For those of you who would like to see the prompt table I'm working from Go Here.

These stories are all standalone's unless otherwise noted.

Thanks to Tamsibling for the beta!

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Kaynara continues to nag for more M/I. I love them together but I have a hard time writing them. And I just CAN'T manage to get by the block in my head in regards to writing any kind of smut for them!

Well, hope you like what I managed to get out!

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34.Foreplay

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Jayne leaned back against the chair and regarded the bickering Captain and Companion with an amused smile. After a moment, he looked around the table, saying, “Ain’t they ever gonna just do it and get it over with?”

Simon groaned and rolled his eyes, not at all comfortable with discussing anyone’s sex life at the table, though secretly glad Jayne had moved on, at least for the night, from discussing his.

River grinned wickedly at her brother. “Not safe yet.”

Simon’s eyes widened but before anyone could ask what River meant, the argument at the end of the table escalated.

“Mal, this is ridiculous. Why do you have such a problem with this?”

“It’s my boat. I say what cargo we transport. What jobs we take.”

“They’ll be as quiet as –“

“As what, ‘nara? Dogs? ‘Cause that’s what they are an’ from what I remember, they ain’t knowin’ the meanin’ of the word.”

“Simon can drug them,” River offered with a helpful smile.

“I’m not a vet,” Simon countered with a scowl toward his sister.

“An’ Jayne’s allergic,” Mal offered by way of another excuse.

“Since when do you care whether or not Jayne is allergic to dog hair?”

“Since he’s one ‘o my gun hands and I need him in top form.”

Even Jayne’s eyebrows drew together at that compliment.

Kaylee leaned against Simon with a smile. “Jayne’s right. They’re so wound, they’re gonna pop any minute.” She leaned forward and kissed away whatever retort had formed on his lips.

“Simon can give him a shot, Mal,” Inara fumed, hands on her hips.

“I ain’t havin’ my crew cleanin’ up after animals.”

“Thankfully, Jayne cleans up after himself,” Simon muttered quietly, but Kaylee heard and slapped him gently on the arm.

“We done it before,” Jayne muttered loud enough for everyone to hear.

River nodded, agreeing. “They’ve forgotten about the bovines.”

Mal suddenly turned toward the table. “No, I remember the stench quite well.”

“Yes, and you were paid well for those. Dogs are much smaller.”

“Ain’t transportin’ yippy food.”

Inara huffed indignantly. “You ben tian sheng de yi dui rou! You are the most stubborn, irritating –“

Jayne looked around the table. “Her words is gettin’ more colorful.”

Kaylee scooted closer to Simon and slid her hand into his. “Cap’n’s gonna kiss ‘er this time,” the mechanic predicted when Simon raised a skeptical eyebrow.

“Yeah, to shut ‘er up, maybe.” Jayne winced as Inara continued to hurl insults at the Captain.

“We get shot at when we do somethin’ for your ‘girls’!” Mal defended, his gaze burning her.

“Oh, yes, because we never get shot at during any other jobs!”

River turned to Kaylee. “You’re right.”

Kaylee’s eyes brightened with excitement. “Really?”

River glanced at her brother. “At least their foreplay is more entertaining.”

“An’ loud,” Jayne agreed with a leer as he stared at the bickering couple.

River shook her head. “No, you’re just not eavesdropping on Simon and Kaylee at the right time. They’re louder.”

Simon’s mouth fell open and River rolled her eyes at him before giggling at Kaylee. “He is still such an easy mark.”

By the time Simon was done lecturing his sister on propriety, Inara’s last shriek directed toward the Captain stopped all conversation around the table.

“I’m leaving Mal. Drop me off on the next civilized planet.” Inara turned on her heel and stormed out of the galley.

Simon held Kaylee’s hand as her eyes immediately welled with tears but River leaned over and whispered, “Just part of their foreplay. Won’t leave us. Not again.”

“Well, I guess you’ll be with us for a long time, then!” Mal called after her, even going so far as to take a few steps toward the direction she’d gone. “’Cause we don’t see too many a them that often!”

They could hear Inara’s retreating voice calling back, “You are a jing chang mei yong de excuse for a Captain.”

Mal took a moment to huff dramatically at her insult and without another word, hurried after her, leaving a thoroughly amused table-full of people behind.

“He’ll kiss her now,” River said, the certainty in her voice causing no one to doubt her words.

“River – it’s really none of our business –“

Kaylee stood and pulled Simon to his feet, cutting off the beginning of another lecture. “Come on, sweetie, let’s go to bed.”

Simon offered her a knowing smile, slid his hand into hers and let her lead him from the room.

Jayne snorted. “How’s that boy get laid more’n me is a mystery I ain’t ever understandin’.”

“Now Jayne,” Zoe stood, from where she had been observing everything quietly. “You’re sexed just as often. Only difference is you have to pay for it.”

~*~

Inara stormed into her shuttle not bothering to slam the door shut behind her. She knew, somewhere in the back of her mind, that Mal would come after her, and if the door was shut, he wouldn’t be so inclined to barge in. And she really wanted him to – for some reason, even though she was fuming mad at him, she wanted the chance to argue with him on her own comfortable turf.

True to form, Mal barged in a few seconds later, eyes blazing. “I’m the best Captain you’ve ever met an’ you know it!”

Inara folded her arms across her chest and glared menacingly at him. “Get out of my shuttle.”

“When you start payin’ rent, you can ask me to leave.”

“You need to make up your mind, Mal.” Inara seethed. “You despise my line of work. And since Miranda, I’ve been courteous enough not to ask you to land on civilized worlds where I can conduct my business.”

Mal said nothing and she continued.

“Even when I was paying rent, on time, I might add, you barged into my shuttle uninvited.” She took a step closer and unfolded her arms – an invitation if there ever was one. “So what, exactly, Malcolm Reynolds, do you want from me?”

Mal stood there, silent, their eyes locked. His heart thundered in his ears and he couldn’t speak. As Inara stepped closer, he could smell the sweet scent of her skin, intoxicating and overwhelming.

Disappointment flashed in her eyes. “I didn’t think so,” Inara dropped her gaze and turned away. “You’re too much of a –“ before she knew what was happening, she could feel his strong hands whirl her around to face him.

“You spin me about, woman,” Mal pulled her close, hands holding her arms firmly but gently. “I’m tired a spinnin’.” Before she could answer, his mouth covered hers in a kiss so deep and passionate that her knees buckled instantly.

She gripped his forearms as she swayed, rendered breathless and speechless by a kiss she’d waited a long time to receive.

When their lips parted, Inara’s eyes were swimming with desire. Never in her life had she wanted a man so badly. And she’d had her pick of any man she could possibly want – and then some.

“They all alike our fighting to foreplay,” Inara whispered, her breath hot against his cheek.

“Darlin’,” Mal’s voice was rough with growing arousal. It was too late to go back now. They’d taken a step into a different world. And he wanted to explore this new world for as long as she would let him. “If you thought that was foreplay, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet.”

~*~

Kaylee settled against Simon’s chest and kissed him gently. “So, ya think they did it finally?” She giggled when he groaned. “Oh, C’mon, Simon. Ya gotta admit, they’re more fun than watchin’ me pinin’ after you.”

“So long as everyone is focused on them for a change instead of us, all is good.” Simon tightened his arms around her and nipped gently at her neck.

Kaylee tilted her head to give him better access and slid her hands into his hair. “River’s always gonna pick on us. She’s your sis.”

“That’s a fact I won’t ever forget,” Simon bent and captured her lips, kissing her deeply for a long moment before they parted breathless. “Now, can we stop talking about the Captain and Inara and concentrate on –“

Before Simon could roll Kaylee over and continue his ministrations a loud knock outside their door drew them apart.

“What River!” Simon called, annoyed. He didn’t need to be psychic to know who it was. “The eagle has landed,” was all the little brat said before skipping away.

Shaking his head, Simon didn’t bother to try and decipher her words. Instead he rolled Kaylee over and kissed her, his hands and mouth uniting to pleasure her long into the night.

END

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Chinese Translation:

Ben tian sheng de yi dui rou - stupid inbred stack of meat Jing chang mei yong de - consistently useless

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