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When you are talking to somebody, do you look that person in the eye the whole time?

It is a big thing in America that people look each other in the eye when having a discussion. According to Americans, if you look away when talking to somebody, they believe you have something to hide. What do you think about this premise?

I agree, Americans make such a big deal about looking somebody in the eye that you're talking to.

The Japanese on the other hand consider looking somebody in the eye as very disrespectful, especially if the person you're talking to is your superior. I think Nigerians are the same way.

So, what obtains in America is more of a culture than anything else. As far as I'm concerned, not looking somebody in the eye while you speak to them is not a sign that you have something to hide.

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It's a form of nonverbal communication known as oculesics and has a large influence on social behavior.

A myth; you can't trust someone who won't look you in the eye. Or, if someone's eyes dart to many things in the room while you're talking with them they're "shifty-eyed" or shy.

According to Wikipedia, a Canadian study with 3- to 6- month-old infants found that smiling in the infants decreased when adult eye contact was removed. A British study found that direct gaze facilitated face recognition by infants. Other research confirmed the belief that the direct gaze of adults influences the direct gaze of infants.

Sadly, some adults avoid eye contact because of early childhood wounding. Researchers who study relationships find there is a big difference between people who make friends easily and those who don't. Generally, people in successful relationships tend to make frequent eye contact when conversing.

Eye aversion can be a positive thing when a cognitive task is at hand. Apparently, looking someone in the eye requires mental processing that could be distracting when trying to respond to questions on a test or concentrating on an activity.

However, we often look for clues in the eyes of people with whom we communicate. We want to know if we're accepted. People tend to make less eye contact with individuals they dislike.

Maintaining constant eye contact is virtually impossible, arouses strong emotion, and can be stressful. Eye contact between two people rarely lasts longer than three seconds before one or both participants has a strong urge to look away.

When it comes to eye contact with animals - watch out. Eye aversion is strongly recommended. Direct eye contact in most species is seen as aggressive and threatening.

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In the Islamic faith, Muslims often lower their gaze and try not to focus on the opposite sex's faces and eyes after the initial first eye contact, other than their legitimate partners or family members, in order to avoid potential unwanted desires.

In many cultures, such as East Asia and Nigeria, it is respectful not to look the dominant person in the eye; references such as "shifty-eyed" can refer to suspicions regarding an individual's unrevealed intentions or thoughts.

Nevertheless, the seeking of constant unbroken eye contact by the other participant in a conversation can often be considered overbearing or distracting by many even in western cultures, possibly on an instinctive or subconscious level.

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"Looking at faces is quite mentally demanding. We get useful information from the face when listening to someone, but human faces are very stimulating and all this takes processing. So when we are trying to concentrate and process something else that's mentally demanding, it's unhelpful to look at faces."

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Hippie Operative Nikovich Nikita Nicovna Talibani,
signing off