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The ski-masked creator of the satirical Twittter account @BPGlobalPR provided the comic highlight of the TEDx OilSpill conference on Monday, prancing around the stage and reeling off one fake BP company slogan after another.

A New Orleans, Louisiana, environmental activist provided one of the saddest moments when she recalled losing the most important person in her life at 17 when her father was one of 91 men who died in an oil drilling accident off Thailand.

And a conservationist provided one of the most powerful moments when he drew a connection between government regulators failing to require safer drilling practices to decades of deregulation.

Carl Safina of the Blue Ocean Institute said, "The oil blowout, the bank bailout, mortgage crisis, all these things are absolutely symptoms of same issue ... we still need police to protect us from a few bad people ... for the last 30 years, we've had a culture of deregulation caused directly by people we need to be protected from buying the government out from under us."

He was called back on stage to take a bow.

What we can see -- stained beaches and boats, dizzying patterns of iridescent sheens on the Gulf's surface, birds drenched in petroleum, miles of boom, some of it hopelessly tangled or unable to prevent oil from drifting into vital marshland.

And what we mostly cannot see -- beneath the surface, huge quantities of oil and chemical dispersant that, speakers said, threaten to dramatically harm the undersea world.

Along with the news that the X Prize foundation would offer a multimillion dollar award for a solution to cleaning up the oil disaster, the speakers shared devastating portraits of the risks and damage as well as hope for the long-term survival of the Gulf.

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Hippie Operative Nikovich Nikita Nicovna Talibani,
signing off

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I used to have to kick a sandcastle to ruin a child’s day. Now I just throw a match at it. That's progress. ^Tony

We've sent a free $200 whores gift basket to our workers on the beach in lieu of respirators. Tony

Anyone accusing us of tarring and feathering pelicans is ignorant. They feathered themselves. Tony

Now that the USA is out of the World Cup, I won't be worrying about them anymore. ^Tony

They want us to give our employees respirators. We want them to shut up. Sign the petition. Tony

One of our robots knocked the cap off the well. Don't worry, he's grounded for 2 weeks w/ no allowance. Tony

Respect BP wording procedure when filling out claims. Do not write "F%*# you crooks" or "like the ejaculate of Beelzebub." Tony

Cleaning up oil spills is expensive. Buying judges so we can keep drilling? Relatively cheap. Tony

We have begun the process of collecting our crude oil in biodegradable spill-proof containers: pelicans. Tony

Now that we're done testifying before Congress, it's fairly safe to say the worst part of this is over. Tony

Found the Deepwater Horizon Safety Manual in a stack of old Maxim mags. Lost it again looking at hometown hotties. Tony

Watch the hearing live at http://dailykos.com/ - Try and count how many times I roll my eyes on camera! ^Tony

Watch the hearing live at http://dailykos.com/ - Try and count how many times I roll my eyes on camera! ^Tony

Seeing how a lot of these Congressmen believe the oil we spilled was only 5000 years old, I should be just fine. ^Tony

And others:

Yes! SeanHannity doesn't blame us! We'd hire him, but the feds say we've got one too many gaping holes spewing garbage.

In Space, nobody can hear you scream. So quit hollering and taking pictures you stupid astronauts!

Keep in mind, the more your interest in the oil spill wanes, the less damage the oil does

The only harmful chemicals in our dispersant are the ones you inhale, silly

No more offshore drilling? Fine. We'll make our own shores, just like we make our own rules. http://ow.ly/22L9f #bpcares
1,277,404,291,000.00 via TweetDeck

It's raining oil! We shot our guns into the air to celebrate, but had to quit after we blew up a cloud.

We are not killing animals in the gulf, we are creating fossils in the gulf. Have a little perspective!

MMS approved 13 new BP deepwater wells! We'll be sending a really nice cocaine and whores gift basket.

Yes, our "spill" is a "trickle" and "hurricanes" are "drizzles". Hope it doesn't "drizzle" on our "trickle". That'd be a "pickle".

Wait, Oil PLUMES? We thought you asked about oil PLUMS in the ocean. How silly!

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