REAL WORLD EVENT DISCUSSIONS

TOP TEN QUESTIONS POLLSTERS REALLY SHOULD ASK

POSTED BY: MISBEHAVEN
UPDATED: Thursday, October 12, 2006 11:08
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Monday, October 9, 2006 10:07 AM

MISBEHAVEN



By Don Davis: www.satiricalpolitical.com


Is there anything more maddening than those senseless and superficial poll questions, that are guaranteed to elicit responses that are not only misleading, but skewed to the right? Well, here’s a suggested Top Ten list of poll questions that would really tell it like it is:

10. If your own son was drafted to serve in Iraq, would you favor “cut and run,” or “sprint like Willie Horton being chased by the Klan?”

9. If Bush required you to pay more taxes to finance the Iraqi war, which timetable for withdrawal would you support: 3 to 5 years, or the 6:44 out of Fallujah?

8. Would you back Bush’s warrantless spying on international communications, if he was monitoring your phone-sex calls to Hot Nymphs in the Netherlands?

7. How would you feel about prayer in the schools — if Muslims just obtained a majority on your local school board?

6. Should the schools also teach the theory of Intelligent Design, even though it’s likely that, as with most designers, this one was also gay?

5. Would you vote to ban abortion, if you just found out your teenage daughter got knocked up by the Mexican gardener?

4. Would you still favor public posting of The Ten Commandments, even if it’s interpreted to ban the worship of American Idol?

3. If your job and benefits get outsourced to Bangalore, would you still consider national health insurance a communist plot?

2. Would you still be anti-union, after your supervisor at Wal-Mart limits you to one bathroom trip per day, and you have to pay for your own toilet paper?

1. Would habeas corpus seem a bit more important to you after you fall asleep in the tanning bed, and get mistaken for one of Osama’s five dozen “No. 2’s.”






When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
-Hunter S. Thompson

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Monday, October 9, 2006 10:15 AM

CAUSAL


Interesting questions, and I totally see where he's trying to lead a buddy, but I still disagreed with half the things I'm supposed to think on the basis of his poll.

________________________________________________________________________
Grand High Poobah of the Mythical Land of Iowa, and Keeper of State Secrets



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Monday, October 9, 2006 10:27 AM

KANEMAN


Wow, talk about a loaded poll. Thank the heavens you don't work for Gallup. Is that an agenda hanging out of your mouth? You may need new material for thread starting, your stuff is getting as stale as the cigar Monica Lewinsky sat on.....Well, it's true........

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Monday, October 9, 2006 11:57 AM

CAUSAL


Just for the fun of it

10. If your own son was drafted to serve in Iraq, would you favor “cut and run,” or “sprint like Willie Horton being chased by the Klan?”

Neither (and I'd just like to point out that this question assumes that a child's being drafted necessarily entails opposition to the war, which I'm not sure is justified). In any event, being that there isn't a draft I believe this is a moot question. But even if we grant that there was one, I think that it's a citizen's duty to serve his government (including military service, if deemed necessary) as a beneficiary of the protections that government affords. So I would pack him off to the induction center, go home, hit my knees, and pray like crazy.

9. If Bush required you to pay more taxes to finance the Iraqi war, which timetable for withdrawal would you support: 3 to 5 years, or the 6:44 out of Fallujah?

Again, note the the question is set up such that higher taxes entails support for a time table, which isn't justified, necessarily. I'm personally opposed to the notion of fixing a time table (but I'm not going to get into that here for fear of the flames). And if the government wants more money, well, then, I'll render unto Caesar.

8. Would you back Bush’s warrantless spying on international communications, if he was monitoring your phone-sex calls to Hot Nymphs in the Netherlands?

I'm actually opposed to the warrantless eavesdropping program; but because I'm not a phone-sex customer, it's on somewhat different grounds.

7. How would you feel about prayer in the schools — if Muslims just obtained a majority on your local school board?

Prayers being said in school? Fine with me. Prayers being compulsory in schools? No way, I don't care whose god is being prayed to. That said, if some kid wants to have a Bible club or pray before lunch, more power to him. Just as long as he's not made to. Establishment Clause, people! It's meant to prevent the government from setting up a state sponsored religion, not to eradicate religious expression from public places.

6. Should the schools also teach the theory of Intelligent Design, even though it’s likely that, as with most designers, this one was also gay?

Well, I'll go ahead and ignore that blatant insult. I don't support teaching ID as science because it clearly isn't. It's not a cosmogonical account, nor a scientific theory, in the strictest sense. ID, strictly speaking, doesn't deny that evolution took place; just that it didn't take place randomly (at least that's my read on it). So I have no problem with a teacher saying, "Some people believe this happened at random; some don't. Go decide for yourself."

5. Would you vote to ban abortion, if you just found out your teenage daughter got knocked up by the Mexican gardener?

Yes.

4. Would you still favor public posting of The Ten Commandments, even if it’s interpreted to ban the worship of American Idol?

I would especially be in favor of it if it meant getting rid of American Idol. Bloody stupid show.

In all seriousness, there's some historical value in the decalogue in terms of their being an ancient formulation of laws (and, arguably, a source that was drawn on for the formulation of our own). But you better be careful how you display them, because there's that whole Establishment Clause.

3. If your job and benefits get outsourced to Bangalore, would you still consider national health insurance a communist plot?

Well, this commits the straw man fallacy ( http://www.fallacyfiles.org/strawman.html), so I'm tempted to just move along. I'll ignore the communist plot business and the outsourcing business and say that I'm opposed to national health care because I think it'll be run just like every other government agency: shoddily and inefficiently.

2. Would you still be anti-union, after your supervisor at Wal-Mart limits you to one bathroom trip per day, and you have to pay for your own toilet paper?

But--I'm not anti-union. I actually think that companies like Wal-Mart are the reason that unions are necessary (and I think those poor bastards should unionize PDQ). That said, I think a lot of unions are greedy and manipulative. As with any institution run by human beings, they can do good, and can do evil.

1. Would habeas corpus seem a bit more important to you after you fall asleep in the tanning bed, and get mistaken for one of Osama’s five dozen “No. 2’s.”

I don't tan, so I think that's pretty unlikely to happen. And I'm interested to hear who he thinks Osama's other "No. 2's" are, other than Zawahiri. But anyhow, I actually think habeas corpus is an incredibly important protection.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Let me take this opportunity to say how frightening it is that I agree with Kaneman--but I do: bias out there much? The insulting thing about this (and it should insult people from the left every bit as much as people from the right) is that this guy thinks that there are two-and-only-two positions to take (and he sets his poll questions up such that the only "reasonable" position is some extreme version of leftism). Reality has to be grayer than this, folks. Do I think GWB is a saint? Hells, no. The anti-Christ, then? No, again. And really, that's my problem with 90% of the RWED that goes on around here: it's predicated on a logical fallacy (false dilemma, http://www.fallacyfiles.org/eitheror.html). Personally, I'm of the opinion that thinking people will come up with their own conclusions, some of which agree with the left, some with the right. It's just lazy thinking to adopt wholesale whatever positions your party-of-choice tells you to. And on top of that, it's sheer arrogance and hypocrisy to then excuse yourself from even listening to the arguments contra your position "because they're idiots"--which is yet another fallacy: ad hominem ( http://www.fallacyfiles.org/adhomine.html).

/Rant
________________________________________________________________________
Grand High Poobah of the Mythical Land of Iowa, and Keeper of State Secrets



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Monday, October 9, 2006 12:09 PM

MISBEHAVEN


Quote:

Originally posted by kaneman:
Wow, talk about a loaded poll.




Obviously you didn't notice the link: satiricalpolitical.com

Satire is the use of irony, ridicule, and sarcasm to expose folly. That means it's a joke.

A dog can't tell a Nazi from a Republican from a Commie from a Democrat and, many times, neither can I.
-Charles Bukowski

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Monday, October 9, 2006 12:13 PM

KANEMAN


Quote:

Originally posted by misbehaven:

By Don Davis: www.satiricalpolitical.com


Is there anything more maddening than those senseless and superficial poll questions, that are guaranteed to elicit responses that are not only misleading, but skewed to the right? Well, here’s a suggested Top Ten list of poll questions that would really tell it like it is:

10. If your own son was drafted to serve in Iraq, would you favor “cut and run,” or “sprint like Willie Horton being chased by the Klan?”

9. If Bush required you to pay more taxes to finance the Iraqi war, which timetable for withdrawal would you support: 3 to 5 years, or the 6:44 out of Fallujah?

8. Would you back Bush’s warrantless spying on international communications, if he was monitoring your phone-sex calls to Hot Nymphs in the Netherlands?

7. How would you feel about prayer in the schools — if Muslims just obtained a majority on your local school board?

6. Should the schools also teach the theory of Intelligent Design, even though it’s likely that, as with most designers, this one was also gay?

5. Would you vote to ban abortion, if you just found out your teenage daughter got knocked up by the Mexican gardener?

4. Would you still favor public posting of The Ten Commandments, even if it’s interpreted to ban the worship of American Idol?

3. If your job and benefits get outsourced to Bangalore, would you still consider national health insurance a communist plot?

2. Would you still be anti-union, after your supervisor at Wal-Mart limits you to one bathroom trip per day, and you have to pay for your own toilet paper?

1. Would habeas corpus seem a bit more important to you after you fall asleep in the tanning bed, and get mistaken for one of Osama’s five dozen “No. 2’s.”






When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
-Hunter S. Thompson




I am also offended by the gay designer stuff. In my line of work I come across a lot of gay animals that are confused about wither they should hump my shoes or tie them...you are sick.

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Monday, October 9, 2006 12:18 PM

MISBEHAVEN


Quote:

Let me take this opportunity to say how frightening it is that I agree with Kaneman--but I do: bias out there much?


While I enjoyed reading your answers, I'm astounded that you spent that much time replying to a satirical post. I'll tell you the same thing I told Kaneman. It's satire. It's a joke, nothing more. If you don't think it's funny, then that's quite alright. But don't take it so literally. While it is indeed meant to expose an alternative point of view, it's only doing so in a comical matter.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
-Hunter S. Thompson

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Monday, October 9, 2006 12:25 PM

MISBEHAVEN


Quote:

Originally posted by kaneman:

I am also offended by the gay designer stuff.



Kaneman, offended! Say it isn't so.

Buy the ticket. Take the ride.
-Hunter S. Thompson

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Monday, October 9, 2006 12:27 PM

KANEMAN


Quote:

Originally posted by misbehaven:
Quote:

Originally posted by kaneman:

I am also offended by the gay designer stuff.



Kaneman, offended! Say it isn't so.

Buy the ticket. Take the ride.
-Hunter S. Thompson




Well, it's true........

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Monday, October 9, 2006 12:31 PM

MISBEHAVEN


Sure

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
-Hunter S. Thompson

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Monday, October 9, 2006 12:32 PM

MISBEHAVEN


Ahhh...it got me. My first double post.

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Monday, October 9, 2006 12:42 PM

KANEMAN


Happens to most people that live in the "real world"...You will get over it.... I am Sure

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Monday, October 9, 2006 1:23 PM

CAUSAL


I get that it's satire. I just thought it might be fun to answers the questions.

________________________________________________________________________
Grand High Poobah of the Mythical Land of Iowa, and Keeper of State Secrets



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Tuesday, October 10, 2006 2:49 AM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Hee hee hee hee hee.

Thanks for the laughs, Mis!

BTW- Due to your sigs I just HAD to look up Hunter S. Thompson. I figured anyone that you'd quote has to be an iconoclast.



---------------------------------
Reality sucks. Especially when it contradicts our cherished ideas.

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Tuesday, October 10, 2006 2:58 AM

FREMDFIRMA


Ya might wanna rethink that last part.

Given the extreme likelyhood of either Russel E Nelson (aka Rusty) or Hunter S Thompson being the one holding the camera during those pictures that got wannabehero all wound up.

Thompson was deeply involved in all that mess, and the risk of that coming to light was likely a factor in his suicide.

Gonzo had his moments, but don't let that blind you to his dark side either.

-Frem

PS. Ya don't believe me ? look it up yourself.

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Tuesday, October 10, 2006 3:58 AM

MISBEHAVEN


If you want to know more, then rent Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Johnny Depp plays Hunter Thompson and there's even a cameo with the good doctor himself. Also worth renting is Bill Murray's Where the Buffalo Roam. It's not a good as Fear and Loathing, but it's still worth watching. Of course his books are great, and I would highly recommend those as well.

It never got weird enough for me.
-Hunter S. Thompson

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Tuesday, October 10, 2006 4:07 AM

MISBEHAVEN


Quote:

Originally posted by Fremdfirma:

Thompson was deeply involved in all that mess, and the risk of that coming to light was likely a factor in his suicide.



Oh come on, Frem. You don't honestly believe all that conspiratorial junk do you? Hunter talked about suicide off an on for most of his adult life. He shot himself because of his many health problems. Problems that were causing him a great deal of pain, which he simply decided he no longer wanted to deal with. I'll grant you that Gonzo had his dark side, but the notion that he was the camera man in a snuff film is absurd. And it's made all the more so by the complete lack of any real evidence to back it up.




It never got weird enough for me.
-Hunter S. Thompson

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Tuesday, October 10, 2006 5:46 PM

FREMDFIRMA


Quote:

Oh come on, Frem. You don't honestly believe all that conspiratorial junk do you?


So corroborrated courtroom testimony resulting in damages for the plaintiff is "conspiratorial junk" because you find it unpleasant to believe ?

I am not PN, I do my homework and I draw conclusions only when enough evidence to do so is present.

Both Russell Nelson and Gonzo were, in fact, involved, based on evidence and testimony from multiple credible sources, both witnesses and principals - in fact they appear to have testified against each other at one point in 1988.

District Judge Warren Urbom found Russell's testimony credible, and fully supported by case evidence in 1999 - which probably would not have happened on Russell's word alone, not a man like Russell.

They were both to be searched (Warrants for the seizure of photographic equipment and materials regarding the case) and probably arrested 02-16-05, but apparently Thompson must have gotten wind of it early and ate his pistol shortly before that, and they did arrest Nelson, so likely they would have also arrested Gonzo, which would not have bothered him too greatly, but they would have destroyed his reputation, which he found intolerable - especially on top of his growing health problems.

Gonzo played pretty rough, and with some pretty rough people, all his life, him being involved in such things doesn't really surprise me - you cite lack of evidence, but there's plenty of it.

He had style, but he had a dark side, there's no denying it.

-Frem

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Wednesday, October 11, 2006 1:14 PM

MISBEHAVEN


If Gonzo did in fact do this, then I'd say he got off light; however, I've been unable to locate what is being claimed here anywhere other than the usual conspiracy theory sites. And to me those are hardly legitimate enough to count as proof. When the same site making these accusations against Thompson also states that Bush is part of a Luciferian cult that practices pedophilia and necrophilia, I have a tendency to dismiss them regardless of what they may have posted. Simply posting something on a website doesn't make it true. If this were true, then it seems like at least one credible news agency would have covered the story, but none apparently did.

Furthermore, I have a hard time imagining why Bush and Co. would want Thompson anywhere near such a thing if it was in fact happening. Gonzo spent most of his career lampooning Republicans, especially Nixon and the Bush family. It doesn't make any sense.





It never got weird enough for me.
-Hunter S. Thompson

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Wednesday, October 11, 2006 2:56 PM

PIRATENEWS

John Lee, conspiracy therapist at Hollywood award-winner History Channel-mocked SNL-spoofed PirateNew.org wooHOO!!!!!!


NEW STRAWMAN POLL:

Quote:



10. Now that your own cancerous grandmother was drafted by recall to active duty at age 70, to be one of the 180,000 dead US Gulf War soldiers, be raped, be one of 500,000 disabled US Gulf War soldiers poisoned by sabotaged vaccines and radioactive gamma rays from D-Uranium, or have her legs blown off in Iraq, would you favor "arrest George Bush Jr", or "execute George Bush Jr", the convicted criminal who is currently sued for perping the 9/11 Massacres?

9. Now that Bush stole $4.5-trillion from Pentagon CAFR pension funds, and requires you to pay more taxes to finance the Iraqi war by bombing US troops and blaiming the Arabs in Operation Northwoods and USS Liberty styled "False Flag" attacks, what timetable would you favor arrest and execution of George Bush Jr, "do it now" or "do it in 60 seconds"?

8. Would you back domestic terrorist Bush’s warrantless spying on international communications, now that he is recording your every domestic telephone call and email, spying on your with hidden video cameras, and hired GoogleNSA to record inside your home via hijacking your computer microphone?

7. How would you feel about the Kol Nidre prayer in the schools — now that Israeli Luciferian Baby-Killing Jews run the US edjewkashun system?

6. Should you become a sodomite and perform ritual child sacrifice to a 50-foot-tall idol, now that Govt owns all churches via IRS 501c3 contracts, the schools now teach the theory that Lucifer/Satan/Molech/Baphomet is god, even though it’s likely that, as with most asshole tranvestites who prance around nekked at Bohemian Grove holding George Bushes' weener and getting serviced by male porn stars, this one was also gay?

5. Would you vote to ban abortion (pretending you had any right to vote on anything in your pathetic life as a slave), now that you just found out all your grandchildren were genocided, resulting in your own scheduled genocide in a Death Camp to "balance the books" of the insurance pension fund and Social Security Ponzi schemes?

4. Would you still favor censorship of The Ten Commandments, now that censorship of it in court it legalized the Jewish Babylonia Talmudic Kol Nidre Prayer's legalization of perjury and fraud on all contracts with Goyim, and rape of all children?

3. If your job and benefits get outsourced to Mexico and Communist cannibals in China, and you are one of 2.5-million US citizens genocided in Death Camps in USA every year, and you are dead and rotting in a grave, wouldn't you still consider national "health" insurance a plank of the Communist Manifesto?

2. Would you still be pro-union, after your CEO and Mafia union reps outsourced your job to Mexico, Communist China and 200-million criminal alien terrorists in USA?

1. Wouldn't habeas corpus not seem important to you after you are arrested and gang-raped with battery acid by martial law Police State Death Squad, kidnapped to Gitmo and waterboarded to death then rescusiciated over and over, then see your picture posted by the FBI as one of the 19 hijackers, half of whom are still alive and giving interviews to BBC TV, since you don't care about anything because you're dead?


"You can't stop the signal!"
-Mr Universe, Pirate TV

FIREFLY SERENITY PILOT MUSIC VIDEO V2
Tangerine Dream - Thief Soundtrack: Confrontation
http://radio.indymedia.org/news/2006/03/8912.php
www.myspace.com/piratenewsctv
www.piratenews.org


Does that seem right to you?
www.scifi.com/onair/

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Wednesday, October 11, 2006 4:59 PM

DREAMTROVE


Okay,

this is getting better


Kaneman,

He didn't write the poll


Signym,

You had to look up Hunter S. Thompson? Hmm, maybe I had you pegged in the wrong generation.


Misbehaven,

That's a clever partisan rant, Like Casual, I disagree with half the positions.

10. Cut and run is an appalling strategy. If I were in Iraq, I'd oppose it. Most of the people I know going/been do. We do have a mission there, and owe it to the Iraqis to defend what we have created for them, which seems possibly better than what we have here in terms of democracy. Killing 1/2 a million people and then skedaddling is really not a very cool thing to do.

9. I don't support any additional spending for Iraq. I see no reason it can't be done on the regular military budget. Only the random acts of genocide cost us money, and as I recall, we were going to pay for reconstruction with oil. I'm willing to liquidate Halliburton if it helps.

8. Spying on your citizens is never cool. It's so Soviet Union.

7. Those prayers weren't mandatory. I totally would support prayer in public schools if I weren't so strongly in favor of abolishing public schools.

6. Intelligent Design is idiocy. I support the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

5. Why is it that everyone is convinced that conservatives hate Mexicans? I think this is Bush's doing. Abortion, always wrong, all the time. Simple rule: Killing is wrong, Simpler rule: Death=bad.

4. Ten Commandments are a bad guide, and worse yet, a completely inconsistant one. I read recently that thou shalt not kill was added by some king of judea in like 4c bc or something. Essentially, the best stuff on the 10c is in everyone's basic law. The other stuff is in direct violation of the constitution, and it can't appear in a public building.

3. I support outsourcing, particularly to Bangalore. I think that Democrats should really put a lid on this one before they get the reputation of hating hindus. I think everyone underestimates the degree to which the indians have earned our jobs fair and square, and how the level playing field is rapidly solving the problem of global economic disparity that socialist revolutionaries have failed to make any headway on in the past century. This about the this, the per capita GDP in a number of sub-saharan, (read black) African countries now exceeds the wealth of several of their european counterparts. Botswana, for example, has twice the total wealth of moldova, but only 1/3 of the population. Economically, things are getting better world-wide, and the free market is making it happen. Don't knock what works.

2. Unions are evil, which doesn't mean Walmart isn't also evil. I'll be anti-union any day of the week. If I don't like the job conditions, I'll quit. It's a free market. If it were a socialist dictatorship, maybe that option wouldn't be open to me, but it's not, so it is.

1. Habeas Corpus is still law, and Bush is still an @$$hole.

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Thursday, October 12, 2006 10:56 AM

FREMDFIRMA


I found the Washington Times to be an entirely credible source, as are courtroom documents dated may 14th 1990 (original case, bonaccai) and feb 5th 1999 (followup, nelson), I'm sure enough interest could find transcripts of the testimony in question - not to mention a former FBI chief and other law enforcement folk who present a convincing case.

While I don't think he was involved as deeply as folks like PN believe, I do think he wanted to get his hands on that $100,000.00 USD "bounty" going around at the time for a provable snuff film, and in the process, implicate some pretty scummy people on both sides of the political fence - thus he did what he felt was useful to get close to them, possibly crossing certain journalistic lines, but that was Gonzo at his finest.

I never understood why the conspiratorial types feel the need to dress this particular issue up, the mere facts are damning enough by themselves.

From what I can sort out from the tacked on, overblown conclusions and allegations, it was the arrest of George Paul Bishop that tipped Gonzo off, so he figured to go out with a bang instead of the ignomity of prosecution - and for the record, I don't find Rusty's testimony all that credible, save for the supporting evidence.

Was he involved ? hell yes.
How deeply and why is probably going to remain a mystery, and I will not speculate beyond what I already have.

-Frem

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Thursday, October 12, 2006 11:08 AM

MISBEHAVEN




This severely damages my calm. I'm going to have to try and locate this Washington Times article and run down some more information on this, because this thread is the first time I've heard anything about this stuff. This is a real disappointment regardless of Gonzo's intentions. Interestingly, I did read that the last thing he typed was one word: counselor. It was in the middle of the page. That might be somewhat telling when viewed in light of this situtation.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
-Hunter S. Thompson

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