Twilight Wanderings -------------------------------------------

based on the world of Firefly by Joss Whedon

She walked through a field of grass, her bare legs tickled by the feathered tips. Cat was completely alone, no voice, no other mind, just her and her thoughts. The thin white dress flowed over her body like water, making her feel like a real woman instead of a weapon as each step brought her closer to her destination. A voice alerted her, but instead of going on the defensive, she let her naked feet carry her close to the sound.

Zoe lay in the grass on a picnic blanket, her body wrapped in a slinky black dress, completely out of place in the flowered field. She was happy, her full lips open with white teeth exposed in a beautiful smile, one Cat had never seen. A man with red hair lay next to her, a flower covered shirt clashing with her dress and a flute of wine in his hand.

Cat could hear Zoe, but like all dreams she had walked into, only the one dreaming could be heard. All else was like walking into a silent movie. Zoe had called him husband twice as his eye danced and his smile infectious. Strangely, all around them were small plastic dinosaurs like the one 'Ski had found on the console. Mystery solved.

She felt embarrassed to be here, walking this couple, the woman she never knew Zoe could be. Her eyes flitted up to the sky, What had happened that caused this to be shattered? A scream brought her attention back and there stood Zoe's husband run through by a reaver's spear.

Tears fell from her eyes and she wished she could reach out, take Zoe into her arms and let the woman cry as long as need be, but instead, she let go and fell into blackness....

***

She stood in front of a beautiful home, colonel with shutters and a white picket fence. Two little one played in the yard, chasing each other in a silent game of tag. One more, slightly older swung from a tire hung on an oak. A woman emerged, swollen belly filled with another little one. Kaylee grinned as she watched her children playing, a glow to her that Cat had only seen once her family and ship were back together. Her mouth moved, but no sound issued and Cat was surprised. This wasn't her dream.

Instead, out of the door came a proud Simon, his smile equal to Kaylee's but carrying a bit of worry. He placed a hand on her belly and spoke. The words were broken, usual in dreams, but she got the point. "......be in bed....."

Cat inwardly hoped that this would one day come true as she closed her eyes. letting the blackness come.

***

She awoke in a bedroom, completely split in half filled on one side by little girl things and thing that could only be associated with dancing. Ballet shoes hung in one corner and a large brown bear in another. Her fingers brushed the teddy, but they passed right through.

The other side was completely opposite with wires and screens glowing green. Cat shook off chills as she recognized what this place represented and she knew whose dream this was. Sobbing in the corner on a bed with one side pink, the other a metal slab lay River. She trembled uncontrollably as Cat went to reached for complete out of instinct. With hollow eyes, the torn girl opened them and looked straight at her. One word issued from her mouth, but Cat got the complete meaning. "OUT!"

******

She was on board Serenity, the ship's engine humming like it never had before. The engine room looked completely new with clean, oil free parts, and shiny new finish. Strangely, she usually never heard any other noise in a dream, unless the mind had some bit of psychic power.

Music issued from two speakers sitting on one side of the room and in the other was Kaylee and Simon. She wore a beautiful wedding gown and he in a black suit. They were dancing and laughing.

Cat hadn't been surprised by Kaylee's ability. It stood to reason the way she could 'speak' to her ship and know when something went wrong, but did the mechanic know she was gifted more than just with her hands. She smiled as the two continued to dance and Cat let the blackness overtake her.

**** A classroom met her next, a scantly dressed woman as the teacher and desks made of wood lined up filled with kids. Jayne sat in the middle, his eye staring at the front and the teacher's ample cleavage. Kaylee was on one side of him and Simon on the other.

The teacher spoke, issued a question by the look of it and Simon's hand shot up like a rocket. He answered, but it had to be wrong by the way the teacher shook her head. Jayne calmly brought up his hand, a wicked grin splitting his lips. “2189.” He replied as the group jumped up applauding him like he had done some heroic act. Cat laughed. Simon looked put out and Kaylee just swooned over Jayne. It was not the typical dream Cat figured from the trigger happy man, but as she let the blackness take her, dreams were where you could be anything....

****

The next one she could tell immediately whose dream it was. They were on a ranch and a younger Mal, the one she remembered back during the war, but not as hard as when she met him. He held on to his brown coat, standing in front of a screen door and trying to convince himself to go in.

His mom came to the door as Mal backed up a little. She reminded Cat strangely of Patience. Not exactly, but with her long brim hat and gray hair, at a distance one could make the mistake. She was smiling at him, but lost it as she looked down at the coat in his hand.

He was telling her about his beliefs, his reason for going to a war that he wasn't sure he would come back from, but if he did, she shouldn't worry because he would return to take care of the ranch. The woman nodded, understanding something she knew would eventually happen. Her hands held something in them and as she hugged her boy close, Cat could see the cross dangling from her fingers....

*****

He sat on a black metal chair, nothing around him, the same one she had sat in when waiting for Mal to heal. She could tell he was worried, something that she had never seen him be and it made her laugh a little.

His head flashed up as he stared at her, then let his eyes slide down her form. “Nice dress, Babe.”

“Not to original. Dream and reality are suppose to be different.”

“Not today. By the way, why you here? Aren't you suppose to be either dying on that table or fighting for life?”

“What would you prefer?”

“Part of me, the big part wants you to live, but a small part....”

“Wants this charade to end and be free to go on with your life. You've always been able to do that.”

“No, I haven't.”

“Still want to know why I saved you?”

His eyes looked up. “Please.”

“Because that night you asked me to dance and there was no fear in your eyes. There has never been any fear. Not even when the beast takes over,”

“So what's this? I mean I know your other half can walk dreams, but you...”

“Yes, when the beast isn't in mine, I can walk, but you are the only one I can talk to.”

“Why am I so lucky?” It held 'Ski's trademark sarcasm.

“Because I chose to. You're the only one besides River and that was her choice, though I think she's a little stronger mentally than me.”

“Only one and not your precious Mal.” He didn't mean for it to sound bad.

Cat ignored him as she spoke. “I did it for one reason. I wanted to tell you without all the hoopla of reality getting in the way. I wanted to say thank you, for always seeing me as human and for coming to my rescue over and over and over again, no matter where I was or what I needed. I have never had someone like that and I'm glad you are here to watch over me.”

“Don't need me, Babe, but thanks. Bit of a waste though. Only one connection and you wasted it on me.”

“Didn't waste it. Maybe you think so, but I think I chose well. Now, if you will excuse me, I either need to be dying or living.” She smiled as she began to walk away.

'Ski drummed his feet on the floor watching her leave, his hand thumping his knee, Finally he gave up, a 'damn it' slipping from his mouth and he got up, ran over to her and pulled her into his arms. His lips were to hers before she could mutter a single word.

It was a passionate kiss, one only her partner could give her, not bogged down with thoughts of love and romance, but one filled with pure passion. Cat let herself go as he pulled her closer to him, their heartbeats echoing the other, her chest pressed hard against his. 'Ski rolled his tongue across hers before taking her bottom lip in his teeth and gently biting it.

“Wow.” She muttered, her eyes a bit dazed as she stared into his. “And how long have you wanted to do that?”

“Honestly, just right now.” She looked at him a bit hurt, his arms still encompassing her as he felt her body respond to his desire. “Hell, Babe, I've wanted to fuck you since day one. You got a kick ass body and I KNOW you're an animal in bed, but kiss you like I did now, well....” He let her go and moved away. His hand reached for a cigarette as he lit it. Cat laughed, even in his dreams, the man needed his smoke. “I can't give you love, Cat. Hell, not sure I can do that any more.”

“Mal will always have my heart, 'Ski.”

“So why not this?” He used the smoke to motion to both their heads.

“Because eventually you'll leave and then I can find you where ever you are.”

“You plan on staying on the ship?”

“Yes. Might do some work outside and hunt down what's left of the Academy, but yes, I was planning on staying with him.”

“Can't say I'm surprised.” He wasn't sad. They had more to do before that day came and hell knows what would change, but something in him was almost relived for what she had done. “Now you won't always be in my dreams. Because man needs his privacy.”

“You'll know when I'm there.” She took a deep breath. Walking over to him, he let her lips kiss him lightly before placing a hand on his arm. 'Ski pulled her again into his arms half out of not wanting it to end and half out of knowing that where she was going, he could not protect her. “I've got to go.”

“Will I be able to find you when I want?” He caught her eyes as she moved away. They had always been beautiful, but something here made them even more so.

“Always, Declan. You will always be able to find me.” Her face was the last to disappear.

***

Cat convulsed as the meters around her wounded body went wild. Then as suddenly as they began to scream, each one went silent as the long green line showed no beat............

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