"Oatmeal?" Jayne groaned at breakfast, resting his feet on the table.. "That ain't nice. Don't you like us none, Kate?"

"Can't stand a one of you," she said evenly. "Eat it or go without."

"There's jam in the cupboard," River said, rolling her eyes. "Don't be such a baby. Studies have shown that daily consumption of a bowl of oatmeal can lower blood cholesterol, and it has a high content of complex carbohydrates and fiber which encourage slow digestion and stable blood-glucose levels. Also, the fiber will help keep you regular."

"River," Simon sighed. "We know you're brilliant. Can't you ever just eat something and not teach a lecture on it?"

River narrowed her eyes and stuck her tongue out at her brother.

"Now, now, children, none o' that at my table," Mal said, casually knocking Jayne's feet off the table. "Hey, you want I should put my boots where you eat?"

"Ooh, gruel," Wash said, rubbing his hands together. "Look, she even put in cockroaches for authenticity."

"Raisins, dada," Hannah told him, laughing.

"Is that what they are?" He picked one out with his fingers and inspected it closely. "Hmm. I don't see any eyes... no legs... you must be right."

"I'd tell you to stop playing with your food if I thought you'd listen," Inara said, smiling at the picture the two of them made. "Why oatmeal, Kate?"

"As it happens, oatmeal is one o' the most healthsome foods you can have for breakfast," Mal said, "which is why I'll be havin' a bowl o' Jayne's amazin' technicolor dream cereal."

"We ran out of powdered egg substitute two days ago, and what's left of the bread was too mouldy to feed to humans," Kate explained. "Jayne, you're welcome to help yourself to some toast if you like."

"Saucy," Wash grinned, turning to Mal. "Isn't she saucy?"

"Saucy, sure," Mal said absently, pouring himself a bowl of brightly colored sugar cereal and ignoring the look of disgust on Kate's face.

"Anyhow, it's oatmeal for breakfast until we dock at New Vegas day after tomorrow," Kate continued. "On the bright side, I can do amazing things with protein; you won't even know that's what you're eating."

"Except, you told us," Simon pointed out.

"Except I told you," Kate agreed. "Come on, eat up. This stuff only gets thicker as it cools."

"You mean," River said with a wrinkled nose, "breakfast is going to congeal?"

~*~

"Well," Kate sighed, pulling a clump of congealed oatmeal out of her hair, "that was a disaster."

"Jayne started it," Wash said innocently. "Everything I did was in self-defense. Or in defense of you and our child."

"You tipped the whole pot over his head." Kate was unable to smother the smile that burst forth from her lips. "He did look funny, dripping with it, though, didn't he?"

"You were more or less untouched until he shook off," Wash agreed. "Then everyone got covered."

"At least Hannah's washed up. Now I can worry about myself. Ugh, it's drying," Kate groaned. "I'm seriously thinking, not for the first time, about cutting my hair short. This braid took a long time to grow out, but with a toddler it's just not practical."

"And if you were going to have more kids, it would just become more of a hassle," Wash added casually.

"More kids?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

Wash shrugged, grinning. "Hannah's been asking for a baby brother or sister."

Kate studied him for a minute. Then, as though she'd found the answer she'd been seeking, she reached into one of her trunks, coming up with a mean-looking pair of shears. She took hold of her oatmeal-crusted braid and cut it right off, around shoulder length. "There," she said, breathing a sigh of relief and shaking her remaining hair free. "I'll have Kaylee or Inara even it out later, but at least now it won't take half an hour just to shampoo it."

Wash gaped. "You just - you - your hair -"

Kate smiled at him. "You said it yourself, if I'm going to have more kids..."

Wash closed his mouth, a smile spreading across his face. "So that shampooing you were talking about. I don't suppose you'd need a hand with that?"

Kate cocked her head to the side, considering. "Kaylee?" She called out the door.

"Yeah?" came the reply.

"Keep an eye on Hannah for me?"

"Sure!"

"Excellent."

~*~

Hannah and River were curled up on the couch next to Kaylee, talking to the babies. It wasn't disturbing, really, until you noticed that River was actually responding to Hannah in the same gibberish the little girl was uttering to Kaylee's tummy. Kaylee looked rather perplexed, but had a good-natured smile on her face when Simon entered the common area. "Heya, Dr. Feelgood," Kaylee grinned.

"Hey, sweetheart. Where's Kate?" Simon asked, looking around as though he expected her to appear instantly.

"In the shower, I think," Kaylee replied. "Why?"

"Well, Xue just dragged this," he said, holding up an oatmeal-crusted braid in illustration, "into our bunk, and I have a feeling Kate is probably missing it. I mean, I'm sure she knows it's no longer attached to her, but -"

"She'll probably wanna hold onto it, yeah," Kaylee said, in awe. "Kate cut her hair off? She's been growin' that since we was kids. You should give it to Wash to hang onto it for her," she suggested.

"Okay," Simon said, "but I just came from the bridge, and he wasn't there. Any ideas?"

"Not a clue," Kaylee said, shaking her head. "River?"

"They're saving water," River told them with a wicked grin.

Kaylee giggled. "So that's what they're callin' it these days."

"Seems more to me they're wastin' water," Mal commented as he came in. "Been in there near an hour, an' you can't tell me either one of 'em's dirty enough - it ain't funny," he said, glaring at Kaylee and River, who were giggling.

"Perhaps a rephrasing is in order," Simon said quickly, smothering a snicker. "Any cleaning they needed to do is likely done. However -"

"They can 'however' in one o' their bunks an' save the water for the rest of us folk," Mal grumbled. "Ain't like they're the only two people on the gorram ship."

"Right now they are," River said dreamily.

~*~

"If I'm the father, you're the mother," Mal muttered, and Inara struggled to catch what he was saying. "The mother's the one that does the sex talks, an' you know all about sex, so it fits."

"What?" the former companion laughed. "What are you talking about?"

"Go tell your gorram kids to quit foolin' around in my showers. Other people have to use those, you know, an' it ain't like we can drill a new well when the water runs dry," Mal scowled. "Ain't it some kinda biohazard?"

"What's a biohazard?" Inara asked, doing everything she could to stifle her rising laughter. "Mal, in English, please."

"Gorram pilot," Mal ground out, "is sexin' the ruttin' cook. In the showers!"

"Mal," Inara sighed. "Stop worrying about those two. Personally, I think it's been a long time coming, if you'll pardon the turn of phrase."

"This just don't sit well," he insisted. "Don't care what you or Zoe says, I'm gonna drag my heels the whole way on this one."

"You're being a child about this," Inara said. "Don't you realize how utterly pointless all this fussing is? And, does it really make you feel better to keep grumbling about it?"

"Yes," Mal said stubbornly.

~*~

"I didn't know your hair was curly," Wash marvelled, as Kate toweled said hair. "How did I not know your hair is curly?"

"It's not, when it's long," Kate replied. "And, you know, tamed."

"Untamed," he repeated. "I like that. You should be untamed more often."

Kate stared at him a moment, then laughed at his dazed expression. "And you should hang bottom-up from the towel rack to get some of that blood circulating back to your brain."

"No, really," he protested. "You look so much younger - which, really? Makes me feel a little like a dirty old man. And it's not just your hair, you just look -" Wash paused. "You look -"

"Post-coital?" she smirked. "Next time Zoe stops by in my sleep I'll have to ask her if you were always chatty after sex, or if it's a recent development."

"It still creeps me out just the tiniest bit that we both dreamed about my wife on the same night," Wash said.

Kate shrugged. "Kaylee did, too, and Simon. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say she paid everyone a visit."

"You think?" Wash looked thoughtful. "You think she met Hannah?"

"Well," Kate considered. "There's not really any way to be sure unless Hannah either has a phenomenal memory or develops a phenomenal vocabulary very soon. Which, having Simon and River around, is not entirely impossible. But yeah, I think she probably wanted to see how everyone was doing, but she also wanted to make sure I was an okay person, and meet the child of the man she loves."

"So," Wash said. "Instead of meeting the parents you had to meet the spouse. That had to be awkward."

"Not really," Kate said, pulling a large towel around herself for the walk back to her room. "She was - I want to say serene, but also very kind. And she was gorgeous; you must have excellent taste." She turned and headed out into the hallway, leaving a surprised Wash behind.

"Finally," Jayne huffed as she passed him in the corridor. "Thought you was gonna be in there all damn day. I got oatmeal in places I didn't know I got - Gorramit, Wash, can't you put a towel on like normal folk?"