What a night... by JonnyQuest

JONNYQUEST'S BLOG

JonnyQuest

What a night...
Wednesday, February 7, 2007

Okay. So maybe—and I don’t know how this works so please don’t nobody get offended—but maybe, Phoenix Rose did some of the Hoo-Doo that She-Do so well on me. Maybe it was the Captain Morgan. I found myself in a pretty nice hotel last night. I was treated to the next step in our technology. Pretty cool stuff folks. My credit card has a microchip in it as some do these days. My room assignment was stored on my card and it became my card key to the room! Of course the door had a number touchpad for my PIN. Later during the night, I felt an urge to go out and get a drink. Didn’t want to wake Mrs. Quest so I went alone. When I got back, I wanted to make a quiet entrance. I would have succeeded but for one thing. I used the wrong PIN. Suddenly a loud, piercing beep started. Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep. Like a microwave oven that was done cooking and couldn’t shut up about it. It just kept going. The alarm wasn’t coming from the door or the room though. Or even the hallway. It was coming from my credit card. Embedded with the microchip was a tiny beeper. I was a victim of collusion between the credit card companies and the hotel industry! If someone stole my card and tried to use it improperly, the card wouldn’t shut up so no thief would ever want to use it! I was simultaneously annoyed and amazed. This was a fantastic idea! But how do you get it to shut up? I was apparently not destined to know. The beeping became louder and louder until at last I couldn’t’ stand it anymore. I was becoming panicky. Finally the beeping was loud enough that I awoke from my dream. I got up to hit the snooze.

So, before going to bed I was responding to some threads and one of them was Hell’s Kitten’s brief rant on key cards. (I also visited her Flickr site to see what was new and found a pleasant surprise waiting.) I visited Roxy Freefall’s MySpace and read? no watched her latest blog about moving into their new house, and a couple of the outdoor shots inspired the hotel aspect. As did the fireplace pic I posted at the Pub. And did I mention the rum?

But now as I write this, I find that I’m probably going to have to track you down and kill you all for reading this. Because I have revealed to you my million dollar idea and I can let anyone else have it. An easy end to credit fraud. At least some of it. What would that be worth. Well, I have enjoyed your company while it lasted. But now the time has come to end it all. Implanted in this blog is a subliminal signal. I have for months been beaming it to you. With every image I post. You are my thralls. There is, not a “Safe Word”, but an “Initiate Command”. To end yourselves. I’m sorry it came to this but you dear, sweet, wonderful people with your candor and understanding, have contaminated me. I can’t help but put my heart on my sleeve these days and that’s put me in a bad place. I really need to be a millionaire. And you all, well, you are in my way. I’m right sorry about that. Now make your peace.