REAL WORLD EVENT DISCUSSIONS

Jokes

POSTED BY: SIGNYM
UPDATED: Wednesday, February 14, 2018 09:00
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Friday, January 19, 2018 3:28 AM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


My supervisor told me that people were complaining that I intimidated them.


So I stared at him until he apologized.


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Friday, January 19, 2018 5:53 PM

SECOND

The Joss Whedon script for Serenity, where Wash lives, is Serenity-190pages.pdf at https://www.mediafire.com/two


Historian Who Correctly Predicted Every Presidential Win Since Reagan Believes Trump Will Be Impeached
www.alternet.org/news-amp-politics/historian-who-correctly-predicted-e
very-presidential-win-reagan-believes-trump


The evidence against the president could force his party's hand.



The Joss Whedon script for Serenity, where Wash lives, is Serenity-190pages.pdf at www.mediafire.com/folder/1uwh75oa407q8/Firefly

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Friday, January 19, 2018 6:03 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


HAHAHAHA!!!! That's a good one, SECOND!

-----------
Pity would be no more,
If we did not MAKE men poor - William Blake

America is an oligarchy
http://www.fireflyfans.net/mthread.aspx?tid=57876

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Friday, January 19, 2018 6:04 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Seen in a cubicle:

"I'm already tired tomorrow."



-----------
Pity would be no more,
If we did not MAKE men poor - William Blake

America is an oligarchy
http://www.fireflyfans.net/mthread.aspx?tid=57876

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Friday, January 19, 2018 8:48 PM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Seen in a dirty men's public bathroom:

"Why you reading the wall for jokes? You're holding it in your hand."

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Friday, January 19, 2018 10:18 PM

1KIKI

Goodbye, kind world (George Monbiot) - In common with all those generations which have contemplated catastrophe, we appear to be incapable of understanding what confronts us.


Seen in what used to be a men's bathroom

some people come here to sit and think
others come here to shit and stink
but I come here to feel my balls
and read the writing on the walls




It's time to read the writing on the walls.

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Saturday, January 20, 2018 8:26 AM

SECOND

The Joss Whedon script for Serenity, where Wash lives, is Serenity-190pages.pdf at https://www.mediafire.com/two


Quote:

Originally posted by SIGNYM:
HAHAHAHA!!!! That's a good one, SECOND!

I prefer observational humor:

Thank God for the leadership of a conservative president whose lawyer paid tens of thousands of dollars in hush money to a porn star through a shell company and false names.

One more observation based on current events, but it's complicated, which makes it funnier:

It takes a special type of hypocrite to accuse your opponents of hypocrisy for following in your footsteps. The GOP is built on principle. As a matter of principle, the GOP believes it is the only party that can shut down government as a negotiating tactic. The Democrats’ job is to keep that government open and to cave in to its demands.


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Saturday, January 20, 2018 8:30 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


At the end of the day, it's We The People who lose either way. I don't see any of them going without their paychecks or health benefits, even when the government is shut down.

This government needs an enema, and I don't believe that Trump was it.


It's time for at least a 3 party system. All Democrats and Republicans do is continue to pretend to fail and keep us all arguing with each other. In actuality, things are going exactly the way they have them planned for us.


"A Government Of The People, By The People, For The People".

Now there's a joke.

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Saturday, January 20, 2018 9:39 AM

SECOND

The Joss Whedon script for Serenity, where Wash lives, is Serenity-190pages.pdf at https://www.mediafire.com/two


Quote:

Originally posted by 6IXSTRINGJACK:

It's time for at least a 3 party system.

Here's some more observational humor: The winner-take-all system in the U.S. favors two stable parties. Not three. Not four. You can thank James Madison, Thomas Jefferson and John Adams for that miscalculation! In other words: the Constitution has to be revised if you want more than two stable and major political parties. Was that funny or just uncomfortable?
www.factcheck.org/2008/01/why-only-two-political-parties/

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Saturday, January 20, 2018 9:55 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Yeah. I don't believe they were planning on Republicans and Democrats to be what we were stuck with back then.

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Saturday, January 20, 2018 10:19 AM

SECOND

The Joss Whedon script for Serenity, where Wash lives, is Serenity-190pages.pdf at https://www.mediafire.com/two


Quote:

Originally posted by 6IXSTRINGJACK:
Yeah. I don't believe they were planning on Republicans and Democrats to be what we were stuck with back then.

The joke is getting less funny with repeated telling but if the U.S.A. is equally divided three ways: liberal, moderate, and conservative then with a winner-take-all system there will be two out of every three Americans that are deeply unhappy with the winner. It gets either funnier or weirder if the U.S.A. is equally divided four ways (I have no idea what to call the 4th political party, but may be the "Don't Vote" Party) then three out of four Americans will be deeply unhappy with the winner. Winner-take-all is a good laugh, yes? No?

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Saturday, January 20, 2018 11:44 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Quote:

Originally posted by second:
Winner-take-all is a good laugh, yes? No?



Any way you look at it you lose.

Koo Koo Kachoo!

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Sunday, January 21, 2018 8:25 AM

SECOND

The Joss Whedon script for Serenity, where Wash lives, is Serenity-190pages.pdf at https://www.mediafire.com/two


Quote:

Originally posted by 6IXSTRINGJACK:
Quote:

Originally posted by second:
Winner-take-all is a good laugh, yes? No?



Any way you look at it you lose.

Koo Koo Kachoo!

More observational humor (or people are funny about forming political parties):

I don’t wish to run afoul of a phenomenon known as “minimal group identification,” discovered by the social psychologist Henri Tajfel. Tajfel brought his research subjects into his lab and sat them down in front of a screen, onto which he flashed a number of dots. The subjects were asked to estimate their quantity. Then he categorized his subjects as overestimators vs underestimators, as well as accurate vs inaccurate, and put them into groups corresponding to their performance. Then he asked them to divide money among the members of all the groups.

Tajfel found that his subjects displayed a marked preference for their own group members, rejecting an egalitarian distribution strategy and disproportionately rewarding those with whom they now identified.

Other researchers have assigned people to different groups using ever more arbitrary strategies, such as flipping a coin. It didn’t matter, even when the subjects were informed of the way the groups were composed. People still favoured the co-members of their personal group.

Tajfel’s studies demonstrated two things: first, that people are social; second, that people are antisocial. People are social because they like the members of their own group. People are antisocial because they don’t like the members of other groups. Exactly why this is so has been the subject of continual debate. I think it might be a solution to a complex problem of optimization. Such problems arise, for example, when two or more factors are important, but none cannot be maximized without diminishing the others. A problem of this sort emerges, for example, because of the antipathy between cooperation and competition, both of which are socially and psychologically desirable. Cooperation is for safety, security and companionship. Competition is for personal growth and status. However, if a given group is too small, it has no power or prestige, and cannot fend off other groups. In consequence, being one of its members is not that useful. If the group is too large, however, the probability of climbing near or to the top declines. So, it becomes too hard to get ahead. Perhaps people identify with groups at the flip of a coin because they deeply want to organize themselves, protect themselves, and still have some reasonable probability of climbing the dominance hierarchy. Then they favour their own group, because favouring it helps it thrive—and climbing something that is failing is not a useful strategy.

www.simplypsychology.org/social-identity-theory.html

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Sunday, January 21, 2018 8:35 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


That's a pretty interesting study.

I'm pretty much a lone wolf, now more than ever since I've set myself up to be beholden to nobody. I wouldn't call myself anti-social. I just really don't enjoy the company of others very much. I'm able to deal with it when I need to though. People at work seem to like me well enough.

In the past I've bonded with my co-workers and gone out of my way to fight for them when they weren't in a position to fight for themselves. That's just stupid though. Making a name for yourself for creating waves isn't a good thing, especially in this economy. Occasionally I've spoken up at my new employer now that I've got a history of proving my own worth, but it's only when it benefits me.

We're all on our own in the end.


I remember a coin my Grandpa used to have that he showed me once when I was a kid. It said "When you have a buddy, a buddy good and true... You'd better fuck him, before he fucks you."

Words to live by, those...

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Sunday, January 21, 2018 8:58 AM

JEWELSTAITEFAN


You guys are a barrel of laughs in this thread.

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Sunday, January 21, 2018 10:40 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


I'll admit that it's not as funny when you grow up and realize it's true, but my Grandpa's coin made me laugh when I was a kid and saw it.




Make me laugh, JSF.

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Monday, January 22, 2018 3:16 AM

OONJERAH



6IX: "When you have a buddy, a buddy good and true...
    You'd better fuck him, before he fucks you."

  That sucks. It says loyalty is foolish.

Hmmm. Or maybe it means, I was taught
  never to trust anyone ... and I learned it well.


Yuck-ptoooie! Outa here!
... oooOO}{OOooo ...

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Monday, January 22, 2018 7:10 AM

SECOND

The Joss Whedon script for Serenity, where Wash lives, is Serenity-190pages.pdf at https://www.mediafire.com/two


Quote:

Originally posted by 6IXSTRINGJACK:
I'll admit that it's not as funny when you grow up and realize it's true, but my Grandpa's coin made me laugh when I was a kid and saw it.

This ends with a Simpson’s joke:

Before you help someone, you should find out why that person is in trouble. You shouldn’t merely assume that he or she is a noble victim of unjust circumstances and exploitation. It’s the most unlikely explanation, not the most probable. In my experience—clinical and otherwise—it’s just never been that simple. Besides, if you buy the story that everything terrible just happened on its own, with no personal responsibility on the part of the victim, you deny that person all agency in the past (and, by implication, in the present and future, as well). In this manner, you strip him or her of all power.

It is far more likely that a given individual has just decided to reject the path upward, because of its difficulty. Perhaps that should even be your default assumption, when faced with such a situation. That’s too harsh, you think. You might be right. Maybe that’s a step too far. But consider this: failure is easy to understand. No explanation for its existence is required. In the same manner, fear, hatred, addiction, promiscuity, betrayal and deception require no explanation. It’s not the existence of vice, or the indulgence in it, that requires explanation. Vice is easy. Failure is easy, too. It’s easier not to shoulder a burden. It’s easier not to think, and not to do, and not to care. It’s easier to put off until tomorrow what needs to be done today, and drown the upcoming months and years in today’s cheap pleasures. As the infamous father of the Simpson clan puts it, immediately prior to downing a jar of mayonnaise and vodka, “That’s a problem for Future Homer. Man, I don’t envy that guy!”

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Monday, January 22, 2018 7:48 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Quote:

Originally posted by Oonjerah:

6IX: "When you have a buddy, a buddy good and true...
    You'd better fuck him, before he fucks you."

  That sucks. It says loyalty is foolish.

Hmmm. Or maybe it means, I was taught
  never to trust anyone ... and I learned it well.



I think loyalty is foolish, but I'm sure that's not objectivity speaking. Your mileage may vary.

I wasn't ever taught not to trust anyone. It was a learned behavior.

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Monday, January 22, 2018 12:39 PM

1KIKI

Goodbye, kind world (George Monbiot) - In common with all those generations which have contemplated catastrophe, we appear to be incapable of understanding what confronts us.


Quote:

Originally posted by second:
This ends with a Simpson’s joke:

Before you help someone, you should find out why that person is in trouble. You shouldn’t merely assume that he or she is a noble victim of unjust circumstances and exploitation. It’s the most unlikely explanation, not the most probable. In my experience—clinical and otherwise—it’s just never been that simple. Besides, if you buy the story that everything terrible just happened on its own, with no personal responsibility on the part of the victim, you deny that person all agency in the past (and, by implication, in the present and future, as well). In this manner, you strip him or her of all power.

It is far more likely that a given individual has just decided to reject the path upward, because of its difficulty. Perhaps that should even be your default assumption, when faced with such a situation. That’s too harsh, you think. You might be right. Maybe that’s a step too far. But consider this: failure is easy to understand. No explanation for its existence is required. In the same manner, fear, hatred, addiction, promiscuity, betrayal and deception require no explanation. It’s not the existence of vice, or the indulgence in it, that requires explanation. Vice is easy. Failure is easy, too. It’s easier not to shoulder a burden. It’s easier not to think, and not to do, and not to care. It’s easier to put off until tomorrow what needs to be done today, and drown the upcoming months and years in today’s cheap pleasures. As the infamous father of the Simpson clan puts it, immediately prior to downing a jar of mayonnaise and vodka, “That’s a problem for Future Homer. Man, I don’t envy that guy!”

Says the person born with a silver spoon in its mouth.

You have no concept what it means to be born poor. To be exposed to lead, and maybe drugs before you're even born. To live life under stress and high levels of brain-destroying cortisol. To go to crappy schools where you might get shot on the way, or beaten up when you get there. To have teachers overwhelmed by simply trying to bring calm to a class of too many. To have no help and have to either get life-crushing student-loan debt or work full time and spend years trying to get through school. And then - FINALLY - after you've become one of the few to overcome decades of obstacles through unrelenting work and sheer luck, and you've finally 'made it' - to be far less rewarded for your abilities, training, and work, than white males.

Nope. In your puny understanding of the world, people deserve to be where they are because they're just lazy.




HAS IT NOT OCCURRED TO YOU BY NOW THAT IF YOU HAVE TO RESORT TO LOGICAL FALLACIES AND TROLLING YOUR SO-CALLED ARGUMENTS ARE LIES?

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Monday, January 22, 2018 5:46 PM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Quote:

Originally posted by 1kiki:

You have no concept what it means to be born poor. To be exposed to lead, and maybe drugs before you're even born. To live life under stress and high levels of brain-destroying cortisol. To go to crappy schools where you might get shot on the way, or beaten up when you get there. To have teachers overwhelmed by simply trying to bring calm to a class of too many. To have no help and have to either get life-crushing student-loan debt or work full time and spend years trying to get through school. And then - FINALLY - after you've become one of the few to overcome decades of obstacles through unrelenting work and sheer luck, and you've finally 'made it' - to be far less rewarded for your abilities, training, and work, than white males.



I'm assuming you only mean the well off white males that didn't have any of those problems or obstacles themselves growing up. Right Kiki?

Right, Kiki?

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Monday, January 22, 2018 6:13 PM

WHOZIT


Q: How do you get 50 Teamsters into a shoebox?

A: Tell them it's a break room.

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Monday, January 22, 2018 7:09 PM

1KIKI

Goodbye, kind world (George Monbiot) - In common with all those generations which have contemplated catastrophe, we appear to be incapable of understanding what confronts us.


Quote:

Originally posted by 6IXSTRINGJACK:

I'm assuming you only mean the well off white males that didn't have any of those problems or obstacles themselves growing up. Right Kiki?

Right, Kiki?

Actually - no I don't. At every level of education and experience, white males are more rewarded than everyone else.

ETA: but yanno jack, in this place nobody gets what they 'deserve'. People who work, don't get the value of what they produce. People who own the means of production, get far more than the value of what they make. There is certainly not enough jobs for the people who can work, despite the fact that there's a mountain of things need doing. And the people who are kind of slow, or disabled, or old, or sick ... well, what would you do with them?
This place is chock full of inhumanity, and unfairness.
There's no need to quibble over the title 'most victimized'.




HAS IT NOT OCCURRED TO YOU BY NOW THAT IF YOU HAVE TO RESORT TO LOGICAL FALLACIES AND TROLLING YOUR SO-CALLED ARGUMENTS ARE LIES?

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Monday, January 22, 2018 8:40 PM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Quote:

Originally posted by 1kiki:

There's no need to quibble over the title 'most victimized'.



Yet you do all the time. And others do it as well. And it's always white males that are to blame and always have it better in any given circumstances.

Take your own advice and I won't talk about it anymore. Until then, every time you bring it up I'm going to call your bullshit.

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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Wednesday, February 14, 2018 1:43 AM

1KIKI

Goodbye, kind world (George Monbiot) - In common with all those generations which have contemplated catastrophe, we appear to be incapable of understanding what confronts us.


Sorry you can't deal with facts.




HAS IT NOT OCCURRED TO YOU BY NOW THAT IF YOU HAVE TO RESORT TO LOGICAL FALLACIES AND TROLLING YOUR SO-CALLED ARGUMENTS ARE LIES?

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Wednesday, February 14, 2018 9:00 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Oh... good comeback Keeks. And it only took you a month to do it.

What's with you and Wishy doing that all the time now?

Do Right, Be Right. :)

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