with it. To make an intellectual connection with someone else is not a bad thing. It gives a certain level of thrill to both parties. It's a good feeling as should be felt by everyone. There does not have to be any mention of the physical. What I have with my wife is a great thing and I would not change it for the world. It sounds like Tristan and his wife are much the same. Congratulations! It is more like a fun game in which all parties feel good about themselves. I don't know how much this is going to help Tristan, but I do know that chivalry has passed many people by over these many years.

Simon: What if he(Mal) tells you to kill me.
Zoe: (without hesitation) I kill you.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:26 AM

MSCKAREN


So many topics already in this thread:

Smaller breasts have more sensitive nipples:

I think this may stem from the fact that when a woman gets a breast enlargement the nerves often end up damaged so they may look pretty but they aren't going to give the girl much of a thrill... One of the reasons I decided against this procedure back in my 20s. I was foolishly dating and ended up marrying (later divorcing) a boob man when I should have gotten myself a butt guy. C'est la vie!

Flirting:

Not my forte but I appreciate it when it's done well. I guess it could be classified as a game depending on the intentions of the people involved. It is kind of a dangerous gateway for marrieds or "committeds", IMHO.

Bad boys:

Love 'em. This is frankly because, in my limited experience, they are better in bed. I don't need a man to support me or be a father to my children. I can take care of fixin' things or have the means to pay to have them fixed. So they only thing I need a man for is sex. Nice guys are just too nice for the kind of sex I like - even when I tell them exactly what I want. (Please, don't e-mail me any offers - I'm happy with what I have right now!)

Makeup:

Again, in my experience men who say they don't like make-up mean they don't like an artificial look. They prefer the "natural" look which means no blue/green eyeshadow, heavy eyeliner, deep red rouge or lipstick. But most (I'm sure there are a few exceptions) seem to like the look of a tinted chapstick and a bit of mascara (waterproof).

These are my opinions/experience and not meant to say anybody else is wrong. Viva la difference!



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Appears they've cancelled the show and we're still here. What does that make us?"
"Big damn junkies, Sir!"
"Ain't we just."
http://karenallover.blogspot.com/

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:33 AM

TRISTAN


Thank you, Lysander. It's good to know I am not alone.
Sex...no, I did not mention it. With my wife, wonderful, with others, not an interest of mine. I am completely happy with what I have in that department, but we both also love the flirting...like you said, weird to those that don't understand. No, we are not swingers, and no, neither one of us is having an affair--that is for all the others reading this with a raised eyebrow.
Chivalry is not dead by any stretch of the imagination...at least in my little world!

MSCKAREN, it is nice to see an opinion like that. Thank you for being frank! I, for one, have always wondered if females feel the same level of lusts as males do.

Holding until you get back, Captain.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:48 AM

FUTUREMRSFILLION


13

I certainly hope you don't go around (a) telling girls your IQ or (b) telling them that you are a crap load smarter than they are!

Suffice it to say that I am very intelligent. Some me are intimidated by that, I just don't date those men.

You should find girls more your equal.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:59 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Appreciate the input TRISTAN. Through the grapevine the feelings are mutual, but we just haven't met in the middle yet. She is not married and I have enough self respect to hold out for someone who can meet my prerequisites, (better looking, richer, and smarter than me). She also understsnds that I'd been places and done things I'm not proud of. She sees me as the "hero" everyone else sees, but she beats my ego to a pulp when it emerges. She left me all turned about and Mal-adjusted.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 12:20 PM

SAMEERTIA


Quote:

Originally posted by 13:

In general, would you feel unattracted to a guy if was a crapload smarter than you? I've learned from experience that it does, and have suffered greatly from my damn 156 i.q, as lots of girls immediately classify me as a nerd or a geek.

(Just realized the irony of that statement.)

I think a little chaos is in order.




I'm not a teen-ager, but YES! '

Men who are alot smarter than I am intimidate and scare the hell out of me. If I can't keep up in a conversation, or if they're suddenly calculating the algorithm that determines the amount of salt that falls out of a salt shaker at dinner (I shit you not. It has happened to me on a date!), I get scared and run away like the dumb bunny I am!

Alot of that has far more to do with my own insecurities. I know I'm not stupid, but I'm never going to be a River Tam. Anything more advanced than Algebra 101 is beyond my mathematical ability.

So, to have a guy who thinks way beyond my capabilities, even though he may think the world of me, and reassure me constantly that he thinks I'm smart- well, I feel like a moron constantly. And that's not fun.


As for breasts, as a bisexual with a pair of my own, I think I can honestly say from experience that it depends on the woman, not the breast.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 12:30 PM

ELOISA


Quote:

Originally posted by 13:
In general, would you feel unattracted to a guy if was a crapload smarter than you? I've learned from experience that it does, and have suffered greatly from my damn 156 i.q, as lots of girls immediately classify me as a nerd or a geek.

(Just realized the irony of that statement.)



In a teenager? If the IQ wasn't matched by a bit of obvious emotional intelligence, frankly, yes. In an older guy who's had time to a) develop and b) demonstrate said social IQ, I'd see it as an asset.

***
http://forums.ffonline.com/forumdisplay.php?f=19
Creative Writing

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 12:57 PM

TRISTAN


Not a problem, NVGhostrider. Sometimes a stranger has some good input, sometimes not...
Let me know how it works out.

Holding until you get back, Captain.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 1:24 PM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by 13:
What moron said everbody hates Chris? Was it Fox? Whatever. Alright, question for all the teenage girls out there:

In general, would you feel unattracted to a guy if was a crapload smarter than you? I've learned from experience that it does, and have suffered greatly from my damn 156 i.q, as lots of girls immediately classify me as a nerd or a geek.

(Just realized the irony of that statement.)

I think a little chaos is in order.



Again, not a teenage girl, but having actually been out with a near genius I feel I can comment. It was actually his intellect that drew me to him. Sometimes he just said things that were so witty and clever that I just had to jump on him and rip all his clothes off! (On reflection this might have been my genes controlling me, as he's have made superior kids! Damn biology and its subliminal effects!)

The problem came when he became short tempered and impatient with me when I couldn't keep up. Because I wasn't as instantly articulate as him and occasionally had trouble expressing my thoughts in presicely correct terms he would tend to dismiss whatever I said! Very frustrating and horribly bad for the ego! So a little warning, develop your patience skills. It'll get you more sex for longer!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 3:10 PM

NUCLEARDAY


Quote:

Originally posted by jpstargazer:
I don't really care what physical feature women check out first, as I can't really change any of that. I do want to know how a girl's interest in you is so "subtle" that you don't even notice until it's too late, and then it's all to apparent (guilty of this on several occasions).


LOL, historically I've been absolutely clueless when it comes to a girl dropping hints my way :) This has been known to go on for years. Doesn't generally help that I've never been terribly good at broaching the whole "you and me" subject with anyone I've been interested in. ('Course that's where my little sister comes in handy, as it's always so terribly obvious to her :)

To be fair, though, I think I've been guilty of the same thing: being too subtle about being interested in someone.

Far as the wrist to middle-finger thing: that's pretty accurate on my end I suppose.

And I'd generally rather not have her spend too much time on my own nipples (maybe as I guy I'm still not terribly settled on just why I have them or something :) But in the interests of fair play, I've been known to acquiesce to the wishes of my partner on more than one occasion. :P
________________________________________________
You can take my hope when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers. (Or if Kaylee asks me nicely...)

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 5:02 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by Dayve:
i've always wondered why some women prefer a life more akin to a day time soap opera than a stable, loving homelife....



Funny, I've wondered the same thing about men. I just had my heart broken, and the reason I was given was that we didn't have any "spontaniety" which was really, really not true. He just got used to how our relationship worked. I liked the stability, esspecially because we had the trick down of stability and passion in one neat little package; but I guess he didn't like it. So it's not just a female mystery, is it?

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 5:33 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Alright, now I've read the rest of this thread so:
Size has nothing to do with sensitivity (unless there are implants, as mentioned) I am almost painfully sensitive at times and I'm a C, so that has nothing to do with it. I think that sensitivity is in the mind as much as the body, too, from my personal experience , but that's a long drawn out thing that I don't have time to go into as I'm at work. Maybe later if people really want to hear about it.
Subtle hints; yeah, I stopped trying that awhile ago. If youre too subtle he doesn't notice you, I realized this very early in my life. So, I try to be obvius. I found giving hugs, sitting in laps, and asking guys if they liked me to be very good techniques. Even the smart guys (who I happen to find very attractive; I have a 140-something IQ myself, by-the-by) were clueless unless I just came out and asked them. I don't mind being direct.
Most important thing in a relationship to me is honesty. Trust comes from honesty, knowing what you have in common comes from honesty, everything comes from being honest. Too many people try and be or act a certain way to impress someone, and it never works. I think one of the problems with my most recent relationship (read: heartbreak) was that we had some very differing views on a few things, and he could never come right out and say it. I don't know why. People should know who they are and not be afraid to show it. Honesty to yourself is as important to success as honesty to your partner. I'm not just being bitter here!
What else? It has been conclusively proven that feet are not an indicator of size. I don't know that hands really are, either. I don't know that anything is. I've known guys with quite large hands and, uh, not very large members. My recent ex had very slender fingers, though they were pretty long, and he was surprisingly thick (try losing your virginity to that ouchouchouch) so I don't think that's an inicator either. I can't say if size matters to me since I've only had the one full-fledged partner, but I really don't think there's a way to tell without seeing someone naked.
What do I notice first? The face. Overall face, ending with the eyes as my focus. I like a nice voice and good conversation. Someone who really knows how to speak is very attractive. In terms of body, I notice different things depending on the gender. I think anyone can have a beautiful body if they're attractive to me in other ways. But I'm kind of an ass girl, for both genders, and I love women's waists and men's chests.
Did I cover everything? I think I did...

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 5:39 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Had a discussion about nipples with a ex of mine once. And what I learned from that discussion is that people with small breast (like she had) generally have softer bras and since there nipples dont get irritated by constant exposure to fabrics they become more sensitive, while women with larger breast have bras with less stuffing and therefore there niples are exposed to more agitation and become less sensitive. She also told me that she barely could use shirts if she hadnt a bra on because it hurt like hell for a while, but also that after a week or two she wouldnt be so sensitive any longer and didnt need to use a bra to protect her nipples, and ive learned that the reason men generelly have less sensitive nipples is the simple fact, we have no bras at all and therefore our nipples constantly are exposed to stimulation by shirts and other clothingitems and we lose much of our sensetivity in that region. And ofcourse, some people are just more sensitive then others.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 5:39 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Had a discussion about nipples with a ex of mine once. And what I learned from that discussion is that people with small breast (like she had) generally have softer bras and since there nipples dont get irritated by constant exposure to fabrics they become more sensitive, while women with larger breast have bras with less stuffing and therefore there niples are exposed to more agitation and become less sensitive. She also told me that she barely could use shirts if she hadnt a bra on because it hurt like hell for a while, but also that after a week or two she wouldnt be so sensitive any longer and didnt need to use a bra to protect her nipples, and ive learned that the reason men generelly have less sensitive nipples is the simple fact, we have no bras at all and therefore our nipples constantly are exposed to stimulation by shirts and other clothingitems and we lose much of our sensetivity in that region. And ofcourse, some people are just more sensitive then others.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 5:39 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Had a discussion about nipples with a ex of mine once. And what I learned from that discussion is that people with small breast (like she had) generally have softer bras and since there nipples dont get irritated by constant exposure to fabrics they become more sensitive, while women with larger breast have bras with less stuffing and therefore there niples are exposed to more agitation and become less sensitive. She also told me that she barely could use shirts if she hadnt a bra on because it hurt like hell for a while, but also that after a week or two she wouldnt be so sensitive any longer and didnt need to use a bra to protect her nipples, and ive learned that the reason men generelly have less sensitive nipples is the simple fact, we have no bras at all and therefore our nipples constantly are exposed to stimulation by shirts and other clothingitems and we lose much of our sensetivity in that region. And ofcourse, some people are just more sensitive then others.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 5:39 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Had a discussion about nipples with a ex of mine once. And what I learned from that discussion is that people with small breast (like she had) generally have softer bras and since there nipples dont get irritated by constant exposure to fabrics they become more sensitive, while women with larger breast have bras with less stuffing and therefore there niples are exposed to more agitation and become less sensitive. She also told me that she barely could use shirts if she hadnt a bra on because it hurt like hell for a while, but also that after a week or two she wouldnt be so sensitive any longer and didnt need to use a bra to protect her nipples, and ive learned that the reason men generelly have less sensitive nipples is the simple fact, we have no bras at all and therefore our nipples constantly are exposed to stimulation by shirts and other clothingitems and we lose much of our sensetivity in that region. And ofcourse, some people are just more sensitive then others.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 5:39 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Had a discussion about nipples with a ex of mine once. And what I learned from that discussion is that people with small breast (like she had) generally have softer bras and since there nipples dont get irritated by constant exposure to fabrics they become more sensitive, while women with larger breast have bras with less stuffing and therefore there niples are exposed to more agitation and become less sensitive. She also told me that she barely could use shirts if she hadnt a bra on because it hurt like hell for a while, but also that after a week or two she wouldnt be so sensitive any longer and didnt need to use a bra to protect her nipples, and ive learned that the reason men generelly have less sensitive nipples is the simple fact, we have no bras at all and therefore our nipples constantly are exposed to stimulation by shirts and other clothingitems and we lose much of our sensetivity in that region. And ofcourse, some people are just more sensitive then others.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 5:39 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Had a discussion about nipples with a ex of mine once. And what I learned from that discussion is that people with small breast (like she had) generally have softer bras and since there nipples dont get irritated by constant exposure to fabrics they become more sensitive, while women with larger breast have bras with less stuffing and therefore there niples are exposed to more agitation and become less sensitive. She also told me that she barely could use shirts if she hadnt a bra on because it hurt like hell for a while, but also that after a week or two she wouldnt be so sensitive any longer and didnt need to use a bra to protect her nipples, and ive learned that the reason men generelly have less sensitive nipples is the simple fact, we have no bras at all and therefore our nipples constantly are exposed to stimulation by shirts and other clothingitems and we lose much of our sensetivity in that region. And ofcourse, some people are just more sensitive then others.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 6:34 PM

LYSANDER


Vinterdraken and Phoenixrose,
Thank you both for your insight into my question. It's funny how no matter what yo ask, people will honestly respond.

So, are there any other people with questions or comments? Look forward to hearing from all of you. Thanks for the thread Tristan.

Simon: What if he(Mal) tells you to kill me.
Zoe: (without hesitation) I kill you.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 6:59 PM

SAMEERTIA


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
Here's another one:
For those of you either married or in a serious relationship; what is the most important aspect of a happy marriage/relationship?

I am going with trust.

Holding until you get back, Captain.




Communication.
Trust hast to be built, has to be earned. Honesty has come before trust, but THAT still has to be communicated.

Funny, I moved 300 miles away from my primary partner, and VOILA! We're communicating like never before! It's fabulous. We were at a party last weekend and our friends were telling us how envious they are of how great our relationship is and how well we seem to communicate. We both said, "It's soo much work! But so so worth it!"

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 7:19 PM

RHYIANAN


Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:

Questions for women:
Look at your wardrobe. How many articles of clothing do you have that hug your ass and thighs? How many shorts come above mid thigh? How many tops "accentuate" the area that they cover? WHY? That stuff CANNOT be comfortable.

On a related subject, makeup: You look better without it, and even if you don't, oh well. Why do you spend any amount of time trying to put on a fake face?



First, I like wearing clothes like that because I feel good in them, and I find them more comfortable than clothes that are baggy (but that's just me). Also, if you compare modern women's clothing to clothing of other eras (corsets, hoop skirts, bustles, ect.) then modern clothes are more comfortable than what were worn in the past.

Secondly, I agree with the makeup thing, I rarely if ever wear it, almost only in situations where I'll be under bright lights. However, I've found that putting on makeup helps me calm down when I'm angry (don't ask why, I haven't the slightest clue).

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 7:22 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by Vinterdraken:
Had a discussion about nipples with a ex of mine once. And what I learned from that discussion is that people with small breast (like she had) generally have softer bras and since there nipples dont get irritated by constant exposure to fabrics they become more sensitive, while women with larger breast have bras with less stuffing and therefore there niples are exposed to more agitation and become less sensitive.


I'm sorry, but that's a little ridiculous. If your bra fits, it won't rub your nipples. From my experience wearing A's, B's and C's, it's actually easier to find bras that fit nice and snug when you're a little more well endowed. When I frist started to develop, my bras never fit right, now they fit fine and there's no excess stimulation. Most women have trouble finding the perfect bra since we're all shaped a little differently, but they do exist because the companies that make them know we're all shaped differently. It's just a matter of hunting around. Of course there's still the mind over matter factor in it; if you're nervous, stimulation doesn't feel as good and sensitivity might go up or down depending on your natural state of being. I'll restate that I can be painfully sensitive, but once I relax, that sensitivity is just... nice. An advantage, even. That's why easing into anything physical is pretty important.
It's interesting, too, to hear that so many men aren't sensitive or don't like to be stimulated that way. I have yet to find a man who doesn't turn to pudding if you brush/kiss his nipples correctly, though I did meet one who claimed he'd gotten them pierced in order to "wake up" the nerves. Weird. I thought it tended to kill more nerves than it woke up, but I guess it worked for him.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 7:26 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by Rhyianan:
Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:

Questions for women:
Look at your wardrobe. How many articles of clothing do you have that hug your ass and thighs? How many shorts come above mid thigh? How many tops "accentuate" the area that they cover? WHY? That stuff CANNOT be comfortable.

On a related subject, makeup: You look better without it, and even if you don't, oh well. Why do you spend any amount of time trying to put on a fake face?



First, I like wearing clothes like that because I feel good in them, and I find them more comfortable than clothes that are baggy (but that's just me). Also, if you compare modern women's clothing to clothing of other eras (corsets, hoop skirts, bustles, ect.) then modern clothes are more comfortable than what were worn in the past.

Secondly, I agree with the makeup thing, I rarely if ever wear it, almost only in situations where I'll be under bright lights. However, I've found that putting on makeup helps me calm down when I'm angry (don't ask why, I haven't the slightest clue).


Ah, I forgot those points. I like tighter clothes because they support the girls, and yeah, they make me feel good. Clothing doesn't have to be uncomfortably tight to hug the form.
I haven't worn makeup for years. I used to, but I got tired of it. It's easier not to worry, and I've never had a guy tell me I looked bad without it.
I understand how it could be calming, though. It's kinda precise work. I get the same effect from sewing.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 8:21 PM

SASSALICIOUS


Absolute first thing? Whether or not he's closer to my mom's age than mine. I'll confess, when it comes to relationships I'm a bit of an age-ist. And height-ist. Sometimes it sucks being sort of tall.

Following this, the "first thing" I look for is personality/fun-ness/spontaneity/ and some modicum of intelligence.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 8:32 PM

SASSALICIOUS


No, I wouldn't be unattracted, but I'm arguably a bit of a geek myself and also have a high IQ.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 9:04 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD


Quote:

First, I like wearing clothes like that because I feel good in them, and I find them more comfortable than clothes that are baggy (but that's just me). Also, if you compare modern women's clothing to clothing of other eras (corsets, hoop skirts, bustles, ect.) then modern clothes are more comfortable than what were worn in the past.


What do you mean you "feel good" in them? Placing that phrase as a prelude to them being more comfortable (which I also find almost impossible to believe, but, ok.) would suggest that you meant "feeling good" in them was different than them being comfortable. So what makes you "feel good" in them?

I believe this is the core of the issue, because whether or not females wish to admit it, they like the attention it gets them. Of course, when you have guys who would get into a car accident just to get a second glance at you, I'm sure it does wonders for your ego. But assuming this is the case (and I AM assuming that) I have to ask, are you unable to draw a distinction between positive attention and negative attention? It's like those trouble makers in high school and middle school environments, not caring if they get detention as long as they turn heads. Well guess what the negative side to wearing those clothes is? A lot, if not most, guys take it as a sign that you're "open for business" so to speak. Oh sure, just say no, right? There's a reason I can't turn on the freggin radio or TV any day of the week and NOT hear about some girl getting raped, and this is one of those reasons.

Modesty is a far greater virtue than being aesthetically pleasing.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 9:15 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Chrismoorehead:
Wearing form fitting clothing and dressing like a whore are two very different things. And it is incredibly insensitive to say that women invite being raped by how they dress. Have you ever known a rape victim? Do you know what happens to their spirit and their psyche when something like that happens to them? And do you have any idea how difficult it is to get them past the idea that it was their fault? Any girl I have ever known that got raped was not dressed in any particular way, nor casting any lures. Rape is, as far as I'm concerned, a by-product of testosterone poisoning, it is one of the most hideous things that happens in our world, and it has been happening for hundreds if not thousands of years! A low-cut top or tight pair of jeans have nothing to do with being attacked. Do you think they had those centuries ago? Do you think rapists really select their victims that way? Don't ever, ever say that a woman invites being raped again! Rape is no one's fault but the attackers themselves, it is inexcusible, and I will bring the wrath of Vera down on anyone who says otherwise!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 9:22 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD


Quote:

Bad boys:

Love 'em. This is frankly because, in my limited experience, they are better in bed. I don't need a man to support me or be a father to my children. I can take care of fixin' things or have the means to pay to have them fixed. So they only thing I need a man for is sex. Nice guys are just too nice for the kind of sex I like - even when I tell them exactly what I want. (Please, don't e-mail me any offers - I'm happy with what I have right now!)



If nothing, at least you're honest. That aside... what the hell? People should never be this comfortable with sex. You know what sex is akin to? Killing. You do them both for the propagation of the species and continuation of your line. It is despicable that anyone is comfortable with this.

Sometime in the future, this country will crumble like every country before it. Not a doomsday prophecy, just a fact, no government last forever. When it does, people who over-indulge will DIE OUT. You will watch your families and loved ones die in front of you and then you will follow because you do not take the time to understand and appreciate life on a thinner line, because you lack the discipline necessary to survive... ok, I know this is seeming really irrelevant right now, so I'll try to sum it up. Why is it that every time a group of individuals endures the shittiest times known to man and drag their people through the dirt and mud to found a new place and new hope for them that only a couple of generations afterwards their own bloodlines FORGET THE LESSONS OF THEIR FOREFATHERS!? Sex, food, shelter, these things are PRIVILAGES that were paid for in blood, and yet, people selfishly abuse them. You wait and see, you have the freedom to do whatever the hell you want and I don't even think that you shouldn't be allowed to, but the more freedom you use, the higher the price is to obtain it, and one day that debt will be paid, in YOUR blood, or maybe YOUR CHILDRENS blood.

I'm spent.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 9:34 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
Quote:


If nothing, at least you're honest. That aside... what the hell? People should never be this comfortable with sex. You know what sex is akin to? Killing. You do them both for the propagation of the species and continuation of your line. It is despicable that anyone is comfortable with this.


I feel so sorry for you. I really, really feel bad for anyone who has this view of sex. It pains me to know how many people won't know real pleasure in their lives. Akin to killing? See, that's despicable. How could the physical act of love be akin to killing? How could anything so deeply spiritual be anything but beautiful? Why shouldn't we be comfortable with that? Seriously. Most of the problems I have with the world today is how very uptight and puritanical it is. Not to say that sex shouldn't be respected, but I don't think it should be hidden away and taboo either, as it's natural.
And it's a great stress reliever if you let yourself enjoy it. You should try that sometime.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 9:34 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD


Do I know any rape victims? One too many, I'm afraid, to the point I really believe at least 1/10th of women who claim to be raped these days are lying.

Now, on to the meat an potatoes. In true female fashion, you completely took what I said out of context by letting your emotions speak instead of your brain (big surprise there...). Now, for the TRUE meaning, I do not believe that anyone "deserves" to be raped or that they "invite" rape. That being the ideal, here's the reality: Men DO rape, and they DO rape selectively. More on that in a minute. IN response to the reality of the situation, you have a choice: Accept it, and react accordingly, or ignore it and be at greater risk for the consequences.

Now, back to the selective raping issue. Yes, if you're showing more skin, or more curvature, men are more attracted to you. Admit it, that's the reason you do it in the first place. Now, a man who would rape and a man who wouldn't are two different creatures, IE: If he's the type that would rape a woman, he's going to do it given the opportunity and situation, if he's not, then no opportunity presented could make him. What makes women more of a likely target for the former is things that make them stand out. Skin, tight clothes, etc., and of course to varying degrees. Trust me, this is how the mind of a man works. Tattoo on the lower back? They call it the "tramp stamp". Mouth piercing? "Enter Here" sign. I don't LIKE these things anymore than you, but it is the sad condition of our reality.

Now, I'm not saying you "shouldn't" do these things, but if you want to be smart.. well, hey, it's up to you. Me? I carry first aid supplies 24/7, 25 ft of 550 parachute cord, a lighter, Leatherman multi-tool, I got a gas mask in the back seat of my car... call me paranoid. I just don't see the sense in not being prepared and in CHOOSING to remain ignorant of your surroundings.

Have you ever:
Used your teeth as wire strippers?
Given yourself stitches?
Made improvised munitions with no base supplies?
Pissed in a canteen?
Gone a month without bathing?

If so, you MIGHT just be a !HOOAH MOTHERF*CKER!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 9:47 PM

ZOOT


Quote:

Originally posted by EmmaRigby:
Hhhm! Okay, Is the old wive's tale about the relationship between the size of a guy's feet and his penis really true? Ditto for the one about the size of his nose? 'Cos that would be really handy advertisement (not that these things matter of course )



Okay - I know this was posted a while ago but I only just read it...

I pride myself on my role as "internet researcher extraordinaire" and in such guise would like it noted that it's taken me 30 seconds to find this (a personal best - woo hoo)!

http://www.snopes.com/risque/penile/size.htm

I LOVE that someone took the time to resolve this one “scientifically” – can you get a grant for that?


***************************************

Okay, I'm lost, I'm angry, and I'm
armed.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 9:51 PM

WILDIGSTART


What the hell?

Two things...first, speaking as someone that has been there: clothes have nothing to do with rape. It's a violent assault. It has nothing to do with sex. It's all about power.

Secondly, we can damn well have sex with whomever, whenever, however often we want. Do I think we as a society take sex too casually? Yes. Do i think it should be regulated to only procreation? No. There is a respectable medium in there.



back on topic...Men, why do you always rent the 'Uncut Version' of a move? It's not the director's cut or a some artsy re-edit...it's just tits and ass. Does it rally make the movie better?




You see? She's not a junkie or mentally ill, she's gifted!--Momma Roxy

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 10:01 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD


Quote:

Secondly, we can damn well have sex with whomever, whenever, however often we want. Do I think we as a society take sex too casually? Yes. Do i think it should be regulated to only procreation? No. There is a respectable medium in there.


I don't ever recall saying that you couldn't, or that I thought you shouldn't. In fact, I recall implying the opposite, that these things are your rights and freedoms. The problem is that ovindulgence in them... well, scroll up. I wouldn't even vote against these things being "legal" because I think they're matters of SELF CONTROL. You don't NEED to have it, but I think you're going to lead the country into oblivion without it. Thanks for that, by the way.

As to the rape being a "violent crime" thing... my gosh, I remember hearing Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew blast this issue on Loveline. "Raping someone is just like if I hit you in the back of the head.. and them cummed.". Doesn't make sense, does it? If they were JUST looking for control, they'd find other ways of exerting it, but a man raping a woman has a hard on for a reason. I'm not saying the element of control isn't there, but to suggest that the act is totally devoid of sexual impulsion is just ignorant.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 10:13 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
Do I know any rape victims? One too many, I'm afraid, to the point I really believe at least 1/10th of women who claim to be raped these days are lying.

Now, on to the meat an potatoes. In true female fashion, you completely took what I said out of context by letting your emotions speak instead of your brain (big surprise there...). Now, for the TRUE meaning, I do not believe that anyone "deserves" to be raped or that they "invite" rape. That being the ideal, here's the reality: Men DO rape, and they DO rape selectively. More on that in a minute. IN response to the reality of the situation, you have a choice: Accept it, and react accordingly, or ignore it and be at greater risk for the consequences.

Now, back to the selective raping issue. Yes, if you're showing more skin, or more curvature, men are more attracted to you. Admit it, that's the reason you do it in the first place. Now, a man who would rape and a man who wouldn't are two different creatures, IE: If he's the type that would rape a woman, he's going to do it given the opportunity and situation, if he's not, then no opportunity presented could make him. What makes women more of a likely target for the former is things that make them stand out. Skin, tight clothes, etc., and of course to varying degrees. Trust me, this is how the mind of a man works. Tattoo on the lower back? They call it the "tramp stamp". Mouth piercing? "Enter Here" sign. I don't LIKE these things anymore than you, but it is the sad condition of our reality.


You are all kinds of wrong for all kinds of reasons. You are not only showing the red flags of a true sexist, you are also speaking from a place of ignorance.
1) There is a vast percentage of women who never admit to being raped, because they think it is their fault. How do I know? The phrase "I've never told anyone this before" is a pretty big hint. Saying that you don't believe they're all telling the truth speaks of your own insensitivity and also counters your own statement about accepting reality and acting accordingly.
2) Women of all shapes, sizes, and dress codes are raped. Every day. It's brushed off or ignored far too often. Too many people say it's because of this that or the other, be it how a woman was dressed or the fact that she went to a bar. It is not a topic that should be treated that way. It is not only a thing driven by lust, but power. More power than anything else. If it was only lusting after the body it might be simpler than it is, but it's also lust for power and domination, and any victim will do.
3) Yes, I'm going to respond from emotions on an emotional topic. But I also have a brain and I have applied it to this situation because it is emotional for me. I have seen too many scars to ignore it, and I think it should stop, therefore I apply my brain. Don't belittle me for having emotions about something you're obviously cold about.
4) It has been proven that what makes women likely targets is how they behave. Women who act more timid, slouch, carry themselves like victims, they are the ones most likely to be attacked. The nature of the attack doesn't matter; from muggers to rapists, they are all predators and they look for weak prey. A pierced, tattooed, sexy woman wearing nothing but leather probably won't draw the average attacker if she's also riding a motorcycle and wearing brass knuckles. She's not an easy mark. A woman wearing a sweater and no makeup who takes tiny little steps, slouches, and looks around her constantly in fear is more likely to be attacked.
Caution is of course advisable. Don't take drinks from strangers, don't go home with strangers, don't walk down dark alleys at night, etc. A lot of avoiding attack is just fon du la, the art of not being there. If you put yourself in a bad situation, bad things might happen. Doesn't matter what you're wearing. Being too timid and modest can get you into more trouble that being attractive.
I like to think I'm attractive, and I have no problems with my body. I don't wear next to nothing, but there's nothing wrong with showing a little leg or a little cleavage. I have never been attacked or touched in any way I didn't want to be, or had any problems at all because I do not act like weak prey and I practice fon du la. If a situation makes me uncomfortable, I extract myself. I avoid places where bad things are likely to happen. I see no reason to hide my body out of fear. Fear kills, and there's enough of it in our culture as it is.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 10:17 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by wildigstart:
What the hell?

Two things...first, speaking as someone that has been there: clothes have nothing to do with rape. It's a violent assault. It has nothing to do with sex. It's all about power.

Secondly, we can damn well have sex with whomever, whenever, however often we want. Do I think we as a society take sex too casually? Yes. Do i think it should be regulated to only procreation? No. There is a respectable medium in there.



Yes, what she said.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 10:23 PM

EMMARIGBY


Oh dear, I was enjoying this thread! A little light hearted banter about the differences between the sexes. Now I find it's been taken over by a very scary man who's ideas are drastically opposed to my own world view! His rather angry posts have left me thinking that he would prefer all women to stay at home and cover themselves with burlap! (Yes, I know that's not what he actually said but it is definately the impression he left me with!)

Since this is not the sort of person I would choose to spend time with, I'm ofski! See all of you guys in a week when I get back!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 10:24 PM

RHYIANAN


Chris: Yes, I do mean that I psychologically feel better while dressing in a way that flatters my figure. Considering that I have never had anyone attracted to me because of how I dress (i.e. no guys checking me out, nobody hitting on me) I highly doubt that the way I feel is connected to the nonexistant attention I recieve (although I'm sure you'll disagree).
Also, it is possible to dress modestly and still wear clothes that compliment my body (which is probably why I've never experienced any attention).

As for the rape thing, contrary to popular belief, rape is not usually about the sex, it's about the power. The rapist wants to feel powerful by taking advantage of someone weaker. I agree that a woman has to be careful, but the way someone dresses is not entirely the reason the victim is selected.



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Thursday, May 4, 2006 10:30 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by ChrisMoorhead:
I don't ever recall saying that you couldn't, or that I thought you shouldn't. In fact, I recall implying the opposite, that these things are your rights and freedoms. The problem is that ovindulgence in them... well, scroll up. I wouldn't even vote against these things being "legal" because I think they're matters of SELF CONTROL. You don't NEED to have it, but I think you're going to lead the country into oblivion without it. Thanks for that, by the way.

As to the rape being a "violent crime" thing... my gosh, I remember hearing Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew blast this issue on Loveline. "Raping someone is just like if I hit you in the back of the head.. and them cummed.". Doesn't make sense, does it? If they were JUST looking for control, they'd find other ways of exerting it, but a man raping a woman has a hard on for a reason. I'm not saying the element of control isn't there, but to suggest that the act is totally devoid of sexual impulsion is just ignorant.


Considering yu've deeply offended several women here, maybe you should carefully examine what you said before you say "I didn't say that".
And for the record, Dr Drew is a dumbass and Adam Carolla is even moreso. Their show is more entertainment than substance. While Dr Drew is a doctor and knows what he's talking about medically, he really doesn't know much about sex or psychology. He has given so many wrong answers and wrong information when it comes to orgasms, bisexuality, and motivation that I'm amazed anyone would take him seriously.
A rapist has a hard-on for a reason, huh? Never occured to you that people like that are aroused by violence, now did it? Of course there are other ways to be powerful and dominant, but are any of them so effective? No other violence can scar a person's soul the way I've seen rape do. It is power, it is the ultimate violation, and it is violence. Those people are sick in the head and what someone wears does not affect their disease.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 10:33 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by EmmaRigby:
Oh dear, I was enjoying this thread! A little light hearted banter about the differences between the sexes. Now I find it's been taken over by a very scary man who's ideas are drastically opposed to my own world view! His rather angry posts have left me thinking that he would prefer all women to stay at home and cover themselves with burlap! (Yes, I know that's not what he actually said but it is definately the impression he left me with!)

Since this is not the sort of person I would choose to spend time with, I'm ofski! See all of you guys in a week when I get back!


You have a good point and are a very wise woman. I've probably said all I could on the subject and it's all going over his head anyway so perhaps I should be offski as well.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 10:42 PM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


For the record, I don't get the "Uncut Version" of a movie for more tits and ass. Granted, more often than not its in there, but such is not always the case.

Plus, I happen to like tits and ass!

For an example, how about the uncut version of The 40 Year Old Virgin. There were 17, I believe minutes of extra footage in the movie. It can't all be tits and ass. It just seems that lately, the words "Uncut" are synomynous with "Director's Cut" if your movie happened to be a bawdy comedy.

Also: See paragraph 2.

Edit: Oh dear...having read some more of what's going on here, I'll return and throw some more in.



Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:09 PM

AERIN


Tristan, you created an excellent thread, and I'll keep my eye out for any others you start. Although I was initially eager to add my questions/comments, I think I'm going to join the other ladies and go elsewhere. Call it my way of ignoring a troll who says women get raped because they ask for it.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:09 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD


So many things to address. Of course there would be, you don’t take something sensitive like this, approach it insensitively, and expect it not to result in heated discussion.

But in a nutshell, and to no one in particular, I make these points:

1) I am more than willing accept that clothes are not the only, and not even the major, factor in a woman getting raped. It is however a contributor to the fact, and the women that I do know who were raped were liberally outfitted on those occurrences. It is in a great deal relative to their attitudes at the time as well, IE: Dress slutty, act slutty, but men see with their eyes, and the first thing they’ll go after is what APPEARS to be easy.

The girl in Aruba. Known by friend and family to be the exact opposite of “timid” and “modest”. So un-timid and un-modest that she didn’t mind going home with a group of strangers. Yes, she put herself in a bad situation. Rewind to earlier that evening. See it from the group of guy’s perspective. “Hot blonde on Spring Break wearing tight clothes. Easy mark.”. The first rule of war is to know thine enemy. See things from his perspective.

2) My personal feelings of the issue, that women lie about being raped, were not factored anywhere into my argument of why they are raped. Maybe because I have the good sense to separate what I see from what I think.

3) I will re-itterate my intolerance for rapists just one more time. I AM PUTTING THIS IN BOLD SO THAT ANYONE WHO MISQUOTES ME AS SAYING "WOMEN DESERVE TO BE RAPED" WILL BE PROPERLY IDENTIFIED AS EITHER PARTIALLY BLIND OR COMPLETLEY RETARDED. I do not brush off any rapes with comments like “She had it coming”, nor would even the most conservative of my friends. I have never ONCE seen a rape “brushed off” by anyone, I have ALWAYS seen it treated with the utmost care and concern even when factual evidence was lacking.

Case in point: The lacrosse team vs. the stripper. National example: Women DO lie about it. Even if she wasn’t this time, she definitely had in the past (I’m not assuming, either, do some freggin research and look it up.). This does no excuse anyone doing it to her again in the future, but with all of this in mind: STOP ACTING LIKE THE WORLD OWES YOUR GENDER PITY.

4) I’ve already addressed the rape being about power issue. Nothing anyone has said addresses why someone would choose sex over any number of other ways to exert power. Kidnapping, torturing, chaining, binding… these things are about power. Raping no doubt has power involved in it, but I will re-itterate that anyone who thinks it’s totally devoid of sexual impulsion is plain ignorant. If there weren’t sexual impulsion involved, it would not be acted out sexually. If it was, there’d be a whole lot more guys fucking each other in the ass instead of beating the crap out of one another to prove dominance.

5) I’m an admitted sexist. But only because of the attitude that women take these days. Like every other minority, they seem to think that theirs are the truly important issues of the time, that as victims of rape they should be pitied and left un-offended by all. Screw that, you’re human and you’re going to be subject to the same abuse as everyone else. Men get raped in prison all the time. Don’t see too many articles about that, do you? No, actually, I seem to recall more jokes about it than anything else. In short: Get over yourselves. Bad shit happens to everyone.

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:50 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Never worn a bra, so cant really argue against you. Can just reaccount for what she said when we had that discussion.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:50 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Never worn a bra, so cant really argue against you. Can just reaccount for what she said when we had that discussion.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:50 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Never worn a bra, so cant really argue against you. Can just reaccount for what she said when we had that discussion.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:50 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Never worn a bra, so cant really argue against you. Can just reaccount for what she said when we had that discussion.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:50 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Never worn a bra, so cant really argue against you. Can just reaccount for what she said when we had that discussion.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Thursday, May 4, 2006 11:50 PM

VINTERDRAKEN


Never worn a bra, so cant really argue against you. Can just reaccount for what she said when we had that discussion.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Friday, May 5, 2006 12:42 AM

MANWITHPEZ

Important people don't do field work.


QUOTE: 5) I’m an admitted sexist. But only because of the attitude that women take these days. Like every other minority, they seem to think that theirs are the truly important issues of the time, that as victims of rape they should be pitied and left un-offended by all. Screw that, you’re human and you’re going to be subject to the same abuse as everyone else. Men get raped in prison all the time. Don’t see too many articles about that, do you? No, actually, I seem to recall more jokes about it than anything else. In short: Get over yourselves. Bad shit happens to everyone. END QUOTE


Okay, okay, okay...I've been reading this for some time, and I think it's time to say something. Are you honestly...HONESTLY telling rape victims to "get over yourselves"? Yes, bad shit happens to everyone, but...come on...I'd say if it's rape, it's pretty fucking bad.

Rape is a form of assault. But, there's so much more involved than the beating of an individual physically. I'm not saying that the psychological effects of assault and rape are that far removed from each other. Powerlessness and self worth issues abound. But, when you're beaten, you heal, and you move on. It is not the kind of thing that sticks in your head and rebounds. I imagine if you looked at the suicide statistics for people post these crimes, you'd see that rape victims are much more succeptible.

I understand that men get raped in prison all the time. Are you telling me that crimes of social interaction amongst convicts locked away from civilization compare? Not only are you generalizing women in this mess, but men as well. Rapists rape. Real men do not. So, before you post something saying that "Men rape" ...think. And, I don't seem to see a whole lot of that going on here.

This was a fun thread. It's no longer. Yes, women lie about being raped sometimes. However, rapists lie about raping a whole lot more, I'd wager.

You have your world view, and I can tell it's not going to be changed. That's your business, of course, but, some of the things you've been saying are toxic, in the extreme, and unnecessary.

I'll be back when I've calmed down a bit.

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

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Friday, May 5, 2006 12:48 AM

SPOOTY


ok

Why do the majority of women all seem to pick up on and prefer good traits like intelligence, attitude and personality (even when attributed to a handsome male) yet always choose the complete knuckle-head loser that treats you like a pile of go-se?

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Friday, May 5, 2006 12:59 AM

NUCLEARDAY


Quote:

Originally posted by wildigstart:
back on topic...Men, why do you always rent the 'Uncut Version' of a move? It's not the director's cut or a some artsy re-edit...it's just tits and ass. Does it rally make the movie better?


Do tits and ass really make a movie better??? How could it not??? :) It's not like I'll see a movie just because of the T&A (oh, wait: yes, yes I will...) Well, it's not like I won't see a movie because it doesn't... But a little extra for the menfolk is just icing on the cake if it's a good movie. (And as good a reason as any to see a bad one.) And I'm comfortable enough with my manhood that I'm not opposed to some man-butt or something in a movie, for the ladies.

@the topic of our culture being too free with sex: Addiction, and too much of anything is generally bad. Same with sex. Me: I don't do the casual sex thing, people who know me in RL are sometimes suprised by that, as I come off a bit free-spirited. But someone else's choice is no business of mine. (And I have my share of fetishes and kinks as well.)

My problem is the idea that sex or the human form is supposed to be something dirty, or shameful. I don't hold much to the idea that sex should be just for procreation, either. Alot of my hangups earlier in life, and the cause of much drama in my relationships, was me getting used to the idea that sex isn't quite the terribly big deal everyone makes it out to be. (Let's just say that I can really relate to what'shisname from Jaynestown :) Anyways, I'm writing this after a long day of work, so maybe that all doesn't make sense, and I'll stop before I start writing a whole novel here :P

Also, let me just say, that while I think sex isn't that big a deal: there's still the matter of responsibility, respect, and the addendum that it really should only involve two (or more) relatively mature and consenting adults. After that, though... frell, have fun!

________________________________________________
You can take my hope when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers. (Or if Kaylee asks me nicely...)

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Friday, May 5, 2006 1:07 AM

MAMASAID


I am smart, and I would find a guy smarter than me unattractive not because he is a nerd or anything, but I wouldn't want stiff competition in life. Have been that way for a while...

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Friday, May 5, 2006 1:25 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by nuclearday:
Addiction, and too much of anything is generally bad. Same with sex. Me: I don't do the casual sex thing, people who know me in RL are sometimes suprised by that, as I come off a bit free-spirited. But someone else's choice is no business of mine. (And I have my share of fetishes and kinks as well.)

My problem is the idea that sex or the human form is supposed to be something dirty, or shameful. I don't hold much to the idea that sex should be just for procreation, either. Alot of my hangups earlier in life, and the cause of much drama in my relationships, was me getting used to the idea that sex isn't quite the terribly big deal everyone makes it out to be. (Let's just say that I can really relate to what'shitname from Jaynestown :) Anyways, I'm writing this after a long day of work, so maybe that all doesn't make sense, and I'll stop before I start writing a whole novel here :P

Also, let me just say, that while I think sex isn't that big a deal: there's still the matter of responsibility, respect, and the addendum that it really should only involve two (or more) relatively mature and consenting adults. After that, though... frell, have fun!


You sum up my views rather well. Though I do think sex is a deal, just not in the uptight way. Rather, I think it should be special. Is special. And fun. Hence, yeah, casual sex is for no. It's funny, people tend to be surprised at me having that attitude as well. And if they don't know me well, they tend to forget. When did "open minded and free spirited" become the same as "I will jump anything that's willing"?

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

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Friday, May 5, 2006 1:25 AM

MAMASAID


I do agree that people dismiss the sexual aspect of rape out of hand and attribute it to power. It's mostly a power issue, but sex is involved. And I think Chris' estimation of 1/10 of women claiming, etc. is too high. Women would never like to admit being raped.

And I think a differentiation between strager rape and acquantance rape would be in order, as they often have different motives. The latter is definitely more common, around 82% of rape cases.

Also, I will disagree with Chris about the skank factor: its usually modest girls raped, even acquaintace rape. I took rape counseling training and we heard all the stats. To be sure, you can also take stats with a grain of salt.

Also, we as a people do need to have a better sense of humor about things. Yes, it takes healing time to get over a rape: psychaitrist, family conversations. All fine. But, eventually that comes to an end. I had a life threatening disease as a teen and will probably have a relaspe be the time I'm 30 with the medication i'm on. But hey, cancer can be funny damnit. If I took myself too seriously, life would suck. I think everything is open for parody. I like the south park thing: "its been 21.3 years! AIDS is finally funny!"

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Friday, May 5, 2006 2:44 AM

SUNSHINEGAL


Quote:

Originally posted by manwithpez:
QUOTE: 5) I’m an admitted sexist. But only because of the attitude that women take these days. Like every other minority, they seem to think that theirs are the truly important issues of the time, that as victims of rape they should be pitied and left un-offended by all. Screw that, you’re human and you’re going to be subject to the same abuse as everyone else. Men get raped in prison all the time. Don’t see too many articles about that, do you? No, actually, I seem to recall more jokes about it than anything else. In short: Get over yourselves. Bad shit happens to everyone. END QUOTE


Okay, okay, okay...I've been reading this for some time, and I think it's time to say something. Are you honestly...HONESTLY telling rape victims to "get over yourselves"? Yes, bad shit happens to everyone, but...come on...I'd say if it's rape, it's pretty fucking bad.

Rape is a form of assault. But, there's so much more involved than the beating of an individual physically. I'm not saying that the psychological effects of assault and rape are that far removed from each other. Powerlessness and self worth issues abound. But, when you're beaten, you heal, and you move on. It is not the kind of thing that sticks in your head and rebounds. I imagine if you looked at the suicide statistics for people post these crimes, you'd see that rape victims are much more succeptible.

I understand that men get raped in prison all the time. Are you telling me that crimes of social interaction amongst convicts locked away from civilization compare? Not only are you generalizing women in this mess, but men as well. Rapists rape. Real men do not. So, before you post something saying that "Men rape" ...think. And, I don't seem to see a whole lot of that going on here.

This was a fun thread. It's no longer. Yes, women lie about being raped sometimes. However, rapists lie about raping a whole lot more, I'd wager.

You have your world view, and I can tell it's not going to be changed. That's your business, of course, but, some of the things you've been saying are toxic, in the extreme, and unnecessary.

I'll be back when I've calmed down a bit.

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."


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Friday, May 5, 2006 2:47 AM

SUNSHINEGAL


Last time I checked one can avoid being put in the situation of imprisonment. Usually by NOT committing the CRIME that landed them there in the first place! You compare that to the rape of a woman walking home from work/school etc.?
Admitted sexist? Sounds, to me, more like and unacknowledged rapest in the making.




I call her Vera.

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Friday, May 5, 2006 2:51 AM

DEEPGIRL187


Wuh de tyen, ah!

What happened here? The last time I checked this thread, everything was so peaceful.

At last.
We can retire and give up
this life of crime.

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Friday, May 5, 2006 3:09 AM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by deepgirl187:
Wuh de tyen, ah!

What happened here? The last time I checked this thread, everything was so peaceful.

At last.
We can retire and give up
this life of crime.



Sssh! Be very very quiet! We're all hiding from the bad man!

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Friday, May 5, 2006 3:11 AM

TRISTAN


To all, I apologize. I started this thread with the intention of light banter and better understanding, and it gets hi-jacked. That'll teach me to go to bed and leave a thread alone.

I may try to start something else like this again, but we'll see.

I enjoyed all the insights posted, and have learned a few things.

Thank you all.

Holding until you get back, Captain.

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Friday, May 5, 2006 3:22 AM

PERSEPHONE736


I was enjoying reading the posts too. Nice thread Tristan (up until the take-over of course)!

Link to current Firefly Fit Club weekly thread:
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=11&t=20301
Link to original Firefly Fit Club thread:
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=18971

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