He heard her before he saw her. Felt her even before that.

“Go away.”

He took a drink from his flask as a pair of dusty boots appeared next to him.

“I’m sorry.”

He didn’t respond. Kept lookin’ straight ahead.

His throat hurt every time he swallowed. His leg throbbed. He’d walked out of town. Opposite direction of Dallin’s house. He’d stopped when his leg hurt so bad he couldn’t stand it no more.

He hurt.

It hurt that she’d let them do that to him.

Hurt worse that she’d let him leave.

River’s back. Hair swingin’.

Guess he’d deserved to be hurt.

“Where are you going?”

She dropped down next to him, tucking her arms under her knees.

He took another drink.

“I ain’t goin’ nowhere. Ain’t got nowhere to go.” He turned his head to look at her. “But I sure as hell ain’t getting’ back on that boat.”

Jayne stood. Tried not to wince. Tried not to limp as he walked away. Couldn’t sit still next to her.

He could hear River trottin’ after him.

“Can’t jump ship now. Yo ho, yo ho.”

Jayne shot her a look over his shoulder.

She shrugged.

Jayne grunted.

“Well I ain’t gonna stay where I ain’t welcome.”

“It’s all pretend. They were scared. They have nothing to do, so they worry. Worry worry. All of them.”

Jayne took another drink.

“They worry about me. They worry about you. They worry so they won’t have to worry.”

Jayne turned on his heel, facing her. “But there ain’t nothin’ to gorram worry about!” He looked at her and she looked back. She didn’t have to say nothin’. He turned away again. Picked up his speed best he could so she would let him alone.

She kept up with him. But she didn’t say more.

Didn’t matter. Nothin’ she coulda said would convince him to get back on that boat. He wasn’t going back. He was fed up with Mal. Fed up with his pickin’ and bossin’ and accusin’. Fed up with always gettin’ blamed and always bein’ watched. Fed up with bein’ mean and stupid and not more th’n muscle.

His throat ached.

“You are more.”

He stopped, turnin’ on her again. “How would you know? You don’t know nothin’ about me.”

She looked up at him all calm-like.

He glared at her. Glared into those big, calm eyes and wanted to hate her for knowin’. For bein’ right. For seein’ it.

But he couldn’t.

He hated that most of all.

He turned away again like he could put distance between them. But she kept up with him.

She left him in peace for a bit.

It was hard to breathe, with his throat all tight like it was. Not just from Mal, neither.

“It’s not your fault.”

He wheeled on her, somethin’ in him flaring.

“No. It ain’t. It’s yours.”

The bare, flat look in her eyes was worse than if she had cried.

Jayne stared hard at her, clenching his jaw. “It was you. You muddied everythin’ up. Churned it all up with yer… with… everythin’. I was fine. Fit. And then you decided ta…”

He towered over her. “You came inta my bunk. You… you…” He threw his hands into the air. “You changed everythin’.”

He growled. Walked past her, his arm bumping her shoulder.

Her voice was quiet-like.

“You asked me to dance.”

He turned. She had turned to him, looking small. Wasn’t right for her to be lookin’ so vulnerable. So tiny. Her hair all mussed up and her face still pink from cryin’. The bruise still dark on her cheek.

He grit his teeth. “Yeah. But that was only after-“

“Before.” She shook her head. “Before. At night and when you weren’t trying not to.

“And I danced for you. I fell even before I took your hand. And last night you caught me.”

She smiled.

Damn near broke his heart.

He looked into her big, dark eyes. He was drowning.

“River, I… You’re… gorramit, girl.” His voice was softer than he’d meant it to be. “You’re just a kid.”

She smiled as she moved toward him.

She took his hand and moved closer. Put it on the small of her back.

Strange, how small she was. How his hand seemed to take up her whole back.

She tipped her head back, looking up at him all pretty-like.

Jayne lifted a hand. Brushed his fingers softly along her bruise.

She trailed her own fingers along his jaw. Down his throat, where Mal’s fingerprints still stung. “Thank you for catching me.”

Her other hand slid up his arm, leaving his skin tingling in its wake. Her fingertips rested on his shoulder. Almost too light to feel.

She smiled. Lifted up on her toes, pressing the length of herself against him.

“Little girl.” His voice was husky. His body ached. It was hard to breathe, with her so close. With the warmth of her against him. “You’re playin’ with fire.”

He slipped his hand behind her neck, winding his fingers into her dark hair.

She put her fingers on his jaw. Pulled his face down to meet hers.

Her lips were sweet. Dusty. Sunny. Worth having.

He pressed his hand into her back evenly, letting his lips taste her. Letting her taste him. Letting his brain stop and his belly burn.

She pulled away too soon. Her eyes were half-closed. Dark. Satisfied.

Her lips were still close. Close enough for him to feel them move as she whispered.

“But it feels so good to be warm for once.”

She closed the space of breath between them.

And they burned.