CAPTION TIGHTPANTS RISE AGAIN! #5

POSTED BY: TenthCrewMember
UPDATED: Thursday, December 28, 2006 03:58
VIEWED: 12190
PAGE 1 of 1

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Friday, October 13, 2006 1:16 AM (P)

Woo! Some serious ruttin' votin' goin' on! But we have our winner, by a singe vote...who? That's right! SIMONWHO!

Congrats! A well earned victory! Not your first, and I suspect, not your last! :)

And now a very special entry into the CAPTION TIGHTPANTS hallowed halls of hi-larity...the man his own self...the Boss...My Master...the Sultan of Sadism...MR. WHEDON! *ahem* I mean, Joss.

JOSS: A ship like this, treat her right, and she'll be with you until the day you die.
Huh? Wazzat? We're cancelled?!?! Fuck.

Okay, so mine's a bit on the depressin' side,
so lighten it up with your own form of Joss Brand Goodness(TM)(C)(R) pat.pend.

BWAH!
TCM

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JADEHAND

Friday, October 13, 2006 1:26 AM (P)

Welcome home.

DAVESHAYNE

Friday, October 13, 2006 1:40 AM (P)

Joss: Come on in, keg's around back, $5 cover.

David

"Not completely as well as the series of Firefly..." - From a review of Serenity at amazon.de

SILENCE

Friday, October 13, 2006 1:43 AM (P)

Firefly on sale

**************************
"Listen, if you got guests I can come back later."

YINYANG

Friday, October 13, 2006 2:09 AM (P)

Joss (VO): And, there's me in the good-old days. Hard to believe it was less than five years ago...

(Pause)

Damn you, Fox! Damn you all to Hell!

Alan (VO): He really needs to work on his Charlton Heston impression.

---
"What the world needs now is love, sweet love - it's the only thing that there's just too little of. What the world needs now is love, sweet love. No, not just for some, but for everyone."

Trouble-Maker in the House!

http://richlabonte.net/tvvote

N0SKILLZ

Friday, October 13, 2006 2:12 AM (P)

oops double!

RYCE

Friday, October 13, 2006 2:13 AM (P)

Joss: Okay, Mr. Teacher, sir, here's my lifesize diorama for class, complete with moving parts.

No power in the 'verse can stop me!

N0SKILLZ

Friday, October 13, 2006 2:13 AM (P)

Joss: When Tom Hanks grew a beard he had a ball with a face on it. I got this!

-------------------------------
RAF Lakenheath
Security Deputy of the Sereni-Tree
"I can't feel my Danger Zone" Jayne Muppet!
http://walkerboh.deviantart.com/

FLORALBUNNY

Friday, October 13, 2006 4:30 AM (P)

Come on up to the galley to question the buffet.
Dunno where that gorram lazy FloralBunny's got to
with the strawberries.....

bun, a small tear falling while she surveys the
beloved boat and its instigator once again
~Bastards cancelled my TV show~

PUMAMANREDUX

Friday, October 13, 2006 4:49 AM (P)

"Welcome to my reimagineering of Babylon 5 .."

or

"We're about to film Oscar The Grouch's big scene in Sesame Steet: The Next Generation"

THEREALME

Friday, October 13, 2006 5:43 AM (P)

JOSS: Welcome back, my friends, to the show that never ends! We're so glad you could attend. Come inside, come inside!

TheRealMe, Captain of the Sereni-Tree

CHOO1701

Friday, October 13, 2006 5:46 AM (P)

Joss: what do you mean beard?

or

Joss: I think that browncoats everywhere should know Nathan's not the messiah, hes a very naughty boy!!!

or

Joss: You need to go where everybody knows your name....and there always gald you came...

-----------------------------

TRAIN!!!

MANWITHPEZ

Friday, October 13, 2006 7:05 AM (P)

Quote:

Joss: Nope...Still not big enough for my ego!

OR

Joss (circa 2002): And here's the cargo hold where Angel will jump out, attack Zoe, and Buffy will finally sta...Waitaminute...What show am I taping again?

OR

Joss: Nope...Still not big enough for Nathan's ego!

OR

Joss: We've been filming for 18 hours straight, and I have to go right to editting for Buffy.

Nathan: (OS) I'm hungry!

Joss: SHUT UP!

OR

Best Dollhouse Ever!

OR

Joss: Fox would have you believe that Firefly was just too darn expensive to keep filming. But, as you can see here, Serenity was really made out of Elmer's glue and Nathan Fillion's nose hair.

OR

Joss: It's getting a little crowded in here. Everyone leave. Not you Adam. Not you Number Two. Not you, random henchman in video village pretending like you're doing something...

OR

Joss: Yes, yes, the rest of the cast got their own trailers when we made Serenity. But, did you see mine?

OR

Later, after Joss had given the tour to everyone, Adam, Nathan, Alan, Summer and he were going to ride bikes nekkid in the cargo hold. Why? Cause they could!

OR

Joss: We tried to tell the whole story with shadow puppets...but, it just wasn't reaching the audience...so we built this instead.

OR

Joss's mutant tiny arm didn't scare anyone except Summer...and sometimes Adam.

OR

Joss: Bastard took my parking spot!

OR

In order to keep Nathan from wandering about the set nude, Joss motions to the tiny cage Nathan was kept in until his nude scene in Trash was filmed.

OR

Firefly: A show with women in boxes and a whole lotta ladders.

OR

Joss proudly shows off the warehouse that keeps all the Firefly and Angel scripts that never made it to air.

OR

Joss Whedon: Proud Owner of the only Slip 'n' Slide on the Fox backlot.

OR

Joss: I need an idea for another Saffron episode...Hmmm...what's this here...a trashcan, eh? Hmmmm...Trash...

Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."

SIMONWHO

Friday, October 13, 2006 7:29 AM (P)

Yay, Chandler wins it for me. Could I *be* any more impaled? Though I did like lots of the other ones too.

"... and this is where they held me prisoner, forcing me to write episode after episode..."

CHOO1701

Friday, October 13, 2006 8:01 AM (P)

Joss: and over here's where they store Canada

-----------------------

Even though Joss swas pionting out that Nathon was running in around in one of Morena's costumes, nobody could stop staring at his ginger beard...

---------------

TRAIN!!!

DEBBIE

Friday, October 13, 2006 11:09 AM (P)

Joss: None of this is as it seems. That is not Oscars trash can, Big Bird will not appear,and this is not the way to Sesame Street.

SAB39

Friday, October 13, 2006 1:08 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by manwithpez:
Quote:

Joss's mutant tiny arm didn't scare anyone except Summer...and sometimes Adam.

This gets my vote!

PDCHARLES

Friday, October 13, 2006 1:41 PM (P)

Joss: ...and here is the very trash can Morena AND Jewel became "aquainted with" at the wrap party...

OR

Joss: take the shot from here... we're still trying to clean a guy out of the engine.

OR

Joss: This is the set of some show... Terraforming didn't hold, or some such.
Few cast members died.

CYBERSNARK

Friday, October 13, 2006 2:11 PM (P)

"It's the Muppet Show! With our very special guest star, NATHAN FILION! YAAAYYYYYYYY!"

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

SICKDUDE

Friday, October 13, 2006 5:32 PM (P)

Joss: They're called Oompa Loompas...
Reporter: What?!
Joss: I said they're called Oompa Loompas. They come from Loompaland. When I found them, they were being eaten by the Snozzwangers, Hornswogglers, wicked Whangdoodles, and Vermicious Knids. So I recued them and brought them here to build sets and act in my shows....

"I am your father, Luke. Give in to the Dark Side, you nob!" - Doug McKenzie

CANTER

Friday, October 13, 2006 6:06 PM (P)

Quote:

THIS SIDE UP!!

Burn the land and boil the sea...

CHOO1701

Friday, October 13, 2006 6:23 PM (P)

Joss: My other bin is Serenity...

-----------------------------

TRAIN!!!

MINK

Friday, October 13, 2006 7:00 PM (P)

Put down another vote for tiny mutant arm. *LOL!*

"When I write my memoirs, that sh!t'll be in there, guaranteed."

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

Saturday, October 14, 2006 12:04 AM (P)

JOSS:"Now this is my home away from home...i come here when i need a break, i come here when i feel in a firefly mood, i come here when the wife kicks me out of the house for talking about a sequel...."

OR

JOSS:"This is my home; you all are guests on it."

OR
(here's a throwback reference)
JOSS:"Who cares what face the cat made, TAKE A LOOK AT THE MULE!!!"

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Creator of "THE OTHER SHINY CAPTION GAME"!
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01
Time for some thrilling heroics!
poor_noel2@hotmail.com

VERSEEXPLORER

Saturday, October 14, 2006 6:56 AM (P)

Joss: I know it looks real, but these are really little action figures. See I can pick them up.

or

Joss: All together now,
Put your right hand in
Put your right hand out
Put your right hand in
And shake it all about.

or

Nathan (OS): Joss, I need some advise about that nude scene with Saffron.
Joss: Just extend your arm and grab!

I made a web site to introduce my friends to the 'Verse.
http://web.mac.com/arcadianlc

CHOO1701

Saturday, October 14, 2006 3:49 PM (P)

Joss: Cross dressing captains, sex scences and innuendos, psycho teenagers, cannabals, priests AND lots of shotting people dead. And their puppies.... 'Cause Fox will love it!!!

...

BTW: did i mention sex scences already....

-------------

Joss: Yep. A real beauty, ain't she? Yessir.
A right smart purchase, this vessel.
Tell you what, you buy this ship, treat her
proper, she'll be with ya for the rest of
your life....

(^seemed apppropiate )
-----------------------------

TRAIN!!!

PUMAMANREDUX

Saturday, October 14, 2006 3:52 PM (P)

"I'm putting Wonder Woman on hold for the Green Acres movie .. due out summer 2008 ..."

DRAGONWINE

Saturday, October 14, 2006 4:44 PM (P)

Yo! MTV, welcome to my crib!

OR

Instead of making some actual money, or feeding fan frenzy, by selling this on ebay, Fox will tear this all down.
BRILLIANT!
I'm sorry did I drip some sarcasm?

Everything is impossible, but it's all here anyway. Enjoy!

YINYANG

Saturday, October 14, 2006 4:50 PM (P)

Joss (to himself): I'm trying really hard to pretend I like it here. I wonder if it's working...

Nathan and Alan (OS): It's not working!

---

Okay, that was lame. Let's try s'more!

---

Joss: And this is the set we stole from "Little House on the Prairie."

Joss (VO): I never understood how that show ran for so long. It didn't even follow the books!

---

When Joss raises his arm, the smell drives everyone away.

---

Joss: ::sighs:: Here they come down the ramp, to make fun of me again.

---

Joss: Please ignore all those people you see here behind me. They're not important.

---
"What the world needs now is love, sweet love - it's the only thing that there's just too little of. What the world needs now is love, sweet love. No, not just for some, but for everyone."

Trouble-Maker in the House!

http://richlabonte.net/tvvote

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Saturday, October 14, 2006 6:03 PM (P)

Joss: SEE proof of alien life! FORGET what your mother told you when she tucked you in at night, FORGET the lies of our cabalistic allied government. This will haunt your dreams and harrow, YES! your very soul. Firefly Slash, just 6 bits!

OR

Joss: And here we see my practical joke in action. I took all these ideas other people had, threw 'em in a blender, and FOX bought it hook, line and sinker. Paid millions! Nobody's gonna watch 'LightningBug'...egg on their face!

OR

Joss: Firefly for sale...cheap...a must sell...hardly used...greatly loved.

OR

Joss: Everything here is eatable, boys and girls, even...uh, the, umm...people...hrm...that could be a plot device...if you'll excuse me now...

OR

Joss: At first I was going to use actors, but then I saw Team America, and well, marionettes are so much more the awesome.

OR

Joss: Do you think this trap is too elaborate to catch a FOX?

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Saturday, October 14, 2006 6:06 PM (P)

AND ON THE SEVENTH DAY, GOD SPOKE TO MAN AND HE SAID
"LET THERE BE FIREFLY!" AND SO IT CAME TO BE.

BWAH!
TCM

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*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=13&t=12622
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CHOO1701

Saturday, October 14, 2006 7:06 PM (P)

Joss: ...and here's one i made earlier.

-------------

Joss:...yours, in only 15 payments. Comes with some amazing free extras....

-------------

Joss: welcome, to my rip off of Starhunter....

(^ for Safe@2nd )

--------------

Joss: so, what do you think of Optimus Prime's new look. And no, its not the bin....Also: I'm thinking a fox for Megatron....

-------------------

Joss wasn't that amused when someone glued a metal rod to his arm...

-----------------------------

TRAIN!!!

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Saturday, October 14, 2006 8:06 PM (P)

SOME WAYS OF GETTING TO SESAME STREET ARE MORE EXCITING THAN OTHERS...

OR

Joss: All this can be yours! ... The map. Please.

OR

Joss: Welcome to Casa de Sadism!

OR

The future of Firefly: Stop Motion Claymation

YINYANG

Saturday, October 14, 2006 8:15 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:
SOME WAYS OF GETTING TO SESAME STREET ARE MORE EXCITING THAN OTHERS...

Lol!

I vote for that one, right now!

---
"What the world needs now is love, sweet love - it's the only thing that there's just too little of. What the world needs now is love, sweet love. No, not just for some, but for everyone."

Trouble-Maker in the House!

http://richlabonte.net/tvvote

CHOO1701

Saturday, October 14, 2006 8:30 PM (P)

Nathan (on set): so when will you tell him the camera crew are fakes...
Adam: Easy. After the fake cops arrive...

-----------------------------
TRAIN!!!

PUMAMANREDUX

Saturday, October 14, 2006 9:42 PM (P)

"Welcome to my Neil Young tribute ..."

or

"Welcome to U.S.Acres: The Movie"

CITIZEN

Saturday, October 14, 2006 10:55 PM (P)

Well ya see officer I was just a sittin' in ma yard when I hears this roarin'. Next thang I know theres a spaceship in ma front room and this fellas danglin' outa the window singin' 'bout heros a Canton.

Or

Joss (to landscape gardener): No I said I wanted a FEELING of Serenity in my garden!

Or

It's always the same, you leave a skip outside you're house and Fox starts dumping their rubbish in it...

More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.

FLORALBUNNY

Sunday, October 15, 2006 1:46 AM (P)

JOSS: And welcome back to This Old Ship.
This week we'll be doing some more metalwork
and Norm will show us how space-toilets are
plumbed in.

bun, flushing
~Bastards singed my turtle~

PUMAMANREDUX

Sunday, October 15, 2006 1:53 AM (P)

(Joss, low voice) "We've rigged this to fall .. watch the fun as I guest host on Punk'd"

JPSTARGAZER

Sunday, October 15, 2006 5:19 AM (P)

Joss: "And these blast points, too accurate for Sandpeople. Only Imperial stormtroopers are so precise...oh sorry...sometimes I get my sci-fi confused."

"All I got is a red guitar, three chords, and the truth...the rest is up to you"
--Bono

REAVERINA1985RIVIERA

Sunday, October 15, 2006 7:09 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Some unknown extra: As you can see, Mr. Reynolds, your ship needed some MAJOR restoration just to become spaceworthy. I mean, it took three men 4 days just to scrape the pigieon droppings off the hull and don't ask about what I found "living" in the plumbing. She'll be ready in a month.

---------------------------------------------
How many Jaynes does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to try to put it in and another to find a bigger hammer.

FLORALBUNNY

Tuesday, October 17, 2006 3:14 AM (P)

"Everybody not talking about sex -- in here.
Everybody else -- elsewhere!"

bun
~Bastards singed my turtle~

YINYANG

Tuesday, October 17, 2006 3:41 AM (P)

Random set person: Hey! Who left this cardboard cut-out of Joss just laying around?

---
"What the world needs now is love, sweet love - it's the only thing that there's just too little of. What the world needs now is love, sweet love. No, not just for some, but for everyone."

Trouble-Maker in the House!

http://richlabonte.net/tvvote

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Tuesday, October 17, 2006 10:23 PM (P)

Tell me how you get to Serenity Street?

Alternatively, you can go vote... :P

http://vote.sparklit.com/web_poll.spark/1011676

VO-O-O-OTING TIME!

BWAH!
TCM

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*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=13&t=12622
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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YINYANG

Wednesday, October 18, 2006 1:00 AM (P)

Yay for voting!

---
"What the world needs now is love, sweet love - it's the only thing that there's just too little of. What the world needs now is love, sweet love. No, not just for some, but for everyone."

Trouble-Maker in the House!

http://richlabonte.net/tvvote

FLORALBUNNY

Wednesday, October 18, 2006 2:08 AM (P)

nudge

bun
~Bastards singed my turtle~

PUMAMANREDUX

Wednesday, October 18, 2006 2:16 AM (P)

Can't believe my humble riff made it on the list of finalists ...

VERSEEXPLORER

Wednesday, October 18, 2006 2:47 AM (P)

Funny, PumamanRedux. You had a lot posted, and it was your 1st one. Good luck.

I made a web site to introduce my friends to the 'Verse.
http://web.mac.com/arcadianlc

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Wednesday, October 18, 2006 3:05 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by PumamanRedux:
Can't believe my humble riff made it on the list of finalists ...

Hey, you just never know what will strike me funny!
Keep 'em comin'!

oh, and *VOTE BUMP*

BWAH!

TCM

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*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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VERSEEXPLORER

Thursday, October 19, 2006 6:08 AM (P)

Bump
Vote

I made a web site to introduce my friends to the 'Verse.
http://web.mac.com/arcadianlc

N0SKILLZ

Thursday, October 19, 2006 6:16 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by N0Skillz:

Joss on TLCs Rides: This is my other ride.

-------------------------------
RAF Lakenheath
Security Deputy of the Sereni-Tree
"I can't feel my Danger Zone" Jayne Muppet!
http://walkerboh.deviantart.com/

ANOBJECTINSPACE

Thursday, October 19, 2006 8:27 AM (P)

Joss: Pimp my ride!

.....
"It's just an Object"

VERSEEXPLORER

Thursday, October 19, 2006 11:10 AM (P)

Too late for more captions.
Just a bump for more votes.

I made a web site to introduce my friends to the 'Verse.
http://web.mac.com/arcadianlc

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Thursday, October 19, 2006 10:11 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by VerseExplorer:
Too late for more captions.
Just a bump for more votes.

Too late for more potential winning captions.
Never too late for more captions!

Keep an eye out for the next CT coming soon!

BWAH!

TCM

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*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at
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FLORALBUNNY

Friday, October 20, 2006 2:51 AM (P)

JOSS: Just take those beagles right up that ramp.
(only a vote-bump, actually)
bun, or was it bagels????
~Bastards singed my turtle~

VETERAN

Friday, October 20, 2006 3:04 AM (P)

Quote:
FloralBunny wrote:
Thursday, October 19, 2006 16:51
JOSS: Just take those beagles right up that ramp.
(only a vote-bump, actually)
bun, or was it bagels????

Too bad. That's a good one.

SAB39

Sunday, December 24, 2006 11:40 PM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:
Too late for more potential winning captions.
Never too late for more captions!

Ok, I wonder if I get the prize for belatedest ever entry in a caption contest ;)

Mal to Book (OS, inside Serenity): You're welcome on my boat, Shephard.
(gestures towards Joss) God ain't.

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Monday, December 25, 2006 4:48 AM (P)

I'll have to do the math...

...there is a distinct possibility, but equally not. :)

BWAH!
TCM

http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew

*Download my Firefly Games for FREE at
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=13&t=12622
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WALRUS

Monday, December 25, 2006 5:42 AM (P)

Joss : (Shaking cane off screen) And here is my shiiiiiiiiiiiiip

FLORALBUNNY

Monday, December 25, 2006 7:42 AM (P)

No mercy. No resistance. Open up -- see what's inside....

bun
~Bastards belated my turtle~

ASARIAN

Wednesday, December 27, 2006 1:30 AM (P)

Quote:
Originally posted by TenthCrewMember:

Darn, I missed this round. :) Oh well, never too late to caption:

Joss (while shooting Firefly Season 2): If anyone gets nosy, you know, just shoot 'em.

Or:

Mal (on ramp): I don't mean to alarm anybody, but I think we're being followed.

Or:

Joss (to reporter): Now I did a job. I got nothing but trouble since I did it, not to mention more than a few unkind words as regard to my character. So let me make this abundantly clear: I do the job, I get canceled.

--
"Mei-mei, everything I have is right here." -- Simon Tam

FISKMASEN

Wednesday, December 27, 2006 2:21 AM (P)

Darn, too late. But I'll post my caption anyways, found it quite funny myself. =)

As a bumpersticker:

"Do you know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I'm going to beat you with 'til you know who's in ruttin' command here!"

FLORALBUNNY

Wednesday, December 27, 2006 3:45 AM (P)

MAL (VO w/"long ago" echo): You want my advice, you won't tow it back...

PS Cool, Fiskmasen -- I think we can get
those somewhere. Or plate-frames.

bun

RHAEGARTARGARYEN

Wednesday, December 27, 2006 7:33 AM (P)

And there's the door that took my left arm.

My signature...Rhae.

FLORALBUNNY

Thursday, December 28, 2006 3:58 AM (P)

Gorramnit, Rhae! Cracker-bits in the keyboard again!!!

Documentary-style VO:
Reduced eventually to working as an infomercial
host, Whedon pitched everything from shavers to
men's fashion. In this obscure bit of film, he
demonstrates placement of the bait in a
Hav-a-Hart (TM) No-Kill Geek Trap.

bun
~Bastards suckered my turtle~
~we aim to exponentiate~