REAL WORLD EVENT DISCUSSIONS

Top Ten Ways to Destroy the Earth...

POSTED BY: HERO
UPDATED: Tuesday, January 29, 2008 15:29
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Monday, January 28, 2008 6:13 AM

HERO


Found this article online...

10:
Quote:


Total existence failure
You will need: nothing

Method: No method. Simply sit back and twiddle your thumbs as, completely by chance, all 200,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 atoms making up the planet Earth suddenly, simultaneously and spontaneously cease to exist. Note: the odds against this actually ever occurring are considerably greater than a googolplex to one. Failing this, some kind of arcane (read: scientifically laughable) probability-manipulation device may be employed.


Oddly, this is also my plan to stop Ron Paul from winning the Republican nomination.

9:
Quote:


Gobbled up by strangelets
You will need: a stable strangelet

Method: Hijack control of the Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider in Brookhaven National Laboratory, Long Island, New York. Use the RHIC to create and maintain a stable strangelet. Keep it stable for as long as it takes to absorb the entire Earth into a mass of strange quarks. Keeping the strangelet stable is incredibly difficult once it has absorbed the stabilizing machinery, but creative solutions may be possible.

A while back, there was some media hoo-hah about the possibility of this actually happening at the RHIC, but in actuality the chances of a stable strangelet forming are pretty much zero.

Earth's final resting place: a huge glob of strange matter


Oddly this is what happened to the people who voted for Ron Paul in the New Hampshire Primary.

H


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Monday, January 28, 2008 6:19 AM

HERO


8:
Quote:


Sucked into a microscopic black hole
You will need: a microscopic black hole. Note that black holes are not eternal, they evaporate due to Hawking radiation. For your average black hole this takes an unimaginable amount of time, but for really small ones it could happen almost instantaneously, as evaporation time is dependent on mass. Therefore you microscopic black hole must have greater than a certain threshold mass, roughly equal to the mass of Mount Everest. Creating a microscopic black hole is tricky, since one needs a reasonable amount of neutronium, but may possibly be achievable by jamming large numbers of atomic nuclei together until they stick. This is left as an exercise to the reader.

Method: simply place your black hole on the surface of the Earth and wait. Black holes are of such high density that they pass through ordinary matter like a stone through the air. The black hole will plummet through the ground, eating its way to the center of the Earth and all the way through to the other side: then, it'll oscillate back, over and over like a matter-absorbing pendulum. Eventually it will come to rest at the core, having absorbed enough matter to slow it down. Then you just need to wait, while it sits and consumes matter until the whole Earth is gone.

Highly, highly unlikely. But not impossible.

Earth's final resting place: a singularity of almost zero size, which will then proceed to happily orbit the Sun as normal.


Ironically, Ron Paul's chances of being elected President may in fact constitute a singularity of almost zero size...Homeland Security is monitoring the situation.

7:
Quote:


Blown up by matter/antimatter reaction
You will need: 2,500,000,000,000 tons of antimatter

Antimatter - the most explosive substance possible - can be manufactured in small quantities using any large particle accelerator, but this will take some considerable time to produce the required amounts. If you can create the appropriate machinery, it may be possible - and much easier - simply to "flip" 2.5 trillion tons of matter through a fourth dimension, turning it all to antimatter at once.

Method: This method involves detonating a bomb so big that it blasts the Earth to pieces.

How hard is that?

The gravitational binding energy of a planet of mass M and radius R is - if you do the lengthy calculations - given by the formula E=(3/5)GM^2/R. For Earth, that works out to roughly 224,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Joules. The Sun takes nearly a WEEK to output that much energy. Think about THAT.

To liberate that much energy requires the complete annihilation of around 2,500,000,000,000 tonnes of antimatter. That's assuming zero energy loss to heat and radiation, which is unlikely to be the case in reality: You'll probably need to up the dose by at least a factor of ten. Once you've generated your antimatter, probably in space, just launch it en masse towards Earth. The resulting release of energy (obeying Einstein's famous mass-energy equation, E=mc^2) should be sufficient to split the Earth into a thousand pieces.

Earth's final resting place: A second asteroid belt around the Sun.

Earliest feasible completion date: AD 2500. Of course, if it does prove possible to manufacture antimatter in the sufficiently large quantities you require - which is not necessarily the case - then smaller antimatter bombs will be around long before then.


Scientists at MIT believe that this very nearly occurred at a recent campaign event when former Democratic Presidential Candidate Dennis Kucinich shook hands with Republican Candidate Ron Paul. In that instant there existed a political bomb so big it could blow the earth to pieces...thankfully the moment passed without incident.

H

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Monday, January 28, 2008 8:15 AM

HERO


6:
Quote:


Destroyed by vacuum energy detonation
You will need: a light bulb

Method: This is a fun one. Contemporary scientific theories tell us that what we may see as vacuum is only vacuum on average, and actually thriving with vast amounts of particles and antiparticles constantly appearing and then annihilating each other. It also suggests that the volume of space enclosed by a light bulb contains enough vacuum energy to boil every ocean in the world. Therefore, vacuum energy could prove to be the most abundant energy source of any kind. Which is where you come in. All you need to do is figure out how to extract this energy and harness it in some kind of power plant - this can easily be done without arousing too much suspicion - then surreptitiously allow the reaction to run out of control. The resulting release of energy would easily be enough to annihilate all of planet Earth and probably the Sun too.

Slightly possible.

Earth's final resting place: a rapidly expanding cloud of particles of varying size.


In fact many have theorized that there is enough vaccum energy in Ron Paul's empty brain to power 10 Big Bangs and a couple small one's left over. However, this method of destruction is extremely unlikely as it would require a light bulb going on in Ron Paul's head which, given his complete lack of intelligent thought, is simply beyond current physics.

5:
Quote:


Sucked into a giant black hole
You will need: a black hole, extremely powerful rocket engines, and, optionally, a large rocky planetary body. The nearest black hole to our planet is 1600 light years from Earth in the direction of Sagittarius, orbiting V4641.

Method: after locating your black hole, you need get it and the Earth together. This is likely to be the most time-consuming part of this plan. There are two methods, moving Earth or moving the black hole, though for best results you'd most likely move both at once.

Very difficult, but definitely possible.

Earth's final resting place: part of the mass of the black hole.


While it may be difficult getting the Earth to a Black Hole, many scientists are concerned about the black hole being created unintentionally here on Earth. In fact some say we can see the effects of an already existing black hole by observing the flow of campaign contributions to the Ron Paul Campaign.

H

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Monday, January 28, 2008 10:03 AM

HERO


4:
Quote:


Meticulously and systematically deconstructed
You will need: a powerful mass driver, or ideally lots of them; ready access to roughly 2*10^32J

Method: Basically, what we're going to do here is dig up the Earth, a big chunk at a time, and boost the whole lot of it into orbit. Yes. All six sextillion tons of it. A mass driver is a sort of oversized electromagnetic railgun, which was once proposed as a way of getting mined materials back from the Moon to Earth - basically, you just load it into the driver and fire it upwards in roughly the right direction. We'd use a particularly powerful model - big enough to hit escape velocity of 11 kilometers per second even after atmospheric considerations - and launch it all into the Sun or randomly into space.

Alternate methods for boosting the material into space include loading the extracted material into space shuttles or taking it up via space elevator. All these methods, however, require a - let me emphasize this - titanic quantity of energy to carry out. Building a Dyson sphere ain't gonna cut it here. (Note: Actually, it would. But if you have the technology to build a Dyson sphere, why are you reading this?) See No. 6 for a possible solution.

If we wanted to and were willing to devote resources to it, we could start this process RIGHT NOW. Indeed, what with all the gunk left in orbit, on the Moon and heading out into space, we already have done.

Earth's final resting place: Many tiny pieces, some dropped into the Sun, the remainder scattered across the rest of the Solar System.

Earliest feasible completion date: Ah. Yes. At a billion tons of mass driven out of the Earth's gravity well per second: 189,000,000 years.



This method of destruction was devised from careful analysis of Republican Candidate Ron Paul's economic plan.


3:
Quote:


Pulverized by impact with blunt instrument
You will need: a big heavy rock, something with a bit of a swing to it... perhaps Mars

Method: Essentially, anything can be destroyed if you hit it hard enough. ANYTHING. The concept is simple: find a really, really big asteroid or planet, accelerate it up to some dazzling speed, and smash it into Earth, preferably head-on but whatever you can manage. The result: an absolutely spectacular collision, resulting hopefully in Earth (and, most likely, our "cue ball" too) being pulverized out of existence - smashed into any number of large pieces which if the collision is hard enough should have enough energy to overcome their mutual gravity and drift away forever, never to coagulate back into a planet again.

A brief analysis of the size of the object required can be found here. Falling at the minimal impact velocity of 11 kilometers per second and assuming zero energy loss to heat and other energy forms, the cue ball would have to have roughly 60% of the mass of the Earth. Mars, the next planet out, "weighs" in at about 11% of Earth's mass, while Venus, the next planet in and also the nearest to Earth, has about 81%. Assuming that we would fire our cue ball into Earth at much greater than 11km/s (I'm thinking more like 50km/s), either of these would make great possibilities.

Obviously a smaller rock would do the job, you just need to fire it faster. A 10,000,000,000,000-tonne asteroid at 90% of light speed would do just as well. See the Guide to moving Earth for useful information on maneuvering big hunks of rock across interplanetary distances.

Pretty plausible.

Earth's final resting place: a variety of roughly Moon-sized chunks of rock, scattered haphazardly across the greater Solar System.

Earliest feasible completion date: AD 2500, maybe?



A highly trained team of phychoanalysts have been studying the thought process of Ron Paul supporters and determined that nearly all of them had been struck by blunt instruments...often big, heavy rocks. While it is plausable that a large enough blunt impact could shatter the Earth, it is proven fact that it can shatter common sense.

H

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Monday, January 28, 2008 1:13 PM

KIRKULES


Quote:

Originally posted by Hero:


Method: Essentially, anything can be destroyed if you hit it hard enough. ANYTHING.



Chuck Norris?

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Monday, January 28, 2008 4:12 PM

ALLIETHORN7


Chuck Norris doesn't count. That much awesome can NOT be broken!!!

-Danny

and every time I play with passion I start breaking strings,
and my voice cracks when I sing from my heart
guess that's the price I've got to pay to know that I'm alive
this melody is tearing me apart


THRICE RULES!!!!!!!!!
Gott weiß ich will kein Engel sein.
http://www.myspace.com/otherrandomdude

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Tuesday, January 29, 2008 4:36 AM

HERO


I'm keeping the top two ways to destroy the Earth to myself...just in case.

I will give you a hint. One involves a Ron Paul Presidency and the other is something even less likely then that (involving Ron Paul).

H

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Tuesday, January 29, 2008 4:37 AM

HERO


Quote:

Originally posted by Alliethorn7:
Chuck Norris doesn't count. That much awesome can NOT be broken!!!


Wow, thats a great line. I'm going to use it in a screenplay I'm writing about Chuck Norris saving the world (from Ron Paul).


H

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Tuesday, January 29, 2008 5:16 AM

JONGSSTRAW


Quote:

Originally posted by Hero:
Quote:

Originally posted by Alliethorn7:
Chuck Norris doesn't count. That much awesome can NOT be broken!!!


Wow, thats a great line. I'm going to use it in a screenplay I'm writing about Chuck Norris saving the world (from Ron Paul). H


I saw & listened to Chuck Norris last night on H&C. Although I truly admire & respect the guy, I think he's backing a guy who will likely be out of the race in 2 weeks. Then what does he do?...Throw his support to McCain or Romney? Would hardly seem genuine to me if he did. These "endorsements of party candidates" are silly and risky business. There's no reason for it. Once a party gives us a candidate based on delegates earned through state primaries, then politicians and celebrities can endorse whoever they want, but at least they'll actually be Presidential candidates. As meaningless and silly as all the Kennedys are now throwing their support to Obama, once Hillary is the party candidate, they're gonna look even more silly and ridiculous flipping back over to Hillary ( if such a thing is possible.)

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Tuesday, January 29, 2008 3:29 PM

LEADB


So Hero, if I'm reading this all right, you've changed your mind and decided that Dr. Ron Paul is the man to back for President of the United States?

====
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