PLEASE read the warning in chapter 1 of this story.

For any new readers, please do not start reading this series with this chapter. It would be far less confusing if you go back and read to the start of this series.

I do appreciate constructive criticism so if you have some, by all means, leave a review and let me know what you did or did not like, or even if there is something that you would like to see happen.

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Chapter 2

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Simon wandered aimlessly for an unmeasured amount of time, his mind dazedly trying to comprehend what had just happened. The lights had been dimmed and thankfully, there was no one awake. He wasn’t sure what he would say if someone found him wandering the hallways in the middle of the night. When he finally noticed where he was, he was staring at the cargo bay floor, not even noticing the cold of the metal seeping into his bare feet. He slumped onto the bottom metal stair and held his head in his hands.

With an anguished groan, he realized that he had suspected everything that Kaylee had just told him at one time or another. After he’d recovered from his drug-induced haze, and while the women were secluded away in Inara’s shuttle, he had approached the Captain. Hot tears rolled down his cheeks as he recalled that conversation with a clarity that shocked and frightened him. “Mal?” Simon entered the galley quietly, grateful he wouldn’t have to search all over the ship for the man. He’d already put this conversation off too long. He couldn’t delay it further.

“Yeah, Simon?” Mal looked as weary as Simon felt.

“I need to talk to you about –“ he loathed to bring up the subject. But they needed to talk about it. Simon needed to know. “– about what happened.”

“What about it?”

“I don’t –“ Simon took a deep breath. He’d done this before. He’d seen cases similar to this in the ER. He needed to turn off his emotions and slip into doctor mode but it was difficult when he thought about such a personal violation happening to someone he loved more than his own life. He exhaled slowly. “You saw them right after. I was unconscious. Did they – were they –“

Mal knew exactly what Simon was trying to ask. He, himself, had considered the possibility and Inara had skirted the subject when he even tried to talk about the attack which worried him more than he wanted to admit. “I don’t know,” Mal sighed. “I’m – I tried to ask Inara. She weren’t forthcomin’ with any useful information. Gorram woman has to be so mysterious.”

“I need to examine them. I need to know. They’ll need –“

“They took showers right after it happened, Simon. What’re you hopin’ to find?”

Simon closed his eyes and sank into the nearest chair. Any evidence would be gone. Unless the women spoke of it, they, would never know for sure.

Simon clenched his fists, his chest heaving with large sobbing breaths. Why didn’t Kaylee tell him? Why would she keep this from him? How had she been a wreck one moment and a few days later happy and near to her own cheerful self again? He didn’t understand. He leaned his head back on the railing and glanced up, his unfocused eyes falling on Inara’s shuttle.

Simon immediately launched himself to his feet. Inara. After Kaylee had returned from her few days of seclusion with the former Companion, she had been better, back to her normal, if not yet giggly, bubbly self. Out of respect for the women, Simon had never pressured Kaylee or Inara to tell him what had happened during those few days.

He’d convinced himself that no one recovered from such a physical violation so quickly. And so Simon and Mal had deduced that it couldn’t have happened and buried their fears.

All these months later, Simon now recognized the signs he had fought so hard to believe were not there. Hot tears rolled down his cheeks at his stupidity. He bounded up the staircase and pounded on the locked door so hard his hands began to hurt.

When a sleepy Mal pulled open the door with a look of supreme annoyance on his face, Simon didn’t bother to acknowledge the man. He pushed past the Captain and strode toward the bed, standing rigidly over an equally sleepy Inara.

“Simon – what the gui is –“

“Bi zui!” Simon didn’t even look at Mal.

His protective instincts kicked in for Inara and their unborn child and Mal immediately grabbed Simon’s tense arms, not noticing the thin lines of blood that dotted his bare shoulders.

Mal misjudged the strength in Simon’s lithely muscled body too late when the enraged doctor whirled and pushed the man so hard he fell back against a nearby table, loudly shattering a glass decanter that rested atop it.

Simon whirled on Inara again, fists clenching and unclenching in irritation, his eyes glowing pillars of rage as they stared at her. “Did you know?!”

Inara gasped at the pain and fury dripping from Simon’s voice. She’d never seen him so angry and she reached, with some difficulty, to light the lamp sitting on the bedside table.

“Tell me!”

“Ta ma de hun dan!” Mal pushed himself to his feet and reached for the furious doctor. ”Get away from her, Simon!”

The horrified look on Inara’s face told Simon everything he needed to know. “Why didn’t you tell me she’d been raped!?” Simon cried and for the first time she noticed his face was streaked with tears.

Mal froze in mid step, his gaze shifting from Inara to the rigidly tense Simon standing far too close to her.

“Shen me?” Mal asked around the growing lump in his throat.

Inara pushed herself to the end of the bed, tears forming in her eyes. She didn’t know what had happened but Simon was as angry as she’d ever seen him, and it frightened her. “I didn’t – ” She reached a trembling hand out to him but he backed away, shaking his head. “Kaylee didn’t know. She couldn’t remember.”

Mal’s mouth moved but no words came out. Old worries rushed to the forefront of his mind. He and Simon had briefly discussed this possibility right after the attack. But it had been six months since – Mal gulped nervously as another thought struck him. The baby.

“And you didn’t think it might be wise to at least advise her husband that this could have happened!? Even if she didn’t know for sure? I could have helped. I could have -” Simon was shaking with an uncharacteristic rage that struck the fear of God into Inara – and, truth be told, Mal.

Mal could see that Simon wanted desperately to hit something and quickly situated himself between the enraged doctor and Inara, waiting for his bao bei to reply.

When Inara answered, her voice was low, ashamed. “She didn’t want you to know.”

“Didn’t want me to –“ Simon stumbled back and shoved a hand through his already disheveled hair. He took a few desperately calming breaths as Mal disbelievingly watched the play of emotions cross his face as well as Inara’s. Venom dripped from his lips as he hissed, “You had no right.”

Inara’s heart broke for him but she’d had quite enough of his belittling a situation he knew next to nothing about. “Right?” Inara took a step closer and Mal swallowed nervously when he saw the furious look in her eyes. “Do you think we asked for what happened to us? Asked to be raped in our own home! With only you left here to protect us if the job went wrong!”

Simon visibly flinched at the rebuke.

Mal’s breath caught as he watched the tears snake down Inara’s cheeks. He recoiled as if he’d been shot. We?

“What?” Mal and Simon asked together.

Inara turned from them and shrugged into her robe. “I need to see her.”

“Oh no you don’t.” Mal finally found his voice and caught her arm, turning her to face him. “Not until you tell me what’s going on.”

With a jolt that sent Simon’s already overloaded system into shock, he suddenly understood. His hands trembled with anger and now shame as Inara’s words finally registered in his mind. “Ta ma da. I failed you both.” It wasn’t a question. It was an anguished sob that tore from his very heart. It hadn’t just been Kaylee. Those men had violated both women.

Inara stumbled away from Mal and reluctantly met his eyes. Recalling her earlier hurtful words to Simon, blaming him for his lack of ability to protect them, she answered truthfully, her voice soft now but her eyes blazing with an unfathomable pain. “Yes. You did.”

~*~

River lay in her bunk, tears flowing out the corner of her eyes in a steady, unending stream. Although, she could not hear her brother’s voice, she could hear his grief-stricken words in her head, feel his anger as he confronted Inara.

She gazed, unblinking, up at the ceiling as the hard, painful sobs shook her shoulders. There was nothing she could do for him now. He would make his way to her – eventually. And the fury he had loosed at Inara would pale in comparison to the anger that would be directed at his psychic sister.

~*~

Simon’s voice carried through the cargo bay and into the passenger dorms where Kaylee lay still sobbing against her pillow. Even through the haze of pain and shame, she rolled over and glanced toward the door Simon had left open when she’d demanded he leave. She could hear the anger and anguish in his voice but couldn’t hear Inara’s responses.

Suddenly afraid, Kaylee pushed herself out of bed, gasping as the baby placed a sound, hard kick to her right side. She doubled over gasping, for a few long agonizingly emotional moments, before pulling on some clothing and hurrying toward the cargo bay.

She huffed and puffed as she climbed the metal stairs, her knuckles white as they clenched the metal railing. By the time she reached the open shuttle door, she couldn’t hear voices any longer. For a moment, an icy fear gripped her heart and when she stepped inside what she saw made her heart plummet to her ankles.

Inara sat on the bed, stoically refusing to sob despite the tears that marred paths down her smooth cheeks. Her hands cradled her swollen belly, as if protecting the little life within.

Mal stood a few feet away, his entire body tense, his arms hanging limp at his sides as he stared at Inara, a look of disbelief filling his eyes and turning his lips.

Simon stood closest to the door, his hands clenched info fists, a look of disgusted horror on his face.

“’Nara?”

With some difficulty, Inara pushed herself off the bed and hurried to Kaylee’s side.

The two men could only stand dumbly, shock and shame registering on their faces as the older woman led Kaylee to the bed.

“Sit down, mei mei. The stress isn’t good for the baby.”

Kaylee began to speak as if they were the only two in the room. “It all came back, ‘Nara! All of it! I didn’t know! I was wrong! But my body knew. I should have listened! I should have known!“ She collapsed against her best friend, sobbing hysterically. “I couldn’t fight back. They were too strong. But I remember it all now.”

Simon made a forward move and Inara stared at him, the look on her face explaining quite plainly, if not painfully, that he needed to stay right where he was. She regretted her earlier words now. He didn’t deserve her wrath. It wasn’t his fault that they’d been attacked. He had tried to protect them. And the overwhelmingly helpless and painful look on his face now made her tears roll faster and hotter down her smooth cheeks. She would apologize to him later. Kaylee needed her now.

“I think I did know.” Kaylee’s voice was muffled. “I just didn’t want to admit it.”

“You couldn’t remember, sweetie. It’s not your fault.” Inara tore her gaze from Simon and cradled the girl’s head as if it was a baby. A sob finally escaped her lips as she remembered the first time this had happened to her. All those years ago. It had nearly destroyed her. Just imagining what the knowledge would do to Kaylee frightened her. And she didn’t have a baby to worry about then as Kaylee did now.

“Kaylee –“ Simon ignored Inara’s warning look and took a step forward.

“Simon, you need to leave.” Inara’s voice was firm, unwavering. She glanced at Mal. “You too. Go please.”

Mal finally found his voice. “What? I don’t think so.”

“No,” Simon said, his gaze hardening.

“Get. Out!” Inara cried, her voice taking on a tone neither man had heard before. They needed to be alone. She needed to know what Kaylee had remembered. She needed to help the younger girl.

Simon and Mal recoiled as if they’d just had a hot, sharp poker shoved into their hearts and Inara instantly regretted the harsh tone.

“Please,” her voice softened. “Let us talk for a few moments. You can come back later.”

Kaylee glanced tearfully up at her husband and begged. “Please go.”

Simon shook his head and backed toward the door, stumbling over some unidentifiable thing in his way as he complied with his wife’s request.

Mal set his jaw determined not to budge from his spot. He wanted, no needed, answers and he wasn’t leaving until he got them. But Inara sent him a withering glare when he didn’t move, which sent him storming out of the shuttle, slamming the door shut behind him.

TBC

------------- Chinese Translations:

Gui – hell Bi zui – shut up Ta ma de hun dan – mother humping son of a bitch Shen me – what?

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Review and let me know what you thought. It'll make me post faster, really :)

These chapters are short for a reason. They're angsty enough and I don't want to overload the reader with it.