Soft...cool...the metal beneath her feet feels inviting. Ready to envelop her if she needs it. But she doesn't. Not today. Today she's River. Not the Crazy one or the poor kid....not the troubled sister...No....today she is River.

She feels Serenity with each step. It's encouraging her. It leads her into the kitchen and she follows. Her bare feet and Serenity take her to the kitchen, where Jayne is. Everyone else is asleep, and she's glad. Their thoughts are not so loud if they're asleep. Mal and Zoe are the only ones with bad dreams. But she's gotten used to them, can tone them out for the most part.

He's cleaning his guns. He holds them gently, following a rhythmic pattern. It's soothing. She leans against the door, watching. He doesn't notice at first, and when he does he looks up startled. His thoughts race, and she's momentarily overcome with them. Fear, suprise, guilt, admiration, and care. The last two suprise her. He's always been fearful of her, but its not the same fear anymore. Not since Miranda. Not since she saved them.

That thought surfaces above all others. It's what he thinks about when he sees her. When he and Zoe and Simon and Kaylee and Inara couldn't save them....when they had given up...she saved them all. It shocked him. He had thought she would help, maybe take out a few of them in the fight. But not like she did though. She jumped in with all of those gen-ji. She was ready to sacrifice her life to save them. He thought she would die, worse then just death though. And he surprised himself when he realized he didn’t want that for her. She didn’t deserve that. She didn’t have to save them, but she did, she saved them...and didn't die. With that thought, other thoughts begin to emerge. He doesn't understand why, but he feels admiration…and something else.

"What 'cha lookin at, girl?" he said, and she realized she had been looking at his gun. "Not looking. Listening." she replies. "they like your hands," she says and he looks down at the weapon in his hand. "Your hands...warm and secure to them. Like Serenity." He stares at the gun then at her. "you realize you make more sence nowadays?" he asked her, understanding what she said. "I'm better now. Simon's medicine helped me see better. I was confused....I'm sorry I cut you with the knife," she said suddenly. Jayne grunted. "Yeah well, I almost got ya back to those Alliance. Guess we're even. Why did ya anyways?" he asked curiously.

"I was confused, there was something bad in you and I tried to cut it out. But it wouldn't come out that way, only made the bad part worse. Made you do something you didn't want to do. In the end you fought it, and got it out. But you felt bad.......... still do....almost killed me, and in the end I saved you....but it's ok...I forgave you a long time ago."

Jayne grunted, unsure if he deserved to be forgiven. He was unsure about a lot of things regarding her lately. “So Doc’s medicine helps now?” he asks trying to change the subject. “It did,” she responds. “But now it just hurts me. But he doesn’t understand. Thinks I’ll get worse if I stop taking them…But he’s wrong. They hurt me now.” She says sadly.

“Then why do you keep taking them?” he asks “Simon won’t listen, says I should keep taking them incase I might relapse. I won’t though. He’s brought me as far as I can go. The rest can’t be fixed. Parts of me were broke a long time ago, and they wont’ ever be fixed. Simon doesn’t want to believe that.” “But your better now. He should be happy fer ya.” He says causing River to grin. Like you are, she wants to say but she knows he’ll be mad so she doesn’t. ”He’ll let me stop eventually. I can take the pain until then, I’ve had it far worse.” She says shuddering at the memories. “Yeah, I ‘spose you have,” he says not knowing what else to say. He stares at her eyes, noticing how sad she looks. He tries to think of ways to cheer her up, and doesn’t notice the small smile that forms on her lips. “Ya wanna hear a song?” he asks her and she looks up in surprise and nodds. “OK, wait here,” he tells her and runs to fetch his guitar returning in a few seconds. He sits down at the table once again and strums his fingers over the strings then plays a song. River moves down into the mess hall and closes her eyes, listening with a smile. Soon the music gets the better of her, and she opens her eyes and begins to dance. Jayne continues playing, but doesn’t look at his hands instead he looks at her. Her entire form moves to the music. He notices how her eyes sparkle and her long hair sways as she twirls around. She looks so beautiful when she dances. When the song is over he begins with a next one and she changes her dancing gracefully, but never stops. He plays and she dances without stopping for half an hour when he stops, his fingers exhausted and she stops, dizzily and breathes heavily. She smiles at him, and his mouth smiles back of its own accord. She looks happy once again, and he decides his sore fingers were worth it.