Title: This One's On Me Rating: pg-13 to be safe Fandom: Firefly Pairing: none really Jayne/Kaylee buddies, mentions of Simon/Kaylee Word Count: 533 Summary: drunk Jayne and Kaylee Warning: I don't own the characters or the 'verse am I'm not making any money off this

Authors note: Not betaed, sorry.

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Kaylee’s laugh was probably a mite louder than normal. Jayne thought maybe he ought to cut her off, but the girl was hurtin’ something fierce and this was probably the first time in a week he’d heard Kaylee laugh. So instead he ordered her another drink. “’Nother drink for the lady.”

“Oh Jayne, you don’t gotta go—oh no,” she mumbled, her words slurring a little as she spoke. The ale in the mug had sloshed over the edge, pouring down her front and soaking her shirt to her. Jayne swallowed thickly when he could see her hard nipple through the clinging shirt. “Guess I do need a ‘nother drink,” she mumbled, taking the new mug of ale and drinking it down.

“Why don’t you take that easy, little girl,” Jayne said. Partly because he didn’t want her passing out drunk and partly because he wasn’t gonna have no coin in his pocket by the end of the night if she kept drinking like this.

“I can hold my liquor Jayne!” Kaylee said, rising from the stool indignantly then nearly falling over as the bar began to spin around her. She held onto the counter and burst into laughter again.

“Least you’re smilin’ now,” Jayne said, shaking his head and drinking his own beer. He could see out of the corner of his eyes two men whispering and lookin’ over at Kaylee. Jayne shifted closer to the mechanic and stared the two men down until they looked away. When the finally did he turned back to Kaylee and saw she wasn’t laughing no more.

“Am I pretty, Jayne?”

“Course you’re pretty,” he grunted.

“You’d sex me then?” she asked, leaning her head back onto his shoulder. He chuckled and nodded.

“Damn straight I would.”

“Why don’t the doc wanna sex me no more? I though we had a good thing goin’,” she sighed out.

“Doc ain’t leavin’ the ship on your account, little Kaylee. Time for him and that crazy sister of his t’move on. Ain’t got nothin’ t’do with you, girl.” Jayne wasn’t good at this comforting thing, but he was doing his best.

“He’s gonna be gone when we get back, ain’t he?” Kaylee asked.

“Don’t know, little Kaylee—probably,” Jayne shrugged.

“I could go with him,” she sighed.

“You could. But what would Serenity do without you?” Jayne asked.

“Probably fall out of the sky,” Kaylee said, taking the mug and drowning down another big gulp. There was a long moment of silence that was only broken when Kaylee hiccupped loudly. “Can we go back now?”

“Sure,” Jayne grunted. He rose, putting his arm around Kaylee to steady her. She stood up and paused for a moment.

“I feel sick,” she said. There wasn’t even a pause from when the words came out to when she was retching on his shoes. Jayne cursed loudly and caught her before she stumbled back.

“Gorramit girl, you couldn’t have aimed that somewhere else?” Jayne asked.

“Sorry,” came her slurred response.

“Gorram drunk girl,” he mumbled. Kaylee’s face fell and Jayne sighed. “You’re gonna be alright, kid,” Jayne said as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder to help her out of the bar.