CAPTION TIGHTPANTS is dead...

POSTED BY: TenthCrewMember
UPDATED: Thursday, April 7, 2005 23:56
VIEWED: 17132
PAGE 1 of 1

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 4:10 AM

RUE

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 4:16 AM

Nothing comes to mind at the moments - but D*MN !!! You had me going with that April Fool's joke!

THEGREYJEDI

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 4:29 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

NATHAN: So which will it be, Wheo? The Red Pill or the Blue Pill?

--------------------------------------------------------------
Chief Engineer - USS SereniTREE.
http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com
Real Fans Wait - 09/30/05

JADEHAND

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 4:42 AM

Nathan: I have to roll a what to shoot them? Ah screw it! Give the River character sheet and I'll just kill them all with my brain. mwah ha ha.

Visit WWW.Marillion.Com for a better way to live

MONTANAGIRL

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 4:49 AM

Nathan actually gets the Jedi mind trick to work and levitates his pen. Silent Bob looks on in jealousy.

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

PUMAMANREDUX

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 5:29 AM

Quote:

Nathan: "So the dice in my hand represent the treasure pile .. the bottle of water is the ancient red dragon .. the can of peanuts is the dais and the dice bag is the range of the dragon's breath weapon .. did I get that right? oh and what does this pen represent?"

**************************************

'Trust me - I know what I'm doing!' - Sledge Hammer
**************
http://www.freewebs.com/mjspages/tempfireflypage.htm

SHINY

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 6:41 AM

THAC0? Yeah, I could use a taco...this pen sure ain't helpin' my appetite any.

ZOL

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 8:08 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Nathan didn`t have time to brush his teeth, so, he picked up the nearest white object he could find & hoped nobody would notice whilst he signed autographs ...

"ou es zisss to?"

or

Alan Tudyk looks over and see Nathan & shouts "some people juggle geese you know!"

or

Nathan takes great pleasure from the juices of Jewels pen (think about it Kaylee-strawberries

cometo think about it that could be Morenas pen

Darin (Zol.)

RAT

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 8:22 AM

"One is a genius, the other's insane!"

-Ratboy

ZOOT

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 8:43 AM

Genius! and I was onyl re-watching Mallrats this weekend!! Superb cross-over joke (superb film!) . . .

Perhaps ther's some milage out of the ol' "back of a Volkswagen" joke . . .

ZOOT

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 8:45 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Rat:

"One is a genius, the other's insane!"

-Ratboy

And Animaniacs! Could this week GET any better???

ZOL

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 9:09 AM

And another one, having spotted what`s in the can

---
Nathan was asked to act Nuts! and was given a can of Planters to act to
---

and of course afterwards he was heard saying "I do the job, then I get paid" (peanuts)

Darin (Zol.)

CALIGARI

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 9:35 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Fella on the left: "If I force this pen down his throat with my mind, then he'll finally shut up about seeing Gina Torres' naked ass on the set of _Serenity_....

http://www.livejournal.com/users/tomehoarder/

SIMONWHO

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 9:35 AM

Random baseball capped dude: Er, Nathan, I think you should know, that pen has just recently been in a very uncomfortable place.

ZOOT

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 9:48 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by SimonWho:

Random baseball capped dude: Er, Nathan, I think you should know, that pen has just recently been in a very uncomfortable place.

And THANK YOU!!

KMS

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 10:16 AM

Quote:
Another great winner! Well deserved and it still has me laughing! Thanks KMS!
Thank you! I just love these! Great fun.
---KMS!

Joss (OS): Good, Nathan. Good, boy. Now bring it back. Come on, boy, bring it back.
--Joss discovers that some actors just can’t play ‘fetch’ for nothing.

Or

Other Guy (thinking): Should I tell him that isn’t faux cow poo he’s holding?

Or

Tom realizes the REAL reason Nathan doesn’t smoke, but doesn’t have the heart to tell him not to start in the middle.

Or

Water
Peanuts
Cell phone
Book
Pen
Blue Thing
Paper
Other Guy
Nathan
--Name three items that are in the Serenity movie.

Or

There is a reason that ‘Super Pantry’ didn’t get the job as caterer for the 'Serenity' movie.

Or

Nathan tries out for the staring role in 'Bewitched', but can’t seem to manage the nose twitch without a prosthetic.

Or

Nathan: Who put glue on the gorram pen??? It’s stuck to my lip! SUMMER!!!!!

Or

Other Guy (thinking): I thought it was supposed to be a big, black mustache you grew when you were evil.

Or

Bit in his mouth, emoting like a horse, Nathan practices layers and layers of acting challenges --- while Stanley looks on ---- unimpressed.

Or

Strangely, Nathan’s new cookie duster grows in pure white, revealing his true age.

Or

Trying to move the autograph line along, Nathan begins signing with his feet, hands, and teeth!

Or

Nathan loses his bid to be the new poster boy for the latest ‘Got Milk!’ campaign, when he fails to get the milk-mustache to stick to his upper lip.

KMS!
'We're not obsessed, we're focused.' --Gizzie

ZOL

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 10:20 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by KMS:
Quote:

Nathan: Who put glue on the gorram pen??? It’s stuck to my lip! SUMMER!!!!!

KMS!
'We're not obsessed, we're focused.' --Gizzie

Actually, I love this one, get`s my vote

It`s ALWAYS Summer`s fault!!

Oh gosh, maybe in for it now ... best run, I`ve seen what River can do ...

Darin (Zol.)

p.s. you can tell the quality of the actor by the quality of his pen and the way he holds it ... oh and then there`s the ink, lots of ink

EST120

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 12:45 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheGreyJedi:
NATHAN: So which will it be, Wheo? The Red Pill or the Blue Pill?

i cannot think of anything at this moment but MAN is this one funny.

STARPILOTGRAINGER

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 2:10 PM

Other guy: Okay, you hit the Reaver for 20 damage, but he's still coming.
Mal: Gorramit! I get this all day at work, I don't need it in my spare time! Now where's my lucky d20?

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions

MANWITHPEZ

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 2:30 PM

Quote:

Not funny, you bastard! Okay, it was a little funny, but my heart stopped for a second!

and, my caption:

Anonymous Guy: Yeah, shooting up with ink is supposed to keep you looking younger. I'll take the Pepsi Challenge against that Amsterdam stuff anyday of the week.

Nathan: That's a bold statement my friend. Mind if I shoot up here?

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

VETERAN

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 3:18 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:
...long live CAPTION TIGHTPANTS!

Nathan: "Now for my next trick, I will juggle this pen, a water bottle, a pair of dice, and this blue bag."

Succatash: ZZZZZZ

Nathan: "This works a lot better with goslings."

VOLSTOCK

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 3:39 PM

Joss (OS): Ogres?! Man I got a Ogre slaying knife its got a +9 against Ogres.
Nathan: You're not there, your getting drunk.
Joss (OS): OK but if theres any girls there I WANNA DO THEM!

"I've seen you with no clothes on, never thought I'd see you naked."

RYCE

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 3:51 PM

Bottle of water: $1
Can of peanuts: $2.95
Not having enough hands to play games with your fans: priceless
or
Finding out your favorite captain is as big a nerd as you are: priceless

ZOL

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 4:40 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Volstock:
Joss (OS): Ogres?! Man I got a Ogre slaying knife its got a +9 against Ogres.
Nathan: You're not there, your getting drunk.
Joss (OS): OK but if theres any girls there I WANNA DO THEM!

"I've seen you with no clothes on, never thought I'd see you naked."

hmmm, that sounds like an actual Joss quote

who are you again?

Darin (Zol.)

KAYLEE4SIMON

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 5:39 PM

The next item up for bid is... well it's not pretty folks... Nathan with a pen in his mouth.

*everyone clears the room, cricket noises are heard*

Nathan: Huh.

Keep shiny!

COSMICFUGITIVE

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 6:25 PM

[IMG] [/IMG]

Nathan attempts to break the Guinness World Record for the 'longest time spent holding a pen between your lips' category.

JADEHAND

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 6:33 PM

Zol wrote:
Wednesday, March 30, 2005 06:40
Quote:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by Volstock:
Joss (OS): Ogres?! Man I got a Ogre slaying knife its got a +9 against Ogres.
Nathan: You're not there, your getting drunk.
Joss (OS): OK but if theres any girls there I WANNA DO THEM!

"I've seen you with no clothes on, never thought I'd see you naked."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

hmmm, that sounds like an actual Joss quote who are you again?

Darin (Zol.)

Actually I think that's from an outtake on a videogame. If I remember correctly it was on Summoner for PS2, but I never played it. A friend of mine rented it and saw that. the whole thing was pretty funny if you're into role-playing and such.

Visit WWW.Marillion.Com for a better way to live

THEDUKE

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 6:59 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

(out of shot)BOOK: Isn't that the pen we used in the 2nd caption tightpants?
(to book) SIMON: yeah, don't tell him tho, he'll get mighty angered!

(oh yes, IRKRON lives on)

I know exactly what the see in me, YOU

KESSIE

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 7:08 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Nathan goes to desperate measures to scare his blinddate away. Who would have thought Maria could also be a boys name?

They say it’s the last song
They don’t know us, you see
Its only the last song
If we let it be

http://www.darknessenemyinc.de.vu/

MALICIOUS

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 8:48 PM

Nathan sees Toby McGuire in line for an autograph and tries to hit him with his own spidey-webbing.

Mal-licious

I think I will add cursing and the hurling about of things to my repertoire.

CHOLLETT

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 9:42 PM

lol. "Where are the Cheetos?" "Where's the Mountain Dew?" If i'm not mistaken, the Ogre slaying knife thing is from 8-Bit D&D, a flash cartoon on Newgrounds. Good quote.

Anywhoo, now for mine.

Nathan: "You mean this pen, this little bag, and whatever it is in my right hand is my pay for doing the movie? I thought i was getting a year's supply of cilantro!"
Man beside Nathan (thinking): "He never reads the entire contract...."

"When your miracle gets here, you just pound this button once." -Alan Tudyk, in a message to Joss with the packaged button, about the Firefly movie

LETOV

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 10:44 PM

The D&D game quotes were originally aired by Dr. Demento by "The Dead Alewives". It has since been put to flash video and goodness knows what else. Absolutely hilarious though. Its on a Dr. Demento collection or two.

Amazon has it http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B00004R7LG/qid=111222190
8/sr=8-2/ref=pd_csp_2/104-0405267-0371131?v=glance&s=music&n=507846 (not sure the link'll work) and you can listen to a few seconds of it.

edited a few minutes later -
I really need to get a life. Did a google search and found a site that has the whole thing for download
http://www.fantaseum.com/humor/showhumor.asp?rec_id=12

- Leto_V

"Well, my days of not taking you
seriously are certainly coming to
a middle." - Mal

VOLSTOCK

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 10:53 PM

Glad I got some people chatting. Yes its by the Dead Alewives but I think the funniest animated version is the summoner one.

http://www.ifilm.com/ifilmdetail/220487

Especially the monster in the kitchen "Where are the cheetos?"

"I've seen you with no clothes on, never thought I'd see you naked."

LETOV

Wednesday, March 30, 2005 10:56 PM

My goodness... I'm listening to this for the first time in years and yup... tears pouring from my eyes as I laugh. Ahhhh, memories of my youth...

- Leto_V

"Well, my days of not taking you
seriously are certainly coming to
a middle." - Mal

CYBERSNARK

Thursday, March 31, 2005 2:04 AM

There're also a few AMVs to it, though the only one that I knew of before searching just now was this one:
http://www.animemusicvideos.org/members/members_videoinfo.php?v=10636

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

JRC

Thursday, March 31, 2005 3:04 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Kessie:
Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Nathan goes to desperate measures to scare his blinddate away. Who would have thought Maria could also be a boys name?

THIS is one of the funniest quotes from any Caption tightpants ever!!!! LMAOOOOO!!!!

Everyone dies alone.

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Thursday, March 31, 2005 3:44 AM

okay, first: I love being called a bastard...really. Makes me want to perform more evilness.

second: Isn't the +9 ogre thing from that video called "The Gamers"? I know the rest was from the demento thing...or did they both have it?

third: my next attempt for a caption...

**WARNING! Engaging in comraderie with your fanbase my have unexpected creepifying results. Consult a physician before attempting any potentially risky photo ops.**

Nathan: Gorram warning labels...NOW you tell me! I was naked last week...

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Thursday, March 31, 2005 3:47 AM

Anyone seen Raiders of the Lost Ark lately? I see the guy on the right with "LOVE" and "YOU" on his eyelids

Cilantro!
TCM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In Ohio? Join us!
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JRC

Thursday, March 31, 2005 6:11 AM

Thought that was a gal..........

Everyone dies alone.

TADPOLE37

Thursday, March 31, 2005 8:24 AM

Nathan: We have the technology.....we can rebuild Serenity.

or

Other Guy: Ya know, MacGuyver would only need some gum and a paperclip to fix the cortex.

or

Nathan: Ok. I understand the water and the lock-pick kit. But how do the peanuts and pen help us crack the safe?

Other Guy: Mal, you're not thinking fourth-dimensionaly!

Nathan: I always have a problem with that.

--------------------------------------------------
"Ha ha ha. Mine is an evil laugh." -- Wash

"For evil to triumph, good men must do nothing." -- some important british guy

"Thank God for Tango Romeo Echo's." -- me

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA

Thursday, March 31, 2005 9:33 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Nathan (thinking): Wait, if I'm writing with a peanut, then what the hell am I eating?

---------------------------------------------
The real-life box droppin', man-ape gone wrong thing, now without the pesky falling boxes

EBONEZER

Thursday, March 31, 2005 5:59 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:
Anyone seen Raiders of the Lost Ark lately? I see the guy on the right with "LOVE" and "YOU" on his eyelids

*DIES* OMG! I LOVE anything Indy, that is FUNNY!

Anyway, onto mine:

Guy: Whats that your doing again?

Nathan: Its an anchient meditation technique.

Guy: And the pourpose of the pen is...

Nathan: Will you shhhh for two seconds? You're scaring off all my Zen.

(forgive my lack of spelling abilities)

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/yeabig/

PUMAMANREDUX

Friday, April 1, 2005 6:32 AM

nathan: "Can you take the thorn out of my paw ... err ... hand?"

*************************************************

'Trust me - I know what I'm doing!' - Sledge Hammer
**************
http://www.freewebs.com/mjspages/tempfireflypage.htm

RUE

Friday, April 1, 2005 6:58 AM

Nathan (muffled): ... peanuts, bottle, phone ... now where the hell did I put my pen ...?
Dude: (discrete silence)

MANWITHPEZ

Friday, April 1, 2005 2:53 PM

Quote:

Nathan: Bag, peanuts, pen...If I can assemble these into a weapon, it would be even better than SWORDCHUCKS!

Anonymous Guy: (Sarcastically) Yeah, and I'm the Black Mage! This is not 8-Bit Theater, Mr. Fillion.

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

COSMICFUGITIVE

Friday, April 1, 2005 3:18 PM

[IMG] [/IMG]

NATHAN: "AMNPHMNPHAPHMNPHAWMANPHAMNNAPHMMMMNK?"

RANDOM GUY: "Huh?"

(Nathan drops his pen into his hand)

NATHAN: "I said, 'are you sure this will cure my back ache?'"

RANDOM GUY: "Yeah, sure."

OXYOPIA

Friday, April 1, 2005 6:45 PM

In the midst of explaining the adage 'The pen is mightier than the sword', Mal looks on in surprised horror to see Jayne pull out Vera in order to test the idea...

or

In an attempt to circumvent Joss' standing orders prohibiting anyone from discussing the plot to 'Serenity', Nathan uses everyday objects and the art of mime to convey some of the film's more salient details...much to the delight of his fans

-Oxy

------------------------------------------------

'What people call impossible is just stuff they
haven't seen yet...'

------------------------------------------------

DIZ

Friday, April 1, 2005 10:25 PM

Dungeon Master in hat: You see a Dwarf lying in the mud, a sucking chest wound putting him on the edge of death. He cries to you: "Please help me!"

Nathan: I waste him with my crossbow!!!

DARKJESTER

Friday, April 1, 2005 10:36 PM

Nathan: "Well, you said you wanted to meet the real me...."

Flanboy: "Is it too late to change my mind?"

MAL "You only gotta scare him."
JAYNE "Pain is scary..."

ANOTHERFIREFLYFAN

Saturday, April 2, 2005 3:13 AM

The true reason for Firefly's cancellation was finally discovered - Nathan ate the Fox executives pens.

Keep flying

INTHEBLACK

Saturday, April 2, 2005 10:41 AM

Suddenly, Mal realised that his life as a companion would never be as glamorous as Inara's.

Shiniest gorramn show in the 'verse!

STARPILOTGRAINGER

Saturday, April 2, 2005 4:53 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Diz:
Dungeon Master in hat: You see a Dwarf lying in the mud, a sucking chest wound putting him on the edge of death. He cries to you: "Please help me!"

Nathan: I waste him with my crossbow!!!

KODT?

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions

STARPILOTGRAINGER

Saturday, April 2, 2005 11:23 PM

Nathan: I fire an arrow at it.
Other guy: Okay, now it's a gazebo with an arrow sticking out of it.
Nathan: I didn't hurt it?
Other guy: It's a gazebo!
Nathan: I drop my bow, draw my sword and strike it. Shiny! I got a natural 20! Do I kill it?
Other guy: No, you didn't. It's a gazebo.
Nathan: Gorramit! (chews on pen) What do I gotta do to kill this thing?
Other guy: It's a gazebo, man!

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions

LOSTINTHEBLACK

Sunday, April 3, 2005 12:47 AM

(out of shot D&D player): You approach the Cave of Devastation. Suddenly, a fifth level orc berserker charges you wielding a +10 Scimitar of Cleaving.
(Nathan): Okay, I'm going to need that in Captain Dummy talk.
(other guy in shot): Nathan, there's a giant, ugly monster running at you with a sword.
(Nathan): So...what are the dice for?

ANOTHERFIREFLYFAN

Sunday, April 3, 2005 3:38 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by lostintheblack:
(out of shot D&D player): You approach the Cave of Devastation. Suddenly, a fifth level orc berserker charges you wielding a +10 Scimitar of Cleaving.
(Nathan): Okay, I'm going to need that in Captain Dummy talk.
(other guy in shot): Nathan, there's a giant, ugly monster running at you with a sword.
(Nathan): So...what are the dice for?

HAhahaha! Captain dummy talk! Classic!

Keep flying

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Sunday, April 3, 2005 3:17 PM

Okay, here are the week 21 selections...but you'll have to scan back and read them if you can't remember them (some of them were long, so I summarized in the poll).

http://vote.sparklit.com/web_poll.spark/901347

NOW VOTE before I fetch my blue rubber gloves...

Cilantro!
TCM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Avail yourself of my trade! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more at
http://www.zazzle.com/contributors/home/default.asp?cid=23847914695881
5760
AND
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In Ohio? Join us!
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio

STARPILOTGRAINGER

Wednesday, April 6, 2005 3:40 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by StarPilotGrainger:
Nathan: I fire an arrow at it.
Other guy: Okay, now it's a gazebo with an arrow sticking out of it.
Nathan: I didn't hurt it?
Other guy: It's a gazebo!
Nathan: I drop my bow, draw my sword and strike it. Shiny! I got a natural 20! Do I kill it?
Other guy: No, you didn't. It's a gazebo.
Nathan: Gorramit! (chews on pen) What do I gotta do to kill this thing?
Other guy: It's a gazebo, man!

I know I didn't win, but for the record, in case anyone was curious, this is the story that my entry was based on:

http://www.dreadgazebo.com/eric.html

Star Pilot Grainger
"Remember, the enemy's gate is down."
LJ: http://www.livejournal.com/users/newnumber6 (real)
http://www.livejournal.com/users/alternaljournal (fictional, travelling through another world)
Unreachable Star: http://www.unreachablestar.net - Comics & SF News/Reviews/Opinions

DIZ

Thursday, April 7, 2005 10:33 PM

Yup. :)

VETERAN

Thursday, April 7, 2005 10:49 PM

That is a friggin' riot.

LOSTINTHEBLACK

Thursday, April 7, 2005 11:56 PM

That's by far the funniest D&D parody I've ever seen/read/witnessed. There really should be an entire thread dedicated to that stuff. So much potential for self-mockery...