LOST CONVERSATIONS XIII 1. WHERE SIMON TRIES TO EXPLAIN TO THE CREW WHY RIVER AND HE WERE ABOUT TO BE BURNED AT THE STAKE IN “Safe” INT. SERENITY, DINING AREA The crew are all here eating except Book. MAL So, Doc, care to relate the exciting adventures of the Tam siblings? All look to Simon as he pauses, wipes his mouth with a napkin. SIMON Well, ah, not much to say, really.. JAYNE Not much to say? Looked like a lot to me. From the ship I could see plain as day you was about to be set on fire. KAYLEE (shocked) What? No, they wouldn’t have done that, would they? ZOE Looked like it from the ground, too. RIVER It was a cleansing. They all look at her. SIMON River... WASH A cleansing of what? SIMON It was a big misunderstanding. They took us because they needed a doctor. INARA How did they know you were a doctor?

SIMON I’m not sure. I guess someone overheard someone call me doctor when we unloaded the cattle. MAL And you didn’t say otherwise? SIMON I figured that being a doctor might save us from some...terrible fate. JAYNE Yeah, there’s a whole lot worse fates they being a human torch. SIMON It didn’t start like that. I saw you leaving so.. ZOE Thought we’d left you there. SIMON Yes. JAYNE Hey, now that ain’t a bad... MAL Jayne. Enough. (beat) We had to get help for Book. SIMON I understand that now, but at the time, seemed like you were leaving us behind. KAYLEE We’d never do that! SIMON At time, I thought we’d never see you again. (beat) So we helped with the sick and injured and they said they had a house for us. I thought it might be a place we could stay for a while, just to be safe. But it wasn’t. MAL Doc, you been beating about the bush now about why they wanted to kill you. SIMON (reluctant) They thought River was a witch. INARA What? A witch? KAYLEE That’s...crazy! MAL I thought that old man was spouting scripture or something. JAYNE A witch? You mean River’s gonna fly away on a broom? WASH Yes, Jayne, and cast spells and turn us all into pumpkins. JAYNE I can turn your head into a pumpkin pie, little man. MAL Stow it! (beat) Simon, care to explain? SIMON Well, there’s no other way to explain except they thought River could...read minds. Shocked looks all around. ZOE What? KAYLEE Mind reading? INARA Is it possible? SIMON No, it’s not. They were just a bunch of superstitious people with too much religion and not enough common sense. ZOE Why’d they think she could read minds? RIVER Ruby. JAYNE (interested) Rubies? RIVER No, Ruby, a little girl. Spoke to me in... SIMON (quickly interrupting) But she’s a mute, so they thought River had read her mind. She wasn’t really a mute, just a traumatized little girl. MAL And you tried to explain this? SIMON They wouldn’t listen to reason. INARA Religion and superstition is all some of them have. KAYLEE But why’d they need to burn you? It’s just so...awful. RIVER To cleanse us and them. Of evil. Long silence as this sinks in. MAL You ain’t evil, River. I don’t pick anyone evil for my crew. River smiles at Mal and it lights up the room. WASH What about Jayne here? That beard and moustache have a sort of devilish quality about them, don’t you think? And every laughs as Jayne throws a piece of bread at Wash, who grabs it and starts to chomp away at it.

2. WHERE WASH GOES LOOKING FOR RIVER AND SIMON IN THE TOWN ON JIANGYIN IN “Safe” EXT. STREET, JIANGYIN - DAY Wash drives the Mule down the street and stops, turns off the engine, looks around. He gets off and starts walking, poking his head in door ways, looking down alleys, checking high and low, but no Simon and River. A sheriff's DEPUTY standing outside the jail notices Wash and starts to follow him. DEPUTY Hey, mister. Wash turns, startled when he sees the badge on the Deputy’s chest. WASH Hiya! Officer? DEPUTY Deputy. Whatcha lookin’ for? Wash pauses, a puzzled expression on his face. WASH Looking for? Nothing deputy, nothing at all. DEPUTY Sure looked like somethin’ to me. Where you from? You sure ain’t from around here, that’s for sure. WASH From...a ship, we just delivered some cargo..here...on Jiangyin. DEPUTY I know where we is. Well, mister, I just wanna warn you about wandering around here by yerself. Best be careful. WASH What? Careful? Of what, dieing of boredom? The Deputy snarls and grabs Wash by the arm. DEPUTY OK, big mouth, you best come and I’ll show you what’s what. WASH What? No, wait, I got no time for this...hey! INT. JAIL - DAY It’s a small jail house, with a kind of reception area up front with desks and a jail cell in the back. The two Grange brothers are here, one still nursing his wound from the gun fight. Several of the deputies and the SHERIFF from the gunfight are here, laughing and joking about it. Wash enters with the Deputy and all goes quiet as they look at him. SHERIFF What you got here, Tom? DEPUTY Just a big mouth stranger needs a lesson on the dangers of Jiangyin. WASH I’m in kind of a hurry. SHERIFF You got time for this. Show him the posteds. The Deputy drags Wash over to a bulletin board. ELDER GRANGE Hey, you gonna get my brother a doctor or what? SHERIFF Shut your mouth. You know there ain’t no doctor round here. We’ll get Susy come over and check him in a while. The Deputy points to the warnings notice board. DEPUTY See here. WASH I’m seeing. DEPUTY Settlers, up in the hills, miners mostly, they come near town sometimes and grab people. Off world folk usually, traders, the like. They see a ship land they come looking. WASH You mean kidnap? DEPUTY Yeah, ‘cept there ain’t no ransom. And we never see none of them again. WASH Why do they take them? DEPUTY Cause they need workers for the mines. WASH Well, you guys are...cops...why don’t you...you know, do something about it. DEPUTY Tell truth, those up there got religion on the brain and are very fierce in defending their rights. We ain’t got time or energy to go looking. The Sheriff comes over. SHERIFF He understand? WASH Yes, sir, I understand. DEPUTY He was looking for someone. WASH Now, I didn’t say that. SHERIFF Mister, you lose someone from your ship? WASH Not exactly lost..just can’t find th...him. SHERIFF What’s his name and description? The Deputy hands the Sheriff a pad and pencil from a nearby desk. WASH Name? His name is...Cobb...Jayne Cobb...yeah that’s it. SHERIFF Cobb, Jayne? Ain’t that a woman’s name? WASH Come to think of it, it is. But he spells it ‘J-A-Y-N-E” Jayne. SHERIFF Ok, what’s he look like? WASH Oh, he’s b...a little guy, not too tall, and...bald....got bad breath too...clean shaven...skinny, a real wimp...kind of ugly.... DEPUTY Sure you want him back? WASH Oh, don’t get me wrong, he’s a friend, but he has his..well, you know, faults. SHERIFF OK. Well have an eye out for him but can’t promise you nothin’. What’s your name? WASH Me? Ah, Book...Malcolm Book. SHERIFF And your ship? WASH My ship? (pause, no lie coming) Called Serenity, a Firefly. SHERIFF Well, mister Book, you just write down the wave number of your ship and we’ll give a holler if anything comes up. Wash writes a number on the pad. WASH Thanks. You guys are...well, real nice. SHERIFF Ain’t we just. Now you and your folks don’t go beating them hills for your missing man. I don’t need no bloodbath round here and don’t what no Alliance involved. WASH Yes, sir. Perfectly. SHERIFF Good. Have a nice day. The Deputy leads Wash to the door and shows him out. EXT. STREET, JIANGYIN Wash pauses for a moment and then runs like hell for the Mule, jumps on and roars out of town.

3. WHERE KAYLEE THANKS ZOE FOR SAVING HER LIFE IN “Out of Gas” INT. SERENITY, INFIRMARY Mal lies on the examining table, still unconscious, blood and IV bags still attached. Zoe sits on a chair with Wash nearby. Simon shines a light in Zoe’s eyes. SIMON Good. Reaction is good. How’s your vision? ZOE Fine. WASH (worried) She going to be OK, Simon? ZOE (impatient) I’m fine. WASH Let Simon decide that, baby. SIMON OK. You can go to your room, but just rest. And when you get up, do it slowly. No work or anything for a few days. WASH You mean anything? I mean we can... ZOE (shocked) Husband? Didn’t you just say to let Simon decide? WASH I’m joking..just joking! Simon laughs and then turns to see Kaylee standing in the door. KAYLEE (serious) How’s Capt’n? Simon looks at Mal. SIMON Needs to rest, but he’ll be fine. KAYLEE Zoe? How you doing? ZOE Good. Thanks. Kaylee waits, shifts her feet, looking like she wants to say more. KAYLEE Zoe...I....wanted to say... ZOE It’s OK, Kaylee, I understand. KAYLEE No, you don’t. I just froze...couldn’t move. Saw that big ball of fire coming at me and thought that was it. Then you come and push me outta the way and now look what happened to you. You could’ve died. Why’d you do it? ZOE Don’t know. Just did it. Instinct took over. KAYLEE I wouldn’t have survived, not strong like you. ZOE Yes, you are. Just in different ways. An awkward silence. SIMON I for one want to thank you also Zoe. Not only for saving Kaylee, but for forcing us to come back to the ship when you woke up. Weren’t for that... WASH Let’s not think about that. KAYLEE Was all my fault. They look at her and she’s a mess of guilty feelings. ZOE Kaylee, wasn’t anyone’s fault. SIMON Things just happen sometimes. WASH We’re here. We’re alive. I’m thankful for this small miracle. KAYLEE (small smile) You guys are the best. WASH We know. And laughter breaks the tension. MAL Hey, what a lazy crew. KAYLEE Capt’n! And she comes in by his side as all turn to him, Simon checking his signs on the scanner. WASH Hey, the living dead! MAL Not dead yet. Am I, Doc? SIMON No, not yet. MAL Zoe, report. ZOE Back on course for Greenleaf, more direct route. KAYLEE Engine’s fine, thanks to you. Life support operating. WASH Now, Mal, if you’re up to it, what the hell happened here after we left? Jayne’s still looking for the guy who shot you. MAL They’re long gone. Tell you one thing, though. Next time little Kaylee you ask me to get a part for this boat, I ain’t gonna spare no expense. Even if I have to steal it. KAYLEE Really? Cause I need.... Fade out as Kaylee starts listing a whole string of parts and Mal groans and all laugh.