"Please." Kaylee smiled and flashed her big brown eyes at Simon beseechingly.

Simon rolled his eyes. "Kaylee, that's...simply very disturbing." He paused and thought for a moment. "Does this mean...do you have some kind of feelings for the captain?"

"Of course not, silly. I only have eyes for you. I just thought we could try a little role playing is all." Kaylee leaned up and kissed him as her hands wandered south to his cock.

"But why...I don't think most people play at being people they actually know," Simon said dubiously, but his body's responses to Kaylee were making it hard for his brain to function quite perfectly. "Have the captain and Inara ever even...? After the way he's been looking at River recently, I certainly shouldn't think so."

"I don't think the captain and Inara have so much as kissed, and that's why it'll be fun. We'll get to live out their fantasies for them." Kaylee murmured before running her tongue around his ear and then nibbling gently on the lobe.

It was on the tip of Simon's tongue to say that he was afraid that to fulfill the captain's fantasies, Kaylee would have to be River, but he certainly didn't want to think about...well, about that, with Kaylee caressing him as she was. "O-okay...how do we start?" he asked, rather clueless.

Kaylee released Simon and began pacing as she mused over the idea for a minute. "First we have to dress the parts."

"Oh, no..." Simon had known this would be bad, and without Kaylee's fevered touches, he was sure of it. "I am not going to the captain and asking to borrow his boots just because you have some...idea," he said, waving his hand for emphasis.

"Well I guess there's no need for me to go get dressed up in that black dress Inara gave me then either. You know the one you've been dying to see me in with that side slit."

A slow flush started up Simon's face. Finally, he decided that compromise was, after all, the wise man's choice. "You go get the captain's clothes. He won't hit you."

Beaming, Kaylee walked over to the door with a sexy little swish. "I'll be right back."

Simon settled on the bed, trying to imagine how in the 'verse he was going to pull this off to Kaylee's satisfaction. All the Captain and Inara ever did was argue. Did she want to argue during sex? Probably not. So he would have to pretend to be Mal, but...nice. Was Mal ever nice? Simon was becoming more unsure about this project by the moment.

Kaylee was careful as she snuck from Simon's dorm room up to the crew bunks. She was walked as silently as she could and was relieved that she didn't run into anyone else, especially the captain, when she got to his bunk.

Mal watched from the cockpit as Kaylee snuck down the corridor in her bare feet, her face all alight with excitement.

From behind him, River shook her head. "If it were me, you wouldn't have caught me," she said in a clear, soft voice, startling him.

Mal measured River with his eyes for a moment before a grin worked its way onto his face. "Reckon you're right, darlin'. But what in the sphincter of hell is Kaylee sneaking into my bunk for?"

She tugged him away, back to the stars and the calm of the cockpit. "You'll get them back. Don't want to know anything else, trust me."

Kaylee giggled in relief as she struggled not to drop Mal's clothes as she opened Simon's door.

"Oh, Lord." Simon automatically rose to help her with them. "All these? For a rather casual man, he certainly wears a good many clothes, doesn't he?" He eyed breeches, suspenders, undershirt, shirt, socks and boots before remarking one curious lack, then shaking his head. It wasn't as though he really wanted to wear Malcolm Reynolds' underwear anyway. His own would do just fine.

"Yeah he does." Kaylee placed the bundle on the bed. What a surprise it was to discover the captain didn't have or wear any underwear!

Resigned, Simon began stripping down and pulling on the assumed clothes, though Kaylee had to help him with the boots. It was funny how different the clothes made him feel--rather powerful and commanding, in fact. "Now you," he said, forcefully.

Kaylee's eyes widened in pleasure. She'd never heard Simon use that particular tone before with her, and she liked it. Beaming, she turned and opened the closet that held her dresses and Simon's shirts and vests. Rummaging past her pink lace dress, she found her outfit. Stripping quickly she pulled the black silk dress on. It clung to her body like a second skin. The slit on the left side ran from floor to waist and the neckline was cut daringly low and showed her breasts off.

She offered her back to Simon in silent plea for him to zip her up.

He did, quickly, and then wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her back against him hard. Getting a little more into the spirit of things, he murmured, with his best attempt at a drawl, "Well, now, don't you look pretty?"

"Thank you, Captain. How kind of you to say so." Kaylee turned around and smiled charmingly at Simon.

Simon lifted an eyebrow. "That for my benefit, or are you off whoring tonight?" If she wanted him to be Mal--well, he'd be Mal. He suppressed a small, devious chuckle.

"Captain, how many times have I asked you not to call me a whore?"

"Yeah, but how many times have you been a whore anyhow? I'm probably behind, truth be told." He reached around to swat at Kaylee's bottom. The captain seemed like a swatting kind of man.

Kaylee smacked his arm. "Captain, I am not going to dignify that question with an answer. Besides, what business is that of yours?"

He pulled her in tight, hugging her to him and nibbling at her neck. His pretty, soft little Kaylee was adorable trying to play at being Inara. He squeezed her bottom firmly. "Cause it is my business."

Kaylee melted as Simon nibbled on her neck and since apparently he wasn't going to play fair, neither would she. Pulling herself from his embrace, she smiled graciously at him. "Captain, you know I don't service crew."

Simon glowered a bit. "I ain't crew," he said, pulling her to him again, a little more roughly. "I'm the captain." He squeezed one of her breasts firmly. "'sides, don't think I was asking you for servicing."

"Well, since you're not, I am." Kaylee simpered as she kissed him.

Simon kissed her hard, wondering what Inara's curls would be like between his fingers. Surely they couldn't be as silky as the ones he now had a handful of. He began rucking up her dress almost frantically with one hand, wanting more of her to touch.

Kaylee ran her hands across Simon's chest pretending it was Mal's. Gripping the suspenders, her body throbbed as she eased them off his shoulders.

He tugged her towards the bed, eager to see her splayed out in front of him in that dress. Pushing her down, he continued kissing her, his hands moving for every inch of skin they could find and sliding into her panties to squeeze firmly at the moist delta there.

Kaylee's fingers nimbly began unbuttoning his shirt. Impatient, she parted the fabric and began to tug it down his arms.

He was amused. She'd been awfully eager to get him into these clothes, and now she was just as quick to try and get him out of them. "Awful eager there, ain'tcha?" He lowered his suspenders and obliged by stripping off shirt and undershirt. He rucked her dress up around her waist, tugging impatiently at her panties. "Could it be your last customer left you unsatisfied?"

"Well, my last client, a doctor, was like a cordon bleu meal, while you, you're down-home cooking that sticks to one's ribs. I find I have a craving for a home cooked meal."

Simon paused at that, rearing back and breaking character. Was that what this was about? He wasn't...didn't satisfy her properly?

Kaylee looked up at him confused. "Captain?"

Simon bit his lip unhappily. But if this was what Kaylee needed... He pressed himself to her again, burying his hot face in her neck, his hands squeezing at her breasts, reaching under her panties again to stroke her.

Kaylee knew something was wrong but couldn't put her finger on it. When Simon started stroking her clit, all concern drained out of her and a soft moan escaped her lips.

"I love you," Simon whispered softly, wretchedly, even as he continued stroking her, a little more roughly than he normally would, since plainly whatever he'd been doing...well, whatever he'd been doing before hadn't been quite right.

"I love you too, Simon." Kaylee gasped out as ripples of pleasure radiated from her core.

Simon gave a little moan of pleasure as she said his name, and he pressed his erection against her hip, almost hesitantly, as he continued to tease the pleasure out of her, wanting to feel her come on his hand, for him, wanting to be sure she was ready, that it was him, for him...

"Oh god, Simon." Kaylee moaned as she felt the waves of her orgasm come crashing over her. Her fingernails dug into his arms as her body spasmed and trembled.

He wanted to make her come again, to show her that he could make her feel things that Mal never could, never would, but he couldn't bear to wait. Groaning lightly, he freed himself from the unfamiliar breeches, roughly pushed her panties to one side, and buried himself deep inside her, his face still hidden in her neck as he clung to her as a drowning man to a spar.

"Oh yes!" She gasped as she felt him enter her. The feel of his cock against her walls sent Kaylee off on another orgasm. Her hands dug into Simon's hair to pull his mouth to hers.

He kissed her hard, frantically, needing to make her feel as much as he was. His shoulders were trembling at the intensity of being inside her while he was feeling so...so everything. Then he tore his mouth free and lowered it to her chest, biting at her breasts through the thin material of her dress, wanting to make her cry out for him.

Kaylee mewled as he bit her. The pain/pleasure combination sent waves of delight crashing through her. She'd never known pleasure this intense before and didn't know how to deal with it.

"Kaylee, Kaylee, Kaylee," Simon chanted helplessly as he lost his rhythm, his thrusts hard and awkward as he felt his own climax approaching. He pushed himself up so he could look down at her face as he thrust once or twice more, then spilled inside her, all the tension and fear inside him snapping in the release she brought him.

Kaylee reached the pinnacle of titillation as she felt Simon come within her. Her body jerked in ecstasy, as a scream died in her throat and she passed out.

Simon was drawn to compunction as Kaylee went limp underneath him, and he pulled out more hurriedly than he'd meant to, finding a rag and wetting it in the sink to press against her brow. "Kaylee? Kaylee, are you all right?"

Several minutes passed before her eyelids fluttered weakly and then opened. "Simon?"

"Hey," he said tenderly, running the back of his hand over her cheek. "How do you feel?"

"Shiny. Never had that happen before." Kaylee beamed as she felt residual tremors running through her body.

He kissed her forehead. "I don't think I've ever made it happen either. All the same..." He brushed back her hair from her face. "No more pretending, Kaylee. Just us."

"What do you mean just us? Was there someone here I didn't know about?"

"I don't like thinking I'm not enough for you," Simon confessed softly. "I don't like thinking you want the captain instead."

Kaylee's eyes narrowed as she looked at Simon. "You thought...me and the captain? That's just ... eww. That'd be like you sleeping with River."

Simon's brow furrowed slightly at that. "So you wouldn't mind if I asked you to pretend we were the Captain and River?" he said, lifting an eyebrow.

"Hmm, now THAT would be interesting. I don't think I could bent into all those positions River could, but I'm willing to try." Kaylee giggled.

He smiled, then kissed her lips lightly. "Next time, then. You may as well just ask River for her dress. I'm sure she already knows," he said with a little sigh.

River's voice broke over the comm, "If you borrow my dress, you can keep it."

Simon rolled his eyes. Just had to show off, didn't she? Smoothly, he rolled on his back and smiled at Kaylee. "There, you see? All settled."

Kaylee yawned as she snuggled up to his side. "I'm just gonna take a nap. Someone wore me out."

He just held her close. Maybe, just maybe, this hadn't been such a bad idea after all.