Pairings: Mal/Inara Simon/Kaylee 1.5 months After Miranda…. This is my first fic so comment would be shiny :D …………………………………………….

Simon and Kaylee are in the engine room

“Simon...Why?!”

“Kaylee, don’t cry baobei... you know that if I could change things I would.”

“But we don’t have to listen to the Capn’ Zoe and Wash MARRIED without minding him and all I want is just to be with you!”

“Yes, Kaylee I know it’s the same for me but I don’t think I can endure his dirty looks or Jayne beating the hell out of me or River being worse because of me or the Captain shipping us out...”

“So it finishes here?”

“I...I suppose so”

Simon rushed to the infirmary, he couldn’t bare seeing Kaylee cry because of his stupid cowardness.

…………………………………………….

In the infirmary

…………………………………………….

Simon was injecting River and she was also crying but not because he was injecting her.

“It’s hurting her like hell you BOOB!! She doesn’t deserve to be hurt like this”

“It’s the reason why I did it mei mei but she’s a beautiful girl and surely she’ll find someone better than me...she doesn’t deserve me…. She doesn't...deserve a fugitive like me”

“But it's YOU she wants!! She only sees the care you take of me and your ability to love!”

“I'm not the only one who can do that mei mei besides the captain won’t leave us alone and I don't want him shipping us out because of me.” “Cap'n daddy won't do that because Kaylee is his mei mei and he don’t wanna see her heart broken...BOOB!!”

And before Simon could answer she was out of the infirmary

……………………………………………. Inara’s bunk …………………………………………….

Inara was reading when the hatch opened suddenly by a goggle eyed mechanic

“Mei mei what happened?!”

Kaylee ran into her arms and cried her heart out.

“It's Simon...Inara...he don’t wanna be with me no more!” She managed between sobs.

“Oh merciful Buddha this is terrible mei mei... Did he at least give you a reason?”

“Yes... He’s afraid that the Capn’ will ship them out and his dirty looks and if Jayne beats the hell out of him he couldn’t take of River... Inara... Why?

“I tell you WHY because that foolish piece of goushi couldn't get his face out of his butt!!”

“Still can’t believe that Simon don’t wanna be with me no more...”

“Mei mei... Simon is afraid.”

“Afraid? But he don’t usually tell me I’m scary…” “No sweetie he thinks you are the most beautiful girl he has ever seen and that he doesn’t deserve you, that’s why he’s afraid! He’s afraid of hurting you because you know the ability of men in love saying something stupid at the wrong time…”

“But I don’t that Inara!”

“I know mei mei … but that’s what HE thinks. But don’t worry you’ll have him back because firstly he couldn’t live without you and secondly I’ll be having a nice little chat with our captain… you just wait here.”

She put the book on the shelf patted Kaylee’s hair and went out while Kaylee was trying to think how the Capn’ could possibly be convinced.

…………………………………………….

On the Bridge

…………………………………………….

Mal was talking to Jayne about the shooting on the next job when a furious Inara came.

“Jayne, can I have a little private chat with the captain?” She hissed. Jayne knew that no one for his own sake should mess with an angry Inara, so he walked away muttering something about women.

“Inara...are you out of your gorram mind?! We were talking about the next job and as long as you want to eat you’d better leave it to me!”

“Don’t you forget that I’m a master mind but the reason of interrupting you from your PETTY THEIVING was that I came to tell you what a tyrant you are and you have no right messing other people’s life because you know they’re in love and you’re JEALOUS!!” She yelled, now she could be heard from all the parts of the ship.

“I’m not jealous ‘Nara and you know what I said about shipboard romances!! Besides you’re the very least person who should be talking about LOVE ‘Nara because you just don’t know what it is!!! You just deceive men with it cause they have credits to pay your GORRAM WHORING!!!”

And with that those two brown puddles he adored so much were getting all watery because of him and he was already cursing himself for it. Why would he hurt her so much? Why couldn’t he just say the right thing?

“You know the last client I took only needed some mental comfort not PHISICAL it was all about meditating and it was a girl who needed to find herself after her mama’s death but that doesn’t matter now cause you won’t be having a whore on your boat and I won’t be staying on a ship owned by a tyrant…. I will be leaving on the first planet we land on”

And before he could open his mouth she was rushing to her bunk crying because of him and most of all she was leaving him again and he knew that this time he won’t endure it … he’ll die heartbroken. ……………………………………………. Inara’s shuttle …………………………………………….

Inara opened the hatch so suddenly that gave Kaylee a fright. Kaylee knew that something was terribly wrong if Inara was crying.

“I’m so sorry mei mei …. ‘m so sorry….”

“I knew the capn’ was stubborn …. But what’s wrong with YOU?”

“I’m leaving mei mei and this time I won’t be returning again” Inara was now crying freely while Kaylee sat wide-eyed staring at her without the force to even cry.

“Don’t leave Inara please; I can’t live without you too now”

“I’m sorry mei mei couldn’t do anything”

They hugged each other crying for their men

……………………………………………. Dinner Table …………………………………………….

Inara and Kaylee hadn’t showed up at dinner Mal was there but he wasn’t really in appetite, Zoe was silent as always strangely even Jayne hadn’t said a word and Simon wasn’t very talkative. But River couldn’t take no more the sorrow she felt and burst into tears.

“Mei mei what’s wrong?”

But all River managed to say between sobs was “Love…Pain… suffering…. Innocent…heartbroken….death…. endurance….wrong words….have to fix to live”

Simon and Mal both understood but neither of them would admit it out loud. Simon gave River a smoother and she slept.

……………………………………………. The pit …………………………………………….

River had set the auto pilot that night. Mal sat in the co pilot seat he knew that he won’t be sleeping tonight… not when Inara told him she would be leaving again and he knew this time she won’t be coming back to him and this made his heart torn up.

He didn’t see or hear River creeping up behind him not to say feeling her injecting him with one of her smoothers.

………………………………………………………………………………………

Momma?

Son...I need to talk to you?

Mother...you know how much I love to see you but as I always said to Book..Sermons make me sleepy.

Mal Book’s a wise man but now that he also left I cannot let you ruin the rest of your life with your own hands

Ma this ship is runnin’ real smoothly you know?

You know it's not the ship I'mtalking about...

Then what?

I'm talking about you destroying your heart and the ones around you

Oh please!!! I’m not letting any shipboard-romance be it gets all complicated and it hurts. The last time I was allowed to love was before the war and I lost all the ones I loved including you...and I don’t want lil' Kaylee or the doc or any of the crew to suffer as much as I did...I mean look at Zoe !!! she’s suffering like hell and honestly...I thought that seeing her would make them understand! Damnit

Mal it’s true she hurting but she doesn’t regret one bit of it… she just gave Wash all the love she could give him and she has no regrets about it. And don’t you think I don’t know about your love for that pretty lady as well as her’s for you…you might think she is strong but I’m tellin’ ya she’s more fragile then you could ever imagine

But-

What would you say if I told you that she's crying her eyes out because of you?

I know she’s so tiny gorram beautiful an’ all but I always end up hurting her

Mal!! Let your heart and the others love and behave like the man I raised!

And before he knew his mother disappeared. ................................................

Next day’s mornin’ …………………………………………….

Mal was in the engine room to see if everything was ok with Kaylee but he knew nothing was all right.

“Mornin’ lil’ Kaylee bird”

No reply

“Look Kaylee I know you’re upset with me.... I came here to talk to you about the doc-”

“I don’t wanna talk to you no more ‘specially about Simon”

“You could wait and listen to what this mean ol’ man has to say”

“I don't wanna listen”

“Well...” he sighed “I’m going to tell you anyway...if you and the doc want to have-”

Kaylee bulleted out from beneath the engine

“Well yeah..I mean-”

Kaylee rushed into his arms

“I LOVE MY CAPN'!!!”

“Ok mei mei better don't let the doc hearing you say this or he can get mighty jealous” he managed between laughter.

“I'm going to tell Simon!”

And she left him alone thinking how now was he gonna prevent his own heart from breaking. How was he going to prevent Inara leaving? And how was he going to show her his feelings without ending in hurting her more then he already did.

……………………………………………. Infirmary …………………………………………….

“SIMON!!!”

He was stocking the infirmary then Simon heard Kaylee’s scream cold blood rushed onto his veins, he couldn’t bear seeing her hurt. He rushed from the infirmary and before he could breathe he was beside her.

“KAYLEE!! Baobei what happened? Are you hurt?”

“No! Simon you’re not gonna believe but cap’n tol’ me that it’s ok if we are together!”

“Kaylee are you sure-”

But she missed kissing him and couldn’t let him finish.She kissed him gently and that was the only answer he needed cause he kissed her back, but this time it was much, much more then gentle. ……………………………………………. Inara’s Shuttle …………………………………………….

Inara was packing her dresses when a bouncy mechanic with a grin that could melt any heart barged in.

“Mornin’ Inara!”

“Good morning mei mei, to whom I own the pleasure of seeing that grin which could light up a star?”

“Oh Inara, to Simon and the capn'!!”

“Can you explain?”

“Yep, this morn the capn' came to talk to me but I didn’t really wanna talk to him so I didn’t UNTIL he told me that Simon and I can get together all right!!!”

“Mei mei !! I’m so happy for you”

Kaylee gave her such a big hug she could hardly breathe.

“So now you don’t have to go Inara!” she chirped

“Kaylee...I’m really sorry but you and Simon were the half of the reason I'm leaving”

“Then what’s the other half?” Kaylee asked intently.

“The captain doesn't want me here.” Inara smiled sadly

“He told ya that himself?!”

“No, but-”

“Inara you said yourself that men in love say the wrong things and-”

“Sweetie he told me that I don’t know what love is and he’s right not to mention whore but I’m used to that now”

“Inara that's not true he loves you as much as he loves himself and you know what love is because you treat me like a mei mei!!”

“Thanks sweetie but I already told him I'm leaving and he don't want to talk to me which means he wants me to leave”

This time Kaylee was crying again and Inara didn’t know what to do, she felt really helpless this time.

……………………………………………. Simon’s bunk …………………………………………….

River was smiling to herself she knew that it was her dirty little trick which was making things running so good this morning, Kaylee is smiling again her brother isn’t that boob anymore but there was the last big problem to solve and she was getting involved again. This made her feel meddlesome but she liked it! ……………………………………………. Mal’s bunk …………………………………………….

Mal was really getting worried, Inara hadn't eaten anything in 2 days and he hadn’t seen her since their fight and Kaylee somehow still shot him dirty looks. He needed to do something FAST he couldn’t bear Inara’s health on his conscience. Rive climbed down his ladder without knocking.

“Hey albatross don’t barge in my bunk like that or your brother will be curing heart attacks aswell!” River shot him a dirty look

“You barge in her shuttle every time.”

“I’m the captain an-”

“I don’t care! You’re a coward and you should be ashamed! Do you think that didn’t hurt her?! What if she dies and you didn’t tell her what you feel” This time River was crying and Mal hadn't a goddamned idea about what to do or say

River was right.

Part 2 coming soon :) Had a prob with the indentation sorry :S