I’m trying something new with this post.

This is a collection of vignette’s (posted 10 at a time until we reach 100) that tell their own little story. It begins in the middle of the season, though no specific episode is mentioned. I have purposely left that vague.

The challenge table which gave me the words that prompted each little vignette is listed: here if you want to see what the upcoming prompts will be.

I don’t expect a lot of people to like or read this because of the tense. It’s hard for me to read much less write. But I wanted to do it just once. Of course, you’d have thought I could choose something other than a 100 PROMPT CHALLENGE to do it with, huh?

I did have fun doing this, but, god I have never been so happy to finish something in my life!

If you make it through all 100, I thank you. I’ve written the prompts so that they create a little series. The first story I saw done like this was one of Mordsith’s. So it is to her I must thank (or curse!) for giving me the idea to try it too!

The last two are listed ‘Writer’s Choice’ but I had my beta give me 10 words which I wrote down on slips of paper and then chose two. It actually worked out really well.

Notes: Mucho thanks to TamSibling for beta’ing this monster that turned into 102 pages by the time I was done with all 100 prompts. Writing in this tense has been one hell of a challenge. One I never wish to ever undertake again.

And thanks to Leighkohl for saving my ass on a few of these prompts and tossing me ideas to keep me going.

---------------

Because of You Part 3

--------------

021. Lonely

He misses their late night conversations, the days he sits beside her just watching her face, her pretty eyes. He misses the sound of her voice as she laughs and the delicate touch when she slaps his shoulder or holds his hand.

They didn’t part well and amidst all of the physical pain his body has endured, this emotional pain is the worst. He is all alone now; with his thoughts, his regrets. He resolves that if he is ever given the chance to see her again, that he will tell her everything that is in his heart – even if it means inserting and prying that foot out of his mouth until he gets it right.

He’s longed to do it for so long, but so much – and it seems so inconsequential now – has stood in the way.

With a painful finality, he knows he may never get the chance to make a fool of himself or realize his dream of being with her. There is really no one to rescue him. Three of Serenity’s crew are injured far too badly to come after him. Kaylee and Inara are not fighters, which leaves Book and Wash and while Simon doesn’t know where he is, he at least knows, by the amount of voices he hears outside the door, that the place is heavily fortified.

Grateful, or maybe not, to be left alone with his thoughts, they quickly turn toward River. He knows his sister would never be alone if he died in this place. But the thought does nothing to temper the fear growing in his gut. He’d sworn to protect her, to take her away from the danger that follows seemingly on their heels. Her safety is his responsibility and his alone. He can’t leave her on Serenity all alone.

As the interrogators return, Simon resolves that he will never give her up, never betray her.

And then the beatings begin again and he forgets everything but the pain.

------------------------

022. Hunger

They starve him in an effort to get him to talk. But there is nothing he says that gives them any indication that he knows the answers to their questions.

He’s had very little time for rest – they don’t let him. That calm place he’s formed in the corner of his mind is slowly closing in around him. The pain is too great for him to concentrate on it for too long. But he still struggles, even when they beat him, question him, to picture Kaylee’s smiling face, the gentle way she touches his arm, his hand, the coy looks she delivers from beneath her eyelashes.

He wishes now that he had done so many things differently. Hindsight explains the injury that foresight would have prevented. He remembers the quote from a book he’d read long ago and reflects that in his case, the words are so very true. If he’d only been honest with her, if only he could have forced himself to snatch a little bit of happiness out of the nightmare his life had become. But now it’s too late. He doesn’t think he will ever get a chance to tell her how he feels.

Perhaps it is poetic justice. He’s never been good at talking to girls – except his sister, and she didn’t count. Even the affairs – liaisons really, he’d had while he was in medical school really never caused him to stumble so poorly over his words. But he knows why. With a sudden clarity granted to those only on the precipice of death, he knows that it is because he never loved any of those women as much as he loves Serenity’s pretty mechanic.

Squinting at his interrogators through swollen eyes, he can see the glint of metal and knows that a new kind of questioning is about to begin.

-----------------------

023. Vampire

They bleed his body like a vampire from old Earth-That-Was tales. It weakens him. He knows they want information and thus far he has not given anything away. But he knows he won’t be able to last much longer. The cuts along his torso will be infected within a day if they are not treated. And so far they have treated none of the injuries they have inflicted.

He begins to curse the shape he’s in, the strength in his lithe body. The pain is so great that he simply wishes he could die. And they don’t give him anything to dull the pain. But his interrogators won’t let him go so easily and soon he begins to think about the ways he would prefer to die. He even tells them, breathing weakly through dry lips. Based on the way the beatings continue, he doesn’t think they are amused with his sarcasm.

But before he has a chance to contemplate further, a bright light descends like an angel from above, striking his face, making him squint to see the identity of his savior. Muffled voices echo around him, gunshots and the sound of snapping bones, but he is lying in such a position on the floor, that movement toward the sound is near impossible.

Strong, steady hands lift him to his feet and the voice directed at him is firm and questioning. He recognizes those hands, the color of that skin and he looks up into the man’s dark eyes. Simon’s parched lips struggle to form the words he so desperately wants to voice. And after several tries, he succeeds. “Tell her I’m sorry.” His breath comes in gasps but he repeats the plea, hoping the man will be able to deliver his message. “I’m sorry.”

“I will, son.” The voice is strong, confident, as are the arms that hold his body upright. “But you’ll be able to tell her yourself soon enough.”

Simon glances around at the bodies littering his feet but his strength fades and he instead passes out before they have even left the building.

---------------------

024. Day

He can hear them calling him. Voices trying to pull him back from the unconscious bliss into which he’d fallen. He groans and feels a moist cloth pressed against his forehead. He doesn’t want to wake. Waking will bring more unbearable pain – in his heart as well as his body.

Then he hears her voice penetrating the fog of blackness which surrounds his mind. It buoys him and he inhales sharply at the gentle touch against his bruised skin. Though swollen shut, with a warm compress he is able to open his eyes, if only to little slits.

Her face comes into focus, all scrunched with concern. He knows she is speaking to him, asking him how he is. He can feel no pain and knows he has been given a pain block. His eyes close and his body relaxes, content to listen to the sweet sound of her voice as he descends back into unconsciousness.

When he wakes again, she is still beside him. She is still talking to him as if he had never fallen asleep – maybe he hadn’t? – and he closes his eyes again to enjoy the sweet sound, but the only words he truly remembers send a sharp spike through his heart.

“Jayne’s real sick, Simon. We need to give ‘im some of this new medicine. What ones do we give ‘em? An how much?”

He can feel the wet cloth slide to his lips, giving him some much needed moisture in hopes that he will voice some kind of answer.

Doesn’t she realize what she’s doing to him? He’s disoriented from the drugs but is unwilling to consider that of all the words she’s said, those were the first and more important out of her mouth. What had he done to turn her opinion of him so quickly? Why was she more concerned with Jayne than him?

The light of a new day brings a new kind of pain and Simon wishes he could just close his eyes and succumb to the blackness of his dreams.

------------------

025. Night

He doesn’t know what time it is when he wakes. He doesn’t know if it is day or night. He imagines they are once again floating through the blackness of space, away from the place where he’d very nearly died. The lights have been turned down but they are still far too bright for him to open his eyes too wide – if he even could.

He can remember snippets of conversation, some directed at him, some merely taking place within earshot. But the only real memory he has of his rescue is of his heart ripping in two when Kaylee seemed to be more concerned for Jayne’s health than his. Something changed, something broke in him then and now he isn’t sure if he wants to go on. Something inside of him wishes he was still back on the planet, in the hands of his captors.

He squeezes his eyes shut against the tears of shame and pain that well in his chest. He can feel someone moving about the room, can feel the brush of hands against his face, the lips against his cheek. He forces his eyes open and is surprised when a slim finger brushes away the solitary tear that escapes against his will.

He gulps as his vision clears and tries to smile when River leans her forehead against his.

“You are such a boob,” she whispers and brushes another cold compress across his face, touching his still chapped lips with a gentleness that makes him sob.

“I –“ He tries to speak but she shushes him with a finger to his lips.

“Told us what we needed to know. Everyone will be ok. You saved them.”

Simon shakes his head. He cannot remember telling them anything. He can’t remember anything but that piercing pain in his heart. He doesn’t want to think about Kaylee but he can’t help it. He wants to ask about her, but he is afraid. Instead, he closes his eyes and sighs, hoping the darkness of unconsciousness will envelope him in its loving arms.

Just before he falls asleep, she whispers to him, “Love you.”

He wishes he could find the energy to repeat the words. But with his mind focused entirely on a woman he thinks he’s lost, he can’t voice them. They simply hurt too much to say.

----------------------

026. Dark

Darkness encroaches on his heart as his moments of consciousness last minutes now instead of seconds – though he doesn’t open his eyes. He is well drugged against any pain and is breathing well enough. He knows he will need to speak to whoever has been charged with his care but he just hasn’t wanted to. With a heavy sigh, he opens his eyes only to find a pair of wide green ones staring back at him.

He inhales sharply, expecting to see his sister. When he averts his gaze, a hand slides around his chin and turns his head. He can see the tears well in those bright green orbs and he wonders why she is shedding a single one for him.

“Don’t you ever scare me like that again, Simon Tam,” Kaylee scolds him, clutching his hand almost painfully.

Why is she here, he wonders. She was more concerned for Jayne when he could scarcely open his eyes. He turns his head away again and closes his eyes, not wanting to see her pretty face or hear her sweet voice.

It is like nails on a chalkboard to him now and he trembles at the painful thought.

Kaylee sits with him for a long time, brushing her fingers over his cheek, making him feel loved and wanted. With the conflicted thoughts rampaging through his head, it takes him a long, long time to fall asleep.

----------------------

027. Light

What happens when the doctor becomes the patient? Simon has never really been in this position before. He has always been the caregiver, always snapped orders, prescribed treatment.

In the light of a new day he is more coherent. Kaylee is nowhere to be seen and Simon doesn’t expect to see her. He thinks she has made her decision. She doesn’t belong to him. She never really has. He really shouldn’t have expected her to wait forever for him to permanently remove his foot from his mouth. But the realization of this fact he believes so readily doesn’t make it any easier for him to breathe.

His chest feels so heavy, like the weight of this knowledge will crush him at any moment. And seeing River doesn’t make him feel any better. It’s worse, if that is possible. Because the guilt he feels at obsessing over someone else while she still needs him tugs at what’s left of his shattered heart.

River is at his side, seemingly oblivious to his internal musings, smiling happily at him, holding and squeezing his hand. Her boney fingers brush across his bruised cheek and she leans down to kiss his forehead.

Out of the corner of his eye he sees another move to his side.

Book looks down at the doctor. “Good to see you awake. We need you to diagnose your injuries and tell us what medicines you need.”

Simon nods and rattles off a list of medications and dosages. Guiltily, he has Book overdose him with one of the medications they have aplenty, so he will sleep away the pain Kaylee’s absence creates in his heart. He knows its wrong to do so, but with the emotional and physical pain of his situation – one that he has never before experienced on this level – he doesn’t know what else to do.

-----------------

028. Shadow

A darkness passes over his face as he wakes again. With a moan, he shifts his head into the shadow and keeps his eyes closed tight. He can feel pain this time and he tries to go back to sleep but the press of broken ribs into his side makes him gasp.

“Simon?”

He tenses. He can’t do this. He can’t see her. Not now. Why does she insist on being here every time he wakes?

“Could you get River?” he asks, not looking at her.

“Here, Simon.”

And she is. When he turns his head toward the voice and opens his eyes, he sees his beautiful mei mei. Slowly, he asks her to give him some more pain medication, carefully avoiding Kaylee who sits patiently on his other side.

River frowns at him, knowing he has instructed her to give him too much so that he will fall asleep quickly. But she stares at her brother and scowls at him, while filling the syringe with half the dosage and pushing it into his IV line. When she attempts to move away, he grasps her hand and stares at her almost desperately.

“Stay, mei mei.” He feels almost guilty for trying to use River as a buffer and by the look on her face she knows exactly what he is trying to do.

“Kaylee is here. She can keep you company.” Without another word, River extricates her hand from his and walks out of the room, leaving him staring uncomfortably at the space she has just vacated.

----------------

029. Space

She closes the space between them, cupping her hand beneath his cheek. He doesn’t look at her. It’s too painful.

“Simon?” She’s been trying for days to get his attention, to speak with him. She curls her hand into his and frowns when he doesn’t even acknowledge she has touched him. A flinch and a tensing of his hand is all she gets in return for the gesture.

She knows, she remembers, the past, when he would tremble when they were close. It is her little secret. She’s never told him she can feel it, sense it, and the absence of it now hurts her in a way she cannot explain.

Only today has he been able to stay awake long enough to really rebuff her attempts to speak with him. Only today has he really had a chance to think about why she would even care enough to spend so much time in here with him.

“I’m tired, Kaylee,” he says, staring at the wall. “Please go.”

He doesn’t see a question formulating on her lips nor does he notice the tears welling in her pretty green eyes. “K. I’ll be back later,” she assures him. And he misses the pained look she gives him before releasing his hand.

He wonders why she is so determined. Although he knows her kind heart would extend to him regardless of what has or has not passed between them. Sometimes he wishes she was not so kind to him. It would make their parting far less painful.

“A blank or empty area,” River is suddenly beside him, glancing down into the eyes that shift toward her. She flattens her hand lightly on his chest, over his heart, careful not to press on his bruised ribs. “She lives in here. Don’t push her away.” Even though it is difficult, River pushes away the tiny sliver of jealousy trying to rear its ugly head. Simon is not hers alone. And she knows, she accepts that. In most of her heart, she is happy for him.

“River –“ He doesn’t want to talk about this. Not now. Not ever. He just wants it to go away. All of the pain and the heartache.

“Love you,” River says with a smile.

Despite how much it hurts, he nods and gives her the response he knows she’s been fishing for. “Love you too, mei mei.”

But the knife in his heart twists and turns painfully as he says the words. He wants so desperately to say them to Kaylee but he knows he’s forfeited his chance.

“Not yet,” River says with a smile that tries to pierce the barrier he has erected around his emotions and he is not sure whether to believe her, or be afraid of what she could possibly mean.

---------------------

030. Coffin

The crew is healing nicely. Zoe is up and walking around with only a minor limp. Even Jayne, Book tells Simon, is back to being his normal grumbly, insulting self. Only Simon and the Captain, who has been moved to one of the passenger dorms so that he won’t have to navigate the ladder to his bunk with a gut wound, are still relatively bed bound.

Simon grins when Mal enters the infirmary and gingerly sits down on a stool next to Simon.

“Feelin’ that room closin’ in like a coffin. ‘Nara an lil’ Kaylee keepin’ me there. ‘bout ready to go crazy.”

“I’m crazy. Only room for one crazy on Serenity.” River dances into the room and holds out a needle to her brother.

Simon nods and instructs her how much medication to administer before returning his attention to Mal.

After a moment, Mal speaks. “You done good. Saved us an almost died yourself in the meantime.”

Simon stares at the captain. Hearing praise come out of the obstinate man's mouth, especially directed at him, is something he thinks he imagines. He sits there in silence for a moment pondering the rare words.

Unable to take the silence, Mal’s eyes narrow. “What?”

“One moment, Captain,” Simon raises a hand. “Give me a moment.” The drugs continue to make Simon far more loose-lipped and sarcastic that he’s ever been before – at least to any member of the crew. “I'm taking a moment to bask in the glow of your approval.” He takes a deep breath, relieved when there is no urge to cough. It means his lungs are healing.

Mal scowls at Simon and pushes himself to his feet – apparently he doesn’t like his medic’s sarcastic side – and marches toward the door. Before exiting, he turns and levels a stern glare at the other man. “Best be talkin’ to lil’ Kaylee. She’s tore up plenty over you bein’ so hurt. Reckon she could use some a that charming personality.”

And then he is gone, leaving Simon to wonder just how he will ever be able to have a normal – for him anyway – conversation with the lovely mechanic ever again, especially now.

TBC

--------------

Liked it? Hated it? Have some constructive criticism? Love to hear it! No comments = no next part! Nyah!

This one was shorter than the last, but, they tend to get much longer.

Each character will appear in this series of stories, some more than others.

This type of story/tense is new for me, and no, once this is done I will not be writing in this horrible tense ever again!