A/N: Not my characters, although I did name all the dinos myself.

I think I should at least get extra points for using the "Release the secret weapon" line.

*******

"Fellow saurians, I have grave news!" Steggy paced back and forth across the radar screen, addressing the group. "The humans have struck back against us. The greasy one thwarted our last offensive: somehow she gained knowledge of our imminent victory over the Engine Thruster Gauge Panel, and chose the very moment of our triumph to surge the power. Her duplicity resulted in the tragic loss of Lucy's foot." He nodded gravely to Lucy. "For this, Lucy shall be awarded a medal of bravery. Monroe?" Monroe stepped forward and, with a bit of difficulty, placed a large, tin-foil necklace over Lucy's neck. Standing back, he snapped her a smart salute before returning to Steggy's side. "We honor you for your service, Lucy."

"But fear not, my friends!," Steggy continued. "For I have developed a new plan! It shall be called Plan D, and it will gain us much ground in the confrontation! For this plan, we have recruited a new operative, directly from the training grounds at the Persephone General Store. Steve! Step forward and be identified!"

A small, yellow pterodactyl shuffled forward, giving Steggy and the assembled dinos a salute. "Private Steve reporting for duty, sir!"

"Excellent, Steve! You will serve us well! But we have further surprises for this day's battle!" Steve stepped back as Steggy motioned to Monroe again. "Monroe, bring forth....the Secret Weapon!" Lucy swung her head and cheered in anticipation.

Monroe stepped forward again, this time dragging a large roll of tape. "I present to you....Duck Tape! Freshly stolen from the burly but stupid one's storage locker!," Monroe waved his tiny arms in excitement.

"Amazing!" Lucy wasn't sure exactly what Duck Tape was, but she was all for it. "But, Steggy, I don't see any ducks."

"Ah, Lucy! You have been fooled by the crafty humans! 'Duck' is obviously a code-name they use to keep the Secret Weapon a.....secret." Steggy felt he needed to explain the plan, since Lucy obviously wasn't going to figure it out on her own. "Today is a glorious day for our kind! Using our new Secret Weapon, Steve will fly from our largish, blinking land over to the plushy, pilot's chair land. Once there, the Secret Weapon will serve as a bridge so our troops may conquer the area! This will serve us well for the final battle with the humans!"

"Indeed, Steggy! And the cute and funny god shall smile upon us! Shall we begin our assault, my friends?" Monroe raised his arms in question and was met with a resounding affirmative from the other lizards. "Steve! Go forth to defeat the lowly humans!" Steve came forward and accepted the Secret Weapon. Monroe unfurled the loose end of the tape and stuck it to the console. "Come, Lucy! Your tiny brain and enormous bulk shall be handy today!"

Lucy struggled over and stood atop the tape, proud to be making a contribution despite her injury. "Excellent! Already the plan is working perfectly!"

"Indeed it is, Lucy! Steve! Begin the attack!," Steggy ordered.

Steve once again saluted, and with a mighty heave, took off and cleared the space between the console and the pilots chair, landing on one of the arms. He turned to yell back across the chasm. "Approach! Our time of victory is near at hand!" Monroe, Steggy and Lucy cheered. With Monroe leading the way, they began to cross the tape bridge to their destiny. Yes, this plan was genius!

But the earth started to shake, and the tape bridge became unstable. Monroe and Lucy looked around in confusion, but Steggy rapidly sized up the situation. "We are lost, my friends! The Amazonian goddess approaches, and we shall surely perish if she catches us not paying attention to the course corrections!" Steggy raised his voice. "Steve! You must persevere in the face of these odds! Release the Secret Weapon!"

With a grim nod, Steve gathered the roll of tape on his back, unfurled his mighty wings, and flew....

**

Mal sat in the copilot's seat, his face a mask of "I can't believe I'm hearing this". From behind Wash's chair, Simon and Kaylee could be heard quietly snickering as they worked with tools and solvents. Zoe said nothing, but the gleam in her eyes told everyone that she found her husband unbearably cute. Finally, Mal spoke.

"OK, Wash. Lemme ask again, an' I want a real answer this time." He pointed a no-nonsense finger at his pilot. "How'd you tape yourself to the chair?"