BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - DRAMA

CHILLI

WHO WE ARE (J
Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Just after the events of Serenity, River, Simon and Book all experience different reactions to being onboard the ship... and the events of the previous episode.


CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 2720    RATING: 7    SERIES: FIREFLY

EXT. SPACE

SERENITY cruises past the stars.

INT. SERENITY - MESS QUARTER

Mal, Inara, Jayne, Wash, Zoey and Kaylee eat their meal. Lots of jokes and laughter are evident. We hear none.

INT. SERENITY - CORRIDOR OUTSIDE MESS QUARTER

River stops by the door. She isn't seen. Hides coyly. Ears protrude enough to hear. She smiles slightly.

It soon fades. She turns away from the door. Continues walking.

Her movements have a choreographed, almost balletic quality to them.

She runs her hand along the wall.

FLASH - RAPID FIRE DISTURBING VISION TIME

Just as quickly as it came, it is gone. River stops. Laughs quietly.

Continues walking.

RIVER The walls, they speak to me. Tell me about the past. Little stories they live to weave. None of them make sense. All jumbled together. (cold) The ship is a contradiction.

INT. SERENITY - BOOK'S LIVING QUARTERS

Book sits alone at his desk. Writes something down in a journal. Stood upright is a copy of the Bible - the New Testement.

He sighs. Wipes his brow.

ANGLE ON: JOURNAL

ENTRY 254

It reads as thus:

It has been nary a week since I witnessed the death of an Alliance Official. Every night I'm haunted by what happened... specifically what I did, and what I failed to do.

I am a Religious man. But I also like to think I'm a good man. Choices shouldn't be so black and white for me. I should always strive to do what is right.

But it isn't that simple. It is black and white. Out here, civilisation doesn't hark back to rules or commandmants. It works on what you have, what you don't have, and what you need.

As Darwin once said, it is the "survival of the fittest". To survive, you must do what the the other man, or woman, cannot.

As always, I offer my allegiance Father, but I worry that soon I will have to make a choice I do not want to make.

Book looks up, contemplative.

INT. SERENITY - MEDICAL BAY

Simon is clearing up. The area is a complete mess. Medical supplies and equipment are strewn everywhere.

Still, he tidies. Continues to tidy until it is looking spic and spam.

Simon stares at the Medical Bay. Aside from River, its all he has.

He sits for a while. Thinks.

SIMON (quietly) Did I make the right choice?

He has no answer.

COMMENTS

Saturday, August 28, 2004 7:40 AM

SGTGUMP


Well I do not do well to create so I hate criticizing; the small glimpse into the ship was enjoyable. I especially liked that Book makes a reference to Darwin. There aren't many religious folks who consider Darwinism very good for society, but I think it fits right in with Book's character.

Saturday, August 28, 2004 7:58 AM

MANIACNUMBERONE


Ya gots talent. You describe the characters actions and thoughts very well. I love reading other people's thoughts on Book, since I try to portray him all the time. Keep on keepin' on.

Saturday, August 28, 2004 8:14 AM

CHRONICTHEHEDGEHOG


While it's very good, I think you need to work on the screenplay style. While it is all technically correctYou choose to show things which are unfitting to the medium (long diary entry) and not explain the things that need explaining (do we see River having a vision, if so, this hasn't happened before and we need to know details of what she does. Or do we see what she sees? If we see what she sees, what is she seeing?)

When you're writing screenplay you need to think as visually as possible and give all the detail you can, in the case of River, tell us exactly what is going on.
In the case of Book, maybe have him saying this in a conversation with Inara or even more suitably would be alone and through prayer. Having to read from a diary makes uninteresting TV.


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WHO WE ARE (J
Just after the events of Serenity, River, Simon and Book all experience different reactions to being onboard the ship... and the events of the previous episode.