REAL WORLD EVENT DISCUSSIONS

KO on Prop 8

POSTED BY: KHYRON
UPDATED: Friday, November 14, 2008 03:30
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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 11:30 AM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Wulf, w/o getting into whether homosexual orientation is a "lifestyle choice" or not (I happen to think not)... But let's assume it IS a "lifestyle choice".... Aren' you all about choices and freedom and keeping the gummint outta stuff it aughtn't be putting it's nose in? What it sounds like you're saying is... you got the freedom to choose as long as I like your choices.

Really, what skin comes off YOUR nose whether gays get married or not?

ETA: Anyway, no need to answer. I think I've beat this horse dead... and then some!
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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 12:46 PM

WULFENSTAR

http://youtu.be/VUnGTXRxGHg


Sigy, you know better. Thats not what I'm saying at all.


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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 1:27 PM

STORYMARK


Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:
The people have spoken, and that's not good enough?



I guess we can quote you here whenever you bitch about Obama, right?

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him."

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 1:28 PM

STORYMARK


Quote:

Originally posted by Wulfenstar:
Sigy, you know better. Thats not what I'm saying at all.




Then why not answer that querstion....?


And if marriage is strictly a religious institution, as you claim - why is it okay for the state to dictate the terms at all? Shouldn't it be up to the individual church?

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him."

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 1:31 PM

ELVISCHRIST


Quote:


So, how about next time you think of opening your stupid Pollock mouth.... Don't.



You're doing a REEEEEEEEEEEALLY good job of convincing us that you aren't a bigot, Wulf. Keep it up!

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 1:42 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Quote:

Sigy, you know better. Thats not what I'm saying at all.
I prefer that you NOT explain to me what you're saying. It's not that I'm not interested, but I don't want to get into an argument. So just color me "clueless" and let it pass.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 2:11 PM

FREMDFIRMA


Quote:

Religion. Which, I'd say, should stay out of politics. This is why I've always taken issue with marriage being a religious institution. If people want to get married in a church, that's their choice, but the dictates of the religion shouldn't rule who can get married. That's not separation of church and state.
Everyone should be able to get married, or everyone should have domestic partnerships. Me, I would be fine with it all being domestic partnership, since marriage is a religious institution an' all. But, you know, marriage has also become a state institution, and it's a tradition, and everyone knows what it means already, that two people who are in love are joining their lives together. Also, it's shorter and easier to say, rolls off the tongue so to speak, and people tend to prefer that in their words and terms. So why not call it all marriage, then? Well, if the Church and their sheeple would stop screaming about it, we could right? Except that again brings up keeping religion out of law... I could just go on in that circle.
Bottom line, calling it something different but claiming it's the same thing is patently ridiculous. Calling it the same thing but saying it was a little different would also be ridiculous. Just let everyone have the same options.


And PR beats me to the punch, completely.

If the STATE is going to define and recognize marriage as a LEGAL institution, which IMHO, it should not - then it should recognize it between any two human beings above age of consent regardless of gender, race, creed, culture or religion.

Or it should simply stay the fuck out of it entire.

This one IS black and white, all or nothing - everyone, or no one.

Anything other than that is pure discrimination of an UnConstitutional form and thus a flagrant violation of the First Amendment.

-Frem

It cannot be said enough, those who do not learn from history, are doomed to endlessly repeat it

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 3:12 PM

FUTUREMRSFILLION


Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:
The people have spoken, and that's not good enough? Looks like Gays are asking to be treated special.



It is not those who use the term "Islamo-Fascism" who are sullying the name of Islam; it is the Islamo-Fascists. - Dennis Prager


" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "



That is one of the most asinine things you have said on this forum.

Banning gays from getting married IS treating them special - in a negative way.

I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"

FORSAKEN original

Trolls Against McCain




“I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” Mahatma Gandhi

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 3:26 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important



Hello,

I hold with those of the minority opinion that government should have nothing to do with marriage period.

Marriage, in my opinion, is a religious institution. You will invariably find a church somewhere willing to bind two of anybody or anything together under the watch of one or more divinities.

Civil Unions should be available to all adults of either sex who wish to bind together under a legal economic construct.

And thus, I would dissolve marriage as a legal construct, and apply Civil Unions to everybody. No Christians need object, as God and Government deserve a divorce in this country, and it has already been strongly declared that 'Civil Unions are the same as Marriage.'

--Anthony

"Liberty must not be purchased at the cost of Humanity." --Captain Robert Henner

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 3:38 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Quote:

and it has already been strongly declared that 'Civil Unions are the same as Marriage.
You can "declare" them to be the same all you want, but legally, they are NOT. And just saying so doesn't make it so.

Now, if what you're proposing is a wholesale change in law at the Federal and State level to make "civil unions" the equivalent of marriage, that's a different story. But that's what if would take.

Frem, a "marriage" is a contract. The advantage of marriage is that the contract is recognized wherever you go.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 3:46 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello Signy,

I think you sidestepped the point of my commentary.

--Anthony

"Liberty must not be purchased at the cost of Humanity." --Captain Robert Henner

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 4:09 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


I don't think so.

Marriage has legal, tax, benefit, and other implications. It IS a contract. But it's a contract with the benefit of being recognized in all 50 states, by the Federal government, and by hospitals, insurance companies, probate judges etc etc.

All of those laws and contracts: the ones adopted by the Federal government, by the states, and so forth... refer specifically to marriage. In order to get the same recognition for civil unions you'd have to rewrite all of the laws which refer to marriage to include "civil unions".

Now, since marriage is a contract, isn't it convenient to have this contract have legal standing in all 50 states? Or do you feel that there should be no such contract between people, or that the state has no business recognizing it?

---------------------------------
Let's party like its 1929.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 4:20 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

I'll review my position.

Marriage is a religious institution that has been adopted by the government as a legal contract between a man and a woman.

Civil Unions are a legal contract between consenting adults, adopted by some governments to avoid using the term marriage.

I would like to see all U.S. governments completely disassociate themselves from marriage, and make Civil Unions the new legal contract between consenting adults of all stripes. Obviously there will be a strong movement to expand the definition of Civil Unions to incorporate all benefits of the former Marriage, but avoiding that messy religious expectation of 'husband and wife.'

Those who want to be united before a divinity can still do so at will, and the government need have nothing to do with it.

--Anthony

"Liberty must not be purchased at the cost of Humanity." --Captain Robert Henner

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 4:30 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


But that's what we have now. Those who wish to marry in a civil ceremony can, and those who want to marry in a religious ceremony can. The two have little to do with each other except they are BOTH recognized by the state, and it seems a pointless exercise to go thought and rewrite all of the laws because some religiously sensitive peeps have a notion that "marriage" is exclusively religious. Why not call a religious marriage a "consecrated union" instead?

FWIW I never thought, for example, that our civil marriage was in any way less than a religious marriage. We both feel that marriage is not an expression of "love" as much as "commitment" and we've been married more than thirty years through thick and thin.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 4:44 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

The reason we have all this controversy over marriage is because marriage has been around for a long, long time. And it is a religious word.

The Christians (of which I am one) and other Monotheists believe that by re-defining 'marriage' you are soiling a religious precept that they were raised to believe was morally correct. They don't want government messing with their marriage.

To which I say, "I Agree!"

Shame on government for Ever having Anything to do with marriage. Now we can set things right. Take government's grubby little hands off of the religious purity of marriage...

By discontinuing any reference to marriage in the laws of government.

Civil Unions were always designed to be non-religious. They are purely legal constructs to serve an economic purpose, and have no religious overtones.

So, government should divorce itself from marriage, a concept polluted by religious ideas, and embrace a Civil Union absent of religious verbiage or moralizing. Civil Unions need not even involve sex at all! They would become the purely legal and economic union that government needs, and the rest can be left to people's faith and personal morality.

The fact that everyone can have a Civil Union but not everyone can have a marriage makes it blindingly clear which of the two is the more correct institution for an unbiased government.

--Anthony

"Liberty must not be purchased at the cost of Humanity." --Captain Robert Henner

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 5:47 PM

YINYANG

You were busy trying to get yourself lit on fire. It happens.


How is marriage a religious word? And, even if it is, can it not also be a non-religious word as well? Just like there are two different versions of Christmas - the secular celebration with Santa Claus, etc., and the religious one involving the birth of Jesus - can't there be a secular marriage and a religious one? Because I for one don't think that the religious own the word marriage, nor should they.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 6:09 PM

MALBADINLATIN


Quote:

Originally posted by yinyang:
How is marriage a religious word? And, even if it is, can it not also be a non-religious word as well? Just like there are two different versions of Christmas - the secular celebration with Santa Claus, etc., and the religious one involving the birth of Jesus - can't there be a secular marriage and a religious one? Because I for one don't think that the religious own the word marriage, nor should they.

The ideal outcome would be for any human couple to get married in the church they choose.
Anti gay marriage people have suggested that gays create a gay church and marry there.

The problem with that is...being told you can't get married is not much better than being told where and how you must get married. It is a human rights issue.

The whole thing is compounded by an issue involving the Mormon Church's alleged involvement in the Yes on 8 campaign that could jeopardize thier status as a tax exempt organization.

The Mormon Church is under seige, and with all the adversity they've faced over the years, especially involving Polygamy, they wouldn't be the way they are becomming.

Shit...Mitt Romney was for gay marriage when Governor of Massachusettes. So Mormons supporting basic human rights is possible

Trolls against McCain

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 6:13 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

They do think they own the word marriage. Obviously they believe this, because they are busy being the arbiter of who can and cannot get married. Because such divisiveness and double standardization are not the function of the government, I propose we let the religious personages of the world keep their word 'marriage' and allow government to discard it in favor of the superior Civil Union, a title with no religious connotations whatsoever.

Otherwise, the religious people of the nation are liable to get confused, forget to separate church and state, and accidentally discriminate against a class of people.

--Anthony


"Liberty must not be purchased at the cost of Humanity." --Captain Robert Henner

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 6:18 PM

SIGMANUNKI


Quote:

Originally posted by Wulfenstar:
Rue,

Its not a right to get married.

They can have civil unions. Maybe.

You, nor the liberal ilk, can force churches to marry people. Separation of church and state remember?




There is a difference between:

The gays have the right to get married.

And:

Churches are forced to marry anyone that can legally get married.

You seem to have confused the two. The latter is the boogy-man that the religious nutters use to get people to back them.

Point of fact, churches of any religious don't have to marry anyone that they don't want to. Catholicism is a good example of this. Many (most?) of those churches will refuse to marry a couple unless BOTH are Catholic. This is legal. Similarly, with many other religions.

Basically, the point of all this is _not_ to force anyone to marry gays against there will. It's rather that the gays are allowed to get married by the people who wish to marry them.

----
I am on The Original List (twice). We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 8:18 PM

YINYANG

You were busy trying to get yourself lit on fire. It happens.


Quote:

Originally posted by AnthonyT:
Hello,

They do think they own the word marriage. Obviously they believe this, because they are busy being the arbiter of who can and cannot get married. Because such divisiveness and double standardization are not the function of the government, I propose we let the religious personages of the world keep their word 'marriage' and allow government to discard it in favor of the superior Civil Union, a title with no religious connotations whatsoever.

Otherwise, the religious people of the nation are liable to get confused, forget to separate church and state, amd accidentally discriminate against a class of people.



It is a nice, neat, simple solution, I'll admit. But (and here I may be playing devil's advocate a little bit), why should the government change to accommodate people who have a problem separating church and state? Because same-sex marriage isn't an issue that should ever have been up for a vote in the first place. If that had been remembered by The Powers That Be, then religious people would not have had the ability to act on their confusion and legalize unfair discrimination. Instead, The Powers That Be, as non-confused people (I hope), recognizing that whether the government should "marry" people or "civil union"-ize them is something to be considered separately from the matter of giving same-sex couples their equal rights, should be left to make the decision.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 8:25 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Quote:

The reason we have all this controversy over marriage is because marriage has been around for a long, long time. And it is a religious word.

The Christians (of which I am one) and other Monotheists believe that by re-defining 'marriage' you are soiling a religious precept that they were raised to believe was morally correct. They don't want government messing with their marriage.

Well, I don't want religious peeps to mess with government. And what you propose would entail rewriting so many laws it would be stupid.

And BTW you have a VERY provincial view of marriage. In ancient Greece, and in many ancient cultures, the woman became the "property" of the man.... which still exists in many parts of the world today. In India, they are arranged, often at a very early age, and occur in stages which include a dowry. In Saudi Arabia (a "monotheistic" country) it's often between cousins, and men can have more than one wife. In old Polynesia, anyone could marry anyone - except the first born of the first born were tapu (taboo) because their marrying down would dilute their sacred powers. In the Old Testament, concubinage was accepted.

Marriage is not what you think it is. It doesn't fit into a white- picket- fence- suburban- Christian- paradigm.

---------------------------------
Let's party like its 1929.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 9:47 PM

RIGHTEOUS9


according to wikipedia, Marriage not only predates the Bible, but there were occasionaly male-male marriages before the year 342, at which point, said marriages were declared illegal by Christian Emperor Constantius.

Everything i'm reading on the subject says that marriage had no religious origin, and was meant as a way of securing property rights.

So while I was willing to entertain the notion of banning the word from government use, I've changed my mind, and refuse to allow a legal word, a good word with an interesting history, to be coopted by the religious right.

Granted, marriage is not the original latin word.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 10:19 PM

KHYRON


Quote:

Originally posted by AnthonyT:
Because such divisiveness and double standardization are not the function of the government, I propose we let the religious personages of the world keep their word 'marriage' and allow government to discard it in favor of the superior Civil Union, a title with no religious connotations whatsoever.

This is what I've been saying for ages already. It's the simplest and cleanest solution: if you take it out of the political realm, the problem is solved for everybody.
Quote:

Originally posted by yinyang:
But (and here I may be playing devil's advocate a little bit), why should the government change to accommodate people who have a problem separating church and state?

Well, the government can either change the laws regarding this issue and solve the problem, or we can wait for a couple more decades for enough bigots to die off from old age so that the people who are "liberal" on this are in the majority (after all, society progresses one funeral at a time). I propose the former, it's quicker and cleanly separates the murky interface between church and state that exists with regard to this issue.

------------------------------

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 10:37 PM

AGENTROUKA


So because some religious people CLAIM that it is a religious word only.. it should be so?

So, when religious people claim that morality can only be born from religion, it should be considered true, also? And no unreligious person can consider themselves moral?

What other words should be struck from non-religious usage to prevent offense?

It is clearly not a term confined to religion. They simply don't have a leg to stand on and I fail to see why they can't let it go. Should the government really pander to them?

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 10:54 PM

KHYRON


Quote:

Originally posted by AgentRouka:
Should the government really pander to them?

It's not about pandering to religious bigots, it's about finding the most effective and elegant solution to the problem. Besides, it's not just religious people who are against gay marriage.

------------------------------

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 10:58 PM

AGENTROUKA


Quote:

Originally posted by Khyron:
Quote:

Originally posted by AgentRouka:
Should the government really pander to them?

It's not about pandering to religious bigots, it's about finding the most effective and elegant solution to the problem. Besides, it's not just religious people who are against gay marriage.

------------------------------

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?



I don't see it being necessarily elegant, considering that non-religious, heterosexual married couples are not necessarily going to be thrilled to have the word marriage taken away from them to be given to the religious only.

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Tuesday, November 11, 2008 11:04 PM

KHYRON


Maybe, but as somebody who's non-religious, I'd be thrilled to be able to get hitched and say I'm in a civil union, not in a marriage, because the word "marriage" has always sounded very religious to me. But I appreciate that other non-religious people may not feel the same way about that word as I do.

------------------------------

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 4:17 AM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Quote:

I don't see it being necessarily elegant, considering that non-religious, heterosexual married couples are not necessarily going to be thrilled to have the word marriage taken away from them to be given to the religious only.
And I'm one of them. We were married by a judge, and we've been married for 30+ years thru thick and thin. (And considering our DD's brain damage at birth and hubby's health issues, there's been a lot of "thin".) We meant what we said about "for better or worse, in sickness and health...". I stack that against ANYONE who's been married by a cleric. Just 'cause religious peeps want to exclusivate the term marriage on the false premise that it's a "religious" institution doesn't mean they should.

---------------------------------
Let's party like its 1929.

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 4:41 AM

AGENTROUKA


Taken from the Wikipedia page on "Common-Law Marriage".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common-law_marriage

Some thoughts concerning marriage as a legal contract, not primarily a religious one... Look how recently the connection was even made legally necessary, between the legal and the religious aspect. That's hardly going back to the roots of the institution itself. Shows clearly that marriage is not by definition a religious institution.

Quote:

In medieval Europe, marriage came under the jurisdiction of canon law, which recognised as a valid marriage one where the parties stated that they took one another as wife and husband, even in absence of any witnesses.
The Council of Trent (convened 1545–1563) ruled that in future a marriage was only valid in Roman Catholic countries if it was witnessed by a priest of the Roman Catholic Church or, if obtaining a priest were impractical, by other witnesses. This ruling was not accepted in the newly Protestant nations of Europe, nor by Protestants who lived in Roman Catholic countries or their colonies in the Americas or elsewhere, nor by Eastern Orthodox Christians.
Common law marriages were abolished in England and Wales by the Marriage Act 1753. The Act required marriages to be performed by a priest of the Church of England – unless the participants in the marriage were Jews or Quakers. The Act applied to Ireland after the Act of Union 1800, but the requirement for a valid marriage to be performed by a Church of England priest created special problems in predominantly Roman Catholic Ireland. The law did not provide an exception.



And even then it created problems to make that connection between church and state.


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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 5:38 AM

PIZMOBEACH

... fully loaded, safety off...


It feels like we make some of these simple things way too complex. When we do that the next sound you hear is a stampede of siege lawyers and then it's gridlock.

I'm just guessing... gay couples want to show their commitment to each other through the tradition of "marriage" that is available to all citizens, and that they grew up with (like their parents and grandparents, etc) and to feel they have the same rights as any couple. "Civil Union" sounds like a door prize, it has none of the emotion and tradition that marriage has.

If churches don't want to do the ceremonies, fine. Let the ceremony that the state provides be called a "marriage by the State," and not a religious marriage. The people that care about the religious aspect will have their differentiation.

Same benefits, different place, and they can tell their friends, "We got married!"

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 6:48 AM

AGENTROUKA


This is, if I interpret correctly, exactly what pro-gay-marriage people want and opponents reject because the word "marriage" is involved.. or am I wrong?

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 7:19 AM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


I think you're right. Anti-gay marriage peeps don't want gays using the term "marriage" bc they feel it belongs to them.

---------------------------------
Let's party like its 1929.

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 7:22 AM

CANTTAKESKY


Quote:

So, how about next time you think of opening your stupid Pollock mouth.... Don't.
You've crossed the line Wulf. Slurs on ethnicity or national origin is just...gross. That is too much insane hatred.

I have no love for Rue, but she does not deserve racial/ethnic name-calling.



--------------------------
Dr. Horrible Karaoke


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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 7:33 AM

AGENTROUKA


Quote:

Originally posted by SignyM:
I think you're right. Anti-gay marriage peeps don't want gays using the term "marriage" bc they feel it belongs to them.

---------------------------------
Let's party like its 1929.




Yeah. I would really love to see a more thorough discussion about this particular aspect of the problem.



Dear People who who think the term "marriage" is a solely religious one,

why do you think this? Are you willing to discuss this logically? Or is it entirely an emotional investment you aren't willing to compromise on, and if so, how do you justify this?

Honestly curious and not looking for a flamewar,
AR

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 8:50 AM

STORYMARK


So, Wulf didn't have the courage after all...

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him."

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 9:03 AM

ELVISCHRIST


Quote:

we can wait for a couple more decades for enough bigots to die off from old age so that the people who are "liberal" on this are in the majority (after all, society progresses one funeral at a time).


LINE OF THE DAY!! "Society progresses one funeral at a time."

I love that.


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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 9:13 AM

PIZMOBEACH

... fully loaded, safety off...


Quote:

Originally posted by AgentRouka:
Quote:

Originally posted by SignyM:
I think you're right. Anti-gay marriage peeps don't want gays using the term "marriage" bc they feel it belongs to them.

---------------------------------
Let's party like its 1929.



Yeah. I would really love to see a more thorough discussion about this particular aspect of the problem.

Dear People who who think the term "marriage" is a solely religious one,

why do you think this? Are you willing to discuss this logically? Or is it entirely an emotional investment you aren't willing to compromise on, and if so, how do you justify this?



fwiw (and I suspect very little), m-webster does not use the word "religion," in it's definition of marry or marriage. Religion does not own that word.

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 10:34 AM

KHYRON


Quote:

Originally posted by AgentRouka:
Dear People who who think the term "marriage" is a solely religious one,

why do you think this? Are you willing to discuss this logically? Or is it entirely an emotional investment you aren't willing to compromise on, and if so, how do you justify this?

I hope this wasn't directed at me (amongst others), but it probably was. "Marriage" may not be defined in terms of religion, but it certainly has a religious connotation, at least where I come from. That's why I don't like the word. But fine, it's just a word and its connotation is subjective, if non-religious married people want to keep it then fair enough. However, if you recall, most people (religious or not) who argue against gay marriage argue against it because of what the word "marriage" means to them, and that gay marriage doesn't fit into their personal definition of marriage, so the entire discussion of the word is pretty subjective in the first place, regardless of what the dictionary says.

To the real discussion at hand, I still think the state should only allow civil unions (call them common-law marriages, then, or whatever) between any two consenting people not too closely related and old enough, just clearly distinguish the line between church and state on this issue, because in a lot of people's mind it's quite muddled, which is something the bigots are taking advantage of. Although keeping the word marriage for both cases won't help in making that distinction ...

Doing it this way wouldn't be pandering to the religious bigots, it would be pulling the rug out from under them and making their arguments obsolete.

------------------------------

What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 11:05 AM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!


Quote:

Originally posted by FutureMrsFIllion:

Banning gays from getting married IS treating them special - in a negative way.






No more than banning marriage between very close relatives, or polygamy. Say what you want, but merely asking that marriage be defined as 1 man + 1 woman is not, by any stretch of the imagination hateful , mean or discriminatory.



It is not those who use the term "Islamo-Fascism" who are sullying the name of Islam; it is the Islamo-Fascists. - Dennis Prager


" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 11:05 AM

AGENTROUKA


Quote:

Originally posted by Khyron:
I hope this wasn't directed at me (amongst others), but it probably was.



It wasn't aimed specifically at you! I'd really like to hear from anyone who holds that opinion.

Quote:


However, if you recall, most people (religious or not) who argue against gay marriage argue against it because of what the word "marriage" means to them, and that gay marriage doesn't fit into their personal definition of marriage, so the entire discussion of the word is pretty subjective in the first place, regardless of what the dictionary says.



So you don't think that asking them why they think their idea of marriage is the only one is a worthy pursuit?

I suspect the issue is greater than just gay marriage but encompasses also the concept of how much influence religion should have on civil matters.

Your solution is a practical one but it still constitutes a concession toward people who wrongfully claim a term that should belong to all. It's a question of pragmatism vs. the principle of the thing.

To use a really overdrawn analogy, if someone comes over and occupies your home, do you just move out? Sure, they are out of your hair, but your home is lost. And they'll feel completely justified in having occupied it in the first place. Is that a good solution?


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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 11:16 AM

AGENTROUKA


Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:
No more than banning marriage between very close relatives, or polygamy. Say what you want, but merely asking that marriage be defined as 1 man + 1 woman is not, by any stretch of the imagination hateful , mean or discriminatory.





All those are obviously discriminatory. To discriminate is, by itself, not a dirty word.

Banning incest marriages discriminates against incest. Banning polygamous marriages discriminates against polygamy. Banning gay marriage discriminates against homosexuality.

The real point here is whether the discrimination is appropriate.

The reason why discrimination is often treated as a dirty word is because so often things have been discriminated against for absolutely no good reason.


Is there a good reason to discriminate against homosexuality?

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 11:25 AM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Quote:

However, if you recall, most people (religious or not) who argue against gay marriage argue against it because of what the word "marriage" means to them, and that gay marriage doesn't fit into their personal definition of marriage, so the entire discussion of the word is pretty subjective in the first place, regardless of what the dictionary says.
But the discussion runs into a brick wall when you bring up the LEGAL aspects of marriage. Maybe "in theory" we could adopt different words to distiguish between religious "marriage" and civil "marriage" but in practice state laws, federal laws, insurance contracts etc. refer to the term marriage. Maybe there is a neat legal trick... a new law that says "In all past and future laws the term marriage refers to both a religious marriage and civil marriage, the civil marriage from here on in known as (fill in the blank)... but that would STILL require passing at least 50 state laws, a Federal Law, changing the tax code, changing Social Security regulation, and modifying numerous laws regarding probate, insurance contracts etc. And for what???

What the religious folks forget is the part that says "By the powers invested in me by the State I now pronounce you...."
Quote:

To the real discussion at hand, I still think the state should only allow civil unions (call them common-law marriages, then, or whatever) between any two consenting people not too closely related and old enough, just clearly distinguish the line between church and state on this issue, because in a lot of people's mind it's quite muddled
I think I've already made MY opinion on this pretty clear. I'm against peeps marrying into a situation where there is an inherent imbalance of capability: adults marrying children, NTs marrying retarded people, one person marrying many (puts the many in competition with each other).

But if two people want to commit to each other and trust each other with their worldly possessions, to have each other's backs and be able to grow old together... that's a beautiful thing. Why would I be against it??

But I'd like to hear what other people think about that.

---------------------------------
Let's party like its 1929.

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 11:29 AM

RUE

I have a vote and I'm not afraid to use it!


I'm with you.

I'd be curious as to who is against, and why, because --- I can't imagine why.

***************************************************************

Silence is consent.

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 11:55 AM

PONYXPRESSINC


This whole debate/argument seems very familiar...

Quote:

Originally posted by AgentRouka:
Taken from the Wikipedia page on "Common-Law Marriage".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common-law_marriage

Some thoughts concerning marriage as a legal contract, not primarily a religious one... Look how recently the connection was even made legally necessary, between the legal and the religious aspect. That's hardly going back to the roots of the institution itself. Shows clearly that marriage is not by definition a religious institution.

Quote:

In medieval Europe, marriage came under the jurisdiction of canon law, which recognised as a valid marriage one where the parties stated that they took one another as wife and husband, even in absence of any witnesses.
The Council of Trent (convened 1545–1563) ruled that in future a marriage was only valid in Roman Catholic countries if it was witnessed by a priest of the Roman Catholic Church or, if obtaining a priest were impractical, by other witnesses. This ruling was not accepted in the newly Protestant nations of Europe, nor by Protestants who lived in Roman Catholic countries or their colonies in the Americas or elsewhere, nor by Eastern Orthodox Christians.
Common law marriages were abolished in England and Wales by the Marriage Act 1753. The Act required marriages to be performed by a priest of the Church of England – unless the participants in the marriage were Jews or Quakers. The Act applied to Ireland after the Act of Union 1800, but the requirement for a valid marriage to be performed by a Church of England priest created special problems in predominantly Roman Catholic Ireland. The law did not provide an exception.



And even then it created problems to make that connection between church and state.



*Applauds loudly*

I found this a good read if you are interested, http://www.historycooperative.org/journals/lhr/17.1/leneman.html, it explains how the 1753 act came about.

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 12:06 PM

WHOZIT


http://www.lansingstatejournal.com/article/20081112/NEWS01/811120369 Gays are funny

I'm going to microwave a bagel and have sex with it - Peter Griffin

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Wednesday, November 12, 2008 12:09 PM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


"No more than banning marriage between very close relatives, or polygamy."

Hello,

For the record, I don't think that unions between adults of any stripe should be outlawed, regardless of relation or number. These Unions exist as an economic and legal construct, and should be blind to any question other than "Adult? Y/N." As such, any number of agreeable adults of any sex, any relation, any race, any ethnicity, and any orientation should be able to join in a Union.

I find it lamentable that the close-minded masses of the world have stamped the word 'marriage' with their moral and religious bias, but I would love nothing more than to rob the very term out from under them. And by all means let 10,000 lawyers argue for 10,000 days about eliminating 'marriage' from government. By the end of that sickening debacle, maybe people will be disgusted enough to remember not to let their personal narrow-minded opinions muddle the government process.

--Anthony

"Liberty must not be purchased at the cost of Humanity." --Captain Robert Henner

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Thursday, November 13, 2008 6:37 AM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Why.... that means we pretty much agree!

---------------------------------
Let's party like its 1929.

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Thursday, November 13, 2008 6:48 AM

RUE

I have a vote and I'm not afraid to use it!


I would add the caveat that it has to be voluntary - which probably goes without saying, but it seems like for completeness' sake it should be mentioned.

***************************************************************

Silence is consent.

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Thursday, November 13, 2008 7:07 AM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

Indeed: "As such, any number of agreeable adults..."

--Anthony

"Liberty must not be purchased at the cost of Humanity." --Captain Robert Henner

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Friday, November 14, 2008 3:30 AM

FREMDFIRMA


Saw this today, and just had to share it here.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/4748292.stm

A Sudanese man has been forced to take a goat as his "wife", after he was caught having sex with the animal.

The goat's owner, Mr Alifi, said he surprised the man with his goat and took him to a council of elders.

They ordered the man, Mr Tombe, to pay a dowry of 15,000 Sudanese dinars ($50) to Mr Alifi.

"We have given him the goat, and as far as we know they are still together," Mr Alifi said.

Mr Alifi, of Hai Malakal in Upper Nile State, told the Juba Post newspaper that he heard a loud noise around midnight on 13 February and immediately rushed outside to find Mr Tombe with his goat.

"When I asked him: 'What are you doing there?', he fell off the back of the goat, so I captured and tied him up."

Mr Alifi then called elders to decide how to deal with the case.

"They said I should not take him to the police, but rather let him pay a dowry for my goat because he used it as his wife," Mr Alifi told the newspaper.


Let's hear it for progressive town elders!

Of course, it woulda been a little nicer if they'd asked the Goat his/her opinion, however.

-F

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