Inara had left them wine and food, but that was ignored. River was more interested in the bed, bouncing on it and laughing.

“Comes up to your expectations, moonbrain?” Jayne asked.

She gazed at him. “I think so.” She loved it now when he called her that. It meant something more than it used to, and she revelled in it. “I wonder what Inara’s doing?”

“Prob’ly shoutin’ at Mal. Reckon she misses that.” He looked at her as she lay back on the bed, her dark hair spread out around her. “Not that I care.” He fell onto the covers next to her, watching her face. “Ain’t her I want.” He put his hand on her knee, ran it up her thigh towards …

“No,” she said, sliding away from him and standing up. “I want to see you.”

“Hell, I’m here, darlin’.”

“No. See you.”

Jayne understood. He stood up slowly and came around the end of the bed, stopping a dozen feet from her. “You wanna see me naked.”

She nodded, not daring to speak.

“Whatever my bao bei wants.” Jayne stripped, taking his time and for once folding his clothes before dropping them onto the chair. Finally he stood naked in front of her.

She examined him closely, taking in his strong legs, the dark hair on his calves and thighs, the mass across his wide, muscular chest, his arms, those arms that held her so gently when she needed it, and his face. Only afterwards did she look to the base of his belly.

“River, this ain't exactly manly, standin’ here like this,” Jayne complained, feeling a twitch in his nethers.

“You’re beautiful,” she breathed.

“No, I ain’t. I got tattoos and scars, and some places it’s difficult to tell where one ends and another starts.” He touched the still raised area where Simon had shot him. “Ain't no way anyone sane’d describe me as beautiful.”

She smiled. “It’s a good job I'm not sane, then.”

“Sometimes, I think you might be closer’n most of us.” He put his hands on his hips, but decided that looked wrong, and crossed his arms instead. “Look, this ain't fair. You’re still dressed and I'm …”

“Easily remedied.” She bent forward and took hold of the hem of her pretty dress, pulling it off over her head, and in that one movement she was as nude as him.

His breath caught in his throat. He knew she’d look like that. All lean and pert, built like a dancer, with that tuft of dark hair at the top of her legs. “You … you ain't wearing underwear,” he managed to say, his voice huskier than usual.

“I didn’t need it.” She turned slowly, letting him see her fully. “Do you like me?”

He nodded, not trusting himself to speak. His ji ba did all the speaking for him. It reared up, filling with blood, standing at attention and weeping for her.

She smiled, turning back. “I think you do,” she said, looking from his groin to his face. She took a step towards him.

“You held one before?” he asked, trying to regulate his breathing as she came closer.

She shook her head. “I've seen them, through other eyes. Freya’s, Zoe’s, Inara’s …”

“Kaylee’s?”

“Don’t be gross.”

He grinned. “Just hoping I compare well.”

She looked into his eyes. “You do. Only one comes close …”

“I ain't gonna ask who. But this the first time you’ve seen one in the flesh?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know what they did to me at the Academy, but … yes, I think so.”

“So you ain't never touched one.”

“Not yet.” She reached out, tentative, almost scared, and put her hand on him. He tried not to flinch, but the feel of her at last, her skin on his, had him wanting to thrust into her fingers.

It felt strange to her. Not hard like she expected, only it was. Spongy, almost, but throbbing. And so hot. She ran her hand to the end, feeling the bulbousness, her fingers not meeting around it. Her palm was wet.

“River …” Jayne ground out her name, her touch almost making him come there and then.

She let go. “I'm sorry.”

“Hell, darlin’, ain't never having to be sorry for touchin’ me. Not now. Now when I want you more’n I can say.” He gazed into her eyes. “I’m old enough to be your father, you know.”

“I know.”

“But I don’t care.”

“Neither do I.” She hugged him, feeling his erection pressing into her. “And you’re not old. You’re young, younger than me, even.” She let go and whirled away, her hair spreading out around her.

“Girl, I take it back. You are crazy.”

“Maybe. Probably.” She came to a stop and smiled at him. “But I love you.”

“You do?”

“I know how Freya feels. The depth. The all encompassing nature of it. And I revel in it.” She backed up and climbed onto the bed, and for a moment Jayne saw a wild creature to be tamed, not a woman to be loved. Then he realised it was one and the same, and he grinned.

“You gonna just tempt me?” he asked, his gravelly voice deepening further.

She held out her arms, displaying herself. “You want me?”

“Buddha, yes.”

She lowered herself onto the covers. “Then I’m yours.”

He moved up her, his eyes taking in each centimetre of her skin, until he was on a level with her face. “I’m clean. Just so’s you know.” He coloured a little, so rare it was like the most expensive wine tinting his skin. “And believe me, that ain’t a conversation I want to be having with your brother again.”

“Clean?” She teased him, knowing how difficult that would have been.

“Asked him to test me for any … diseases. You know, ones I mighta caught from the whores I been with.”

“No more whores.”

He smiled down at her. “No. No more. Guess I found what I been lookin’ for all these years.”

“I’m here.” She smiled back at him, and he bent forward, taking possession of her mouth, his tongue thrusting between her lips to touch her own. She sighed happily.

“What?” he asked, releasing her enough so he could look into her eyes.

“You don’t kiss anyone on the lips.”

He grinned. “You ain’t anyone. You’re River. You’re my River.” He kissed her again, pressing his heavy shaft against her thigh.

“I want you,” she said into his mouth, moving enough so that he was between her legs. She could feel his ji ba at the base of her belly.

He pulled back enough so he could lean on his arms. “You sure about this?” he asked from above her. “It ain't gonna … I mean, your first time …”

“Jayne, you told someone once that, if you were looking for a permanent relationship, you’d like it to be with someone who’d never been with a man.” She reached up and stroked his face. “I’m a virgin, Jayne.”

“Hell, I know that.” He eased down a little so he could plant a small kiss on her nose. “That’s why I'm worried.”

“You’re afraid I can’t take all of you, that it will hurt and I’ll be unhappy.”

He nodded slowly. “River, I'm a big man. And having you here, under me, just makes me bigger. I ain't sure you can take me.”

She opened her thighs wide and wrapped her legs around him. “I want to be a woman. I'm not a girl any more, but I'm not a woman, and I want to belong. And I want you to make me a woman.”

“If that’s all this is about –“

She stopped his lips with her finger. “You know it isn’t. I’ve chosen, Jayne, and I've chosen you.”

“Why?” It was a question he’d wanted to ask so many times, and never had the courage until now. At least, never really wanted to know the answer until now.

“We fit.” She ran her foot up his spine to his shoulder, leaving herself wide open, his nostrils filling with the scent of her. He looked down into the view of heaven, and it was pink and lush, wet and waiting for him. “Two halves of the whole. More than the sum of our parts.”

“Your parts are so …” He could hardly breathe.

“I need you, Jayne.”

“I don’t think I know how to be gentle.”

“Yes you do.” She stroked down his chest to his shaft, lightly touching the head and making him groan. “Because I’m the one you’ve saved it all for.”

“River …” He looked into her eyes. “I gotta see …”

She smiled, letting him go. “I’d like that.”

He moved down her body, past her small breasts with their dark-tipped peaks, her flat belly and pubic thatch, to the centre of her. He opened her thighs wide, the tendons stretched, and looked down into her. “I’m gonna touch you,” he said, his voice so throaty it sounded like someone else.

“Please.”

Slowly, so very slowly, he brought his hand up and touched her folds with one finger. She trembled. Easing them apart, he gazed at the small bundle of nerves that could take her to her peak, at the darker rose entrance that would finally be his, and he had to hold himself back from plunging into her.

“You ever touched yourself?” he asked, his breath making her sigh.

“Yes,” she admitted.

“You come?”

“Sometimes.”

“What d'you like, River?”

“Like?” She glanced down at him, his head between her thighs, and felt a rush of desire.

“Just this?” He ran a calloused fingertip across her clit, and her back arched. “Or this?” That same fingertip descended down the slick folds to her entrance, pressing in ever so slightly. She shuddered, a cry escaping her lips. He smiled, amazed he could draw such out of her with just a touch.

“Jayne …” she murmured, her eyes closed to hold every sensation. No matter that she’d felt the same sensations when eavesdropping on others, this was her. Her body, her most intimate area, her juices running down her skin. “I like it all.”

He grinned and leaned forward, putting his lips around her clit and sucking. Her hips pushed at him, bucking against his face as he pressed into her with his finger. She was so tight, so hot and wet as he moved inside her.

“Jayne,” she moaned, her head thrashing from side to side. “Jayne!” The sensations coursing through her, the feel of his mouth finally on her, his finger invading her most private of parts, his beard pressing into her soft flesh … it was almost more than she could take. She came, a crashing climax that ripped through her, shuddering out of her fingers and toes, as if lightning were sparking through her hair.

“So quick,” he said, lapping at the liquid released, and smiling to himself.

“I’m sorry,” she said as she came down from her peak. “I didn’t mean to -”

“Ain’t nothing to be sorry about.” He looked up at her, his beard wet with her. “Just the first, darlin’. Makin’ you ready for me. And it won’t be the last.” He kept stroking her, avoiding her clit which would be too sensitive for a moment, just not breaking contact with her.

She gathered herself, watching him, his body dark against the paleness of her own. “I want you,” she whispered. “Inside me. I think maybe I always have.”

He shook his head. “No, River. Not always. ‘N’ I wasn’t worthy of you. Still ain’t.”

She reached for him, pulling him up to her, kissing him. She could taste something different, and realised it was her own juices. “Yes you are.”

He grinned and lowered his mouth to her nipple, taking it between his teeth and worrying it gently. She jerked a little at his touch, the bristles on her skin.

“So many places,” he said, breathing on her to make the aureole pucker tightly. “You ain’t got no idea the number of places a woman has to make her feel good.”

“And you know …” Her breath caught. “You know every one?”

“Most,” he admitted. “’N’ if there are any others, we can learn ‘em together.” He moved his hand a little, his finger grazing her clit again. “Only there ain’t time now. I gotta … River …”

She opened her thighs again. “Inside me. Now,” she ordered.

His grin widened. “Yes ma’am.” He reached over to the bedside table and picked up the bottle of lube sitting ready.

“But I’m already so wet …” River complained.

“This’ll make it easier, honey.” He squirted some into his hand, anointing the head of his cock, feeling himself to be harder and bigger than he‘d ever known before. “You’re so tight and beautiful, I ain’t gonna hurt you ‘less I …” He didn’t want to say unless he had to. He never wanted to hurt her.

She nodded. “Jayne, I want to feel all of you in me.”

“I’ll take it slow as I can.”

“I love you.”

“’N’ I love you too, River.”

She sighed happily, then her eyes widened as she felt him put himself at her entrance. She wanted to thrust up, to impale herself on him, but she knew that was impossible. This was something he needed to control.

He pressed forwards, just a little, the crown of his cock gaining entrance, all the while watching her eyes. He had to see her, to know what she was feeling, just to stop from burying himself deeply into her. Her irises contracted as he entered her, just the head, letting her walls stretch to accommodate him.

She groaned, partly with pain, but mostly pleasure, finally feeling him within her.

“River …” He was panting with the effort of not just taking her.

“More,” she whispered, stroking his hair. “Please.”

He pushed, sliding into the hot tightness, moving so slowly his balls were aching with the tension.

She felt so full that she didn’t think she could take more, then it kept coming, kept reaching into her, until she thought she would scream with the strain. Then her body eased, becoming accustomed to him, and suddenly she realised he was totally inside her, his pubic bone grinding into her clit, the tight balls touching her buttocks.

“River …” He couldn’t believe he was sheathed in her. “God, River.” He buried his face in her breasts.

“Jayne …” She lifted his head, and saw he was crying. “Jayne?”

“I …” He couldn’t say it.

She nodded, and moved her hips slightly under him. He groaned, pulling back a little before burying his cock deeply inside her once more. Then again. And again, each time moving out a little more, his shaft rubbing the nerve endings at her entrance, until he was almost pulling out of her before he thrust back inside.

Heat flashed through her as she realised, perhaps for the first time, that this was a man making love to her, that this was Jayne, and it was more than just sex, that this was … she groaned, arching her back as he bit on her nipples, sending sensations she’d never known down into her groin.

“Ain’t gonna last,” he mumbled. “Not inside you.”

She wrapped her legs around him, pulling him deeper. “Jayne,” she murmured, feeling another orgasm building in her back, her thighs, moving her inexorably towards the wave that was about to break. She arched. “Jayne!” she screamed as she came.

The sudden tightening of the walls around him was enough, and with a shudder and a groan forced from his very soul, he touched heaven and poured himself into her, great quakes ripping through him as he felt his seed engulfing her, filling her. “River …” he whispered as his body gave one final thrust and stopped.

He lay with his head on her breasts, their sweat mingling, not wanting to leave her.

She could feel him softening inside her, his beard on her chest, his hands around her back, his thighs between … her mind scattered to the four winds, and she laughed.

“River?” he asked, lifting his head.

She looked down at him. “I love you, Jayne.”

He smiled. “Good. ‘Cause it’d make my life hell otherwise, since I love you too.” He put his head back on her breast, feeling her heart beat returning to normal as she stroked his shoulder. “Damn it, if that don’t beat all …” he murmured as his eyes closed.

She felt him fall asleep, still connected to her, his weight somehow a comfort. Her fingertips trailed over the scars on his back, and she smiled. “First of many,” she whispered, a pleasant ache inside. “Oh, my lover, only the first of many.”