Your favorite FIREFLY way to die

POSTED BY: Flame
UPDATED: Thursday, June 15, 2006 19:51
VIEWED: 17113
PAGE 1 of 1

FLAME

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:15 AM (P)

This is just a bizarre thought that crossed my mind. 'Member when you were a kid and someone would ask, "Would you rather freeze to death or be burned alive?" Here's the FIREFLY version.

In FIREFLY, there's a whole lotta ways to die. Which would you prefer? List of possibilities:

Reavers
Getting shot (belly, back, head)
Running out of air
Freezing to death
Burnt at the stake
Starvation
Sucked through an engine
Sucked out the airlock
Zapped by a carrion house "net"
Beaten to death by Jayne
Stabbed in a duel
Blown up
The blue hands duo wave their wand thingy at you
Tortured to death
River's brain

Or any others I may have missed.

Personally, I'd choose death by Jayne. At least I'd get to die with my hands on him.

Anyone else?

~ Flame ~

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JOSSISAGOD

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:25 AM (P)

I'd have to say sucked through the engine, it's quick and simple, plus, if you're lucky you'd muck up their engine so they'd have a helluva time trying to fix it without spare parts lying around!

JOSSIS(Most Definitely)AGOD

Self appointed Forsaken! Been on the list for a while now!

"Look at me, I'm STUPID!" The Doctor.

SILENCE

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:35 AM (P)

Rivers brain! I'm curious...

**************************
One day.
One mission.
One army of Browncoats.

On June 23rd, we aim to misbehave!
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AGATSU

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:38 AM (P)

I'd like to be licked to death by River, please.
It's a long and slow death, but I'm a trooper.

Proud Member of the FFF.net Event Team
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PINBALLWIZARD

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:38 AM (P)

Some people are killed by juggling geese!

No, I am not insane, I am crazy. Thank you for asking.

DAVESHAYNE

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:39 AM (P)

I understand there is a point in the process of freezing to death where you suddenly start to feel all warm and comfy (becuase your body is no longer warmer than it's surroundings) just before you pass out and die. I could get behind feeling warm and comfy to death.

David

"Not completely as well as the series of Firefly..." - From a review of Serenity at amazon.de

AGATSU

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:45 AM (P)

There IS the excrutiating pain of the biting cold for quite some time before that, though.

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PHOENIXROSE

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:52 AM (P)

Mmmmmm, can I go with Agatsu's way to die?

**********************************

CHRISTHECYNIC

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:55 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by jossisagod:
I'd have to say sucked through the engine, it's quick and simple, plus, if you're lucky you'd muck up their engine so they'd have a helluva time trying to fix it without spare parts lying around!

That is almost exactly what I would have said if I got here first.

CHRISTHECYNIC

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:56 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by silence:
Rivers brain! I'm curious...

And that's what I would have said if the engine weren't an option, almost said it anyway.

AGATSU

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:57 AM (P)

Yeah, let's have a River-licking MASSACRE!

(When she's 18 - I didn't wanna write Summer instead of River. )

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KHYRON

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 4:31 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
Mmmmmm, can I go with Agatsu's way to die?

PhoenixRose being licked to death by River... now there's a thought... this is too obvious, but I'll say it anyway: I'll be in my bunk.

Other people can occasionally be useful, especially as minions. I want lots of minions.

DAVESHAYNE

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 4:34 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by Agatsu:
There IS the excrutiating pain of the biting cold for quite some time before that, though.

I'm from Chicago. I can deal.

David

"Not completely as well as the series of Firefly..." - From a review of Serenity at amazon.de

ARCADIA

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 5:12 AM (P)

Hmm... assuming what Tim Minnear hinted at about Inara's black vial was true, then I will take death by sex with a drop dead gorgeous companion, please. It is a hard, hard way to die, especially for a woman who displays mostly heterosexual tendencies, but, well, I would see it through until the end.

(Minnear said that in the original conception of Firefly, before fox toned down the darkness, there was going to an episode where Inara was kidnapped by Reavers, but survived because she had injected a chemical into her blood that killed anyone who had sex with her.)

My second choice would be death by the HoB.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Objects in Space"

River: It's just an object. It doesn't mean what you think...
http://www.stillflying.net/ <-- Check it out!

SPACEANJL

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 8:17 AM (P)

Jayne beats you to death with what exactly?...

SpaceAnJL

ELOISA

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 10:57 AM (P)

Having Jayne beat you to death with Simon... now that would be interesting!

I'd probably go for River's brain, though.

***
http://forums.ffonline.com/forumdisplay.php?f=19
Creative Writing

STILLFLYIN

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 11:30 AM (P)

I'm liking this River licking idea, but if that wasn't an option, I think that getting sucked out the airlock would be ok, or getting shot in the head, both are quick and almost painless.

STILLFLYIN

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 11:30 AM (P)

oops, double post

JOHNBOY

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 12:32 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by Agatsu:
I'd like to be licked to death by River, please.
It's a long and slow death, but I'm a trooper.
B]

I'd be game..but I think I'd prefer to be slowwwwly crushed between Zoe's Amazonian breasts.

I might come up for breath one or two times, but there would be a limit to how much of a fight I would put up.

Cheers,
Johnboy

FLAME

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 12:36 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
Mmmmmm, can I go with Agatsu's way to die?

I think we could assume that being licked to death would also include "River's brain" so I'll allow it!

~ Flame ~

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FLAME

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 12:43 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
Jayne beats you to death with what exactly?...

LOL...

What a way to go...

Thanks, that made my morning.

~ Flame ~

SERENITY on the big screen in Raleigh, NC, June 22, 2006!!
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DEEPGIRL187

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 12:54 PM (P)

I think I'll take a bullet to the back of the head. Quick, clean, gets the job done. And it certainly beats being eaten by Reavers. Of course, if there's some kind of death that involves being nekkid in a bed with Jayne, I'll take one for the team.

**************************************************

It's just an object. It doesn't mean what you think.

SHELMA32

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 12:59 PM (P)

Id have to choose being beaten to death by Jane. Coz the last id see would be him.

Id prefer being ****ed to death by Mal, but that wasnt in the show...... unfortunately!!!!

PATSRULE

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 1:23 PM (P)

Probably have Saffron take me out with her deadly seduction.

ZISKER

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 1:39 PM (P)

Simon paralyzing you in the infirmary and BAM! shot of adreneline (or whatever else he's got) straight to the heart. Not that he'd probably, you know, kill anybody until Season Four or Five . . .but I could see it eventually.

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STILLSHINY

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 2:40 PM (P)

Well considering, I'm fighting with the crew & not against them I'd say going down in a blazing firefight. At least I die trying to be heroic. (though the death by Saffron's wiles is tempting)

Or if I did get attacked by Reavers it be my hope that one of the BDH's would put a bullet in my brainpan before I got et.

"We had ties that could not be broken, except by the passing of time. Like a rock. A broken time rock. And you're very special to me, my broken time rock people." - Nathan Fillion

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MSG

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 2:52 PM (P)

damn so many ways so little time. I do dearly love the fact that we can turn a referendum on death into a sexual process...it's just so us. Anyway...I think I will go for the bullet in the brain pan:)

You're only young once, but you can be immature any time!

CYBERSNARK

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 2:53 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by StillFlyin:
I'm liking this River licking idea, but if that wasn't an option, I think that getting sucked out the airlock would be ok, or getting shot in the head, both are quick and almost painless.

It isn't. Being sucked out an airlock, that is.

The brain can survive for a few seconds without oxygen, so you'd still be alive when your blood boils, your stomach contents get ripped out of you, and your lungs collapse. Horrible way to go.

I'd prefer to die. . . not at all, actually. Like Jayne, I plan to live through this.

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

MONKSDAD

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:05 PM (P)

i would go out fighting against reavers

"And I think calling him that is an insult to the psychotic lowlife community."

MARVLGRL

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:20 PM (P)

(Minnear said that in the original conception of Firefly, before fox toned down the darkness, there was going to an episode where Inara was kidnapped by Reavers, but survived because she had injected a chemical into her blood that killed anyone who had sex with her.)

Where exactly did Tim Minear say this? It'd be very Ninja Scroll of him to do something like that. And if having sex with Inara killed people her client base wouldn't be so good, and our fearless Capt. Tightpants couldn't end up with her!

How'd ya like a bite of this green apple America?

SAMEERTIA

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:22 PM (P)

Can I just get shot by Two-Fry instead? He always makes it quick and clean.

PHOENIXROSE

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:38 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by MarvlGrl:
(Minnear said that in the original conception of Firefly, before fox toned down the darkness, there was going to an episode where Inara was kidnapped by Reavers, but survived because she had injected a chemical into her blood that killed anyone who had sex with her.)

Where exactly did Tim Minear say this? It'd be very Ninja Scroll of him to do something like that. And if having sex with Inara killed people her client base wouldn't be so good, and our fearless Capt. Tightpants couldn't end up with her!

The toxin isn't ALWAYS present, silly.
I myself have wondered why a Companion would have such thing, but I'm sure the Guild has it's reasons.
I forget where I saw the hints about this. Sorry.

***********

MARVLGRL

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:41 PM (P)

I've just finished reading "In the Company of a Courtesan" by Sarah Dunnant and in it, she describes a syrum that courtesans have in case of wiley customers. Maybe this is what Inara's got it for? So she and Mal can still get it on now, phew ;)

MSG

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:45 PM (P)

Hmmm a toxin with an on off switch. This sounds like fun and hey it's one way to make sure a bad client never gets another companion

You're only young once, but you can be immature any time!

FREMDFIRMA

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 8:50 PM (P)

Gonna have to go with burned at the stake, what can I say, imma traditionalist.

I'd go down swingin, too, wonder how many lines of "99 bottles of beer on the wall" I could get off before I either fried, or drove em so crazy they shot me.

Yes, mine is an evil laugh, bwahahahah!

-Frem

MSG

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 8:52 PM (P)

Speaking of burned at the stake..I have either somehow mentally deleted part of an episode or I am nuts ( yes I know but please let that go for now) but I can't seem to remember anyone being burned at the stake...Flame who was burned at the stake???

You're only young once, but you can be immature any time!

CYBERSNARK

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 9:10 PM (P)

River and Simon were almost burned in "Safe."

Shortly before the Big Damn Heroes line.

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

MIRAMEL

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 9:23 PM (P)

rivers brain- or tounge. only way to go :) ooo, altho i could also go w/ burned in a fire while being fired from a fry-cook opportunity in the middle of a fire-fight....

MSG

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 9:28 PM (P)

ah thanks. No one actually dies that's why I couldn't quite place it, but that helped:)

You're only young once, but you can be immature any time!

AGATSU

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 9:29 PM (P)

The death-after-sex-drug is what was in the syringe Inara pulls out when the reavers are after them, just in case. It's not a superpower.

Proud Member of the FFF.net Event Team
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KINROEDARKSTONE

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 9:32 PM (P)

I choose death by Kaylee. All that sweetness in close procimity for too long could give me a heartattack.

Or death by Mal, kinda like that Alliance agent in "Serenity-the pilot episode". Bam! on from the hip.

--------------
Wash: Closing in.
Zoe: Planet's coming up a might fast.
Wash: That's just 'cause I'm goin' down too quick. Likely crash and kill us all.
Mal: Well, if that happens, let me know.

13

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 10:16 PM (P)

Go down swingin under a pile of Reavers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

13, First Mate of the 'Heart of Haven'
and Honorary Forsaken

REDLAVA

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 12:07 AM (P)

I would have to go with the Reavers too. Just something about being raped and eaten to death that sounds fun.

JOHNBOY

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 12:40 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by SameErtia:
Can I just get shot by Two-Fry instead? He always makes it quick and clean.

He hasn't been doin' much shoot'un practice lately..

Cheers,
Johnboy

PENGUIN

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 1:13 AM (P)

Death by cosmic concubine...

RMMC

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 1:15 AM (P)

So I can't pick a Serenity way to die then?

Okay, I'll go with freezing.

I still think I should be able to die a Serenity way...

Select to view spoiler:

I wanna have a big harpoon through me after I save the ship, gorrammit! That would be worth it!.

******
RMMC

RAVENHAIR

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 2:40 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
Jayne beats you to death with what exactly?...

SpaceAnJL

I'll wait to answer until this question is answered definitively...

*****
Mal:We're still flying.
Simon: That's not much.
Mal: It's enough.

BELOWZERO

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 4:28 AM (P)

I would prefer to die of exhaustion after several weeks/months/whatever in bed with Mal....but failing that, I'll let Jayne beat me to death with his. . .

. . .quick wit? hehe

"Do not go gentle into that good night....
Rage, rage against the dying of the light. . ."
--Dylan Thomas

Though my soul may set in darkness
It will rise in perfect light.
I have loved the stars too fondly
To be fearful of the night.

BELOWZERO

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 4:33 AM (P)

....or was that "eaten to death by Jayne?" yeah, that sounds good too....

"Do not go gentle into that good night....
Rage, rage against the dying of the light. . ."
--Dylan Thomas

Though my soul may set in darkness
It will rise in perfect light.
I have loved the stars too fondly
To be fearful of the night.

RIVER6213

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 4:39 AM (P)

Telling Mal to kiss my white ass before he kicks me into the engine.

Satisfying death I think.

River

FLAME

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 5:23 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by RiveR6213:
Telling Mal to kiss my white ass before he kicks me into the engine.

Better yet, tell him to take a bite of YOUR "green apple."

~ Flame ~

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FLAME

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 5:34 AM (P)

You're right, I didn't include the two spoiler deaths from SERENITY. Those count, too.

~ Flame ~

SERENITY on the big screen in Raleigh, NC, June 22, 2006!!
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RIVER6213

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 5:50 AM (P)

Green Apple? that's lost on me.

River

SQUID

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 5:51 AM (P)

How about going out, the Nandi way? Meet the captain, sleep with the captain, and ultimately be "failed" by him and get shot with a laser. Death after sex? Uh yeaa. Sorta indirectly related but hey, the guys got death-after-sex drug with Nara.

--------------------
"Is it bad that what she said made perfect
sense to me?"

FLAME

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 6:02 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by RiveR6213:
Green Apple? that's lost on me.

In the extended FIREFLY gag reel, Nathan says "How'd you like a bite of this green apple, America?" after rubbing his rearend.

~ Flame ~

SERENITY on the big screen in Raleigh, NC, June 22, 2006!!
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PHOENIXROSE

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 7:32 AM (P)

That line is also in the regular gag reel that made release, said when the circle is closing on his nekkid butt. Though I didn't know it was actually him saying it until I saw the extended; I don't know why, but it just didn't sound like him. I laughed so hard when I found out!

***********

RIVER6213

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 7:59 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by Flame:
Quote:
Originally posted by RiveR6213:
Green Apple? that's lost on me.

In the extended FIREFLY gag reel, Nathan says "How'd you like a bite of this green apple, America?" after rubbing his rearend.

~ Flame ~

SERENITY on the big screen in Raleigh, NC, June 22, 2006!!
http://www.monkeyshinesbeadery.com/serenity/shindig/

Oh, I see. I didnt see that particular gag reel.

River

AYRAD

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 8:53 AM (P)

Hot, steamy, passionate, hard sex with Jayne 'til I can't breathe no more. I'd definitely leave this 'verse happy!

AB AMORE NON RECEDAM
www.cthomashowell.net

SPACEANJL

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 9:02 AM (P)

Isn't it odd how many people choose this method?

Pictures Jayne slumped in a shuttle, shirt in rags.

"Hell, Mal, I ain't goin' out there no more. 'Verse is full o' crazy women tearing at my clothes. An' even with them shots from the Doc I can't be takin' all of 'em on..."

SpaceAnJL

NIRWIN

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 10:45 AM (P)

Sucked through an engine, it's quick, and you can hopefully cause some damage to the engine as a last act of defiance.

---
Nirwin

AGATSU

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 11:02 AM (P)

I'd also turn around and fart before Mal kicks me. And probably go "Wheeeeeeee!".

Proud Member of the FFF.net Event Team
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CHOO1701

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 11:34 AM (P)

Throught the engine: quick and quite airy

or being licked to death by River (or Kaylee if you dress up as a giant strawberry...)

"Remember, always be yourself. Unless you suck."-Joss Whedon

BELLONA

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 2:11 PM (P)

Quote:
originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
Pictures Jayne slumped in a shuttle, shirt in rags.

"Hell, Mal, I ain't goin' out there no more. 'Verse is full o' crazy women tearing at my clothes. An' even with them shots from the Doc I can't be takin' all of 'em on..."

then just have me, darlin!! failin' that, i'll take an overdose of mal any day.

b

"i'm getting a powerful energy emission..."
my other coat is brown.
I used to be snow white but I drifted - Mae West
1 conversion

FLAME

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 2:19 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by SpaceAnJL:
Isn't it odd how many people choose this method?

Pictures Jayne slumped in a shuttle, shirt in rags.

"Hell, Mal, I ain't goin' out there no more. 'Verse is full o' crazy women tearing at my clothes. An' even with them shots from the Doc I can't be takin' all of 'em on..."

SpaceAnJL

It is interesting how popular "Death By Jayne" is. And here I thought I was the weird one for starting this thread and choosing it, myself.

I just have to say, your post is HIGH-larious. I could totally see it. Should be worked, somehow, into the SERENITY sequel or FIREFLY season two!!!

~ Flame ~

SERENITY on the big screen in Raleigh, NC, June 22, 2006!!
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SIXSHOOTER

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 2:31 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by KinroeDarkstone:

I choose death by Kaylee. All that sweetness in close procimity for too long could give me a heartattack.

If you had diabetes, a few minutes around her’d be more then enough to do you in.

As for me I'd take being 'Stabbed in a Duel.'
Badarse way to go out.

Anyone else who feels the same way can meet me on the field of honor come daybreak.

KAYLEESTHEGREATEST

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 3:24 PM (P)

necrofelia

Someday the verse will spit in your soup but at least they gave you soup.
one day
one plan
one mission
one army of browncoats
june 23rd serenity day

-Our mission as browncoats is to make us known.

SMARTBUTDUMBBLONDE

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 6:02 PM (P)

I would chose overdosing on Wash. And even if I somehow survived that happy scenario, Zoe would probably kill me anyway.
I guess a bullet in the brainpan (squish)would be quick and fairly painless, but it'd leave one hell of a mess for someone to clean up.

Damn you Fox!! Damn you to Hades!!

CHOO1701

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 7:19 PM (P)

How about having a heart attack. In Inara's shuttle. With the lead Pipe (what, were not playing Cludo!?! )

"Remember, always be yourself. Unless you suck."-Joss Whedon

SIMONB

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 7:29 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by Arcadia:
(Minnear said that in the original conception of Firefly, before fox toned down the darkness, there was going to an episode where Inara was kidnapped by Reavers, but survived because she had injected a chemical into her blood that killed anyone who had sex with her.)

Well, if I had to go....yeah, that's the one.

- Shiny. Let's be bad guys.

That is not dead which can eternal lie, and with strange aeons even death may die

JAYNEFAN101

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 7:59 PM (P)

i'd be killed by Reavers

RMMC

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 8:55 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by Flame:
You're right, I didn't include the two spoiler deaths from SERENITY. Those count, too.

Shiny! Then I'll go with that!

'Course now that someone mentions it, I wouldn't mind going out how Nandi did...provided I got a night with Mal prior to it as well.

******
RMMC

AGATSU

Thursday, June 15, 2006 7:39 AM (P)

I've slept with Mal, and he ain't all that.

*runs for the hills* .................... \o/ -muhahahahahahahaha!

Proud Member of the FFF.net Event Team
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Be there or be a purple-belted poop head. (<- not the official slogan)

RMMC

Thursday, June 15, 2006 7:51 PM (P)

Huh. Funny. He said the self same thing about you, Agatsu.

hehehehehe

How 'bout we settle this like civilized folk? Yep. I'm a callin' you out for a duel.

hehehehehehehhehehee *coughcough* *uses inhailer*
Hehehehehehehheheeeee!

******
RMMC