Title: Da Bien Hua (Big Changes) Series Title: My Valentine Author: Humbug Rating: NC-17 Fandom: Firefly Pairing: Jayne/Kaylee Word Count: 2340 Summary: Kaylee and Jayne's relationship Disclaimer: Joss is Boss. I'm just borrowing his characters for fun!! Warning: Jaylee sexiness! Is it getting hot in here?!

Authors note: Thanks to bookaddict43 for betaing.

Read the previous chapters posted at my Live Journal.

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I just watched ‘Something New’, and this sexy film gave me some wicked ideas.

Jayne plans a surprise for Kaylee on Valentines. Other characters pop in and out. I’ve got the fanfic writing bug. Enjoy!!

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Da Bien Hua = big changes

Pi hua = shit

Yun fu = pregnant woman

Hun-dan = bastard

Bao-bei = darling

Ai ren = spouse / lover / sweetheart / soulmate

Xin-gan = Darling

ding hun = engaged / betrothed

xi-xin = attentive

jie hun = get married

Gong xi = congratulations

xie xie = thanks

wu jia zhi bao = priceless treasure

tian tang = paradise/ heaven

mei li = beautiful

hue li = gorgeous

xi shi = wedding/ happy occasion

wu jia zhi bao = priceless treasure

Yu xin teng, ai ren. = I love you with all of my heart, sweetheart!

Yu xin teng, bao-bai yun fu = I love you with all of my heart, my darling pregnant wife!

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Da Bien Hua (Big Changes)

Jayne knocked on Inara’s shuttle door. When there was no answer he knocked again and slowly pushed open the door, glancing inside as he did so.

“Inara?” he called out, “Wash said you needed somethin’ fixin’ in ya shuttle?”

Then he saw her, kneeling on the floor with her silk robe pooled around her hips. Ai ya, she was a hua li woman! In front of her was a bowl of warm water and a sponge. She picked it up and gently squeezed the water over her tanned shoulder. Jayne was transfixed as he watched the water cascade down her shoulders and back. He knew it was all kindsa wrong, but he couldn’t take his eyes off her. In the past this would have been his ultimate fantasy….

Inara looked back over her shoulder and saw him standing there. “Would you like to help me wash my back?”

He knew he should just turn and walk out of there, run, but he was fixed to the spot. His brain had left and his John Thomas was doing all his thinking for him.

“Jayne, I’m not asking you to have sex with me,” she teased. “Just help me get to some hard to reach places.”

He felt himself moving forward, taking the sponge and gently cleaning her olive skin.

She gasped as she felt his fingers lightly graze her skin. “Jayne!” she shivered.

“Ya cold?”

She shook her head and smiled at him.

From where he was kneeling he could see over her shoulders, down across her pert breasts and beyond to her firm stomach. She was a fine figure of a woman. He could feel his John Thomas responding and his pants tightening. He swallowed hard and tried closing his eyes.

The sponge was taken gently from his hands. “Thank you , Jayne,” Inara whispered, slipping the silk robe across her shoulders. She turned to look at him, and he could still see the skin between her breasts. She had left her robe open.

Inara laid a hand on his chest and looked up at him. “Jayne, I know you want me. You’re a man used to regular sexing, and your wife will be unable to take care of your needs until after she has the baby. Maybe not for sometime afterwards. We won’t be going planetside for a few more days. Why don’t you let me ease some of that tension?”

Reaching out a hand she led him to the bed and let the robe slide off her luscious body. Quickly she removed his shirt, boots and pants and he was soon dressed in only his boxers.

Pushing him down to the bed Inara sat astride on his lap. Eagerly Jayne began to kiss and caress her heavenly body, starting at her neck and soon sucking on her supple breasts. She tugged on his hair and gasped, then his kisses started to move south…..

“’Nara!” It was Kaylee’s voice. “Jayne!” His blood ran cold.

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Jayne felt himself falling….. …

…

…

…

…

…

… …

…..and he woke up, drenched in sweat. It was only a nightmare. Thank Buddha!

Turning he watched Kaylee fast asleep by his side. He smiled as she snuggled up against him. He could feel the baby kicking inside her. Ai ya, he was a lucky man. His beautiful wife was going to give birth to their first baby in the next few weeks. There was no way that she would feel like foolin’ around, so he’d have to find another way of relieving his sexual tension. He was loosing sleep to these sexy dreams. Sexy dreams not about his wife. Wo de ma, if Kaylee found out…

Jayne went straight down to the cargo bay to do some weights. Everyone knew that physical exercise was a way of burning off sexual frustration. He put some extra weight onto each end of the barbell. He lay down, flexed him arms, took the strain and began to lift one… two… three… four… five…

By the time Kaylee woke up, he had done fifty lifts, fifty press ups and fifty sit ups. He was about to start fifty pull ups….

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Kaylee woke up and turned to ask Jayne to help. But he wasn’t there. Where was he? She knew that something was troubling him, that he had been having some sleepless nights, tossing and turning, muttering in his sleep and being woken up by terrible nightmares. She wished he’d share whatever was bothering him. A trouble shared is a trouble halved. That was what they used to say on Earth-that-was.

Oh well, she’d just have to try and get up by herself. She eased her way to the edge of the bunk Kaylee managed to pull herself up by grabbing onto the pipes along the walls of the bunk. She slipped on one of Jayne’s shirts and her biggest overalls, These were the only things that fit her now. She couldn’t down to put on her boots alone, so she tried to climb the steps barefoot.

Holding tight to the handles, Kaylee rested on each step as she slowly climbed out of the bunk. When she got to the top she felt a great sense of accomplishment, then she felt dizzy and collapsed onto the walkway.

Zoe and Wash heard an almighty thump and came bounding out of their bunk. Zoe took one look at Kaylee collapsed on the floor and hit the comm. button. “Simon, Kaylee has collapsed on the walkway outside her bunk. Come quick.”

As soon as Jayne heard the comm. message he grabbed his towel and ran up to where Kaylee had fallen. Holding her hand he stroked her brow and whispered comforting words to her ‘till the doc came.

Simon took one look at her and asked Jayne to carry her to the infirmary.

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Jayne waited anxiously outside the infirmary as Simon did his tests. At first he had been allowed inside to hold his wife’s hand, but had become so agitated and disruptive that Simon told him to wait outside.

“How is she, Doc?” he asked Simon when he came out.

“Both Kaylee and your baby are okay, but I’m worried about Kaylee’s health. She has high blood pressure, and that is caused by stress. She’s really anxious. You need to help her to calm down, Jayne. She’s putting her own health at risk, as well as the baby’s.”

“I’ve bin havin’ restless nights, Doc. Tossin’ an’ turnin’, but also these nightmares. I wake up drenched in sweat, just relieved that the dream wasn’t real. Think I’ve bin disturbin’ Kaylee.”

“What are these dreams about? Are you worried about parenthood?”

“Nah. I’m not so worried about being a Daddy. I practically brought up ma younger brothers an’ sisters alongside ma Ma. It’s just that Kaylee and I have stopped havin’ sex. I’m used ta getting’ it regular. I’m getting’ frustrated, if’n ya know what I mean.”

“Ah, that explains all the hours on the weights in the cargo bay. Why aren’t you and Kaylee having sex.”

“Baby’s nearly due. Wouldn’t have thought I’d have to ‘splain that ta you, bein’ a Doc an’ all.”

“So Kaylee doesn’t feel like it?”

“She feels plum ugly. I keep tellin’ her how mei li she is, all glowing and pi hua. But she says she don’t feel sexy.”

“Why don’t you try romancing her and telling her how gorgeous you think she is. You can still have sex this late on in a pregnancy. You just have to be creative about positions.”

Jayne grinned as he thought about how he would sex his heavily pregnant wife.

“If she doesn’t want to have sex all the way, but you can certainly ease her tension and give her some pleasure, and maybe she’ll do the same to you.”

“Well, I can’t say I’d ever thought ta get sexin’ advice from ya, Doc. Even wondered if ya knew how ta do it!” He grinned and slapped Simon on the back, “Thanks, Simon,” he said seriously, and went to sit with his wife in the infirmary.

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Kaylee lay on her bed, listening to her husband’s breathing as he slept. As she listened, she heard the beeping and whirring of machines. Where were they? She opened her eyes. In the infirmary!

She glanced down at her sleeping husband and stroked his cheek.

He started awake and looked up at her. A sleepy grin spread across his face. “Bao-bei, ya awake.”

“So are you,” she replied, “What happened? What I am I doin’ in here?”

“Don’t cha remember? Ya collapsed on the walkway outside our bunk.”

“Ya weren’t there. I tried getting up on my own. I made it to the top of the steps, but when I stopped I felt dizzy… “

“And ya fell. Sorry, xin-gan,” he said, kissing her on the forehead, “I shoulda bin there.”

“Just don’t leave me down there on my own again.”

“I won’t,” he replied, sitting next to her on the medi-bed and drawing her close, pressing her against his chest.

Kaylee sighed as her husband whispered soft endearments to her, telling her how much he loved her and their baby, and reminding her how beautiful he found her.

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Simon had given her the all clear, so Jayne was carrying his wife back down to their bunk.

“Hold on tight, bao-bei!” he carefully manoeuvred them down the steps.

He gently laid her on the bed, “Ya get some rest now, ya heard what the Doc said,” he said brushing the hair off her face and kissing her on the forehead.

“Don’t go.”

“Ya want me ta stay?”

She nodded her head. “Come here,” she invited him with open arms.

Sighing Jayne laid his head on Kaylee’s chest and gently stroked her swollen stomach as she held him.

“It’s time ta come out lil girl. Ya Mama’s getting’ awful tired of carryin’ ya ‘round, so ya’d better come out real soon.” He kissed her stomach.

“That for me or for our baby girl?”

“Both,” Jayne replied, looking up at Kaylee.

She took his face in her hands and pressed a kiss on his lips. “What did I do ta deserve you?”

“Nothin’. Ya were just yerself. And I love ya for it.”

Snuggling close, he buried his face in her neck and breathed in her scent. “Ya smell so fei-fei.”

She yawned. “Time ta go ta sleep, bao-bei,” Jayne told his wife.

“Yu xin teng, ai ren.”

“Yu xin teng, bao-bai yun fu.”

They drifted off to sleep safe in each others arms.

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Jayne felt warm lips pressed to his and kissed back. He wrapped his arms tightly around the warm body leaning against him. All Kaylee’s curves were pressing against the firm muscles of his legs and torso and his John Thomas was soon responding.

He grinned at his wife, “Don’t start what ya can’t finish, bao-bei!” he growled.

“Oh, Jayne! How can you want me? I feel so ugly.”

“That’s cause ya so uncomfortable, carryin’ around all that extra weight inside. To me ya so mei li, cause ya glowing. Motherhood agrees with ya.”

“It doesn’t agree with ma aching back, and I hate not being able to move around and do things. I remember when I could reach down and tie my own boots.”

“I can tie ya boots, and ya tell me what ta do and I’ll do it for ya.”

Kaylee smiled and looking up at him through her eyelashes, ran her finger across his chest and asked coyly, “Anythin’ ?”

“Anythin’ ya heart desires,” he grinned.

“HHmmm. Will ya rub ma feet? All this extra weight makes ma feet ache.”

Pressing a kiss against her lips, Jayne puffed up some pillows and put them behind her back. Grabbing some lotion she brought her legs and feet into his lap. Slowly he stroked her feet, her ankles and calves.

Kaylee sighed. It felt so good to have her husband touch her like this again. Touch her like he desired her.

Squeezing some lotion into his hands, Jayne rubbed them together to warm them, then slowly started to massage her feet.

“Oh! That feels so good,” Kaylee sighed in pleasure.

“Anything for ma yun fu ai ren.” Jayne ran his hands back up her legs and leaned forward to press another kiss against her lips.

This time Kaylee reached out her arms, pulled him closer and kissed him back. She sighed as she heard him growl and felt his hands run up her body to cup her breasts.

She suddenly pushed herself away from him. “Slow down there, cowboy!”

“Kaylee… ” he groaned in frustration, “why ya doin’ this ta me? Can’t do this to a growed man. Get me all hot an bothered and then tell me no.”

Kaylee kept her head down, her eyes filling with tears. “B- B- But I’m pregnant… “

“Baby, I talked ta the Doc. He said that we could still have sex… “

“How can you want to? I look like a wh –wh- wha- whale!” she stuttered, bursting into tears.

“No ya don’t.” he threw his arms around her and pulled her onto his lap, “Ya ma beautiful, very pregnant wife, and I think yer so hua li. Ya my wu jia zhi bao.”

“Really?” she looked up at him through large, tear stained eyes.

“Really,” he smiled, “and we don’t hafta do nothin’ ya don’t want ta. But Babe, I want ya so much. We ain’t got sexed in so long… Ma John Thomas is near jumpin’ out ma pants right now.”

She smiled, “I can feel that… ”

He reached out a hand and stroked her cheek, bending down to capture her lips with his mouth.

Kaylee kissed him hungrily back. “Ya sure the Doc said this was okay?”

“Uh Huh! Just said we’d need ta be creative.” Jayne nuzzled her neck.

Kaylee cupped his face in her hands. “We need ta go real slow.”

“That I can do,” he grinned, running his hand slowly down her back.

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To be continued