Insomnia by CallMeSerenity

CALLMESERENITY'S BLOG

CallMeSerenity

Insomnia
Wednesday, June 8, 2005

I am SO tired today. I feel like a zombie that got hit by a bus.
I usually have trouble sleeping. I have to take various herbs that help me sleep since those over the counter sleep aids tend to make me groggy all day long.
I've had insomnia since college, it comes and goes, I never know when it'll strike.
Last night I was so tired from weeks of not getting enough sleep, so I went to bed a bit early. I was very excited at the prospect of getting more than 8hrs. But I woke up around 2:30am to a HUGE thunderstorm. It was raining so hard it sounded like machine guns were being fired at my house. There may have been hail, I'm not sure.
My cat spends his nights on our screened in porch. He wants to be wild so that's as close as he gets. But he is terrified of thunder, so I had to get up and let him in. He was in near hysterics. He had to curl up in bed with me for awhile until he calmed down and then he ran around the house crying whenever it thundered (for such a large cat, he's really quite a baby.)
I just couldn't fall asleep after that. My mind was racing with so many different thoughts: what do I need to do tomorrow, what should I wear, what should I pack for lunch, what is the answer to life, the universe and everything (oh, wait, I know that one.) I could not turn my brain off. I was so exhausted I wanted to cry.
I did eventually fall asleep, and I slept for a couple of hours before my cat woke me up again, this time because the storm was over and he wanted back outside (the beast!). I let myself sleep in an extra half hour and gave up my morning walk, but all I really did was lie in bed with my eyes closed, pleading with sleep to give me just 10 minutes of it's time.
What I hate most about having insomnia is that it is so hard to be productive during the day. I become sleep obsessed; it's all I can think about. I have so many things I want to do, but I just can't drudge up the energy to do them. I don't give 100% at work, I let things slide at home. I'm grouchy all the time (and I hate being grouchy) and my mind wanders...
Anybody out there one of those sleep doctors who wants to do a study on me and fix me? I would not be opposed to that.

COMMENTS

Wednesday, June 8, 2005 9:07 AM

CALLMESERENITY

MG-I take a combination of Valarian Root and Melatonin. Valarian Root makes you sleepy and shuts the brain up and melatonin just makes you drowsy. It works most of the time, but if I take them too often, then I get used to them and have to either take more or stop using them for awhile. I drink valarian root tea, I find it works faster than taking a pill.
And Ath is a pain like that, isn't he?

Wednesday, June 8, 2005 8:35 AM

MONTANAGIRL

What herbs do you use and do they help? I've tried two different OTC sleep aids (not the ones with Benadryl 'cause it doesn't touch me), three different prescriptions, and upping my antidepressant and nothing helps me. My only consolation is that it's only when I have to work the next day; on my days off I can sleep for 14 hours.

And it doesn't help that your brother is keeping me up late in the chat room ;)

Wednesday, June 8, 2005 7:33 AM

CALLMESERENITY

That's supposed to be "jog" around the gym. Grr.

Wednesday, June 8, 2005 7:33 AM

CALLMESERENITY

Aaah, misery loves company. I just took a job around the gym to try to wake myself up and keep myself going, but I feel more tired than ever. I think if I had 5 minutes of solitude and a place to lay down, I'd be out. 'Course, then I would't sleep at all tonight.

Wednesday, June 8, 2005 6:29 AM

SOULOFSERENITY

Oof, I know the feeling. I don't think I've slept for more that 20 minutes at a time over the last several weeks. I don't know why, but its driving me nuts!

Wednesday, June 8, 2005 6:22 AM

THATWEIRDGIRL

Me three! Life long insomniac here.

Wednesday, June 8, 2005 6:20 AM

MANWITHPEZ

I know the feeling...If you ever want to know how my brain works after I haven't gotten any sleep, just read one of the "All Over The Place" flylogs...

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