XANDER FEVER by chrisisall

If anyone wants to post stuff I'm not up to, I'll just read the episode title first, if I haven't seen it yet, I'll just skip it, no need to censor.

I'll get there eventually Chrisisall

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Thursday, June 9, 2005 1:34 PM

SIGMANUNKI

Willow is my fav but Xander is great too.

My fav Xander scene is his rant after being released from Dracula's hold, LOL, it's great

The butt-monkey remark is the reason why I've named my server Xander

----
"Canada being mad at you is like Mr. Rogers throwing a brick through your window." -Jon Stewart, The Daily Show

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Thursday, June 9, 2005 3:51 PM

BIKISDAD

OK, there are two that I can think of immediately from S4 that I love:

One is (I think) from "The Freshman", although I'm not absolutely sure about that. Xander is trying to cheer Buffy up and he tries to give her an inspirational speech (I think from one of the Star Wars movies). Unfortunately, he mangles it badly and it comes out word salad. Buffy tells him, "Thanks for the Dada-ist pep talk. I feel much more abstract now."

Another one is from "Something Blue". Xander is completely flabbergasted about something going on within the gang. He comes into the room and exclaims, "What?!... How?!...What?!" Giles replies, "Three very good questions." That one's not as funny in writing because a lot of it is the visual of Xander's perplexed face.

EDIT: One of my favorites that you've already seen in S1 was when he told Jenny Calendar, "To read makes our speaking English good." That one and "Come to my house for dinner. My Mom's making her famous phone call to the Chinese place."

Apathy on the Rise. No One Cares.

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Monday, June 20, 2005 9:55 AM

BADNLATIN

I think its crap how they cut Xanders screentime to NOTHINGNESS in Season 7, idiots.

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Monday, June 20, 2005 9:59 AM

ZOOT

Quote:
Originally posted by badnlatin:
I think its crap how they cut Xanders screentime to NOTHINGNESS in Season 7, idiots.

I hear ya! Dupes! Fools!!

***************************************

Okay, I'm lost, I'm angry, and I'm
armed.

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Tuesday, July 5, 2005 4:58 PM

MER

Wow, where to start? So many Xanderisms make me giggle with glee.

Hmm...this is going to boggle me a great amount. So I'll say, all of the jokes he makes. Especially butt-monkey ^-^

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Thursday, July 28, 2005 1:08 PM

What do you think was Xander's funniest season, I mean the one where he got the most screen time, and was also at his At his zaniest?

Zeppo Chrisisall

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Thursday, July 28, 2005 1:10 PM

BATMARLOWE

Probably 3, wouldn't you think?

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Thursday, July 28, 2005 2:22 PM

DROCCULARI

Season two, Innocence. Looked it up on IMDB to get it right:

Cordelia: So does looking at guns make you wanna have sex?
Xander: I'm 17. Looking at linoleum makes me wanna have sex.

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Thursday, July 28, 2005 2:39 PM

I think it's maybe a tie between 2 and 3...
But then 3 had The Zeppo...that one ep counted for like 4 regular eps.
Leanin' towards 3.

Linoleum lovin' Chrisisall

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Thursday, July 28, 2005 3:11 PM

MER

*Twitching each time Faith's name was mentioned in "Bad Girls"
*Dracula- all Xander parts...talking of Draci, eatring bugs, and the butt monkey rant.
*Hynea episode (lol not the traditional Xan, but oh my god he was so hot in it)

So far that's all I can come up with.

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Friday, July 29, 2005 12:39 AM

S2 was his best I think. There are more S3 eps where he isn't integral to the plot.

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Friday, July 29, 2005 1:04 AM

LIZANNE

For some reason passing explination my favorite Xander moment is from Dopplegangland.

Buffy, Xander, and Giles are in the library upset over Willow being a "vampire" when all of a sudden she walks in the door. Xander jumps up with a cross and shoves it in her face.

When the cross doesn't work, he looks at it funny... shakes it and then shoves it back in her face.

I'm giggling just thinking about it. Funny funny scene.

Liz
Nathan sat next to me.

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Friday, July 29, 2005 1:08 AM

ANYA: I know you like me Xander. I saw you looking at my breasts!
XANDER: Anya, no offence, but when a guy looks at your breasts it just means his eyes are open.

The
Somnambulist

www.cirqus.com

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Friday, July 29, 2005 7:23 AM

FRAY101

Ah, how I love Xander. I reckon I've only been disappointed with him once (you're a long way from that Chrisisall) but I soon forgave him.

A while back I made a load of Buffy/Angel/Firefly wallpapers based on the "Sin City" posters and needed to find a quote for each character. When I saw this thread it made me think, which hilarious Xander quote did I use? So I've just checked and found I actually used a poignant one instead! It's from Season 6, for Chrisisall's sake:

Select to view spoiler:

You wanna kill the world, you start with me. I've earned that.

Never get tired of "What's a BITCA?" though...

(The pictures are here if anyone's curious: http://www.destinything.com/id130.html)
_____________________________________

Visit the Browncoats' Photo 'Verse at http://disneypix.tripod.com/photoverse

Over 100 Serenity screencaps now available at www.destinything.com.

www.cafepress.com/fireflyclass
www.cafepress.com/destiny2 (Wonderfalls)

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Friday, July 29, 2005 7:43 AM

Had a look at your stuff Fray 101. Nice work!!!

I really like the Doyle one. Those colours work very well.

The
Somnambulist

www.cirqus.com

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Friday, July 29, 2005 7:55 AM

CALLMESERENITY

Quote:
Originally posted by Lizanne:
For some reason passing explination my favorite Xander moment is from Dopplegangland.

Buffy, Xander, and Giles are in the library upset over Willow being a "vampire" when all of a sudden she walks in the door. Xander jumps up with a cross and shoves it in her face.

When the cross doesn't work, he looks at it funny... shakes it and then shoves it back in her face.

I'm giggling just thinking about it. Funny funny scene.

Liz
Nathan sat next to me.

Me, too Liz. I was laughing just reading your description of the scene.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

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Friday, July 29, 2005 8:56 AM

FRAY101

Quote:
Originally posted by CallMeSerenity:
Quote:
Originally posted by Lizanne:
For some reason passing explination my favorite Xander moment is from Dopplegangland.

Buffy, Xander, and Giles are in the library upset over Willow being a "vampire" when all of a sudden she walks in the door. Xander jumps up with a cross and shoves it in her face.

When the cross doesn't work, he looks at it funny... shakes it and then shoves it back in her face.

I'm giggling just thinking about it. Funny funny scene.

Me, too Liz. I was laughing just reading your description of the scene.

Serenity, First Officer of Destiny

Ooh yes, another brilliant one! (There are so many - see, how did I end up choosing a serious quote?). There's a similar bit in the Presentation Episode where Willow & Xander are sneaking around with a cross and Willow goes "Freeze! I know how to use this...I think."

And thanks Ric!

_____________________________________

Visit the Browncoats' Photo 'Verse at http://disneypix.tripod.com/photoverse

Over 100 Serenity screencaps now available at www.destinything.com.

www.cafepress.com/fireflyclass
www.cafepress.com/destiny2 (Wonderfalls)

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Friday, July 29, 2005 9:56 AM

EMBERS

Quote:
Originally posted by chrisisall:
Xander is my favourite character. What's his funniest line/scene?

The Xan-man is always great with the funny...
but I love him the best when he is serious.
Nick Brendon does a brilliant job with the heart felt rants:
why Buffy should go after Riley,
telling Anya he loves her for the first time,
telling Dawn why their role is the hardest...
oops, sorry...that last one is a spoiler for Season 7...but that is my point:
Xander is recognized as the heart of the group in the Super combo Buffy at the end of Season 4,
but he never gives up that role...
no other character could have done what he did at the end of Season 6!
(see? I AM trying to avoid actual spoilers)

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Wednesday, September 21, 2005 6:17 AM

DRAVEN

Best moment: Snoopy Dance

Select to view spoiler:

ScruffyXANDER: Don't be scared, Will. Just listen. It's me, Xander.
[Willow puts her books on the bed, looking confused.]

ScruffyXANDER: And I can prove it.

WILLOW: Um ... okay. [Sits on the bed]

ScruffyXANDER: Let's see. [paces] Stuff only you and me know. Okay! On my seventh birthday ... I wanted a toy fire truck, and I didn't get it, and you were real nice about it, and then the house next door burnt down, and then real fire trucks came, and for years I thought you set the fire for me. And if you did, you can tell me. [grins nervously. Willow doesn't respond. He paces more.] For a while last year, I thought I was lactose-intolerant, but it was just some bad Brie. Oh! [points at Willow] Every Christmas, we watch Charlie Brown together, and I do the Snoopy dance.
[He begins to do the Snoopy dance, wearing a big grin. Willow watches for a moment and then gets up. ]

WILLOW: (smiling) Xander ... stop dancing.

ScruffyXANDER: Aha! You called me Xander!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"One more anal-probing gyro-pyro levitating ectoplasm alien anti-matter story and I'm going to take out my gun and shoot somebody."
- Fox Mulder "The X-Files"

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Wednesday, September 21, 2005 12:57 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by MER:

*Dracula- all Xander parts...talking of Draci, eatring bugs, and the butt monkey rant.

Now I know what you're talkin' about- I agree!!!!

ChrisisallXandered

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Tuesday, October 25, 2005 8:05 PM

Oh dear, I think I'm going to do a troll...

***BIG BRIGHT FLASHING TROLL WARNING***

I don't like Xander. He has his moments, but from the very first moment I disliked him. We see him skateboard into something -not impressive- then after ogling Buffy he speaks to Willow *specifically* because he wants her help with his schoolwork.

He obsesses over Buffy.
He hates Angel when he doesn't deserve it, then goes around being proud of that fact when suddenly Angelus does.
He is an absolute asshole to Spike...this is how he behaves to the only person who is below him on the totem pole.
He dumps Anya at the altar (complete asshole).
He is nasty to Buffy after the reveal in Apathy.
He is so very pathetic through it all...dumb, awkward, and useless.

...And the bitch doesn't even compensate by being pretty.

*************************/TROLL***********************

Ummm... the linoleum line was good...

---------------------------------------------------
Early: Where'd she go?

Simon: I can't keep track of her when she's NOT incorporeally possessing a spaceship, don't look at me --

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 1:30 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:
He obsesses over Buffy.

And who can blame him?

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:

He hates Angel when he doesn't deserve it, then goes around being proud of that fact when suddenly Angelus does.

He's a 16 year old boy and you're begrudging him a little jealousy?

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:

He is an absolute asshole to Spike...this is how he behaves to the only person who is below him on the totem pole.

Why should he treat Spike well?

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:

He dumps Anya at the altar (complete asshole).

...because he thinks marrying her is going to wreck both their futures. Kinda noble IMO.

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:

He is nasty to Buffy after the reveal in Apathy.

Um there is no episode called Apathy...

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:

He is so very pathetic through it all...dumb, awkward, and useless.

He's the comic relief - he's supposed to be awkward! Dumb and useless? Well he does bring Buffy back to life and save the world a couple of times, but I suppose he shouldn't get credit for that cause he dislikes Angel so much...

Having said all that, he doesn't get a hell of a lot to do for the last three years : (

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 1:49 AM

VisitingMyIntentions wrote:

Quote:
He obsesses over Buffy.

As Buffy obsessed over Angel

Quote:
He hates Angel when he doesn't deserve it, then goes around being proud of that fact when suddenly Angelus does.

You are kidding right? Angel... The vampire !!!! Of course he deserves to be hated!!!!

Quote:
He is an absolute asshole to Spike...this is how he behaves to the only person who is below him on the totem pole.

Because Spike is a MURDERING VAMPIRE!!!!!! who kills, and kills, and kills... oh and tries to rape Buffy, Xanders best friend....

Quote:
He dumps Anya at the altar (complete asshole).

While not very noble I grant you Anya was a DEMON for a thousand years, she should be able to handle a regection at the altar. "Hey what goes around comes around right"

Quote:
He is nasty to Buffy after the reveal in Apathy.

Not sure which episode this is... But lets face it Buffy had her moments when everyone had a right to be 'nasty' to her.

Quote:
He is so very pathetic through it all...dumb, awkward, and useless.

Er teenager....Then when an adult saved the world.

Quote:
...And the bitch doesn't even compensate by being pretty.

Ahhh the true intent into your hatred. 'He be ugly so slay the wretch eh?' Don't forget he did bring Buffy back to life... Something her precious Angel couldn't do.

... D'you have any other reasons?

www.cirqus.com

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 7:16 AM

LUCKYSHADOW

I kind of have to agree with Visitingmyintentions on the not loving Xander thing. He does have great moments--some of my favourites, in fact--but I think the Angel and Anya things are unforgivable. I just re-watched Revelations, and he got Faith to try to kill Angel after he was good again. Fine, so he's a jealous teenage boy--but what gives him the right to KILL him behind Buffy's back? I don't like him making that kind of decision for her.

Anyway, sorry to be a bit of a troll, so here's some of my favourite Xander moments:

"Check, cancel spanking."

Anya: "Pervert."
Xander: "Other pervert."

"I'm thinking principal school. I wanna walk in your shoes. Not your actual shoes, 'cause you're a tiny person."

"These things are selling like hotcakes, which is ironic, 'cause the hotcakes really aren't moving."

All of The Zeppo and Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered.

And the scene where he re-enacts one of Buffy's vampire stakings using fish sticks--"Mother!"

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 9:31 AM

but,but.... Xander lost his best friend Jesse to vamps, so he's entitled to be a touch miffed at them. Plus if I may use an anaology here, if you'd been biten by a dog, however cute that dog may then go on to be, the next time you saw that dog you'd be wary. You wouldn't entirely trust that dog. It's only human instinct.

Likewise with Xander and vamps, and I must say the girl he had the hots for, favoured a dead guy over him!!! How would you feel!!! :)

Personally I think he does well not to dust 'em more readily.

It's only natural. Xanders character is the one of reason, in the show, the one that doesn't give in to the idea that some vamps are better than others, and he may have a point. Better they all get wasted and so problem solved.

The
Somnambulist

www.cirqus.com

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 10:23 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Grounded:

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:

He is nasty to Buffy after the reveal in Apathy.

Um there is no episode called Apathy...

urgh... I meant Entropy, sorry.

(...please tell me I got it right this time.)

I don't think he gets away with being unpleasantly irrational just because of his age or sex. And I think that he chose the worst possible time to break up with Anya (oh, except he wants to keep seeing her...). He had a long engagement period --during any of that time he could have spoken up. I don't think he deserves praise for not saying something until supernatural forces and impending marriage vows force him too.

And after all that he turns on Buffy for not telling him a secret he would react very badly to. He turns on Anya for having sex with someone else after he broke up with her and broke her heart, and then when he talks to both Buffy and Anya he gets angry at them, knowing how horrible he has acted.

Sorry, just not a Xander fan.
It's a matter of types of comic relief. The "he's incompetent, ha ha" type seems unkind at best, at worst it makes the character pathetic and unpleasant.

---------------------------------------------------
Early: Where'd she go?

Simon: I can't keep track of her when she's NOT incorporeally possessing a spaceship, don't look at me --

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 11:45 AM

I definitely agree they missed a few opportunities to have Xander's misdeeds come back to haunt him.

But on the altar-leaving issue, I can't quite understand how you can hate Xander for that. Maybe you need to rewatch Hell's Bells...not that I'll be doing that of course. Bloody awful episode...

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 5:09 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Grounded:
I definitely agree they missed a few opportunities to have Xander's misdeeds come back to haunt him.

But on the altar-leaving issue, I can't quite understand how you can hate Xander for that. Maybe you need to rewatch Hell's Bells...not that I'll be doing that of course. Bloody awful episode...

I just did. That's what spurred me to butt into this thread. The end of season six (well, season six in general) is not very kind to Xander. Starting with Hell's Bells, it's nothing but unpleasantness until he saves the world. He should hang out with Willow more. She brings out the good in him.

Hell's Bells made me angry at Xander, Maybe you need to rewatch Hell's Bells (it's not /that/ bad an episode, just not a very good one). In it we can certainly understand his leaving if false prophecies scared him, but I'm with Anya on the incomprehension to how he could act that way with knowledge of what was real and what wasn't. I don't understand how he could be so cruel and cowardly, choosing right then to back out, kicking Anya in the puppies.

---------------------------------------------------
Early: Where'd she go?

Simon: I can't keep track of her when she's NOT incorporeally possessing a spaceship, don't look at me --

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 7:56 PM

LIMINALOSITY

Love Zander. He's completely loyal with his disloyalty and jealousy, and his Zepponess.

Am I understanding that you've only watched up to the first bitty of season 4? Then you have yet to see many eps with Zander at his most awsome.

I don't have so many favorite Zander single lines as whole Zander vignettes and scenes, because he's so good with the physical comedy:

I love Zander as Bad Zander in the season 3 Bad Willow triptych. In particular the shaking of the cross in Doppelgangland, and the bit where he asks Bad Willow how bad he is in her reality. Love the way he says -oh yeah, I'm bad-. And in her reality, he is icy cold.

If you've seen the Buffy v Drac ep, his speech at the end of that ep is something I go to find just for a good laugh once in a while. And the spider eating. I love the originals of the genre, and Zander does a really good twisted Lugosi in this ep.

I cannot remember the title of the episode when...spoil alert...future ep...Zander and Anya are arguing about their relationship while he's driving the icecream truck. That whole scene just cracks me up, with the bug fan magazine on the dashboard. Then the dream sequence in a later ep when he's crawling through something very like that scene is a great flashback.

The Riley speach to Buffy, yeah. The Snoopy Dance. The hospital moment with Wil. The Us speech to Dawn.

Changing things by gettin' all bendy

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Wednesday, October 26, 2005 8:22 PM

SMOKE

Spike is the best.

Smoke em if you got em.

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Thursday, October 27, 2005 1:27 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:
In it we can certainly understand his leaving if false prophecies scared him, but I'm with Anya on the incomprehension to how he could act that way with knowledge of what was real and what wasn't. I don't understand how he could be so cruel and cowardly, choosing right then to back out, kicking Anya in the puppies.

Because, even if it isn't a certainty, he's seen a possible future in which getting married ruins their lives and he doesn't think he can take that risk?

Maybe I'm forgetting certain lines or scenes...but there's no way I'm willingly watching that ep again to check ;)

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Thursday, October 27, 2005 3:22 PM

Quote:
Because, even if it isn't a certainty, he's seen a possible future in which getting married ruins their lives and he doesn't think he can take that risk?

Maybe I'm forgetting certain lines or scenes...but there's no way I'm willingly watching that ep again to check ;)

Coward.

Everyone takes that risk in getting married. ...Amazing how so many people manage not to leave their spouse-to-be at the altar! And that's a risk Xander knew about since he first considered marriage. If he was going to back out, the day of the wedding is better than the day after the wedding, but not by much. It's cold and cowardly.

---------------------------------------------------
Early: Where'd she go?

Simon: I can't keep track of her when she's NOT incorporeally possessing a spaceship, don't look at me --

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Sunday, October 30, 2005 10:32 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by VisitingMyIntentions:
Coward.

Everyone takes that risk in getting married. ...Amazing how so many people manage not to leave their spouse-to-be at the altar! And that's a risk Xander knew about since he first considered marriage. If he was going to back out, the day of the wedding is better than the day after the wedding, but not by much. It's cold and cowardly.

It would be a lot more cowardly to simply go through with the wedding not to upset people.

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Sunday, October 30, 2005 9:59 PM

BATMARLOWE

Yeah, I hate it too. It's way down my list of BUFFY episodes. About the only things that work are the humorous things in the beginning about the bridesmaid's gowns, Anya's vows, and the moments Xander has with Willow and Buffy before the episode plummets into infuriating bullshit.

But that's just my opinion.

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Monday, October 31, 2005 12:45 AM

*high fives Batmarlowe*

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Monday, October 31, 2005 7:27 AM

LUCKYSHADOW

I like the way Dawn reacts to Spike's date at the wedding. She gives her this little 'thumbs up' that is the funniest thing she ever does.

Then tells Buffy:"He's like totally macking with her in the middle of the room. I saw him shove his tongue--"

I also liked seeing SMG juggle oranges. Very talented girl.

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Monday, October 31, 2005 7:41 AM

HAIDON

/sheepishly posts on-topic.

My favorite Xander line:

(After Willow tells him she won't go to the dance with him.)

"That's ok, I didn't want to go. I'll just go home, lie down, and listen to country music... The music of pain."

now back to your "Hells Bells" bashing; not that it isn't warranted /nod.

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Monday, October 31, 2005 9:20 AM