Bullets n’ Prayers

Part -3 :Wedding Crashers

Cast of Wedding Guests

Colonel Grrey Watson- Bruce Boxleitner Dora Watson- Morgan Fairchild Sky Watson- Yvonne Strahvoski Maxwell Vogg- Zachary Levi Henry Watson- Ryan McPartlin Felicia Watson- Felicia Day Alter Server- Josh Gomez

Pretty much the entire cast of Chuck

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The Setup:

In seven days the Affiliation of Unified Planets will celebrate “Unification Day”, and Shepherd Book is noticeable absent from the Crew of Serenity. The good Shepherd has been tasked with honoring the war dead that fought for the Independence side during “ The Great Unification War”. Does this make him a trader? Of course not. The preacher now has a firm belief that all who died in that war should be honored.

Still, he does hold some guilt in the part he played in the war…….but that’s another story. Should be coming out in “ A Shepherd’s Tale” this month!

Anyway…..the duty for posing as a preacher has turned to Jayne Cobb, and now it is his job to unite two people in a state of holy matrimony. Will he be up to the task? Well, to help, Jayne may have partaken a bit more of the ceremonial wine than he should have….just to ease his nerves a bit, you know. As long as he keeps that big knife hidden, yepper…..the same one he used to skewer Stitch Hession back in Canton, then things should be as smooth as a Bellerophon seascape!

Are Bellerophone seascapes smooth……? Just askin….

Part -3 :Wedding Crashers

Day of the Vogg/Watson wedding- - - - - - -

It was a beautiful early mid-morning. Preacher Cobb was dressed in his ceremonial duds waiting to greet the guests, and wedding party of the ceremony he was about to perform on this honorable occasion. The bride’s family were there. Consisting of, Lieutenant-colonel Grrey Avery Watson, of the Unified Alliance forces, (retired) and father of the bride. His lovely wife Dora, Sky’s mother . Sky’s brother, Henry, and her first cousin Felicia. There were other folk of distant lineage, and a few friends of the bride too. All waiting to shake hands with the honorable Samuel J. Cobb before taking their seats in the open air ceremony.

Following Mal’s direction, Jayne had organized the ceremony to be held outside, at the rear of the Chapel. There were flowers and chairs arranged back there, and a canvas shade covering the alter platform for the wedding party. The guests were to be led through the church, then out the back choir room. A route chosen by the Serenity captain. In this way Mal felt that attendees would be less willing to carry weapons into a church for a wedding, before they actually knew it was going to be held outside in the open.

On the groom’s side there were only a couple of friends Max had made during his stay on Greenleaf.

This wedding union was a bit different than others, being that neither of the couple to be married were from Greenleaf, but as always, home was where you make it. And Marshal wasn’t a bad place to start a life together.

Sky’s family had flown in from Boros, where they lived, and where Grrey Watson had been an Alliance officer overseeing the weapons manufacturing facility during the Unification War. Well raised, and well cared for, Sky and her brother had grown up with advantages of the wealthy. Not that she were a spoiled, rotten brat. Her parents had worked hard to see that she had a good education, and that she and her brother would work hard to provide a good, solid foundation for their future grandchildren. Sky had taken a job as a small, country town nurse on Greenleaf, hoping to work her way into better positions as she gained experience. But today, was all about getting married..……

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The bride looked as lovely as a Spring sunrise and there was pure excitement in the air as the guests arrived and took their seats behind the chapel. Jayne Cobb ( I mean Samuel J. Cobb) shook the hand of each guest as they prepared to take their seating for the ceremony which was to follow the “Welcoming” portion of the program.

“Reverend Samuel Cobb,” Jayne introduced himself as he met a handsome and distinguished gentleman attending the wedding ceremony.

“ Lieutenant Colonel Grrey Watson.” The man informed him as he stood before Jayne, letting him know that he were father of the bride.

“ And this is my pretty wife Dora….” He introduced Sky‘s mother. He then paused momentarily….

“ Pastor Cobb? Don’t I know you from someplace during the war?” Sky’s father questioned Reverend Jayne. The new preacher had to think quickly…..

“ Well maybe sir, I was Chaplin for the 441st back before the battle of Chapel Pass!” Jayne lied his ass off.

Grrey’s look told Jayne that he was unsure……” I’m not familiar with Chapel Pass, “ He said, “ Though, I’m not familiar with many of the battles during the war, being that I was more involved in arms development back on Boros at that time. Good meeting you.” He said, then moved on.

Jayne, who’d been holding his breath, let out a deep gush of air as he greeted Dora, whom was next in line. He’d been able to remember hearing about the battle of Chapel Pass from hearing Zoë speak about it, and because at the moment he was standing right behind one. Thank goodness Sky’s father had pretty much been restricted to civilian life during the war.

Once all the guests had been welcomed, and seated and the groomsman and bridesmaid were in place (one of each) Jayne began the activities.

“ My brothers and sisters, we are gathered here today to join two dear, sweet people in the honored union of blessed wed. Now in all honesty, I have not known the couple all that long…..but during the short time that I‘ve known them………..”

………..Jayne went on with his memorized lines. He had rehearsed for three hours the previous night and the words, with help from an entire bottle of ceremonial wine, were slipping rather smoothly off the end of his tongue.

What Jayne hadn’t noticed, nor had anyone else, was that an extra couple of guest had infiltrated the party and were now seated in chairs at the back of the celebration.

Mal and Zoe, although not friends of the bride or groom, were associates of the preacher and would soon be turning this exuberant occasion upside-down.

Mal and Zoe had began the morning with a little trip over to the sheriff’s office. The captain of Serenity had instructed Kaylee to fly over ‘ol man Whittier’s cattle ranch, 7 miles north of town to start a diversion. After which he and Zoe had gone to the Law-office and locked up the remaining two deputies that had been left to guard the town. Marshal had a total of 4 deputies, and 1 sheriff, there wasn’t much crime in the small, country town.

Anyway, back at the wedding - - - - -

Jayne wound down his beginning speech,…….the wedding march started, with the help of a flute, and all turned to see the beautiful bride being escorted down the aisle on the arm of her loving father. There were smiles and tears and hearts a racing.

The bride was brought to the stage and Jayne, looking at the father, questioned of the man……

“ And who give-eth the hand of this young woman so that she may be united in the celebration of wedded matrimony…..” He stopped, then added, “ of her own free will….”

The entire wedding party paused to look at the preacher. That last part had been an odd thing to add.

Jayne was only going by the words he’d heard used by a deacon on a similar situation. Jayne had been witness to several ceremonies where the maiden was being auctioned off and married to some border world Barron or rim world property owner. Many a time in ankle bracelets. Sky’s father got over the uneasy question quickly, and continued with his answer.

“ I do.” He announced, befuddled a bit.

“ Thank you good sir, you may take your seat.” Jayne pointed to the front row…then continued.

The wedding then advanced with rings exchanged, vows spoken and towards the end there was a single cup of wine brought, and each took a sip of it’s contents. This symbolized the sharing of a life together and a sharing of everything they would achieve as a couple together. The entire wedding group had been given a shot glass of the drink and then quested to indulge just as the happy couple were partaking of their own swallows of the wedding wine at the alter. This was then followed by a deep passion filled kiss. Jayne after which time turned the newlyweds out to face the attendees.

“ I now pronounce you………..!”

“ Hostage and wife!!” Came a voice from the rear section of the ceremony.

The entire wedding group turned to see a man standing there, weapon drawn, pointed straight up into the air. Mal strolled down the carpeted lane. He acknowledged the presents of a woman with a bigger weapon still standing in the rear. He walked all the way up to the wedding platform. Face to face, he looked into the eyes of Maxwell Vogg.

“ I’m sure that you’re aware sir that there’s a bit of a bounty out on your head.” The captain stated while looking at Maxwell.

Jayne’s eyes were bugging out of his head…..as were the eyes of all of the attendees at the wedding.

“ Dead or alive!” Mal continued, “Yet the collector must be provided with the proof. I’m here to collect that bounty, party willing, or not!” Mal spoke loud enough for all who were sitting within a suitable range to hear.

“ Now wait one moment…I will…..”

“Do as I say!! Sir!” Mal finished the sentence of the new husband. “ As will the rest of your wedding party!” Mal scanned the entire group.

“ Now listen up!” The captain called for the full attention of the gathered guests. “ This fellow is going to come with me! If the alarm is sounded as we make our departure, or there is any other hindrance to our plan,” Mal paused and looked around, “………then that wouldn’t be a good thing.” He stopped, then spoke again….

“ We are only looking for the same slice of life that each and every one of you here seem to have been enjoying. We…….”

“ Now wait a minute……” Jayne began……….but stopped mid sentence as the captain place his revolver close to the mercenary’s forehead.

The sound of an approaching shuttle soon fell upon the ears of the wedding group and all looked skyward as a small craft came into view then landed not 100 paces behind the ceremony. The door opened, but no one exited.

“ Now, there is an alternative.” Mal stopped and pointed to carpeted aisle below him, “….We will be placing a basket here…for donations. Feel free to drop any coin, jewelry or other valuables inside. If the cache outweighs the bounty then I’m liable to exit this little party, and let things go about their merry. If not……..!” He just stopped.

The captain then motion to one on the alter servers to dump a basket of roses out onto the ground and place it in the center aisle on the carpet. He then invited the guest to submit offerings to save him from abducting the just bonded newlywed.

Jayne could see now how Mal’s plan was working. Looked to be a pretty good payoff being dumped into the basket. He smiled, but only on the inside.

Once the basket looked to be pretty weighty Mal motioned Maxwell to go pick it up.

The ex-Badger associate then looked inside and saw a multitude of wealth which had been distributed within it’s woven walls. He turned to look at the robber.

“ I will not sir…..stand here and witness the fear and robbery of a family that I’ve just become a part of….. And see you spoil a day for me and my beloved that was to be special day in our lives.…!” Vogg shouted.

Mal pointed his pistol straight at the newlywed.

“ Dead or alive, read the cortex message……by thy own will!” The captain said.

With this Vogg threw the basket at the captain and made a mad dash towards him.

Mal’s finger squeezed the trigger, by instinct really, and the silence that had been so a part of that early morning celebration…. Was now broken by the resounding “Boom” of a very loud blast that seemed to echo off of the surrounding hilltops.

Vogg collapsed on the spot. The entire wedding party was throw into chaos and shock, but were kept at bay by Zoë as she provided the boundaries which no one dared to cross.

Jayne couldn’t believe what he was witnessing. Grrey Watson rushed over to his new son-in-law, as did the bride.

“ He’s dead!!” He spoke looking over at Mal.

“ As will be more if my words are not expressed to the letter.” The Serenity captain voiced.

“ Now everyone, into the chapel!”

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Has Malcolm Reynolds double-crossed Maxwell Vogg to deliver the end to the infiltrator Badger had quested him to finish off, and at the same time parlayed the situation into a better payoff that the expense of the Vogg/ Watson wedding party? Maybe the next chap will answer such questions. Hope folk stay tuned……BPZ

End Part 3