OK Folks, It’s Jaylee. It’s a ruttin’ Jaylee Epic. Not your cuppa? Keep on walkin’.

Disclaimer: Not mine, no pay.

Thanks: To Jacqui, Josh and to Rion, my own personal BDH. You guys are the greatest.

Rating: PG-15, angst

Remarks: Set after “Objects in Space”. Inara has departed from Serenity and the crew has been through a rough stretch. Click on my name to read the backstory. They’re all backstory.

Feedback: Love your comments, folks! It only takes a minute and is genuinely appreciated. What did you like? What doesn’t work? You can post below or email to Lumenea@aol.com

Leaps of Faith

Chapter Seventeen

That afternoon, Simon examines Jayne’s wound and decides to leave the bandage off long enough for Jayne to get a shower. Thanks to his skillful suturing and the gelfoam’s ability to speed healing, the wound is filled with healthy new granulation tissue and closing in nicely.

“You’re a lucky man, Jayne. Half an inch more to the right and that bullet would have severed your femoral artery. Could have lost a testicle, or even bled to death if Mal hadn’t been so quick to respond.”

The merc nods, takin' in what the doc has said, then admits, “Doc, you and I ain’t never gonna like one another. Lots a reasons for that beyond both lovin’ the same woman. But I wanna thank you for pullin’ me through all this and say I’m sorry for what I done back on Ariel. You can believe me or not, but I mean it.”

For a minute Simon studies the mercenary, trying to decide whether to take his apology at face value, and decides that only time will tell.

Shepherd Book sticks his head into the medlab and with his help and the use of the cane that Kaylee has fabricated, Jayne manages to hobble to the shower. In the mean time, Book makes up the spare guest quarter right next to the head so that Jayne can easily get back and forth until his leg has healed enough to get him up and down the ladder to his bunk.

++++

The tall, heavily muscled dark-haired man appearing half an hour later looks reborn. He’s wrapped a towel around his narrow waist and even shaved for the first time in over a week.

As Jayne emerges from the head, Kaylee comes downstairs carrying a tray with supper: fried protein slabs sandwiched between thick slices of fresh-baked bread and the last of the previous night’s soup. They look at one another somewhat hesitantly, then Kaylee smiles tentatively.

“Boy, that smells good.” The merc remarks and grins. “Might even eat the tray for dessert.”

Kaylee and Shepherd Book laugh. It’s good to see Jayne on his feet again, even if he is still pretty wobbly.

“We’re going to put him in this first cabin, Kaylee. Makes it easier for everyone for now. Why don’t you just set the tray down in there and I’ll help him get situated.”

++++

When Jayne has finished his supper, Kaylee comes back to pick up his tray and dishes. She’s carrying some folded clothes and finds him sitting up in bed, the covers pulled up around his waist.

“I figured you might not appreciate sittin’ around in a towel all the time, so I grabbed some of your t-shirts and sweat pants, least-wise the cleanest ones. If there’s somethin’ special ya want or need, let me know and I’ll fetch it for ya.”

He can see she’s still wary and uncertain.

“Can I talk ya into sittin’ with me a little while? It’s mighty quiet down here. Ain’t even got guns to clean or nothin. I'm bout ta go outta m'mind.” He pats the futon and smiles wistfully at her.

Kaylee pauses, then piles the clothing on the end of the bed and gingerly sits down beside the merc. “I guess it has been pretty boring for ya down here by yerself all day. 'Sides, I got things I need to say to ya.”

“Kaylee, I… “

“Now hush, Jayne, and just hear me out. I did as much for you last night, with no small measure of pain and confusion for my trouble.”

“We’ve both hurt each other this past week, done it without even intendin’ to. A lot of that happened because we were both holdin’ things inside we shoulda been sharin’ with one another. It’s the very same thing as made Inara leave Serenity – her and Mal not bein’ able to really speak what was in their hearts.” Kaylee looks up into those fiercely beautiful blue-gray eyes and hope's that Jayne can really take in what she's telling him.

He thinks on this a minute and knows the truth of it, then nods slightly.

“I understand that you ain’t used to openin’ up to anyone and I’m still getting’ used to Inara bein’ gone. Ain’t neither one of us ever had a steady regular-like lover before, and bein’ sweeties or even bunkin’ together ain’t like whorin’ or sportin’ with the farm boys back home.”

“I know,” he replies and she shushes him.

“I done me a lot of thinkin’ last night late, trying to digest what all you said. An’ I talked a bunch with Shepherd Book this mornin’."

Her voice becomes softer, more thoughtful. "So what I’ve figured out so far is this: I don’t hold your past against ya. A man does what he has to, to survive."

She smiles softly at him as she continues, "An’ I understand that what you do has risks, now more’n ever. Ain’t nothin guaranteed for any of us. I’m just a lil’ ship’s mechanic and I got shot. We’re just lucky we got us a good doctor here on Serenity. And that brings me to a part of all this I’m still strugglin’ with, Jayne.”

She lays her left hand over his, the first time she’s touched him since last night, feels the blood pulsing through his veins, the sweet warmth of him.

“I know you got a real protective nature. Seen how quick you react when somethin’ or someone important to you is threatened. I know some of that’s about it bein’ your job, bein’ a mercenary and all. But some of it’s about us all being like family here, too. That means all looking out for each other, being concerned for each other and tryin’ to get along, because we all gotta depend on each other.”

“I guess I never thought on it like that, thought of them two as family.” Jayne admits. “To my mind, they was just fugies. We took ‘em on, temporary-like. Hell, we didn’t even know the doc had his sister on ice in a box to begin with, much less that she’d be a psycho killergirl.”

“Jayne!”

“But Kaylee, it’s true! While you and Mal and the others were getting’ all familyfied about ‘em, all I could see was the risks they were posin' for us. There we was, goin’ along just doin’ jobs and functionin’ as a tight-knit crew, everyone knowin’ their role. But after Persephone, we got us a whole new batch of unpredictable folk, none of ‘em bein’ what they claim to be.”

“It was ‘cause of Simon and River that gorram Fed came onboard, and the liou mahng damn near killed you. Hell yes, they had a big reward on ‘em, and you know as well as I how bad we couldda used that money, but most of all, they’re just wild cards and we ain’t never gonna be able to relax so long as they’re on board.”

“Jayne, Simon and River are part of this family, too, even if you didn’t see them that way." She pokes him in the chest. "If you’d been successful in turning them in to the Feds back on Ariel, you’d be dead now, and there’s no mistakin’ that truth. Sometimes ya don’t like someone in your family, but you still gotta look out for them.”

She looks up intently at him. “You don’t have to like Simon, but you do have to help protect him, because he takes care of all of us. He’s been bein’ a real gentleman about me decidin' to be with you and you need to be the same.” She slides her other hand under his, sandwiching his big one between her two small ones.

“An’ River’s a mystery. She might not ever be right, and there are times she even scares me. But Jayne, she’s still family, and you just can’t sell out family. Besides, she was the one figured out how to get rid of Early and that counts for somethin’ in my mind.”

The big man considers that and nods in agreement.

Kaylee goes on, “If you an’ me are gonna continue on bein’ lovers, Jayne, I gotta be able to trust you. I gotta be able to tell you what’s in my heart and know you’ll do the same with me. And I gotta know that you’re not just thinkin’ about what’s best for you but considerin’ what’s best for all of us.”

“You ain’t gonna be in no shape to be sexin’ up anybody for awhile and that may be just as well. We need some time to work this stuff out, get comfortable with each other again, learn to trust again."

She stands up and leans over to kiss him ever so lightly, then picks up the tray and dishes. "I ain’t promisin’ you nothin, you hard-headed hundan, ‘cept that we’ll see how things go.” As she turns to head back upstairs, the merc calls after her, “Who’s too messed up for sexin’?”

(To be continued...)