I love riding on elevators. It'sone of my favorite things. Do you ever just ride one for several hours? You meet all kinds of people--cause they always ride twice!

Lyrics by Mono Puff used shamelessly without any permission:

I want to know the day custodian
I want to hear his harsh refrain
But most of all, I hear the calling
Of the watchman after hours

I want to be the night security
I want to own a tiny TV
With the sound turned down, and no one around
I'll sing so very loud


I want to be the night security
I want to sleep right in my clothes
I want to open my eyes, as people walk by
And whisper "who's that guy?"


My keychain is on the table
Its massive size implies
The scope of what I'm able
To unlock any time


I want to be the night security
I want to sleep right in my clothes
I want to open my eyes, as people walk by
And whisper "who's that guy?"

-Mono Puff

Or Security.

What is it exactly that you do? All I can think of is graveyard shift motel front desk clerk. And that's only cause I saw them doing a lot of that on my recent cross country trips.