BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL

AGENTRUSCO

A Day In War
Monday, May 15, 2006

Brief lil fic about a moment of Mal in the war.


CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 1903    RATING: 10    SERIES: FIREFLY

Mal hunkered behind a shallow wall, sheltering himself from the steady rain of fist-sized bits of pulverized buildings.

"Damn, it's wet out." He observed wryly to no one but himself.

The barrage slowed so the chunks of debris became fewer and farther between. Mal checked his clip. Not as many rounds as he would have liked, but it would just have to do. Gathering his brown coat about himself, he brought his rifle to his shoulder and pivoted around his protective wall. His initial spray of bullets efficiently took out two unsuspecting Alliance soldiers as they were still cowering from the debris storm. Mal dashed past their sprawled bodies.

COMMENTS

Monday, May 15, 2006 6:43 PM

JORJAREYNOLDS


he brought his rife to his shoulder
should be rifle, but otherwise this is fantastic. Very gripping and riveting, i need more.

Monday, May 15, 2006 11:31 PM

AMDOBELL


I liked what you wrote so far but it was so short, I am hoping this was a sampler of a longer piece to come. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me

Tuesday, May 16, 2006 9:05 AM

AGENTRUSCO


yeh, i realize that there are flaws. I try to catch the spelling/grammar ones... but the other sorts, well, I'm daft. I also can't see this one goin any further. sorry.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006 9:31 AM

NOSADSEVEN


I know what it's like to get a brief moment like this stuck in the head... It's a nice glimpse.

On a technical note, as Anon. suggested, you probably don't mean 'cartridge' in that context. The cartridge is the round itself - made up of the bullet (the part that shoots out) and the casing (the part that often pops out the side and jingles on the ground next to the shooter, and contains the stuff that explodes to force the bullet out). Don't feel bad, though. Hollywood has never seemed to learn the difference.


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