He came in, Inara on his heels, face alight with some inner fire as he continued to, unknowingly, grind his world into more peices than could ever be counted. Even by River. Inara didn't meet anyones eyes, not even Kaylee's as she sat down. She stared forlornly down at the table, eyes lacking the will or the sheen that had formerly shown them to be alive. Zoe and Wash had already set the food, and Mal and Inara sat at the opposite ends of the table. Nobody moved. River sat opposite Simon, who's hand was tightly enclosd in Kaylee's. Jayne was looking warily 'twixt Zoe and River, who had both hurt him today. Zoe and Wash conversed in whispers, trying not to draw any attention to themselves. Mal looked at each of them in turn. "What?" He plastered on a smile that looked as if it were painted on by an artist from a insaniterium. "What? C'mon, everybody! Eat! Be happy, be merry!!" When no one moved still, he took a bite of his food, forcing it down. "C'mon! Everbody be as happy as you can be! Tell ya what, today is your official day off! Nobody does any work at all today! Do what you want with who you wanna do it with." He turned that horrible, perversion of what once could have been something like a smile to Simon and Kaylee. "Anythin' ya'll wanna do, go and do it. Cuz, I don't wanna see nobody on my boat unhappy at all, dong ma?" Nobody moved still, the food untouched. "What? Well, if ya'll ain't gonna be happy for yerselves, than I'm gonna be happy for ya!" He got up from the chair at the head of the long table, and walked past them all, to the hallway. From there, echoing, there was a sound of a foot hitting metal, and, echoingly, "Everbodys just so ruttin' happy!" And, then, Inara Serra started to cry. *** Kaylee sat on the couch next to Simon, eyes staring balefully at the nothingness that was the metal wall there. The Infirmary was cold, dead, and silent next to them. Finally, she spoke, voice barely as loud as a whisper. "I can't believe that 'Nara i leavin'." Simon shook his head, still not really able to comprehend it either. "Me too." The way she had just owned up to it... he had seen people break down after a severe trauma like rape, but that... that was heart-wrenching, had shown him what life would do to some people. It had unsettled him, to say the least. She didn't respond, just continued to look at the wall, eyes unseeing. He hated to see her like this. It killed hm, how dead and forlorn she looked. Almost like whipped dog, but ten times worse. He had learned to love her, over the months. He had to do something, but what... Ah. "Hey, do you want to listen to some music? I don't know, but it might help." For a minute, she didn't answer, and he wondered if she hadn't heard him. But, then, "Yeah, why not." He took her hand, and led her into his room. He kneeled down next to his bed, and, after a moment of fishing for it, he brought out a box, filled with a small-ish device and several disc boxes. "Whats that?" "A CD player." He should have guessed that she wouldn't know about it. The rim only bought the essentials, and while these were still rather common in the Core, they were fast being replaced by the new-age music storage machines, which used the cortex to upload music into it. Still, he preferred this. "And, let me guess, it plays CD's, right?" "Yeah." "Oh, what an original name." Uh-oh. She was being sarcastic. She was never sarcastic. He was in trouble. "Well, you can, um, see if theres anything you like there." He waved his hand at the box of, what he now relieved, was a collection of rather morbid songs. Whenever his parents had fought, he would lie down next to his bed and blast these songs about death and loss andlife. Because, in the end, most of the arguments were about him. His failures. His Father was a perfectionist, while his Mother was a realist. She would defend him. She leafed through his records, looking at many, discarding some, opening up others. He had a lot of Linkin Park, and Staind and AFI. And Thrice. Lots and lots of Thrice albums. What could he say? The new age techno-pop beat that was all the rage had never been his forte. Earth-that-was music was the best for the likes of him, even if it did cost more than new age stuff. Hell, he had once bought an entire Everclear CD for the one song on it, 'Wonderful'. That song had made him cry until he was twelve. But he would always listen to it, anyway. Finaly, she pulled out one CD from its case. Simon looked at it. A Staind CD. He placed it in the player, and he offered one ear-piece to Kaylee, and put the other in his ear. She followed suit. Soon, they were listeing to the melodious sounds of the song "Right Here." "But you always find a way, you keep me right here, waiting. You always find the words to say, you keep me right here, waiting. And if you chose to walk away, I'd still be right here, waiting..." His arms slowly wound around her, bringing her close to him. He tried to give her all of the love and support he could give her, through that one, simple gesture. She clund desperately to him, loath to let go for anything at all. Even death. And, for only the second time in the months he had been onboard, he kissed her. He kissed her full on the lips, and she relaxed into it. And, when he pulled away, she cried on his shoulder. Cried for everything she was losing, everything she was gaining, and all the ways that the 'verse would continue to toy with her. "But I always find a way, I keep you right here waiting. I always find the words to say, to keep you right here waiting. And if I chose to walk away, would you be right here, waiting? Always find the words to say, I keep you right here, waiting..." Eventually, she cried herself to sleep, still clinging to him for dear life. The song ended. He, as softly as he could, put the CD player on the stand, letting the headphones dangle off of the side. He kissed her brow. Softly, he sang the words from a song that he had first heard so long ago. The Shepard would have liked this band. Thrice. "We are son and heirs of grace, and we are children of, a light never dims, a love that never dies, so keep your chin up, child, and wipe the tears from your eyes." And, with that, Simon lay down upon his bed, Kaylee still tight in his embrace. He would not deny he that one comfort. Not tonight. *** Kaylee watched as Simon bustled about the Infirmary, trying to find something that she didn't really know about. She slowly went up to him, in full view if he had bothered to look up. As it were, she caught him by surprise. "Hey, Simon, how is everything?" He looked up, and said rather too loudly, "FENG!!!" Then, seeing it was Kaylee, he softened up. "Oh, hi, Kaylee. Well, I have to find River's medication, and I have no idea where it is." "Well, what does it look like? Maybe I can help find it." "Its a syringe, filled with a redish liquid." She pointed at the tray nestled on the chair that took up a good portion of the room. "Like that?" Simon turned andlooked at it. "Yeah, thats it." His shoulders slumped. "How could I have missed that?" She chuckled lightly. "Aw, your just a mite over worked, is all. Ya just need ta relax a lil'. Stop tryin' ta be superman and just be Simon." He gave her a quizzical look. "Superman?" She giggled. "Oh, yeh, he was this legend from my place on Harvest. This guy, got zapped with radiation or someat, and got all these super powers from it. Its a kid story the folks there used whenever the kids got frightened a monsters in there closets. 'Don't worry 'bout those monsters, Superman will drive 'em away.' Y'know, the like." "Oh." He looked thoughtful for a moment. "Say, have you heard?" "'bout what?" She gave him as good a suspicious look she could muster. "Inara's going to stay on the ship!" "WHAT?!?! Oh, Simon!" She lurched forward and gave him as big a hug and as huge a smile as there ever was. "This is just so shiny! Now, all I need to learn is to dance a waltz, and everything will be almost perfect!" Dance a Waltz? Why had she said that? Probably cuz she knew that Simon could dance. And, sure enough, "Well, I could show you how to." "Really?" "Sure." He stepped outside the cramped space of the Infirmary, and struck a pose. "My Lady, if you will?" Trying, and mostly succeding, not to give off a squeal of pure delight, Kaylee took his hand and set about learning the steps. Soon, she just about had the hang of it, and then- "Awww, how sweet. Young love." Jubal Early stepped out from the shadows, worse than any monster. Non-chalantly, he shot Simon in the gut. He gave off a moan of pain and sank to his knees, clutching his stomach as he tried to stem the torrent that was his blood. Early stepped up to her. "I'm sure you remember what I promised?" Simon grabbed at his leg, leaving no mark on his blood-red suit. "No... you can't... not... Kaylee..." Jubal glared at him. "Why ain't you dead yet, boy?" Simon managed a small grin at him. "Guess it's just... one of my... worse qualities..." He coughed and spat up blood on Early's boots. The man grimaced. "Well, I'll just have to fix that, won't I?" Grinning happily, Jubal Early leveled the gun at Simon's head and fired.