Jayne couldn’t sleep. By the time he’d gotten to the place they were stayin’ at, everyone had already split up the rooms. He had been left with the room next ta the one Kaylee and the doc was sharin’.

Well. It was supposed ta be Kaylee an’ Inara’s room. The doc was supposed ta be holed up with River across the hall, but that had gone out the window.

Jayne heard a low moan comin’ from the wall.

Either that or things were changin’ more than he thought.

Not that he minded the thought of Kaylee an’ Inara…

Something started thumpin’ against the wall he shared with Kaylee’s room.

Gao yang zhong de gu yang. He was in hell. Whose gorram idea was it to put him in here?

He put a pillow over his head.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

Gave him the creeps to be hearin’ all that as well as he was. Wasn’t that he minded thinkin’ of Kaylee. Frequently did. But… the doc?

Hell no.

He gave up when the thumping got faster and harder.

The hall was empty when he stepped out into it. Still lit, though.

There weren’t no one in the lobby except a clerk, who looked half-asleep.

Strange how little towns like this seemed to fold up after dark. Hardly anyone on the street, even.

‘Cept River. She was sittin’ on the steps of the porch, starin’ at nothin’ in a way that made Jayne almost certain she was starin’ at somethin’.

He watched her for a bit. Looked at the way her skin almost glowed in the lights. The way her back was straight as if she were sittin’ in a throne.

He’d already turned away to go back inside when she spoke up.

“I’ve never heard quiet so loud.”

Jayne turned back around. He looked at her again for a minute, then moved to sit down beside her.

He thought of her hand in his. Linked his fingers together and pretended like he hadn’t.

“Isn’t it past yer bedtime?” He looked in the same direction she was. Weren’t nothin’ there ‘cept an old store, all closed up with a red dress in the window. Kinda purdy.

“Can’t sleep.”

“What’s wrong?” He looked over at her and smirked. “‘Nara snorin’ too loud for ya?”

River turned to him, her eyebrows set in a way that made him sure she was outside for the same reason he was.

Then she turned to look at the window again.

So did he.

“No one can hurt you for hurting.”

He looked back at her. “Huh?”

“Everybody does it. When they lose something. When something that was there isn’t and they can’t seem to remember how to walk.” She turned and looked at him. Her eyes caught the light and held it. Almost like a cat’s.

“It’s okay to cry.”

Jayne reared back. “Cry?” He snorted. Stared at her. She stared back.

He turned away. Felt like she was pokin’ at his brain when she looked at him like that. “I ain’t gonna cry. I ain’t never cried and I got no reason to start now.”

“You don’t have to be wet to cry. Zoe cried dry. Sounded like a laugh. The Captain, too. Cried so hard they laughed.” He could see her rock back in the corner of his eye, arms still around her knees.

Prettiest, craziest rockin’ horse he’d ever seen.

“They didn’t think they’d ever cry, either. Like you. Thought you have to swim around in salt to cry.”

She was looking at him again. He could feel it.

“Can’t help but lose some things. You have to cut the thread, or it takes you with it.”

She was quiet after that.

He glanced at her. She had her head tipped to the side, lookin’ at him.

“Jayne, Jayne. Two of the same. A rock like a stone and warm blood in his veins.” She looked at him with those big eyes and a little smile on her mouth.

Weren’t right for her to look at him that way. Or for him to look at her the way he knew he was.

She got up. He watched her skirt swirl around her shins. Couldn’t look at her face.

She bent down in that way she had and kissed him. Light lips on his temple.

And she was gone.

Jayne let his breath out slow and shifted. Felt better not to hold still. Helped him almost convince himself he wasn’t trying to hold on to that kiss. But he could still feel it, sittin’ quiet-like on his temple, like a hole in his brain.

He shifted again. Mostly to make noise this time.

Then he sat, staring at the window across the way.

***

“River.”

River drifted toward the surface of her dream.

“Meimei.”

She broke the surface as Simon nudged her shoulder.

She opened her eyes.

He was smiling.

“Good morning.”

River sighed and stretched her arms over her head. “Barely.” She sat up and blinked drowsily. The dream was still swimming lazily around the edge of her brain.

It was bright outside. The sun had been up for a long time.

River liked having a sun to tell her that.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothin’s wrong.” Kaylee was there too, smiling.

River yawned. “Then why am I not asleep?”

Simon sat on the edge of her bed.

“Well, it’s after noon. Other than that…”

He smiled. “Happy birthday, meimei.”

Kaylee moved aside so River could see the cake on the table she had been leaning against.

River stared at it.

“Is that mine?”

Kaylee laughed. “Well, I was hopin’ you would share. That’s a real cake over there. Ain’t no pile of protein, like Simon’s was.”

River looked back at Simon, who was grinning at her.

“I forgot.”

Simon reached out a hand and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. “I didn’t.”

He picked up box up off of the floor next to the bed and handed it to her.

She took it, holding it carefully in her hands.

She looked back up at him. “Thank you.”

Kaylee came over and put her hand on Simon’s shoulder. “Well, open it! At least pretend you don’t know what it is.”

She crouched down next to the bed.

River felt herself smiling as she pulled the lid of the box off.

A wooden comb was lying on a pile of crushed tissue paper. There was a red lacquer rose standing out on the bridge of the comb, its petals delicately curved outward.

“Ooooh.”

River heard Kaylee’s sigh of admiration as she reached out to touch the rose. It was cool under her fingertips.

“That’s even prettier than anythin’ ‘Nara’s got.”

Simon was pleased.

River looked at him as Kaylee nudged his shoulder. “Can’t believe you picked that out yerself.”

“Thank you.” River wished she knew something else to say.

Kaylee got up, shaking the bed as she climbed onto it and crawled behind River.

River closed her eyes as Kaylee combed her fingers through her hair, easing the tangles out. She felt the rush of cool air as Kaylee lifted her hair off of her neck and twisted it up.

Kaylee reached over her shoulder to puck the comb up out of the box with reverent fingers.

River felt the teeth of the comb drag lines across her scalp as Kaylee slid it into place, securing her hair.

She blushed as Simon smiled at her.

“You look beautiful.” He made a play-angry face and tugged on a curl that must have escaped Kaylee’s attention. “I don’t know if I like it.”

Kaylee peered at her from over Simon’s shoulder.

“Ai ya. We’re gonna have ta beat the men away.” She grinned. “I never knew what a beautiful woman was hidin’ under all that hair.”

Woman. When had that happened? A few hours ago she had been a girl. She didn’t remember changing. Her skin still felt the same.

She was staring at her hands, trying to figure them out, when Kaylee put a piece of cake in them.

“Cake, River! Sugar! Butter!” Kaylee’s mouth was full by the last syllable. She sighed audibly and River could feel a wave of pleasure come from her. “Gorram. This is the best birthday ever. And it ain’t even mine.”

River laughed. She wondered if that had changed. Her laugh.

She decided to stop wondering.

There was a knock at the door.

“Gorram vultures. They can smell it a mile away.” But Kaylee was smiling when she went to open the door.

It was the Captain.

“Well?” Kaylee kept her hand on the door, looking sternly at the Captain. “Let’s have it. You’ve come ta take our fun away, haven’t you?”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” He looked at the cake in Kaylee’s hand. “But I also wouldn’t say no to a piece of it, either.” He turned his eyes on River and smiled. “If the birthday girl doesn’t mind sharing, of course.”

River smiled and nodded, unwilling to open her mouth and risk losing a grain of sugar.

“I come bearing gifts.” He came fully into the room. River could see a big box in his hands. He moved toward River and held it out to her. “Not my gift. Someone else’s. It was left for you at the desk without a name. I looked in it, of course. Just ta make sure it weren’t deadly er nothin’.” He leaned against the table the cake was sitting on. “I must say I wouldn’t mind claimin’ it was from me, if you didn’t already know it wasn’t.”

River could barely hear him. She was staring at the box in her lap.

Kaylee dropped onto the bed next to her. “C’mon, c’mon. Open it!”

River put her hands on the lid of the box. Left them there for a minute. Then she opened it carefully. Reverently. She set the lid on the bed beside her and pushed the layers of tissue paper aside.

The sun fell across her lap at the perfect angle, making the red satin glow like coals.