ASARIAN'S BLOG

asarian

Everybody dies alone
Friday, February 3, 2006

I feel so lonely, today. :( I check the board often; write the occasional post, too. But I feel so lost today. I try and be quasi-funny, crack a few chicken jokes, grab a few laughs here and there. But, underneath, I really just want to talk about River. But I fear people will soon grow tired of it. And I do, of course, not want to come off too overtly psychotic. Yeah, there's that. :) Seriously, though, I am not mentally disturbed. Although I guess that statement is as true as it is untrue.

Addiction, I reckon, has much in common with music. There are these neural pathways being formed, that kinda 'train' your brain to expect certain patterns. And in the absence thereof, well, ... you probably feel the tug yourself.

I miss River. How crazy is that? It's true, though.

There's this sweetheart called River.
"Little one" is the name Mal did give'er.
She makes me cry.
Don't ask for a why.
I'm simply saying: I miss her.

That's not much of a poem, either, is it? :( I feel so, so sad today.

"tai nanguo" (= too sad) indeed.

COMMENTS

Sunday, February 12, 2006 10:54 AM

SHADOWCHILD


We need to talk. Got any messengers? AIM, MSN, Y!IM??? Id love to talk to you! Blogs can only do so much, you know?

I think Im starting to know what Simon feels. I must take care of this person and protect them from harm! lol

I do understand! And if theres ANYTHING I dont understand I assure you, I wont leave it alone until its been explained enough so that I do. I can be annoyingly persistant like that...

Sunday, February 12, 2006 9:19 AM

ASARIAN


Hey ShadowChild, :)

You really are a god-sent today for me. :) Man, I feel so much happier now; almost, erm, bubbly. :) *giggle*

Very odd, that is; I feel so connected to you now. :) It's like I feel: "Yes, she understands!!" It just really makes me very happy inside. Besides, there's just something so kind in your voice. Not sure what magic healing powers you're using, but they're working! :)

Thank you, yet again!

Sunday, February 12, 2006 8:55 AM

SHADOWCHILD


You can talk to me about River anytime!!!!!!!!! I love that girl with a passion. If you got kicked out for being a River nut REST ASSURED you would not be alone for its likely Id go too.

Sunday, February 5, 2006 1:46 AM

ASARIAN


Hi Anonymous,

It is such a joy to hear from you again! 'bout the other day, I only said I wished I had a name, so I could thank you properly for your valued support!

I'm trying to be brave, feeling like I need to face this all alone. But, meanwhile I am, of course, secretly dying to hear from people! Well, that secret's busted now. :)

Naturally, I'm a bit wary, too; for if people kicked me out here, saying: "We no longer want this River nut," THEN where would I be?! Up go-se creek, for sure! :)

Looking for a good fanvid? Go see this:

http://www.schmackproductions.com/files/this_ismy_sister.wmv

Guaranteed to make you cry; and all those around you along with it.

Friday, February 3, 2006 9:31 PM

ASARIAN


FollowMal,

Thank you so much for your words. :) I really do feel a lot better now. Besides, we're too pretty to die, right? :)

Yeah, the pining thingy. Reminds me of this Seinfeld episode, where Kramer asks: "Do you ever yearn?" I think, now that I officially enter my second week of total FireFly/Serenity addiction, that I can definitely answer: yes, I yearn.

The 'verse, without River, is that empty glass you're holding when you're really, really parched.

P.S. After I read your comforting words, I went and saw me two FireFly episodes again; so I got my fix, and I'm good for a while. :)

Friday, February 3, 2006 5:30 PM

FOLLOWMAL


Your chicken jokes were awesome, Asarian!
And for some reason I've found that pining for the 'verse or for the particular character that drew you in is common.

And we all get blue waiting for more.

We just have to hang in there and it'll happen.
Take care, ok?


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