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Science Rules Vampires a Mathematical Impossibility

POSTED BY: CYBERSNARK
UPDATED: Thursday, December 28, 2006 01:30
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Thursday, October 26, 2006 7:30 AM

CYBERSNARK


http://news.yahoo.com/s/space/20061025/sc_space/vampiresamathematicali
mpossibilityscientistsays


Quote:

University of Central Florida physics professor Costas Efthimiou's work debunks pseudoscientific ideas, such as vampires and zombies, in an attempt to enhance public literacy. Not only does the public believe in such topics, but the percentages are at dangerously high level, Efthimiou told LiveScience.
Oy vey. What exactly does belief in the occult have to do with illiteracy? And why is this belief considered "dangerous?"



Quote:

Efthimiou's debunking logic: On Jan 1, 1600, the human population was 536,870,911. If the first vampire came into existence that day and bit one person a month, there would have been two vampires by Feb. 1, 1600. A month later there would have been four, and so on. In just two-and-a-half years the original human population would all have become vampires with nobody left to feed on.

If mortality rates were taken into consideration, the population would disappear much faster. Even an unrealistically high reproduction rate couldn't counteract this effect.

"In the long run, humans cannot survive under these conditions, even if our population were doubling each month," Efthimiou said. "And doubling is clearly way beyond the human capacity of reproduction."

Obvious flaws (not that this textbook-thumper seems inclined to hear them): he's failing to account for victims not being turned, for vampires subsisting on animal blood, and for anything going around and killing (or at least adequately defending against) vampires.

If this is the best science can do, I think I'm better off with the spiritualists.

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

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Thursday, October 26, 2006 7:51 AM

KANEMAN


I find it rather comical that this researcher went through all that trouble and seems to seriously think that he's got it all figured out. Only to have you ask him:"what about animal blood?"..LOL..I guess it's back to the drawing board for that poor guy. I can see it now:

*Scientist hunched over calculator...Jumps up with finger extended*

Sci- "Aha..I have figured it out Watson, it is impossible for there to have ever been vampires"

Wat- "Quick sir, I'll publish the data and conclusion on the Internet before anyone else can steal your claim to fame"

Sci- "Yes!..Very good Watson, wouldn't want anyone else getting the credit, or the riches sure to come, from my months of painstakingly hard-work."

Wat- "It's uploaded sir..ha ha.. we will be rich..Sir,,,RICH!.. maybe a Nobel, sir?"

Sci- "OOOH! that hadn't crossed my min..."

Wat- "Sorry to interrupt you sir, but there is a PM coming in for you"

Sci- " Well, read it Watson!"

Wat- " It's from someone calling himself Cybersnark...Ah... sir, he wants to know if you considered in you calculations whether or not Vampires could live on animal blood?"

Sci- " I..I..ah...awe SHIT...GOD DAMN IT!!...mother frakin bleepedy bleep......."

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Thursday, October 26, 2006 7:51 AM

DEEPGIRL187


Hear, hear. There's nothing worse than a poorly researched theory.

*************************************************

"So long and goodnight."

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Thursday, October 26, 2006 8:20 AM

MILFORD


When will scientist and mathmaticians realize that there are just some things that can't be quantified?

And I heartily agree: belief in something unseen does not qualify one as illiterate or unintelligent.

There's loads of crap out there that can't be proven with numbers and measurements. To pretend otherwise is delusional.

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Leaning into the wind that used to carry me-Stavesacre

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Wednesday, November 8, 2006 6:06 AM

VAMPCHICK88


awww!!!! ruin my fun why don't you!

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Wednesday, November 8, 2006 6:30 AM

REDLAVA


THANK GOODNESS!!!!

For a while there I was scared. Now hopefully he will turn his resources onto solving that darn Werewolf and walking Mummy problem.


Everybody always has the advantage over us, but that's what makes us special...and Browncoats.

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Wednesday, November 8, 2006 6:34 AM

SIMONWHO


Scientists need to learn that you can't use logic, common sense or theories against the awesome power of the terminally stupid.

Case in point: I heard someone dismiss the Big Bang theory utterly because "if it was true, all the planets would be in jagged pieces, not round".

If people want to believe in something, for whatever reason, they will. You can't prove a negative, especially not to those who aren't listening, so don't bother trying.

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Wednesday, November 8, 2006 11:09 AM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


Obviously he was ignoring even larger supernatural threats...




"Well, here I am...Does that seem right to you?"

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Wednesday, November 8, 2006 11:55 AM

KAYNA

I love my captain


Whether you believe in Vampires or not it doesn't cahnge the fact that he's working from only on form of the vampire myth and that one of the simplests. I'v come accross versions where an exchange of blood is neccesary and versions where the "victim" must be of the opposite gender, and/or a virgin to be turned, or that they must die first. And that's only the tip of the iceberg.

Actually, my brother and his improve group, Foe Pa, made fun of this in one of their scetches. I think you could find it at www.foepa.com

And I'd like to reiterate the question from earlier. Why is believing/being interested in this stuff dangerous?

Bah! I'm getting all worked up about this. I'm not really sure why.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



Op: You're fighting a war you've already lost.
Mal: Yeah, well I'm known for that.

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Sunday, November 26, 2006 9:07 AM

MRBLUESUN


Also one of the basises of this so called scientist's theory is that the first vampire came into existence in the 1600's yet there have been reports of the nasty fanged blood sucking buggers from around the world since the dawn of human civilisation. Quite apart from the whole surviving on animal blood argument surely the vampiric population would exist parallel to the human one, and therefore undergo similar fluctuations in size. Also, surley their numbers would have severely decreased in time of great upheaval when people were going out of their way to kill 'evil', aka the spanish inquisition?
By the way what sort of scientist sits down and decides to disprove the existance of vampires? Could their time not be better spent searching for a cure for cancer?

'If nothing we do matters, then all that matters is what we do.'

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Thursday, December 28, 2006 1:30 AM

22CLAWS

Entirely pointy.


This thread is so funny.

Science: The universe's ultimate punchline.
22

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