AUTHOR’S NOTES:

This is my first crossover fan fiction. I wanted to branch out a little from my usual horror and comedy stories, and tackle something more general. The following story combines the Doctor Who and Firefly worlds respectively.

The idea came to me when the second season of Doctor Who was about to air in the U.K. I enjoyed the new series of Who, and was desperate to write a story with these characters. I imagined what it would be like for my two favourite shows to come together.

Initially, I’d written most of this story using Christopher Eccleston’s performance, although after watching season two, I adjusted it to David Tennant. The story could work with both characters, although I really like the tone of the second year.

The first chapter has been a blast to write. I have an organic approach to writing stories. It’s been so much fun figuring out the overall tone, and imagining the characters from two different fandom’s interact .

***

“Stolen? What do you mean stolen? Define ‘stolen’.” The Doctor cried. Rose Tyler looked nervously at her feet. They had been arguing for the last three minutes, to the bemusement of the local colour. The Doctor glared at the blonde haired girl before him. “Well?” Rose struggled to find the right words, or any for that matter. Her gaze lingered awkwardly to the right, watching the expressions of two old Chinese men drawn to the ruckus. “It’s not there.” she muttered. “It’s just… Not there.” “I can see that!” the Doctor boomed, gesturing to her pockets. “What are we going to do about it?” Rose’s eyes widened. She was beginning to lose patience herself. “I don’t know, do I?!” she paused, collecting her thoughts. “Anyway, he couldn’t have gone far.” The Doctor drew a hand through his hair and sighed. The conversation was not easing his temper. It was hardly the most favourable of situations, considering their location. Their latest trip was supposed to be a relaxing wander through time, far from werewolves and the stern gaze of Victorian Britain. “We’re barely five minutes out of the TARDIS, and we get targeted by pickpockets. We’re completely stranded here, you do realise that?!” The Doctor stressed Rose raised her eyebrows. The Doctor overreacted sometimes, more often than her best mate Shereen. “Alright, calm down. It was just a key.” she replied. The Doctor swung around. “It’s not just a key. It’s the only key that we have, and if someone gains access to the TARDIS, they could alter time with drastic consequences.” Rose’s jaw dropped. She was beginning to regret setting foot on this planet, and with a fiery passion. “You mean that you don’t have a spare one?” The Doctor stared back at Rose, reluctant to confirm or deny that fact. Although, he knew that he couldn’t keep anything from his human friend for much longer. Rose clutched her forehead with one hand. The Doctor’s silence spoke volumes. It had to be the worst day of her life. A flurry of desperate thoughts ran through her head. There had to be something that they could do. Rose watched as the Doctor paced back and forth. She had never seen him so worried. Her own temper subsided, as she cast her mind back to the incident. “I wasn’t the only one standing next to him.” she noted. “Check your pockets. He could’ve taken something from both of us.” The Doctor’s eyes bulged out of his face. The very notion that someone could steal something from under his very nose, and without his knowledge, tickled him. “Oh, there’s no way that could ever happen.” he mused. “ I can see that sort of thing from a billion miles away. Well. I say a billion miles, but it’s closer to a trillion.” Rose pulled a sarcastic smile. The Time Lord’s arrogance wasn’t helping the situation, or her current mood. “Yeah right. Why won’t you check them?” The Doctor’s eyes grew serious, objecting to this sudden line of questioning. “There’s no need.” Rose pouted. In the short time that she had travelled with him, it was his stubborn nature that she had grown to dislike. . The Doctor sighed, sensing the young girl’s displeasure. It was clear that nothing could dissuade Rose Tyler, at least not on this occasion. “What’s taking you so long?” Rose said impatiently. Reluctantly, The Doctor reached into his pocket. “I really don’t see any point in doing this.” he muttered. His hands dipped in and out, checking every nook and cranny. The Doctor stopped, as a horrid realisation reared its ugly head. “It’s gone.” The words made Rose’s stomach churn. The situation was growing more uncomfortable by the second. “What is?” “The sonic screwdriver. It’s gone; disappeared, vanished, not there. Do I need to use any more adjectives?!” The Doctor spluttered. “You’re kidding?” Rose gasped. The Doctor slowly drew a hand down his face. “I’m speechless!” The words ran through his alien mind once more. “Oh dear, that’s a first. This has never happened to me before. I feel quite strange.” “Shouldn’t we call the local authorities or something?” Rose offered. The Doctor chuckled at the idea. “We can’t walk into the nearest police station, and say that we happened to lose the key to our time machine, now can we? No, we have to do this alone.” The cold, hard realism of their situation hit Rose like a hangover. “He was just a kid. I mean, how was I to know that he was a criminal?” “You’d be surprised, considering a place like this.” The Doctor muttered. Rose tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. She had endured enough stress for a decade. “We’ll find a way to get it back. We always do, yeah?” The Doctor scoffed. “That’s easy for you to say. Have you seen this place?!” He picked up an apple from a nearby stall and juggled it in one hand. “There’s nothing but market stalls and thousands upon thousands of people all converging into this single area. It would be like looking for a human inside a cyber. Or, a slitheen inside an abzorbaloff, whatever takes your fancy. My point is, that we aren’t exactly in the smallest place in the universe! And don’t get me started on the smell.” “There has to be someone that knows him.” Rose interrupted. “We should ask around.” The Doctor’s eyes lit up, drawn to something other than the conversation at hand. “Can you smell that? Oh that smells gorgeous!” Rose rolled her eyes disapprovingly. “This isn’t the time to be thinking about your stomach.” The Doctor motioned to a vendor that served roast meat. The food sizzled and spat on the open grill. He wrinkled his nose at the cardboard sign hanging from the stall. In hand written words, it claimed: ‘Good dogs’ “On second thoughts, never mind.” he said. Rose sharply pulled him away, and looked into his eyes. “Look. We need to get our things back, yeah? We can grab a bite to eat later.” The Doctor folded his arms across his chest. “I can’t take you anywhere can I?” he said wryly. “You’re absolutely right though. I suggest we both pick a direction and start looking.” Rose mirrored The Doctor’s stance and scanned the marketplace. “How can something so small cause so much trouble?” The Doctor smiled softly, recalling some distant memory from his travels. “It’s a possibility.” Rose sighed. There was no way of telling what ran through his mind. He was so erratic. It was amazing that she wanted to travel with him. Together, they had travelled to distant stars, through time and space. They had encountered new species and empires. She had saved his life on several occasions, and narrowly avoided death herself. It was ironic that a small kid could cause them so many problems. Rose continued to scan the crowd, in the hope of finding the little bandit. The afternoon sun hung low across the docks. A dry heat lingered in the air. The noise was indescribable. Out of nowhere, the notion of a Sliveen inside an Abzorbaloff, slipped into Rose’s mind. A faint smile tugged at her lips, and before long she found herself giggling. The Doctor looked on, puzzled by the sudden display of hysterics. “Is something funny?” “It’s nothing.” Rose said, collecting herself. “What did you say this place was called again?” “Persephone, named after the Greek goddess and daughter of Demeter. “The Doctor declared. Rose chuckled slightly. The level of knowledge that he imparted rolled straight off the tongue. It was a quality that she found both scary and impressive. “Right.” The Doctor frowned, bemused at the young girl’s tone. “I’m serious. The year is 2517, and this planet is part of the Anglo-Sino alliance. The last remaining superpowers in this time are China and the United States. All of the planets are under the same rule. This one is just outside the core system.” “So, we’re a long way from Earth then?” Rose asked, turning around. The Doctor uncrossed his arms, relinquishing the search. “Pretty much. You see the planet earth could no longer maintain the human population. Humanity pushed out further into space and colonised new worlds, this being one of them. It’s been that way for decades now. Of course, some people were against unification, and there was a bloody battle.” The Doctor paused, pondering his last words. “What is it about humans and violence, always going to war with each other?” “Rose’s eyes glazed over. “You know, I didn’t even want to come here in the first place.” The Doctor gasped, dumbfounded by such hypocrisy. It was standard procedure to let Rose pick the next destination. It was the very reason that they were standing here! “Yes, you did! You wanted to go someplace with a lot of culture and here we are.” The Doctor pointed to the surrounding crowd. “Lots of culture, see?” “I already hate it.” Rose muttered. Her eyes darted around the market place, nervous at the thought that someone may have overheard the comment. “We’re stuck here now, whether we like it or not.” The Doctor replied. “It’s not all bad. You should take in the sites and sample the delicacies!” Rose frowned. “But I thought that you were angry?” “Oh, I am.” The Doctor chirped. “There’s no point in feeling angry if we stand here all day, is there? I’m sure we’ll run into out little friend sooner or later. Let’s spread out and look around. I’ll go left, and you can go right. We’ll each take a section of the market, and meet back here in an hour.” Without hesitation, The Doctor quickly set off into the crowd, leaving a bemused Rose behind. “You’re not expecting me to wander around this place alone are you?!” Rose said moodily. “Don’t worry!” The Doctor called back. “This will be over with before you can say Raxacoricofallapatorious.” Rose let out a frustrated sigh. It was clear that she really had no choice in the matter. She turned to face the bustling crowd, and reluctantly began the search. The marketplace was a cornucopia of activity. People of all ethnicities roamed the streets. Rickshaws weaved in and out of the alleyways. Flying cars soared overhead, leaving black trails of engine smoke in their wake. It reminded Rose of early morning rush hour in London – without the science fiction. A sea of bodies loomed all around, dressed in all kinds of attire. The history of fashion was spread out before her. Rose’s gaze lowered, checking under the stalls, and anywhere that the pickpocket may hide from the unsuspecting public Suddenly, an old man yelled something in Egyptian, and threw up his arms in protest. A little boy ran out from behind a pile of birdcages, and made a break for the crowd ahead. Rose’s eyes lit up, recognising the pint sized bandit. “’Ere! Somebody stop him!” Rose yelled. A couple of heads turned briefly at the sound of her thick London accent. The kid continued to break through the crowd, diving under every available market stall. Rose let out a frustrated sigh. Even in the distant future, there was no one willing to lend a hand. She quickly set off into the crowd, keeping an eye on the pickpocket as he broke off to the right. Suddenly, Rose knocked into something firm. She stumbled awkwardly, and hit the ground backwards. From her dusty vantage point, she could see the child slip behind the cover of some freight containers. “Hey! You should look where you’re going!” she snapped. “Gorramit! It ain’t my fault!” came a voice. Rose glared at the figure on the ground alongside her. He was a large, muscular man with dark brown hair. Groggily, he clambered to his feet. Rose smiled, slightly attracted by his rugged good looks. “Is everything okay?” came a female voice. Awkwardly, Rose pulled herself up into a seated position. “Yeah, I’m fine. It’s just that he wasn’t looking where he was going. That’s all.” “Jian ta de gui.” the man snorted. Just then, the woman, dressed in leather trousers and a green shirt, loomed over Rose. She had a warm, friendly, and yet warrior like presence. Rose looked back with a wary eye, and realised that she was offering assistance “Thanks.” Rose said, taking a hold of the stranger’s hand. The rugged man stared at Rose, showing no attempt to hide his displeasure. The woman quickly turned to him, ignoring his foul mood. “We have to leave now. The Captain’s waiting for us.” Rose adjusted her top that had been unceremoniously creased during the fall. She caught the first half of the woman’s sentence, and started to panic. “Hang on! He didn’t apologise. It isn’t my fault!” she cried. “Sure it ain’t.” the man said sarcastically. In response, the woman slapped him disapprovingly on the arm. “Hey.” The man glowered, nursing the sudden rush of pain to his shoulder. “Gorram it Zoe. It ain’t my fault. The ruttin’ girl came out of nowhere – knocked Vera clean outta my hand too.” Rose scrunched her eyes. She hadn’t noticed any other female companion, other than the nice lady before her. “Vera?” The man lifted his firearm off the ground, and proudly stroked the barrel. “It’s the name of my gun.” he explained. Rose chuckled. It was the funniest thing that she had heard in her life. “You named your gun Vera? Are you a big girl or something?” The words rang uncomfortably in the big man’s ears. Another crazy person had called him a girl once. There was no rutting way that he would ever show this one that he had man parts, no matter how badly he wanted to prove it. Besides, they were standing in broad daylight. “I sure as hell ain’t no girl.” he said bluntly. Rose collected herself. “Okay, no need to be so defensive. I was just teasing. What’s your name? I didn’t catch it before. I’m Rose, by the way.” The mercenary froze. It felt like he had just bought a one-way ticket to the special hell. His face tightened, unable to respond. “Come on then.” Rose pressed. “I’ve told you mine. What’s yours?” Zoe sighed. The conversation was taking longer than she had anticipated. “Jayne, apologise to the girl so that we can leave. The Captain really ain’t the patient type.” Rose grinned. “You’re called Jayne? I thought that you said you weren’t a girl?” she paused, struggling to contain her amusement. “I’m just kidding.” Jayne’s eyes bubbled with anger. The little girl was damaging whatever self-control he had left. He looked determinedly at Zoe; every fibre of his being going into the next hushed sentence. “I don’t give a good gorram what you say, I ain’t apologising for nothin’.” “There you are!” came a cheery voice. Rose’s face dropped, hearing the cheerful cockney tones of the Time Lord. “Great.” she muttered. Jayne looked at The Doctor with a suspicious eye. He was confused and slightly unnerved by his sudden appearance. “Who’s he?” Jayne grumbled. Rose smiled softly in the Time Lord’s direction. His cheesy manner had a disarming quality. There was no way that she could stay angry with him for long. “You mean him? Oh, he’s just a friend. We travel together.” The Doctor bounced over to his companion. “I see that you’ve met some new friends!” Rose smiled awkwardly. “Yeah. You could say that.” The Doctor stood quietly, admiring the social gathering. It was nice to see his companion throwing herself into a new world. “See? I told you that you’d love this place. You’re already talking to the locals! How’s the search going? Have you found him yet?” The colour drained from Rose’s cheeks. “Sort of.” she grumbled. “What do you mean, sort of?” The Doctor said in an overemphasised tone. “I got distracted.” Rose muttered. “He’s around here, somewhere.” Suddenly, The Doctor approached Zoe and Jayne, and shook their hands. “I’m the Doctor, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” he beamed. “If you’ll excuse us, we’re kind of busy right now. Well, I say kind of, but it’s actually a matter of life and death. We have a thief to catch.” Jayne’s eyes lit up. “A thief?” “That’s right, a little boy.” The Doctor explained. “You haven’t seen him running around here by any chance?” The Doctor inquired. “He’s in the possession of some rather important items, and we’d really like to get them back.” Rose pointed to an armed guard standing in a nearby passageway. “I think he ran in there.” The Doctor observed the large, dreadlocked guard with a semi automatic. “I’m sure we can ask the nice man at the door to let us in.” Jayne snorted. It was the craziest thing that he had heard in his life. “Ain’t nobody goes in there, ‘less they have a business arrangement.” The Doctor ignored the big man’s words. “I don’t see why not. We’ll only take a minute of their time.” Zoe shook her head. It was a miracle that any words of wisdom came from Jayne Cobb. The fact that she agreed with him on this occasion was a mite disturbing. “He’s right. There’s no way you can get past the guard. Although, we can help you gain access. Our Captain has a meeting lined up with a man named Badger. He owns the place” “Excellent!” The Doctor chirped. “So, you’ll help us then?” Zoe placed her hands onto her hips. “You mentioned that these items are important? Can you give us any indication as to what they may be?” “A couple of priceless family heirlooms.” The Doctor said vaguely. “They’ve been in the family a long, long, long time. I like to carry them on me at all times.” “I lost my communications device as well.” Rose added. The Doctor laughed nervously. “What she actually means is that she lost her cortex pad.” he said, adopting the vernacular of this world. “It has a list of all these private numbers in it. We wouldn’t want anyone getting their hands on them.” “Yeah.” Rose blushed. “What he said.” Zoe looked suspiciously at the unlikely couple. There was something slightly odd about these travellers, and she couldn’t put her finger on it. Jayne grinned. “Course, we have to name a price. The Captain ain’t likely to hand out our services for free.” Zoe’s eyes narrowed, sensing his money-making fantasies. “Jayne?” Jayne leaned in closer to the warrior woman. It would be rutting crazy if they backed away from an opportunity like this. “Gorram it Zoe. We should hear these folk out, and make us some decent coin. It’s been near a month since we last got paid, and I’m gettin’ tired of waitin’.” “Ah.” The Doctor said worriedly. “I was hoping that money wouldn’t be an issue.” Rose nudged the Doctor in the ribs. They hadn’t come this far to walk away from the only chance to find the culprit. “What?” the Doctor protested. “I’m sure that we could come up with some kind of alternative payment?” “It depends on what you might have to trade.” Zoe remarked. “A piece of clothing perhaps?” “I got my eye on the girl.” Jayne said naughtily. Zoe slapped Jayne in the chest. There were times that she wished she could reprogram him like an automated trash drone. The merc’s comments rarely made a contribution to any conversation. “Hang on. I might have something that’s helpful.” Rose interrupted. Awkwardly, she reached into her top. A wide grin flashed across her face as she pulled out some coloured notes. The Doctor’s eyes widened. He had never seen so much money in his life. It was a mystery as to how she had acquired it in the first place. It was an even bigger mystery as to why the pickpocket hadn’t swiped it. “How did you manage to keep that out of sight?” Rose flashed a playful grin. “Let’s just say that girls have more hiding places than you men.” “I know that, but where did you get it? I don’t recall handing out pocket money.” The Doctor spluttered Rose sighed. “I thought that we might need some, in case of an emergency, like the one that we’re in right now. Plus, I wanted to buy some new clothes while we were ‘ere.” Jayne ogled the wad of brightly coloured paper. He had died and gone to heaven. A thousand possibilities ran through his mind. “So, we have a deal then?” Rose grinned. Jayne blinked slowly as a thought came to the surface. “Why ain’t you folks callin’ the Feds?” Rose’s heart skipped a nervous beat. She couldn’t exactly say that they had fallen through time and were now stranded. She bit her lower lip, struggling to think of a convincing cover story. “We’re illegal aliens!” she finally blurted out. “Both of us.” The young girl’s statement made Jayne’s brain ache. “How come they look just like us?” he said, turning to Zoe. The warrior woman sighed. “They ain’t real aliens Jayne.” The Doctor raised a finger, trying to catch Zoe’s attention. “I don’t know about Rose, but I certainly fit into-“ Suddenly Rose nudged him in the ribs once again. “Careful.” she said quietly. The Doctor winced, getting the young girl’s point. “I believe that we now have some kind of arrangement?” he said, moving the conversation forward. Jayne stared wide-eyed with excitement. It was a no-brainer. Zoe would have to be out of her rutting mind to refuse this offer. Zoe nodded. “I’d say that we do, but I can’t promise you anything. Least not until we talk it over with our Captain.” The Doctor pulled a satisfied smile. It was the best thing that he had heard all day. Their journey to this world wasn’t a complete disaster. They would soon be reunited with the TARDIS after all. “Our vessel is in the docking bay.” Zoe explained. “It ain’t too far from here.” “That’s not a problem.” the Doctor said with a big smile. “Take me to your leader!” On that note, Zoe and Jayne ventured away from the bustling marketplace with the Doctor and Rose in tow. A mild wind picked up, blowing Rose’s blonde locks about her face. She looked up at the Doctor, who seemed like he’d just won the national lottery. “This doesn’t feel right somehow.” Rose said worriedly. “But I realise that it’s the only option we have right now.” “What makes you say that?” The Doctor asked. “They seem like good people, except the large one of course. He seems too preoccupied with money and very large firearms.” “I sensed that.” Rose said uncomfortably. “Did you know that he named his gun Vera?” The Doctor raised his eyebrows. “Really? That seems a touch disturbing.” Rose kept an eye on Zoe and Jayne, as they turned a corner. There was never a dull moment when travelling with the Doctor, she thought. Her latest adventure in the TARDIS had brought a lot of “Take me to your leader.” Rose groaned, repeating the Doctor’s earlier comment. “That’s so cheesy.” The Doctor frowned, “There are no alien races in this universe. As the first alien to set foot here, I thought it was rather funny.” “What? There are none at all?” Rose replied. “Well, not counting myself, of course. Every corner of this universe is filled with humanity. There’s not a drop of alien DNA to be found anywhere. It’s a shame really, when you think about it.” “How come there are just humans then?” Rose asked. “What happened to the Daleks or Gelth? “Thousands of aliens were systematically wiped out around a decade ago. Entire species slowly vanished. They are still a few around who have gone into hiding. They have to maintain their numbers. Of course, humanity is now the last remaining species to roam the universe. Although, even their numbers are declining as we speak.” he explained. “That doesn’t make sense. We’ve travelled to futures where aliens and humanity co exist.” The Doctor sighed. “The alien races of the universe will soon return to their normal way of life, once the threat, whatever it may be, has fully dissipated.” “It’s such a cheesy comment though.” Rose stressed. “Couldn’t you have come up with something better?” “I am cheesy.” The Doctor insisted. “I won an award once, on a planet that consisted entirely of cheese.” “If you say so.” Rose said sceptically. “It’s true.” The Doctor assured. His attention moved to Zoe and Jayne, who had already put some distance between them. “Come on. We don’t want to lose our new friends.”

***

Mid bulk transport, Classification 03-K64. Firefly. The Eavesdown Docks, 10 minutes later.

The mid bulk transport, Serenity, sat proudly in the docking bay. Its main ramp had been lowered upon arrival, exposing its vast interior to the outside world. In the middle of the ramp, Kaywinnet Lee Frye lounged in a deckchair. Her face was cheerful and welcoming, as she watched the crowd ebb and flow round the marketplace. Attentively she sat up, recognizing Zoe as she made her way back to the ship. She took note of the new faces that followed shortly from behind. “Hey Zoe!” she beamed. “We takin’ on board new passengers?” “Not quite.” Zoe corrected. “Have you seen the Captain?” Kaylee gestured to the passageway leading out of Serenity’s cargo bay. “He’s in the infirmary with Simon. He still ain’t happy ‘bout River. ” Zoe smiled, placing a hand on the young girl’s shoulder. “Xie xie.” “No problem Zoe.” Kaylee chirped as Zoe continued towards the cargo bay. Rose nervously followed Zoe into the belly of the ship. The interior was spacious, with a series of walkways and stairwells overhead. She had visited many weird places in the TARDIS – from spaceships with time windows to underground museums. She had never witnessed anything of this magnitude. The ceiling stretched for metres above. The main floor was littered with storage containers and the faint smell of cows lingered in the air. From behind, Rose could hear the sound of heavy breathing. She slowly turned, spotting Jayne Cobb with a naughty glint in his eye. God knows what was running through the mercenary’s mind, she thought. Rose shuddered. On second thoughts, she would rather not know. “So, you guys actually live here?” she said quickly, walking into the middle of the room. Zoe nodded. “We sure do.” Rose looked wide-eyed at the warrior woman. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Seriously?” A puzzled look crossed Zoe’s face. “Of course. Why do you ask?” “There’s no reason.” Rose said nervously. “It’s lovely actually. I haven’t set foot on a ship like this before.” The Time Lord stepped forward to admire the room. His eyes wandered around the bulkheads, taking note of its construction. “It’s a cargo ship.” he explained. “Firefly class. They don’t make them anymore. It’s a good design, and very understated.” “Glad that you approve.” came a voice. “Sir.” Zoe greeted. Just then, Captain Mal Reynolds approached the group. The Doctor turned, acknowledging his presence. He looked like a decent man, despite the troubled, brooding exterior. A younger man followed from behind. From what the Doctor could gather, he must have been the ship’s medic. “I’m Captain Mal Reynolds. What brings you folks aboard my ship?” Mal asked, refastening the buttons on his right sleeve. The Doctor opened his mouth, ready to explain. Before he could form a sentence, Zoe briefed her superior in private. “We found them in the market place.” Zoe said quietly. “They claim to be the victims of a pickpocket. He was last seen going into Badger’s den. Thought you might want to deal with this one.” “Did they mention what had been taken?” Mal asked, folding his arms across his chest. Zoe nodded. “Just a couple of family heirlooms. They never elaborated on more than that. They do seem pretty eager to get back what was stolen from them.” “Who do I need to talk this over with?” Mal said, eyeing the two mismatched travellers. “The man in the long brown coat.” Zoe said, pointing to the Doctor. “Are you sayin’ that you’re willing to help them?” “Of course Zoe.” Mal said impartially. “Don’t see no harm in helpin’ out some folk while we’re here.” Mal glanced at the Time Lord and then back to his second in command. “You think he fought against unification?” he said, observing the Time Lord’s attire. Zoe nodded. “Could be that he fought on our side. They ain’t keen on talking to the Feds.” Mal rubbed the back of his neck, taking on board everything that Zoe had to say. “How much are they willing to part with?” he asked. “Enough to make Jayne drool like a baby.” Zoe chuckled “I see.” Mal said with growing interest. “Well then, I’d better go meet our new clients.” Confidently, Mal marched up to the Time Lord. It had been a long damn, while since they had met fresh new clients. Their lifestyle of petty thievery had sent them to the furthest corner of the Rim. They had spent near two months searching for work – both legal and illegal. Life was never easy out in the black. It was refreshing to have two job opportunities come along at once. Mal clasped his hands together. “I hear you folks are in need of some help?” “That’s right.” the Doctor replied. “We don’t want to be any trouble. I hear that you’re the man that can ensure the safe return of our belongings?” “There’s no job too small.” Mal said reassuringly. “We aim to serve the needs of others.” “That sounds reassuring.” The Doctor replied. “If you have any questions regarding payment, ask my friend Rose.” “Pardon me for askin’, but did you happen to fight in the war at all?” Mal asked, folding his arms across his chest. The Doctor opened his mouth, not quite sure how to respond to the question. “You could say that I’ve fought in a war.” “What company did you serve with?” Mal asked, continuing his line of questioning. The Doctor squirmed, trying to figure out a way to dodge this friendly interrogation. “Oh, I really couldn’t say. We lost the war. I’m freelance now.” Mal smiled. “Well, anyone that works freelance is someone that I want to do business with.” The Doctor looked stunned. “Is that it? You’re willing to help us? You’re not in the least bit curious about our stolen items?” Mal shook his head. “Don’t see that it’s any of our business is all.” he explained. “I can take you to see Badger. That’s our arrangement. We can have your things returned to you while we get down to some business of our own. I should warn you, that he don’t take kindly to anyone entering his domain. Keep quiet and let me do the talking. ” Mal explained. The Doctor raised his eyebrows. This Badger fellow seemed like an interesting fellow. . “That sounds like a straightforward plan.” “Alright then.” Mal announced, clapping his hands together. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to inform my crew that we’ve got a deal, and we can get down to business.”

***

It didn’t take the crew long to reach Badger’s den. The Doctor and Rose were escorted down a long, makeshift corridor, until they finally emerged into an open area. It was a cosy little set up – nothing more than a cunningly arranged hole masked by freight containers. The walls were draped in an assortment of knickknacks – everything from 1960’s pop art to 23rd century body armour. A large fishing net hung low across the ceiling, providing some protection against the afternoon sun. Rose stood in awe. There were items from 20th century earth on display. It was a goldmine of paraphernalia. At the other side of the room, a little man in a brown suit and bowler hat waited at his desk. His work area was littered with all kinds of bulletins and contracts. A couple of armed guards were positioned at every exit - a precaution that the little man had turned into an art form. . He sat quietly, twisting the handle of a mechanical apple peeler. “What ‘ave we got ‘ere then?” he said suspiciously, taking note of the new arrivals. In response, Mal flashed his usual charming smile, although it was the least flattering quality that Badger liked about his client. “He’s a doctor. Claims that some shou took a likin’ to their belongings. Thought you might know something about that?” Badger slowly leaned over his desk. “Doctor who?” he said nonchalantly The Doctor stood quietly, observing the dance between these two men. It was clear that they had a difficult working relationship. The little man ran an impressive operation from what he could tell; even it was for all the wrong reasons. “It’s really not important.” The Doctor interrupted, breaking away from his current train of thought “What is important, is the exact location of the little boy who ran in here.” “I ‘aven’t done anythin’.” Badger said innocently. “I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.” “Oh I think you do.” The Doctor said in a dangerous voice. “This whole place stinks of wrong doing, and you’re in the middle of it.” Rose playfully stepped forward. “You really don’t want to make him upset.” she remarked. Badger looked at Rose, taking a sudden interest in the young girl. “Ere love?” he called. “You’re a long way from the old homestead. What brings you to Persephone?” Rose leaned over the Doctor’s shoulder. “What’s he talking about?” she asked worriedly The Doctor looked blankly at his companion. “I suggest that you play along, and try to keep it brief, I really want to get this over with.” Rose smiled uncomfortably, and entertained the creepy little man. “Oh, no reason. I wanted to travel the universe, and see the sights. I’m from the Powell estate, ‘ave you heard of it?” Badger stroked his chin, deep in thought. “It’s a posh area, lots of big businesses and the like. Nice of you to grace us with your presence.” Rose playfully hit the Doctor on the arm. “He thinks that I’m posh.” she giggled. The Doctor rolled his eyes. “Enough of this chit chat. You’re either going to help us or not. I suggest that you chose wisely.” He scanned the room with an uncomfortable gaze. “I think I’m already starting to develop an allergy to this place.” Badger looked stunned. The Doctor had to be insane to make demands - especially under his own roof. “Come on then. The Doctor asked you a question.” Rose said firmly. “What ‘ave you done with ‘im?” The little man’s eyes narrowed, disliking the attitude of these tourists “’Ere, what makes you think I’m responsible for your mishap?” Mal flashed another charming smile. “A boy was last seen coming into your establishment, carrying something that didn’t belong to him. I’d say that pretty much makes you responsible.” “This is embarrassing.” Badger gloated. “You actually think that you can walk in ‘ere and accuse me of theft?” The Doctor cocked his head slightly, mulling over the statement. “That’s pretty much the gist of it, yeah.” he replied. A mischievous glint entered Badger’s eye. “What if I ‘ave got your stuff? It’ll cost you a pretty penny to get it back.” “Ah. That may prove difficult.” The Doctor explained. “We gave the last of our money to Captain Reynolds.” Badger looked Mal straight in the eye. “You’re workin’ for these bin ke now? How much is he paying you? We still ‘ave an arrangement. Or did that little detail just ‘appen to slip your mind?” “My mind’s in perfect workin’ order, Badger.” Mal said cockily. “See no harm in helping a couple of strangers is all.” “I’ll see if I can be of some assistance then.” Badger said half-heartedly. The little man whistled, signally for a guard. A couple of seconds later, a brutish man emerged, pushing a young boy into the room. Harshly, the boy fell to the ground, scattering the stolen items onto the floor. The young boy sobbed, clutching his face. Badger kneeled down, picking up a small rucksack. He pulled out a long silver object, and examined it closely. The little man poked and prodded its shiny surface, trying to figure out its purpose. It looked like Alliance technology; clean, efficient and of considerable value on the market. The Doctor grew nervous, hoping that he would soon lose interest. “I really wouldn’t do that if I were you.” he urged. Badger carelessly waved the screwdriver around in one hand. “You work for the Alliance or somethin’?” Mal shook his head. There was oddness to the couple, but they weren’t the enemy. “They aren’t Alliance.” he assured. Badger looked suspiciously at Mal. “How can you be sure?” Carefully, he upturned the bag, allowing the TARDIS key and Rose’s mobile phone fall out. “What’s this then?” he muttered. Just then, a burlesque man stumbled through the back entrance. His face was weary, and sweat stained his Blue Sun brand vest. “’Ere boss!” he wheezed. “We found a large blue box not too far from here. Where’d you want us to put it?” The Doctor raised his eyebrows. “Ah! I see that it didn’t take you long to find the TARDIS. Well, another of my family heirlooms anyway.” Mal gave the Time Lord a sideways glance. “Exactly how many family heirlooms do you have in your possession?” Badger glared at his henchman. He didn’t like interruptions – especially during a business meeting. “What did I tell you about barging in uninvited? I don’t care where you put it, get it out of my sight.” The Doctor faced the burly man. “If I find so much as a scratch on it, I won’t be pleased.” he stated. Badger’s eyes narrowed, sensing more than anger in The Doctor’s words. “What’s so special about this TARDIS then?” An uninterested look flashed across the Doctor’s face. “Oh nothing really. I keep it purely for nostalgic reasons.” Badger moved from his desk, and looked the Time Lord up and down. “I don’t believe you. You’re holding somethin’ back.” he said in a low, dangerous voice. “We aren’t hiding anything.” The Doctor protested. “If we were holding something back, I certainly wouldn’t tell you.” Badger sighed. It was clear that he couldn’t glean any information from The Doctor, and that annoyed him. “This isn’t a laughing matter. You’re going to tell me what I need to know, or the pretty girl will be spendin’ the rest of her days in a cage.” Rose’s eyes widened. She wouldn’t be sold off to some hairy slave trader or worse. “He can’t do that!” she snapped. “Doctor, tell ‘im!” Without a second thought, Badger pocketed the sonic screwdriver. “I can do what I like, love.” Rose glared at the rat faced little man. “You’re inhumane you are!” The Doctor’s face boiled with anger. He wouldn’t let any harm come to his travelling companion. “Rose stays with me. She’s not for sale.” Calmly, Mal stepped forward in an attempt to ease the situation. He had heard enough of this verbal tennis match. “Seeing as I’m the one responsible for bringing them here, and you seem unwilling to hand over what’s theirs, why don’t we change our little arrangement?” he offered. Badger’s brow furrowed. He didn’t like the way this conversation was heading. “Don’t get cocky with me Captain Reynolds. You work for me, remember? I’m still the one callin’ the shots.” The Doctor looked stone faced at the little man “I don’t answer to anyone.” “This is embarrassing.” Badger sighed, growing weary of the conversation. “You seem to be forgetting who’s in charge ‘ere. Who are you to make demands in my den?” “I’m the Doctor.” The Time Lord said with a hint of authority. “I’m fully aware of who’s in charge, but it doesn’t change the fact that I don’t answer to anyone. Ask Rose, she’ll back up what I’m saying.” Rose chuckled at the Time Lord’s remarks. “He’s right.” “Say I agree to your offer.” Badger said, reclining in his chair. “What ‘ave you got in mind?” “Here’s the deal.” Mal began. “I wouldn’t mind a spare pair of hands on this job. If the Doctor and Rose can secure whatever cargo you need shifted off world, then you’ll hand over their stolen items as payment. I also expect to see my cash, in full when we return. If the job goes south, you can keep what’s theirs, no questions asked.” “That sounds about right, but there’s a problem see?” Badger said cryptically. “I don’t need to off load any cargo. I need you to steal somethin’.” “I won’t have any part of this.” The Doctor said doggedly. Badger smirked, sensing the Doctor’s strong moral beliefs. “You ‘ave no choice in the matter. You scratch my back, and I’ll scratch yours. That’s ‘ow we do business round here.” Rose rushed forward, placing herself between Badger and the Time Lord. “Doctor, it’s all right. I’ll do it, if it means we get our things back.” The Doctor placed both his hands onto Rose’s face. “That’s what concerns me.” he hissed. “I won’t let you do this. It’s not right.” Rose stared reassuringly into the Time Lord’s eyes, “This’ll all be over before you can say Raxacoricofallapatorious, yeah?” Badger wagged his finger with satisfaction. “She’s more than just a pretty girl. I suggest you listen to her.” Rose released the Doctor’s grip on her face, and pulled his hands down by her side. “Like he said, we don’t ‘ave any choice in the matter.” Badger turned away from the display of affection, and addressed Mal. “One other thing. If the pretty girl fails to deliver the goods, they tell me what’s so special ‘bout the little blue box.” Mal nodded. “That seems fair, long as you keep to your end of the bargain.” Badger glared at Mal. He was a businessman, and a man of his word. “I intend to.” he said firmly. “So, we ‘ave us a deal then?” Rose nodded. She was willing to accept the little man’s offer. “Yeah. We have us a deal.” The little man clicked his fingers. Within seconds, another thuggish man shuffled in from the back entrance, carrying a stylish garment in his arms. “You’ll be needin’ this then.” Badger said, gesturing to the piece of clothing. . A look of panic crossed Rose’s face, as she laid her eyes upon a black and pink showgirl outfit. “Oh, I’m not wearing that! You can’t make me!” she protested. “Doctor, tell ‘im!” The Doctor rubbed the left hand side of his face. “It’s not my decision.” he said flippantly. “Besides, it’s a lovely dress. I hope that it’s in her size?” “You’re not helpin’.” Rose hissed, giving the Time Lord a sideways glance. “One size fits all.” Badger said smugly. “Excellent!” The Doctor beamed. He turned to face Rose, and pulled a cheesy smile. “You’ll need to find somewhere to put it on.” Rose shot an icy cold stare at the Time Lord. She couldn’t believe that he was unwilling to intervene. “You’re so dead.” she grumbled. Badger frowned, puzzled by the young girl’s reluctance. “You’ll be needin’ to get past the security.” Rose stared moodily at the outfit. It the most hideous thing she had seen in her life.

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Next - STOLEN Part 2: Dressed To Kill!