ZIL'S BLOG

zil

deceitful guts
Wednesday, June 30, 2004

interesting idea, that gut reactions are something to be folowed. I don't think I can trust my gut, I have deceitful guts. they lead me into the middle of four lane highways and tell me to put butter on burns. the other side of the coin was that when we trust out minds instead of our guts we somehow fuck things up.... well my mind is ... trashy. when I was little I used to say I had pretty glass orniments in my mind. I can still see the picture I had of it in my head. shelves and shelves and cases of glass work, with the orange light of sunset flooding through it all splashing a colored glass shadow on the wall of the back of my head. as I grew every pain was one more thoughtless person knocking something over. until now when pretty much all thats left are shards of things that used to be beautiful. I can't trust my mind either. so where do I go? who do I trust when I can't trust myself? dude. brutal.

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