Kaylee lay upon her bunk, blood dripping out of the open wound on her neck. That blood was on the floor. That blood was on Simons hands. He looked down confusedly at his blood stained hands and fingers. His left hand held a knife. The scar on his palm hurt, it throbbed in pain as it lay drenched in the blood of his life and lover, a scarlet ribbon against a backdrop of a red sea. That blood dripped off his palms, and off the knife which had rent Kaylees tender flesh. No, no, it can’t be. He would never do this, never… “Are you so sure, son?” Shepard Book was in the doorway, blocking Simons only escape. “Are you so sure? Maybe the old you would not do something like this, but the new you…the new you is just that. The new you might just do this. That’s why we are here, to help you in your time of trial.” “What trial?” Simon shouted at the old man. “What is all this?!?!” “Exactly what it appears to be.” Book frowned at Simon, and that simple gesture held all the pity, anger, and hate of a hundred worlds and a trillion lives. Simon fell to the floor on his knees, hands covering his ears, drowning out the silent accusations with a red tide of love and fear. *** “Simon?” Kaylee lay over him, a concerned look on her normally cheery face. “Simon, you alrigh’?” A dream. Just a gorram crazy dream that don’t mean a damn thing. He sighed in relief. “Its nothing, xin gan. Just a nightmare.” She giggled, looking where he had made a tall ten inch pyramid where his legs met with the blanket. “Some nightmare, huh?” Simon grinned at her. “Must have had a good dream before it.” She sensuously slid onto him, over him. “Like this?” Simon groaned into her hair. “Not half so good.” *** Serenity drifted out in the black, an hour from breaking atom on Ariel. River sat in the pilots chair, Wash’s dinosaurs guarding it as always. Mal stood behind her, watching the glassy grey orb of storms that wove in and out of Ariel’s cloud cover. “Call the crew, tell’m ta meet in the dinin’ room for a bit of a conference.” “Can’t, they’re busy right now.” Mal groaned. He knew exactly who she was speaking about. Worse, he knew what she was speaking of. “Ooh,” said River, “I didn’t think Kaylee could even bend that way!” “Must you give me a gorram play-by-play?!?! Or even tell me about it at all!?!?!” River flicked the three magic switches, before replying, “As to the latter, yes, you really do need to know. As to the former…I just like to make you squirm a bit. And speaking of squirming-“ “I have to go see Zoë!” Mal rushed out of the cockpit with some rather disturbing images in his brainpan. *** Mal found Zoë in the kitchen, servicing her sawed-off. Mal made sure to knock before entering, as trying to sneak up on Zoë would usually earn you a bullet for your troubles. “Um, hello, Zoë, uh, mind if I ask ya a question?”

“Shoot, sir.” She didn’t look up. “Yeah, well, uh…why’d ya do it? Chang, I mean. I know he was a piece of fei hua, but…jeez, you just…boom…blown away his manhood.” He gulped. “Seems a mite…below the belt, if ya ask me.” Zoë finally looked up from her work. “Well, sir, its simple. So what if it was? All I know is this, sir: I done seen far too many families broke apart, mine included. And if that spineless hundan can go ‘bout destroyin’ families like Billy’s…well, at least I can make it so that he can’t make any more bastards of his own.” With a flourish, she snapped her gun shut, then tromped out of the room, leaving behind a very thankful Mal. Thankful, that is, that he had Zoë’s undying loyalty. River poked her head out the door. “You can call an assembly now, they’re done!” *** Simon stumbled through the hall, bumping into walls in his blindness. The lights were out, Hell knows why. He was still glowing a bit from the backwash of lust. He had left Kaylee to sleep off her exhaustion. Hell, least he knew why she was tired… He bumped into something warm and soft. “Just open your eyes to see, Simon.” Judging by voice and riddle, it was River. And, he had, indeed, had his eyes closed. He opened them to reveal River, staring curiously at his scar, tracing her finger down the scar, chanting dirge like under her breath, “And as long as we live, every scar is a bridge to someone’s broken heart.” “River?” She looked at him. “Now you know. What its like to not know if what you’re seeing is real or not. Its enough to make you go crazy all over again. Hello Wash, Book.” Simon turned, and there were the two specters waving at his sister. “Hello, River. Still afraid of my hair?” “What hair?” she asked innocently. “Now I know I’ve gone crazy,” muttered Simon. “Yes, you have,” said Wash. “Why do ya think we’re here? To help you remember your medical jargon?” “Wash is right, Simon. You have to fight it, or you’ll be lost forever. Kaylee will be lost. If anything, fight it for her.” Simon clutched her shoulders, and knelt down so that he was at eye level with her. “I’m not going anywhere, mei-mei.” Then he saw it. Behind the mask. The fear. The fear she harbored for him. Two sides of him warred on over to use it against her, or to assuage her fears. With a huge sob, River ripped herself free of his embrace and ran off to the cockpit.