BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL

TONYAHUQT03

Kissing Trouble
Sunday, February 26, 2006

Wash and Zoe are having one of their "fights", Zoe kisses another guy, and Wash punches a guy. Wacky fun!


CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 2404    RATING: 9    SERIES: FIREFLY

A large hairy man hands Mal a bag full of coins. He takes them and jiggles them next to his ear. “Sounds ‘bout right. Good doing business with you.” Mal says as bows to the hairy man, who grunts and walks away. “We get paid?” Jayne asks as he picking his teeth with his knife. “Yes Jayne we got paid.” Mal sits down with Jayne and Zoë who are having a drink at a back table. “This was a good day.” Mal has a large smile on his face as he hands the bag to Zoë. “Almost too good, sir.” “Zoë, you're such a shā shǒu kùa ilè.” “I guess I am.” Jayne grabs the bag from her and opens it. He takes a coin out sniffs it then bites it. “Yeah Zoë, stop being such a shā shǒu kùa ilè.” Jayne says as he buffs the coin with his shirt sleeve. Zoë just looks at him and snatches the bag back. “Hey.” Jayne yells. “I was counting that.” “I’m going back to the ship.” Zoë looks at the offend Jayne. “Wave, Bernoulli, tell him we’ll have his share in a day or so.” Mal says as waves for the waitress to come over. “And Zoë…” Exacerbated, “Yes, Capitan?” “It’s a good day.” Mal smiles. The waitress comes over to Jayne and Mal. “Miss get me and my man here two shots of your finest whiskey. We’re celebrating our hǎo yùn.” Mal throws her a coin. “And peanuts.” Jayne throws in. “And peanuts.” Mal adds.

Zoë walks up the ramp to Serenity where is greeted by her husband. “We get paid?” “Yes.” “Shiny” Wash kisses her on her cheek. Kaylee comes in followed by Simon who looks frustrated. “Everything ok?” She gives Kaylee a concerned look. “Everything, shiny, just shiny.” Kaylee gives Simon an evil eye. “Did we get paid?” Simon said to break the tension. “Yes we did.” Wash answering and wrapping his hands around his wife. “And no bullets. And no one got shot?” Wash turning to Zoë. “Not yet, but the Captain and Jayne are still at the bar. Give it time.” “Still a mighty fine day, dear.” He kisses her on the cheek again. “Ah… well, I better prepare the infirmary just in case.” Simon turns to Kaylee who is completely ignoring him. “Ok then.” He turns and leaves. Zoë heads up the stairs to wave Bernoulli leaving Wash and Kaylee alone. “Do you want me to get Zoë to beat him up for you? I would but, I fight like a xǐao nǚ xúe shēng.” Wash smiling at her. “No, he just confusing, one minute everything going fine, then the next…” “Well don’t give up on him. If I would have given up on Zoë then… well we probably still be married now, because she’s attracted to my electrifying machismo.” Wash pats her on the head and heads back up the stairs. Kaylee takes a deep breath and heads back to the engine room.

“See ya then.” Zoë flips a couple of switches. “Inara?” Wash walks in and sits in his chair. “She’ll be here in 20 minutes or so.” Zoë lends against the console just looking at Wash. He is laid back in his chair with his serious face on. “Did you talk to him?” “Didn’t have time.” “You spent most of the day with him.” “Was on the job.” “We haven’t had a break in 4 months Cuddle Bunny, don’t you think we deserve some husband-wife time, without the others?” Zoë takes a deep breathe. She is tired of these conversations with her husband.

Mal and Jayne are enjoying their drinks while playing a game of Chinese checkers. There is a big commotion at the other end of the bar. Mal and Jayne are not concern. One of the men in the commotion yells out, “Let’s be civil here! We’re both grown men.” Mal turns to see what the problem is and he notices the man who is held up against the wall by a larger thug. He gulps down the rest of his drink and gets up. “Let’s go.” Mal has his serious face on. Jayne pays no attention and makes another move. “What? No I’m winning.” Jayne is proud of his move. “Jayne now.” Mal grabs him by the shirt collar and jerks him up accidentally knocking the board on the floor making a loud noise. Jayne looks down at the pieces on the floor. “Wèi, I was winning.”

“Mal? Malcolm Reynolds.” Mal keeps walking towards the door. The man calling him is the man hanging against the wall. “Awe come on Mal, I know it’s you. I could use some help over here.” “I think that pretty man hanging on the wall is calling you Mal.” Jayne scuffs. “I know he’s calling me, and that’s why we’re walking away.” Mal hurries trying to ignore the man in distress. “Come on Mal!” Mal under his breathe. “Shén me dōng, zhí dé wǒ zhè gè hùai yùn qì?” Mal turns around with a big fake grin on his face. “Adonis, buddy how are you doing? Mal walks over to where Adonis is and sizes up the man who is holding him. “Not so good Mal, this gorilla seems to have a hold on me.” “I get that.” Mal eyes the guy who is holding Adonis he has at least 5 inches and 40 pounds on Mal. “Ain’t none of your concern. Walk away.” The man who is holding Adonis tells Mal. He pulls back his coat to show his gun. The man looks down and doesn’t seem impressed. Mal looks at Jayne to join him in the fight that is about to happen. “Man’s right Mal, ain’t none of my concern.” Jayne said leading against the doorframe of the bar, picking at his teeth. “I would listen to your friend, pal.” The thug warns Mal. “Well he’s an idiot.” Mal replies as her punches the guy in the face. It doesn’t faze the thug. Mal shakes his hand. The thug drops Adonis and grabs Mal and throws him against the wall. “Told you, pal.” He laughs and turns back towards Adonis when Jayne jumps on him. Jayne wrestles with him for a while. Mal gets back up and punches him this time with the butt of his gun. The thug goes down. Mal points his gun in his face. “Now I would listen to me, walk away, Pal.” The thug wipes his face and stands up. He looks back at Adonis. He sitting with his leg’s cross. He looks back at Mal and Jayne spits and walks out the door. “Mal thank you. He was a peon who would listen to reason.” Adonis says. “A pe-what?” Jayne asks. “Let’s go.” Mal fixes his clothes. “Wait let me buy you a drink, for helping me out.” Adonis gets up and walks over to the bar. “We’re in a hurry, Jayne.” “I ain’t in no hurry.” Jayne joins Adonis at the bar. “Jayne.” “I want my reward.” Adonis hands Jayne his drink. He gulps it down in no time. Adonis tries to give Mal his drink. “No thank you.” Jayne takes Mal drink and gulps it down. Adonis and Mal both look at him. “What? You won’t gonna to drink it.” Mal heads for the door. “Mal wait.” “Don’t want to hear it Adonis. Happy to help you out with your friend there but, I don’t want to get tied up in any more of your messes.” Adonis lays more coins on the counter. “Get yourself more rounds.” He runs after Mal. “Shiny. Gèng dūo wēi shì jì jǐu!” Jayne orders him self another drink. “Come on Mal, don’t be like that.” “Adonis every time I’m around you I found myself in all kinds of trouble, and I ain’t looking for trouble.” “No trouble Mal, I promise. I just need a ride.” “A ride?” “Yeah to Eros. I got coin to pay for the fair.” Mal looks at him. Zoë had dated Adonis on and off after the war when they were living on Dalian a year before Mal bought Serenity. Adonis was a good looking man, strapping some might say with his long blonde hair, bronze skin, rippling muscles, striking blue eyes, dimples, too damn pretty. Mal never got why Zoë had bother with him. He was too pretty, pretty men cause trouble. “Hey I say if he got the fair.” Jayne staggers up to the men. He wraps his arm around Adonis and grins. “The first sign of trouble, I swear Adonis.” “No, trouble Mal. My hand to God.” “Shiny.” The three men head back to Serenity.

Wash and Zoë are still at a standstill. “Wash, start her up. Zoë I need you down here.” Mal voice through the comm. Zoë walks off the bridge. “Fēng māo mā mā hé tā de shàng dì! He calls and you go a running.” Wash says angrily as he flips some dials. Zoë stops at the door and pauses a moment. Then she continues on her way. “We’ll talk later Sweet cheeks.” He yells at her.

On her way to the cargo bay Zoë runs into Inara. “How was the caper?” “We got paid.” She says sarcastically. The two women head down the steps when Zoë stops mid step. Inara almost bumps into her. Inara gives her a concern look, “Zoë?” “Sir what is he doing here?” She continues down the stairs giving Mal the death look. Out of no where Adonis grabs her and kisses her. Zoë forgets where she is and kisses him back, hard. Jayne looks at Mal confused. “Huh?” Mal is just as confused. Wash comes from the bridge to the stairs. “Just heard from Bernilll…Inara why is my wife kissing that woman?” “Wash I don’t think that’s a woman.” “It has to be in my mind.” Wash pushes pass Inara. He clears his throat. Adonis and Zoë are still in their lip lock. “I’m standing right here!” Wash has his serious as hell look on his face. This breaks Zoë’s trance. This is one of the rare times that Zoë is ever caught off guard. She has no words to say. “Do you want tell me what the ránshāo hǔorè dìyù is going on here cause I’m lost.” Mal clears his throat, “Umm Adonis meet Zoë’s husband Wash. Wash this is Adonis an old friend of ours.” “You’re married?” Adonis looks at Zoë, who is still in shocked. “Yeah, she’s married, she married to me!” Wash gets in between the two of them. Adonis steps back to give him self room. “You’re married to him?” Wash is staring him down. “What do you mean to ‘him’?” Kaylee comes in to see what all the commotion is all about. “Captain what going on, why is Wash so mad?” Jayne answers her, laughing, “Zoë kissed that guy.” “Zoë what? Captain did Zoë kiss him? Who is he?” “Zoë you going to tell this piece of crap that we’re happily married?” “Well if you where so happily married then why’d she kiss me. Zoë you can’t be married to this guy?” Zoë just stands in silence staring straight at Mal. She couldn’t believe that he brought Adonis on Serenity knowing their history. Zoë dated Adonis on and off. Mostly off because Adonis was also dating 4 other women and those where the ones Zoë found out about. He was a playboy. The last time she saw Adonis he was laying on the floor, with a busted lip. After Zoë punched him, when he ask for a threesome.

Adonis and Wash stood eye to eye. Adonis was tall and had an exquisite body compare to Wash. Zoë gets in between the two men, facing Wash. She takes his hand and tries to take him back upstairs. He doesn’t move. She can see the hurt in his eyes. He jerks his hand from hers and storms back up the stairs. She doesn’t follow him she just watches him as he walks away. Mal getting tried of the tension on his boat grabs Adonis. “I told you no trouble, and look what I got, trouble.” “Mal, I wouldn’t of, if I knew…hey she kissed me back!” Adonis tried to defend himself to Mal. Mal’s fist began to rise, but Zoë stopped him and nodded her head no. He looks at her to make sure, if that is what she wanted, because he had no problem hitting him. He can tell that she is sure. Zoë walks towards the kitchen. “Why ain’t she going after Wash.” Kaylee looks around at her crewmates. Everyone is standing confused because they still can’t process what had just happened. “You still going give me a ride right Mal?” Zoë wasn’t here, so Mal punched him knocking him out. “Mal.” Inara exclaims. He just looks at her with a grin, steps over Adonis, and heads for the bridge.

Wash is in his chair staring out the window. “Set a course for Eros.” Wash doesn’t answer him. He is just looking out the window. Louder Mal ask him, “Set a course for Eros.” Wash turns around slowly his eyes and face are red with anger. Mal is taken back at this. He seen Wash mad before, but this was a different level of mad. “I need you to set a course of Eros.” Wash gets up and stares Mal down. “Set it yourself.” He bumps into Mal hard as the heads for the door. Mal grabs him and pushes him against the wall of the bridge. “I ain’t askin’.” Wash pushes him off and sets a course.

Simon is in the cargo bay examining Adonis. Kaylee and Inara are sitting on the stairs watching Simon work. Jayne who is clearly drunk. “Hmm, I like the guy.” Everyone looks at him. Jayne doesn’t care and heads for his bunk. “Why didn’t Zoë go after Wash? Don’t make no sense.” Kaylee ask, she look really worried. Mal comes down looking angry. “Don’t you people have places you should be? Kaylee close her up. We’re taking off.” “Mal who is this guy?” Inara ask. “Trouble.” He walks past them and steps over Simon and Adonis. “Make sure you don’t scar his pretty face.” Simon just looks up at Mal, and continues his work.

Mal heads to the kitchen. Zoë is there sitting in the corner with her knees tucked into her chest in the kitchen. He fixes her and him self tea. “Never knew you not to fight for something you wanted.” He hands her the mug. She turns and looks at him. Her eyes are red. Mal can’t remember if he ever seen her cry. “Adonis is an ass, always has been. Never got why you took a liking to him. But couldn’t say I wasn’t happy when I saw that busted lip you gave him.” Mal laughs a little. “Zoë, I find most things in life are worth fighting for.” Mal gets up and leaves Zoë alone with her thoughts.

Adonis woke to find himself in the infirmary. “What happen?” Simon takes a small flashlight and shines it in his eyes. “Captain punched you.” “Mal hit me?” “Yes.” Simon cuts the light off and hands him a couple of pills. “For your head.” “Thanks.” Adonis swallows the pills and jumps off the bed. “Where’s Zoë?” looks around when Mal comes into the infirmary. Mal is looking at Adonis sternly. “Leave her be.” “But, Mal.” “But nothing. I should of thrown your pretty butt off my boat the moment you pulled that stunt.” “I didn’t know she was taken.” “Don’t matter, Adonis. You just don’t go kissing every woman you see fit to.” “Zoë ain’t just any ole woman Mal, you know that. We got a history.” “Yeah a history. And now I got a love sick pilot and a Zoë who all crotchety. I tend to like my Zoë in a good mood.” Adonis is now standing in front of Mal. “Mal.” “Look I said that I would take you to Eros, and that’s what I plan to do. Stay away from her until we land and we won’t have a problem. But Adonis I swear by your pretty blonde locks if you do any thing else to upset her, I will throw you out the airlock.” Mal walks out the room. Adonis turns to Simon. He just gives him an uneasy smile. Simon shows him where he can sleep until they reach their destination. “Find me if there are any problems.” “Problems?” “With your head.” “Oh.” Simon walks out the room. Adonis lies down on the bed, but can’t get any peace. So he wanders about. Everyone else is asleep by this time. He finds him self heading towards the bridge. He knocks at the door. Wash is in his chair sulking. Adonis knocks again. Wash turns around and looks at him. If looks could kill Adonis would be dead. “Can I come in?” Adonis asks as he steps into the bridge. Wash doesn’t answer him and just turns back around. “Look, I’m sorry. Didn’t know she was taken. I wouldn’t of…she kissed me back…” Wash turns and looks at him. “…I mean…I respect the sanctity of marriage…” Wash gets up and now is standing nose to nose with Adonis. “…but you gotta know that Zoë is a beautiful woman…and you know how passin…” Wash punches him. “Ouch.” He shakes the pain out of his hand. Mal and Kaylee come out their bunks when Adonis hits the floor. “Wash did you hit him?” Kaylee ask as she walks over to him stepping over the unconscious Adonis. “Good job. He’s too pretty anyway.” She gives him a big smile. “Wash you…uh…couldn’t say I didn’t see that coming.” Mal looks down at Adonis. “Kaylee why don’t you go and fetch Simon and tell him Adonis hit his head on Wash’s fist.” Kaylee jumps over Adonis to go get Simon. Wash is sucking on his bruised fist. “You know you shouldn’t hit a man with a closed fist…but it still hilarious.” Mal hits Wash on the back. “Got that out your system?” “Yeah.” Wash is still sucking on his hand. “Good, now go find your wife and talk to her…” Mal heads back to his bunk. Simon and Kaylee passes Mal as he heads down. “Look like you got a patient…” Mal laughs. “Night all.” Wash goes back to his chair and sits. Simon waves something in front of Adonis’s nose to wake him up. He flashes the light in the confused Adonis’s eyes. “I’m fine Doctor.” “You had two pretty hard hits to your head today…I think that you should come back to the infirmary…” “I’m good Doctor, really.” Adonis gets up. He looks at back at Wash and heads back to his room. “Wash do you need me to look at your hand?” “Hand’s fine, Simon.” Wash replies. Simon and Kaylee head back to their bunks leaving Wash alone. You could hear a pin dropped on Serenity. Everyone seemed to keep to themselves. Wash stayed on the bridge, Zoë in the cargo bay, Inara on her shuttle, Kaylee engine room, Shepherd and Jayne in their bunks, Simon and River in the infirmary, and Mal stayed in the kitchen. All this tension made him hungry. It had been 2 days since they dropped off Adonis on Eros. Zoë and Wash hadn’t patched things up. Serenity was headed to Paquin. Kaylee had to do some repairs on the ground. Mal had a girl there who was willing to trade some parts that Kaylee needed if he could take some cargo to Isis Canyon for her. Zoë was sitting on a crate when River came and sat beside her. Zoë didn’t even notice the girl sitting beside her. River took her hand and intertwined their fingers together. “Love a mirage of the mind, it's an illusion, it's fake, impossible to find…” River seems to study their hands together, turning them around. “Fingers spread like fine spun gold nestling to the fold…silken thread, it holds fast. Bonds like that are meant to last. At times thread may break…” River let’s go of her hand. “Another one forms in its wake. Makes the bind closer and keeps it strong.” “River?” Simon called. “River don’t bother Zoë.” Simon comes over to them. “She wasn’t being a bother, Doctor.” This was the first time Zoë had talked to anyone. Simon just gave an uneasy smile and lead River out the cargo bay.

Wash was in his pilot chair. He seem to become one with his chair seeing the only time he left it was to go to the bathroom or to get something to eat. He was fiddling with one of his dinosaurs when Mal came in. “How much longer until we get to Paquin?” “Couple of hours.” “Good. Wave Stella and tell her that we’ll be there soon.” “Yes, sir, Capitan, sir.” Mal didn’t like the tone in Wash voice he was being a smart ass, but he let it go. He was leaving when he ran into Zoë. He hadn’t so much as to look at her the past few days. He was afraid of what she might do to him, because he brought Adonis on board. “Be on Paquin in a couple of hours.” “That’s good…how long we’re going to be there?” “Maybe a day or so, depending on how long it takes Kaylee to fix what’s got to be fix.” They stood there for a moment before Zoë headed for the bridge. “Zoë…” Mal calls. She stops but doesn’t look back. “We need him to land us on Paquin...” This time she looks at him. Right away he regretted what he just said, but he also knows how those two are. Wash can’t ever land straight if he and Zoë are having a fight. It gets all bumpy.

Zoë sits in the co pilot chair. Wash doesn’t even look at her. He is just flipping switches trying to look busy. Zoë had gone over and over in her head what she wanted to say to him, but she was at a lost for words. She got up and took his hand. It was still swollen where he had hit Adonis. He stopped what he was doing. Wash had come up with some convincing arguments himself to say to her. He had even practiced what to say with Rex. But none of them seem to matter. Wash pulled her down on his lap so they where facing each other. He just looked into her eyes. Hell, he couldn’t even remember why he was so mad at her, how could he when those big brown eyes were looking at him. She put her other hand on his face. She couldn’t believe it had been so long since she touched her husband. They just sat there holding each other and gazing into each other eyes.

Everybody else was in the kitchen. Kaylee and Inara were sitting in the corner. Inara was braiding Kaylee’s hair. Mal, Jayne, Shepherd, and Simon where playing cards at the table. River was standing in the door frame, whispering nothings to her self. The ship jilted and so did everyone else. “We hit?” Shepherd Book asks Mal. Mal gets up angrily and almost falls into River when the ship shifts again. “No, we ain’t hit.” Mal walks up to the bridge. “Shàngdì zài tīantáng! You two have a bunk for that?” Mal covers his eyes. Wash and Zoë are in a compromising position. The ship shifts again. “Wash we breaking atmo? Don’t you think that you should be paying attention to what your doing?” “I am sir.” Wash replies as he kisses Zoë on the neck. The ship is beginning to shake. “Zoë!” Mal sound peeved. “Pilot first, Dear.” “That’s all I’m asking.” Mal walks away. “Zhè xīe hái zi hùan bìng ài fēng kúang!”

COMMENTS

Monday, February 27, 2006 10:08 AM

COPILOT


Funny Funny stuff thanks for the laugh.

Sunday, April 9, 2006 7:26 AM

BELLONA


heeheeheeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! i love it!!!

b

Wednesday, December 20, 2006 3:31 AM

NAUTICALGAL


I love this idea to pieces! And this line: "well we probably still be married now, because she’s attracted to my electrifying machismo.”

I do wish you would flesh out your writing a bit. It reads all in a headlong rush; I wish you'd add enough details to the dialog and the stage direction that it would slow down, and be more savory.


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