hopes all well.Reading your blog reminds me of my many moons ago 18 birhtday,met a girl heather ,we just connected .end of story,we bumped into each other over the next two years before i left but i never had the guts too take it further.now 20 years later,no regrets ,(ponders for a second) yeah no regrets the sum of all my roads lead me to me today,which is a good place.peace.

>>>So this article got me wondering two things. The first being "Why doesn't anyone advise men to get to know the woman they're interested in before jumping right into a dinner date?" and the second being "Is it weird that I've never gone on a date with someone I didn't know?"<<<

Hi Rose. First off may I say that I'm so happy things are better since your last blog? :)

Ok, for your first question... I know as a Mom and Grandma that I've advised the young men in my family to get to know the women they're wanting to date first and since my very best relationships have been based upon friendships first, I've suggested this very thing to them. I am hoping that other wise men and women in a young person's life would be doing the same... the tricky part is the young person listening. :)

Second question... no you're smarter than the average person, wise beynd your years and as TheRealMe said above discerning. You're careful to honor what you believe you're looking for and I have immense respect for you because of this.

Rose, it has been my experience that a surprising number of people will go out on a date, or sleep with someone, or even marry someone, because of what are essentially first impressions. They might mistake simple attraction for love. Those butterflies in the stomach, that uneasy almost sickly feeling, is percieved as a sign of true love, or worse, fate.

So a person might get married to his or her "true love" before even discovering some very basic information about them, such as that the other person was (for example) a violent, jealous brute.

A number of my female friends have assured me that their new boyfriend (in one case a former prison inmate) was "wonderful" (without being able to give concrete examples of his "wonderful" actions) only to later complain to me how "he changed".

Now, I'm not saying that chemistry is unimportant, just that it is NOT all-important.

Based on your musings above, it seems that you are the type of person who is a bit more discerning, who is looking for some connection in a relationship beyond the simple physical ones.

Bravo! I think you have an excellent chance at ending up with a good match.
However, it is a harder road to travel, and may take you some time searching.