“Now, honeybutt,” he said, condescendingly, “you know I like to watch you work – I surely do! But this was just too good a chance not to take! I gotta keep the fictitious romance alive!”
“And if we get caught?”
“Relax! I can be as drunk as I need to be to convince anyone I’m just a lust-happy groom who lifted it for a lark.”
“I’m kinda hopin’ they at least give you a cavity search. Might suggest it myself, it comes to that.”
“Now, baby, is that any way to talk to your sweetums?”
“This fictitious marriage is sure off to a rocky start,” she said, frowning.
“Relax! Trust me! A good, solid fictitious marriage is always built on trust!”
“Really,” she said, dryly. “An’ you been married how many times?”
“Just this once,” he admitted, “but you gotta confess it’s goin’ pretty gorram well so far!”
-- The Treasure of Lei Fong Wu -- Chapter Seventeen by ScrewtheAlliance