BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL

LEIASKY

Because of You: Part 2 of 10
Tuesday, June 13, 2006

River finds it hard to contain her jealousy. Simon messes up with Kaylee and Jayne takes advantage.


CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 3274    RATING: 10    SERIES: FIREFLY

I’m trying something new with this post.

This is a collection of vignette’s (posted 10 at a time until we reach 100) that tell their own little story. It begins in the middle of the season, though no specific episode is mentioned. I have purposely left that vague.

The challenge table which gave me the words that prompted each little vignette is listed : Here if you want to see what the upcoming prompts will be.

I don’t expect a lot of people to like or read this because of the tense. It’s hard for me to read much less write. But I wanted to do it just once. Of course, you’d have thought I could choose something other than a 100 PROMPT CHALLENGE to do it with, huh?

I did have fun doing this, but, god I have never been so happy to finish something in my life!

If you make it through all 100, I thank you. I’ve written the prompts so that they create a little series. The first story I saw done like this was one of Mordsith’s. So it is to her I must thank (or curse!) for giving me the idea to try it too!

The last two are listed ‘Writer’s Choice’ but I had my beta give me 10 words which I wrote down on slips of paper and then chose two. It actually worked out really well.

Notes: Mucho thanks to TamSibling for beta’ing this monster that turned into 102 pages by the time I was done with all 100 prompts. Writing in this tense has been one hell of a challenge. One I never wish to ever undertake again.

And thanks to Leighkohl for saving my ass on a few of these prompts and tossing me ideas to keep me going.

---------------

Because of You : Part 2

---------------

011. Jealousy

She watches them from a dark corner, hidden. She won’t be caught, she’s too fast for their eyes – if they were even looking for her. Right now, they are consumed with their conversation, laughing. Kaylee makes him forget about her.

River purses her lips and clenches her fists. She loves Kaylee like a sister. But right now, she wants to claw those pretty green eyes out with her fingernails. River whimpers, knowing this isn’t how she truly feels. But she can’t control it. She can never control it anymore.

She’s afraid – jealous – that Simon is choosing Kaylee over her and she’s scared that she will loose him. But another part of her knows that she isn’t losing a brother, she’s gaining a sister.

She watches them for a moment longer before slipping into her room. She throws herself down onto her bed and squeezes her eyes shut. River can feel the darkness coming. The rage. The uncontrollable anger and fear. She’s broken. And her brother is the only one who can fix her.

She fists her hands into her hair and screams. She knows he will come. Simon will always come when she calls.

It is both a curse and a blessing.

-------------------

012. The Start

He doesn’t remember when he began thinking of Kaylee as someone with whom he wanted to be more than a friend. He supposes the feelings grew over time – a long amount of time – but not really.

She’d flirted the moment she’d seen him on Persephone. And he supposes that her bright eyes and eager smile are the reason he booked passage on the Firefly.

He kept to himself back then, closed off, reserved. Falling in with criminals had not been his plan. But things hadn’t gone as planned since he’d gotten River out of the Academy. He was getting used to it. And he was one of those criminals now, even though he has little to do with the jobs other than to patch up the hurt that inevitably follows the Captain back to his ship after a delivery gone wrong.

He is grateful to the Captain for letting them stay. On the move he and River are harder to catch. And he needs to keep River safe.

From the day she was born he’d proclaimed himself her protector. He’d always looked after her. And he would look after her still until his dying day. She was his little sister and he wouldn’t let anyone take her from him again.

But his determination keeps him blind to the fact that it isn’t her that will be taken from him. He will be taken from her.

--------------------

013. The End

In his nightmares, it ends in bloodshed. In the deaths of everyone he loves. Caught and executed for crimes against a corrupt government intent on keeping their carefully guarded secrets. He wakes swathed in sweat, trembling from the chill that lingers in his heart at the memory.

River is always there at the end. Holding him, curling her body around him and telling him it will be all right.

In his dreams, the nightmare that they live ends happily; with his sister healed; smiling and dancing like he remembers; all beauty and grace resuming her rightful place in the society where she was raised.

Kaylee sits with an endless supply of strawberries brought to her on a platter larger than she could ever imagine. When she turns that brilliant smile on him, his heart melts, and when she runs into his arms, he forgets to breathe.

Mal and Inara bicker in the privacy of their shuttle. Wash and Zoe have the little one they have always wanted. Shepherd Book has found what he journeyed out into the Black to find. And even Jayne has an endless supply of whores to keep him happy.

He wakes panting heavily and a heavy sigh falls from his lips as he looks around the small room. None of it is real. It never is. And somewhere deep inside his heart, he knows it never will be.

------------------

014. The Past

His past is a distant memory. But one he can recall with a striking clarity that causes a sharp jab to the chest in his weaker moments. He misses the stability of a home that doesn’t constantly move, of a job that pays ridiculously well. He never had to want for anything in that life. In this one, it is a struggle from day to day just to put even the blandest food on the table.

On days like today, where River’s latest breakdown brings even the captain’s considerable temper down on his young shoulders, Simon misses his past life. Guilt for even thinking those thoughts consumes him and he is glad River is sleeping, so she can not see the pain on his face, the regret in his eyes.

He wouldn’t give up his sister for all of the wealth in the ‘verse. He’s given up everything he is for her and he’s never regretted that decision. But there are some days when he remembers his past life and wishes, for moments so fleeting they can barely be counted, that he was back in that sterile, bland environment living an equally boring, mundane life.

Kaylee’s gentle touch draws him from his guilty musings and he offers her a small smile. Yet again, she has the uncanny ability to lift his spirits with something as little as a squeeze of his hand. She makes him forget what he was – the past that he left behind, and forces him to think about who he is now.

Sitting beside her, talking and laughing, enlivens him in a way he can never remember feeling in that old life, and he is glad to have met her, glad that his troubles brought him to her – and he lowers his head in guilt once again.

It isn’t fair for him to snatch a few moments of happiness out of this new life, when his sister is suffering so horribly.

---------------------

015. The Future

He doesn’t know what it holds – the future. It’s always in motion, fluid, changing. The only certainty in his life is that his sister will continue to have her breaks with reality, the Captain and Inara will continue to fight, rather than talk about their feelings for one another. Jayne will never change – will always want off the ship at the next stop, eager to greet the whores he knows on seemingly every planet.

Wash and Zoe will fight and love so intensely it nearly pains Simon to witness. The future he wants to spend with Kaylee is clouded with doubt, insecurity and guilt. It doesn’t matter how hard he tries, how much he tries to prepare, he puts his foot in his mouth at the most inopportune moment and the one step he thinks he’s taken toward her only results in him taking two steps further back.

He can’t deny the attraction, the feelings growing against his better judgment, for the eternally happily mechanic. But he can’t shake the overwhelming guilt when he feels like he’s abandoning his sister, even when he knows she’s sound asleep.

Those few pleasant moments mean more to him than he can ever express in words. And he longs for the day when he will have the confidence and conviction to tell her how he really feels - without the guilt associated with such an admission.

He hopes that day will come. Because as time passes, all he wants to do is lose himself in Kaylee’s pretty emerald eyes and tell her that he loves her.

-----------------

016. Current

Yet again, they’ve come back with wounds a plenty. Book acts as his assistant, the calm ability to tolerate the sight of gushing wounds seemingly coming from somewhere none of them have ever had enough courage to ask about. Together, they bind a leg wound, a shoulder and one to the gut that has Inara’s lovely dark eyes worried with deep concern.

The crew hovers outside the infirmary, waiting, as one by one the injured are sent out. Zoe limps into Wash’s arms and he leads her to the common room couch. Jayne growls his obscenities at the doctor as his shoulder is cleaned, bound and wrapped, and then he, too is kicked out of the infirmary. Kaylee goes to him, leads him gently to the large chair opposite Wash and Zoe, her wide eyes big with fear. She misses the longing look Jayne gives her after she helps him to sit and then turns back toward the infirmary. A plan formulates in his mind, piercing even through the drugs that have scrambled most of his thoughts.

Hours pass in relative silence as Simon works to clean and irrigate the Captain’s wound. His vitals are stable and once he is certain the greater danger has passed, steps out of the infirmary to inform those waiting impatiently for a prognosis.

Simon isn’t sure who breathes a heavier sigh of relief when he informs them the captain will live. Inara and Kaylee stand close, gleaning support from one another’s presence. They want to see him and Simon agrees – only a short visit as the man needs his rest.

He watches as the two women lean over him from either side, grasping his hands and whispering words Simon cannot hear from this distance.

Book clasps him on the shoulder and smiles. “Good job, son.”

It is in this capacity he is most useful and Simon feels an overwhelming sense of relief at hearing those words. He offers the Shepherd a small smile before stepping back into the infirmary – into the one place he feels the most at home.

-------------------

017. Illness

The stupid, pigheaded man tries to do too much and pulls his stitches. Simon’s annoyance with him grows tenfold when Jayne refuses to listen to the simplest of instructions. Snapping at the injured man doesn’t ingratiate him any further into Kaylee’s good graces. It has rather the opposite effect and Simon doesn’t truly have the time to make her understand. Between caring for two other wounded patients, the pig-headed one, and his sister’s bouts with insanity, something has to wait.

Lying in the infirmary, delirious from an infected gunshot wound and fever, Jayne mutters beneath his breath, stealing glances at River as she sits demurely on the counter watching him with hawk-like eyes.

Simon bustles around the infirmary, checking blood samples, fluids and medication levels when Kaylee enters the room. She doesn’t even glance his way, instead goes straight to Jayne and takes his hand, giving him one of her bright, supernova smiles.

Kaylee leans over the sick man, touching his cheek, reassuring him that he will get better. Jayne’s head lolls to one side and he catches the disgusted look Simon throws at him. He smiles stupidly, knowing the inept doctor has done something, yet again, to annoy the pretty mechanic.

Mildly annoyed the doctor refuses to leave the infirmary, Jayne leans closer to Kaylee, taking in her beautiful face and her bright, expressive eyes. As he opens his mouth to slur something, the motion to his other side breaks his already tenuous concentration.

Simon doesn’t look up from his chart but Jayne knows the man is listening, straining to hear what is going on between them.

But it is River’s voice they all hear, directed at Jayne.

“Not yours to take.” The girl’s brown eyes bore straight through the mercenary.

Jayne snorts at her and tightens his grip on Kaylee’s hand.

River shakes her head and steps out of the room. Kaylee doesn’t understand what she meant but Simon does. She only hopes he can fix what he broke before it’s too late.

---------------------

018. Health

Jayne’s infection rages and the lack of appropriate medication keeps Simon up at all hours, mixing and blending drugs so that they will work in the place of those he does not have. The man-ape continues to antagonize Simon, working the young doctor’s annoyance to a fevered pitch, until he finally cracks – at the wrong moment.

The uncanny ability to get Simon to snap at him just as Kaylee enters earshot is something, even in his drug-induced stupor, Jayne is proud of.

Jayne smiles smugly when Kaylee hisses at Simon to leave him alone and then turns her sweet smile on the injured man lying so helpless in the bed.

Everyone’s wounds are slightly infected due to the lack of suitable antibiotics and the lack of money to purchase any. Jayne, of course, is in much worse condition due to him being impossible to deal with.

Book can see Simon’s agitation and offers to help, but there isn’t much the Shepherd can do but sit with River. Simon is the doctor and must tend to his physically injured patients before returning to the care of the mentally traumatized one.

They need proper medication and with three of their crew out for the count, those uninjured gather in the galley to formulate a plan. Simon, once again demonstrating an uncanny propensity to criminal activities, suggests something that just might work.

Wash disagrees that he should go alone, as does Kaylee, but neither of them are able to counter with a better idea. Simon knows the medication that is needed. He can pose as a well-spoken and Core-bred doctor. He can get in and out of there quicker.

They break and Simon returns to his patients, ignoring Kaylee when she calls out to him, wanting to talk. He doesn’t want to hear her complain about his decision – or even worse, talk about how Jayne’s condition is worsening. If he wants to save his patients, even Jayne’s miserable life, he needs to do this.

He’s too busy to deal with his annoyance at her behavior and his jealousy. He knows what Jayne is doing and he’d been wrong in thinking Kaylee could see right through the sick man’s agenda.

He’ll talk with her later. Even though it pains him to watch her walk away, he again throws himself into his work. He can’t split his concentration right now. He can’t focus on her or them or whatever was happening in his addled heart, not right now, but he would. When he got back with the medication needed to save the injured member’s of Serenity’s crew.

--------------------

019. Fight

The longing feeling that washes over him as he enters the hospital is one he’d hoped he wouldn’t fee l– though it is not unexpected. Before he’d gone after River, he’d spent his life in facilities like this – well, not quite like this. He’d worked in one of the best hospitals in the Core, and now he was a fugitive sneaking into a medical facility to steal enough drugs to keep three members of his crew alive.

Never again can he work in a place like this and it tugs at his heart. He nods politely as he moves through the crowded halls. He looks like he knows where he’s going. He is confident and certain of his actions, so unlike most of his time on Serenity. He even stops to consult with a local doctor about his sick patient.

With so many people, Simon worries that he won’t be able to get what he needs. But with so many people it makes it easier to slip into certain places unnoticed. He takes just enough medicine to get by, knowing this hospital will not be as readily supplied as those situated within the heart of the Core, and makes his way toward the exit. The throng of people blocking his escape causes a worried frown to dampen his otherwise stoic face and unfortunately someone notices.

He should have known it wouldn’t be easy. Their plans never go off without a hitch. Getting in was the easy part, but the pretty little receptionist who catches him on the way out, and who he attempts to poorly flirt with in order to escape, knows something is a little – off, about the handsome man.

She calls security after a moment of listening to the cute foreign doctor’s advances and once they have his arms bound behind his back, rounds her desk and places a not-so-chaste kiss to his astonished lips.

“Another time, another place, maybe, cutie,” she draws her finger down his chest, a sad but contemplative look on her face.

And that is the last thing he sees before the butt of a gun collides with the back of his head, rendering him quite unconscious.

----------------

020. Still

If he stays completely still, maybe they won’t notice that he’s awoken. His ribs burn and it hurts to breathe. But he hasn’t spoken. He’s sure they don’t know who he is. He hopes they don’t know – otherwise there was no way he would ever escape.

He has no idea where he is or who has him. He tries to listen to their voices but they are muffled and he is in too much pain to fully concentrate. Even when they are in the room, large, rough men that creepily remind him of Jayne, stand over him. They ask him questions he refuses to answer, and still others he wouldn’t even begin to know how to answer.

During the brief moments he is left alone, all he can think of his how he will escape this dirty prison. His mind is consumed with the thought. It is all he can think about but his head still rings from the beatings he has sustained and it makes it very difficult to formulate a plan.

It doesn’t matter if they beat him to death. He will not give up the location of his friends – of the crew, or his sister. He will go to a bloody and violent grave before he turns them in. He reverts to a calm place he has managed to carve out of the constant throbbing pain in his body, only for a few moments at a time. Like in his dreams, he sees his sister happy and healthy, and a smiling Kaylee who is no longer mad at him.

It doesn’t matter if he is awake or asleep, they still come again, and beat him into consciousness until he cries out. The pain is too great and eventually his eyes close, his breathing stills and he collapses to the floor at his tormentor’s feet.

TBC

------------

Liked it? Hated it? Have some constructive criticism? Love to hear it! No comments = no next part! Nyah!

This one was shorter than the last, but, they tend to get much longer.

Each character will appear in this series of stories, some more than others.

This type of story/tense is new for me, and no, once this is done I will not be writing in this horrible tense ever again!

COMMENTS

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 5:44 AM

MECHANICGIRLKAYLEE


Oh dear.

So much emotion.

I'm interested to see where you'll take this.

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 10:25 AM

LEIGHKOHL


Oh my, these ones are chock full of lovely Simon angst! And the Jayne angle just made me bristle, I so wanted to say,NO!NO!NO!and shake Simon into acting not like a boob! I have to say, though that Jealousy was a very intriguing piece. It shed some light on River's character and how even though her mind has still been tampered with and is muddle she still has the ability for some coherent thoughts and even emotions. They are so very true to her situation, she is young and fearful of what may come, so she clings to the one person who is her protector, her beacon of hope, the one that keeps her safe, and she doesn't want to share. It lays another dimension to what keeps Simon and Kaylee apart and I find it a very interesting take on their relationship. The past was also a personal favorite of mine, the solace he finds in Kaylee and his guilt for it, so perfectly Simon! Oh and I sooo want to beat up Jayne, but I am sure he can take me! And now Simon is unconscious, OH NO!! Love your work and can't wait to read the next post!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 1:11 PM

ALLIETHORN7


I have no clue where you plan to go with this. Usualy with angst like this, I can get a pretty good idea of how it will end (I may be wrong, but I still have an idea!). But, this time 'round, I haven't the foggiest. OBH, Simon is SCREWED, whatwith being captured and the crew out (those wounds leave Kaylee, Inara, Book, and River to go on some big damn rescue... okay, maybe not so screwed, but still in some big damn trouble!

-Danny

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 1:16 PM

LEIASKY


>I have no clue where you plan to go with this.

Well if you already knew, where would be the fun?! :)

Tuesday, June 13, 2006 3:35 PM

FRELLINGBLONDE


Ack! Angst! But I have faith that you would NEVER write Jaylee. Or at least not let it end that way...right? *whimpers*

More more more!

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 12:40 AM

RIVERISMYGODDESS


Here's my response from yesterday when the site went all bendy.

*But right now, she wants to claw those pretty green eyes out with her fingernails.*

Very good River ^thought^ in Jealousy.

*A plan formulates in his mind, piercing even through the drugs that have scrambled most of his thoughts.*

^This line^ from Current makes me think of the way that I have seen EVERY Jaylee fic begin.

It seems to me that these prompts are in a very good order for your story.

The scene in Fight reminds me of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, when the Jones' are tied up in the Nazi castle and Harrison Ford gets a kiss then gets punched.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006 5:19 AM

SILLYLITTLEDUCK


Whoa, River being jealous? Takes me a bit to wrap my head around.

"he forgets to breathe"<--- major *gasp* of cuteness!!! oh the warm fuzzies abounding

"Kaylee’s gentle touch draws him from his guilty musings" can we say 'hubba hubba'? *wink* i adore how simon basically worships kaylee. EVERY women wants to be thought of the way simon thinks of Kaylee in you fics

"one to the gut that has Inara’s lovely dark eyes worried" love this!!!

"Jayne snorts at her and tightens his grip on Kaylee’s hand." I like that your finally adding the Jayne element. I am NOT a jaylee shipper, but ignoring his intrest in kaylee is just as annoying sometimes, so I personally ADORED that part.

"Jayne, of course, is in much worse condition due to him being impossible to deal with." Simon thinking of going back on his deal w/ jayne. Laughed at loud reading this whole particular prompt.

*gasp* ...simon?





Wednesday, June 14, 2006 8:38 PM

BLUEEYEDBRIGADIER


Oh Hell...things are well on their way down the flusher here:(

Gotta admit, Leiasky....your introduction of River's jealousy mixed with rational thought was wonderful, in that it's perfectly plausible that River would try to find as much stability through Simon as possible. And Kaylee making Simon feel all bibbledy? Not that great for mental stability;)

Jayne....not really surprising Jayne would take advantage of Kaylee getting cheezed at Simon. Just surprised that Joss & co. didn't have Jayne make more...active attempts (cuz for all we know, there were Jayne powered attempts at flirting with Kaylee in the series) at wooing lil' Miss Frye;)

BEB

Saturday, June 24, 2006 7:54 AM

TAMSIBLING


>>It isn’t fair for him to snatch a few moments of happiness out of this new life, when his sister is suffering so horribly.

I know people have said that River is a martyr, but I personally think Simon has got the market cornered - especially with lines like the one above.

And I know that you love to torture Simon, but please ... Oh what is the point? You've already caused him pain aplenty - *sigh* I will resign myself to simply wishing him all the best as you continue to beat him senseless!

And Jayne - blech! I could kick him - well, maybe I couldn't, but I bet if I asked River, she'd do it!

Thursday, July 13, 2006 4:36 AM

BLACKBEANIE


I really like it


POST YOUR COMMENTS

You must log in to post comments.

YOUR OPTIONS

OTHER FANFICS BY AUTHOR

Threesome
Simon and Kaylee discuss other - avenues, as they lay in bed. Oddly, this is a pretty PG story.

Moan
Simon and kaylee disturb the ship with their nocturnal activities. Post BDM. Part of a challenge table. Rated NC-17 for adult content.

Broken Wings: Conclusion (Repost)
The crew take Kaylee home to be buried and the reason for Simon's secrecy is discovered. Sequel to 'On the Edge'. Cannon pairings.

Broken Wings: Chapter 18 (Repost)
Simon, Mal and Jayne have a moment with Kaylee. Inara and River are reunited with the rest of the crew. Sequel to 'On the Edge'. Cannon pairings.

Broken Wings: Chapter 17 (Repost)
Simon has a conversation with Zoe, Mal and Jayne - separately. Sequel to 'On the Edge.' Cannon pairings.

Broken Wings: Chapter 16 (Repost)
The crew is reunited - mostly, as Simon arrives to treat the wounded. River rushes to Inara's aid before her deception is discovered. Sequel to 'On the Edge'. Cannon pairings.

Broken Wings: Chapter 15 (Repost)
Simon's escape is halted by his father. But River comes to the rescue. Jayne - sees the light - far too up close and personal for his safety. Sequel to 'On the Edge'. Cannon pairings.

Broken Wings: Chapter 14 (Repost)
Simon and Inara's deception is discovered. Mal, Jayne and Zoe continue to fight what looks to be a losing battle. Sequel to 'On the Edge'. Cannon pairings.

Broken Wings: Chapter 13 (Repost)
Simon has some unexpected help with his fussy son and River receives another assignment. Sequel to 'On the Edge'. Cannon pairings.

Broken Wings: Chapter 12 (Repost)
Inara and Simon continue their work while a message gets out to those on the front lines. Sequel to 'On the Edge'. Cannon pairings.