Shiny New Toys 13: Culminations
Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Kaylee starts to tell a story, and Simon rewrites the ending. (NC-17, at least for the end! I did it!)


A/N: Not mine, just playing (and boy, are they playing this time).

Well, there's porn, but not great porn. This is my first attempt at it, and it was a lot harder than I thought (four beers helped, though, so if you see any typos, blame it on the Fat Tire Amber Ale). I seem to have trouble writing descriptions of some things - it actually embarasses me (I guess I got some Simon in me somewhere). It's also hard to go smoothly from "I love you - no, I love you!" to "OK, everybody get naked!", so if that seems jarring, I apologize.

All you NC-17 maestros out there, let me know how to make this better! But I'll probably never manage to cut out the cutesy dialog, just because I honestly think that they'd trade goofy endearments and a bit of snark, no matter what.


"Knock, knock, Simon."

He looked up and smiled, setting his book aside. "Ching jin, bao bei."

Kaylee smiled outwardly, but inside she got all mushy. Bao bei. Precious. Just like Inara said. "You readin'?"

"A bit. River suggested this one. She always liked me to read her stories, and she seems to still prefer the depressing or gross ones. Orwell, Poe, Dostoyevsky. But you know what her favorite was?" Kaylee shook her head, coming over to sit next to him, watching with fascination as his eyes lit up while he remembered. "She liked it best when I made up my own stories, especially the ones about the dinosaurs turning on their masters and eating all the filthy non-Alliance scum." He turned thoughtful, coming back to the present and looking around the bunk and thinking of the ship beyond, before looking back at her. "Seems like it's a good thing for us that the dinos missed a few." He shook off the pensive mood and smiled as her hair waved a bit and he caught sight of her ear. "I see you found something in with your tools."

"Aha! It was you! Thank you, Simon, they're beautiful."

"You're welcome. I was going to give them to you earlier, but....well. I'm glad you like them."

She sidled a little closer to him, gently putting one hand over his and bringing their faces inches apart. "So, do I get a story from ya, too?"

"Hmmm. I could, but it seems to me I just told you one. Why don't you get comfortable and make up one for me?" He scooted over on the bed, and she quickly laid down and claimed half of it, propping up her head and looking him over. Excellent, he was already in his pajamas. Neither one of them gave a thought to her greasy coveralls.

"'K. Lemme think a minute." Her face screwed up in thought a bit before she continued. "Once upon a time, there was this really shiny doctor."

"Doctor, huh?" Simon grinned and raised his eyebrows.

"Shush. I'm tellin' this story. Anyway, he an' his sister ended up on this ship. It was the nicest ship in the 'verse, an' had the best mechanic in the 'verse on it. An' the crew of the ship didn't trust that doctor at first, but she did. An' they got sad an' mad with each other sometimes, 'cause people do that, but they was really good friends after a while."

"Hey, I think I know this one." Simon couldn't resist teasing a bit. He started rubbing his thumb on the back of her hand.

An' the mechanic?" Kaylee was starting to get caught up in her own story, all of her conversation with Inara still floating around in the back of her head. Not to mention that he was touching her and breaking her concentration. "She kinda liked this doctor some - OK, more than some - 'cause...." Gorramit, she was losing her place again, and if he kept rubbing her hand like that she was just going to pop. The words started pouring out. "'Cause he was real swai an' nice an' funny an' smart an' has real soft hands an' you give great backrubs an' when you grin it's''....I love you!" Kaylee slapped her hand over her mouth. That last part wasn't supposed to slip out.

Simon's eyes got very wide and his mouth popped open as he quickly sat up. "Shen me?"

She sat up too, completely horrified and now quite sure than Inara was wrong and he'd get all stiff and ask her to leave. "Oh, God! I'm sorry! Don't be mad! Should I take that back?"

Simon kept his voice carefully neutral, some part of his brain telling him things just got very serious and that if he blew it this time he'd never see her again. "Do you want to?"

"No. I know I ain't got a right to say it,'s true, ya know." Simon's face was inscrutable. She hung her head and made to get up, feeling miserable as all her hopes for romance dried up in an instant. "I should go, 'cause now things is all uncomfortable an' you probably don't want me around no more, which I get, of course, so - "

He grabbed her hands again. "Kaylee. No, stay here, xing gan, stop." He gathered her up into his lap and hugged her tight. And for the first time, he kissed her for real. Not playful or flirtatious, not a quick peck designed to shut him up, just soft and slow, one hand on her neck and the other on her back to support her. He finally broke off and stared at her, her faced flushed and her hair once again disturbed. "I'm glad you told me. I love you, too." She sighed and put her head on his shoulder. They just sat there a moment, basking in the glow, until Simon started laughing, reaching up to touch his lip. "Although I think I swallowed some engine grease there."

She laughed along with him for a moment, feeling all manner of giddy, then put her hands firmly on his shoulders and got nose to nose with him. "Best get used to it. I ain't lettin' go any time soon, doctor. The grease just likes to follow me 'round."

Simon grinned as he saw her face up close. "Indeed it does. You have a spot of it right" - he lightly bopped her on her nose - "there." He leaned back a moment to take in her attire, for the first time noticing her coveralls. "And everywhere else, it appears. Hang on." He grabbed a tissue from a box on his nightstand and scrubbed her nose for a moment, then dropped a kiss on it. "Much better."

"Gonna take all night with a tissue. Lemme help." Romantic crisis averted, Kaylee's mind naturally turned to the other things lovers could get up to. She slowly got out of bed, and turning with her best dramatic flair, walked back to the door and shut it, making sure the lock was turned tight - it wouldn't do to have River wander in. Still facing the door, she unzipped her coveralls and pulled them down to her waist, then stripped her shirt off and used it to finish cleaning her face. Turning around and leaning against the door, she stood before Simon, naked to the waist. "How 'bout that? Cleaner, now?"

Simon's eyes were as big as saucers. Sure, she'd stripped down in front of him a few days ago, but he'd had a hangover then, and his eyes weren't working so well. Now his eyes were working just fine, and he had to make a concerted effort to swallow as he stared at every curve. "Yeah," he managed to breathe, before blushing and quickly grabbing a pillow to put it in his lap. Apparently not just his eyes were working better this evening.

Kaylee sauntered back over to the bed, sitting down and unlacing her boots, kicking them into a corner with a thud. "Now, doctor, let's be fair 'bout this.," she told him, straddling his waist while he sat there, still stunned. She pushed into him a little and grinned as he closed his eyes and caught his breath. Simon may be all fancible and could talk all pretty, but when it came to the nakedness, Kaylee was in charge. "Ain't right I'm gettin' all cold here an' you're still bundled up." She slid one hand up the inside of his shirt, grazing his ribs with her fingernails.

For once in his life, Simon didn't have a witticism to offer. He just quickly peeled his shirt off and grabbed her, pressing her against him as he kissed her with all the passion he could manage. "No grease in the bed!," he gasped out, before grabbing her again and running his fingers into her hair, all of Inara's careful work destroyed in an instant.

Kaylee giggled again and obligingly pulled away, rolling onto her back and arching to get the coveralls off. She flung them towards the foot of the bed, giving herself a small cheer when they landed right in his laundry basket. Standing up and giving him a twirl, now clad only in her underwear, she held her arms out for Simon to check over. "Do I pass inspection, Dr. Tam?"

Apparently not convinced, Simon decided a much more thorough inspection was in order. He reached out and trailed a hand from her neck all the way down her hip, leaving goose bumps in his wake while pulling her back onto the bed. "Meili", he told her, dropping his head to lightly kiss - and taking a cue from her this morning, nibble at - her collarbone. She hissed and squirmed, hands going into his hair as he worked his way down her arm and ended by sucking her fingers, not even caring about the grease she invariably had under her nails. She cracked one eye open when she felt him sit back again. He was looking at her with the cutest grin she'd ever seen. "You're pretty....pretty. Did I get that right this time?" She laughed and playfully whapped him on the shoulder, pushing him down as she knelt next to him.

Kaylee was in awe as she looked him over. She didn't know how he did it - boxes of Band-Aids weren't that heavy, and she'd never seen him exercising with Jayne - but damned if he didn't have muscles everywhere. His skin was pale white, like fine China, with almost no blemishes she could see. For a girl from a planet where everyone had leathery skin from long hours in the sun, Simon was an exotic creature from a fairy tale, and that made him all kinds of sexy. She started kissing her way down his chest, stopping briefly to tease with her tongue when he gasped. She got all the way down to his pajama bottoms and looked up, waiting for his eyes to open again so she could stare at him lustfully.

"Hmmm. I always wondered what kinda undies a Core doctor would wear. You got any idea?" She tossed the pillow aside, grabbed the waistband of his pajama bottoms and yanked, disposing of them in one smooth move. Her face nearly ended up in his lap, and she raised an eyebrow at him. "White boxers, I shoulda known." Pants disposed of, she climbed on top of him and laid down across his chest, coming down for a soft kiss.

"Hi". Simon stared into her eyes as he put a hand on her lower back, pressing her into him. "How are you doing?" He started rubbing, putting light pressure on her tailbone. She groaned and sunk her head down onto the pillow next to him, grinding in rhythm with his pressing.

"Shiny, Simon. Can we....?" She never managed to get the rest of the sentence out as he brought the hand on her back around the side of her body, gently stroking her through her underwear. She shuddered and bucked, pressing her face into his shoulder.

"We can, but hang on." He withdrew his hand and she brought her head up to look in his eyes. "This changes everything, Kaylee. It's not a romp in the engine room, not to me. Can you handle being stuck with me for a while?"

Her only response was a happy sigh. "Simon, I've been waitin' for you for months now. I already told you I love you. Now shut up." She leaned back down, cutting off his "I love you, too" with a kiss, this one hungrier than the others, begging him to lose the manners and be with her. He seemed to agree, grabbing her panties and trying to jerk them off of her, which of course didn't work since she was still mashed against him.

Kaylee giggled at him and sat up again, rolling off him for a second while she took care of her underwear, then giving him a questioning look. At his frantic nod, she got rid of his clothes, too, then rolled back on top, feeling him press against her center. They both moaned and she considered teasing him a bit, just for the fun of it, but as soon as he pushed against her a bit harder, she couldn't take it. She had to have him now.

Simon was holding his breath, watching her sit up and grasp him, guiding him into her as she slowly sat down. Kaylee whimpered, eyes closed and panting as she settled on top of him. His breath exploded from his lungs as she started to rock slowly, her eyes locked on his face and grinning at his expression.

That grin faded quickly when he put his hands back on her hips, pressing her down and pushing up. He could tell she was already close, her breath coming out in short gasps, and each thrust making her mewl softly. He took one hand off her hip and put it between their bodies, stroking her softly. She bucked, trying hard to hang on, but eventually giving in and arching her back as she came. The sight of her proved too much for him, and he groaned as he let go as well, whispering that he loved her.

They eventually collapsed back into the bed, kissing softly and pushing sweaty hair out of their eyes. "Well? How'd I do?," he teased. Simon was a perfectionist at heart, and couldn't help asking for her opinion on a job well done.

"Oh, you made me all sleepy. I'd say between that an' the ear thing, I may never leave this room." Kaylee giggled, eyes feeling droopy, happy and sated and so, so glad she managed to wait for this doctor to come around to her. She'd have all kinds of gossip for Inara tomorrow.

Simon hugged her before reaching over to turn off the light. "Fine with me, bao bei. Sleep tight."


Wednesday, January 11, 2006 4:50 PM


You done good! Nothin' to be ashamed of with that sex scene. I like how you managed it without using words for the pertinent body parts. Sexier that way. *g*

It was a nice culmination for this story, but does that mean it's the end? Seems logical, but I may be wrong.

You can be sure that I, for one, will continue to read your stories!

"I love my captain."

Wednesday, January 11, 2006 4:58 PM


Great way to end the story.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006 5:05 PM


Sorry, it occurs to me I should have been more specific. "Culminations" referred to the massive UST we've had running around. This isn't the end; I think I got one more chapter in me. I can't leave it without a bad joke at the end.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006 6:06 PM


I'll be the second to say thank you for not putting in body part descriptions. The stories are always much better when you avoid the usual "porn" terms. So thanx. And *please* don't let it be the end, I think you could manage to get more than just one more chapter out ;) I believe in you.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006 6:31 PM


Just me again to say glad to know this isn't the end! Keep 'em (oh, eh, you know what I was gonna say, but, eh, no, better not). *g*

Looking forward to the next chapter!

"I love my captain."

Wednesday, January 11, 2006 7:01 PM


Well, there's porn, but not great porn.

Even when it's's good.

Nicely done.

Wednesday, January 11, 2006 10:58 PM


You did good! I totally get all blushy when I read Nc-17, can't imagine how red you get writing it. Can't wait for your next post and I totally loved how Kaylee popped out the "I love you".

Thursday, January 12, 2006 2:58 PM


You've done an excellent job of your writing a S/K fic that is while highly intimate, not a vehicle for sex scenes.

This most recent chapter continues in this trend. Your over-riding theme is the intimacy of their relationship, not the sex. This time around, there happended to be sex instead of gunplay.

Saturday, January 14, 2006 7:17 PM


Finally had a minute to sit down and review this, and...dang. My off-white butt you don't have any smut-writing skills, I thought you did just fine ;)

Sunday, January 15, 2006 6:31 AM


what, no dinosaurs?


Wednesday, January 18, 2006 5:24 PM


'I think I swallowed some engine grease' Lmas
Great job, don't doubt yourself

Tuesday, October 3, 2006 1:28 PM


Ohh, this was nice, sweet and sensual. Definitely a wonderful way to consumate their relationship. I tend to get my awkward moments out of the way before sex, but their moments here were endearing anyway :)


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In The Ether 13: Secret Agent Man
Simon takes a turn at super spy as the crew tracks him down.

In The Ether 12: Motivations
A brief history of Simon Tam

In The Ether 11: Telling
Simon and Regan tell each other off, Jayne tells Kaylee a little story, and Wash tells everybody about basic chemistry. Bonus: Jayne actually quotes Shakespeare! Kind of.

In The Ether 10: Technical Difficulties
Jayne goes trophy hunting, Kaylee and Wash attempt to explain technical things to Mal, and eventually everyone realizes that they left something at the last stop.

Generic S/K Plot Outline
Inspired by a story posted at, I present the outline of pretty much every S/K fic out there (including my own, so no one take it personal-like).

Dino Tales: Loss
The dino army mourns the loss of one of their own.

The Old Switcheroo
Jayne and Simon wake up with unique perspectives on life.

In The Ether 9: Minor Complications
Jake and Jasper check out Serenity, River secures some backup, Jayne discovers his protective side, Simon gets physical, and Kaylee meets an old flame.

In The Ether 8: Lady's Choice
Zoe fixes the plan. Kaylee shows Simon how to turn up the heat.

In The Ether 7: Shore Leave
Mal gives everyone a day on Belix to calm the nerves. Wash gets suspicious. A plan is hatched.