CAPTION TIGHTPANTS #2 by TenthCrewMember

GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

CAPTION TIGHTPANTS #2

POSTED BY: TENTHCREWMEMBER
UPDATED: Wednesday, August 31, 2005 08:42
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VIEWED: 11771
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Sunday, November 14, 2004 7:19 AM

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Well, first let me say, you all have great imagination and it was difficult to choose, especially considering I did a spit take on one! So, without further jabber, here is the Week #1 winner...

Congrats, Wiccanslyr!

And now for this week's Caption Tightpants, we have a nice shot of Shephard Book, so have at 'em!

BOOK: "WHOA! Shouldn't we be in the infirmary for a hernial examination, Doctor?"

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 7:27 AM

CAPNRAHN

Duhrrr, which way did he go, Georg...errr Simon.

"Remember, there is only ONE absolute - There ARE NO absolutes!!!"

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 7:34 AM

DRAGONWINE

Book: Uuuumm, a paternity test? Is that really needed, I mean I never married you know!

It's a nothing part til you don't got one, then you have to go to ebay.....aaaaagh!

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 7:54 AM

MALICIOUS

"....uuurrrrpppp. Pay up, Doc. I just burped the entire alphabet and you said I couldn't."

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 7:55 AM

DARKJESTER

"Stop me if you've heard this one, doc. Jesus, two Jews and a leper walk into a bar......"

MAL "You only gotta scare him."
JAYNE "Pain is scary..."

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 10:22 AM

DAIKATH

Book:"Jayne, you know the Bible doesn't aprove of the place you are putting that Rainstick in."
Simon:"In all my years as a doctor I didn't know it could stretch that much."

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 11:08 AM

SUCCATASH

BOOK: "Wow, your hands are cold!"

SIMON: "Turn your head and cough."

"Gott kann dich nicht vor mir beschuetzen, weil ich nicht boese bin."

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 12:19 PM

JEBBYPAL

And then it turned out that Inara's client was a woman!

The Strawberry Monkey who defends tight pants everywhere!

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 1:30 PM

BARCLAY

"And you should have seen the size of the scripture she was carrying!"

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 1:47 PM

MANIACNUMBERONE

Book: "You know... from behind, you kind of remind me of a young man at the abbey I used to um, know."

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 2:29 PM

MANIACNUMBERONE

Book: The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."
The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 3:13 PM

SUCCATASH

Book: "...and THAT's the story of how I became more or less intact."

Simon (thinking): Note to self: Never ask about Book's past.

"Gott kann dich nicht vor mir beschuetzen, weil ich nicht boese bin."

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 3:37 PM

BLINKER

BOOK: ALLLLLLLrighty then! [pause] Do NOT!...go in there.
SIMON: Oh! Do Roseanne again!

_________
Sliders: Gate Haven - http://slidersweb.net/blinker

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 4:05 PM

SUCCATASH

Book: "I told you so! Yours IS bigger."

"Gott kann dich nicht vor mir beschuetzen, weil ich nicht boese bin."

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Sunday, November 14, 2004 5:33 PM

SUCCATASH

Book: "Oh... I'm afraid the deflector shield will be quite operational when your friends arrive..."

"Gott kann dich nicht vor mir beschuetzen, weil ich nicht boese bin."

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Monday, November 15, 2004 12:43 AM

MANTICHORUS

BOOK: "Excuse me doctor, do you have anything for constipation?"

Or, alternatively...

BOOK: "Excuse me doctor, do you have anything for diarrhoea?"

Toilet humour... Well sophisticated here.

EDIT - Another idea...
BOOK: "What do you mean, I look like a fish?"
--------------------------------------------------
"To do just the opposite is also a form of imitation." -Georg Christoph Lichtenberg, Aphorisms.
--------------------------------------------------
"Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact." -George Eliot, Impressions of Theophrastus Such.

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Monday, November 15, 2004 2:21 AM

COSMICFUGITIVE

BOOK: "...and that's not an easy thing for a ninety year old shepherd to do you know..."

SIMON: (Thinking) *Shoot me now. PLEASE!*

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Monday, November 15, 2004 4:35 AM

BEENWITHAWARRIORWOMAN

Book: Simon, you gotta see this!! Jayne's mom sent him another hat!

EDIT: I quickly realized it would be much funnier this way:

Simon: Shepherd Book, you gotta come quick! Jayne's mom sent him another hat!
Book: Lead the way!

Or maybe the first one was funnier... Take your pick.

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Monday, November 15, 2004 5:02 AM

ZOID

BOOK: "So, Barney says, 'Aw, c'mon, Ange! Why can't I have more'n one bullet?' And Sheriff Taylor says, 'You keep that in your shirt pocket, now, Barney, or I'll take your gun away!' And then..."

SIMON (Thinking): You are so old!

Archaically,

zed

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Monday, November 15, 2004 8:06 AM

UNCHARTEDOUTLAW

Book: Okay, okay, here's my Bill Cosby impersonation: 'Mmmm, okay, so I want to tell you 'bout deez pudding pops.'

Simon (thinking): Bill who?

-Taylor

The Uncharted Outlaw!
"I brought you some supper, but if you'd prefer a lecture, I've a few very catchy ones prepped...sin and hellfire... one has lepers."
See my Firefly Store: http://www.cafepress.com/NorCalRiviera

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Monday, November 15, 2004 10:38 AM

ODDNESS2HER

Book: So then I told him about the SPECIAL Hell.

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Monday, November 15, 2004 11:03 AM

TUDYKRAWKS

Simon: thanx for helping me figure that out Book
Book: (in high voice) Yeah i guess squeezing does give men a high voice..... please let go!

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Monday, November 15, 2004 1:05 PM

NEEDLESEYE

Quote:

Book: Simon, I think you should know. Your sister is running through the ship with an apple, and Kaylee is chasing her.

Simon: So, what's the problem?

Book: This time... she's naked.

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Monday, November 15, 2004 1:21 PM

BILLYUNO

Book: "*snicker* Don't look now... but the captain is standing just outside the hatch behind you... and he's NAKED"

Simon: "Really?"

Book: "Hee hee... yes, but don't look!"

(Because Book looks like he's trying not to laugh.)

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Monday, November 15, 2004 1:57 PM

VETERAN

Don't squat with your spurs on.

Book: Heavens, umm... er, I mean really it's not that big at all. Nobody will even notice. But, perhaps your sister could lend you some Clearasil.

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Monday, November 15, 2004 4:10 PM

THEGREYJEDI

Quote:

Book: The Almighty says he can get me out of this mess, but He's pretty sure you're f**ked.

100 points to anyone who can tell me what that line is from, and another 50 if you can name each of the two characters involved.*

*points don't mean anything.

--------------------------------------------------
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com

http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices

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Monday, November 15, 2004 4:35 PM

BEENWITHAWARRIORWOMAN

Duh.
Braveheart is the movie. William Wallace is f*cked (I hate that, I'd rather write out the word btw) and Prince Stephen of Ireland is the speaker. Great line.

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Monday, November 15, 2004 6:11 PM

SUCCATASH

"You know, when I was your age, I ate girls like Kaylee for breakfast."

"Gott kann dich nicht vor mir beschuetzen, weil ich nicht boese bin."

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Monday, November 15, 2004 6:32 PM

THEGREYJEDI

200 completely pointless points to Beenwithawarriorwoman!

--------------------------------------------------
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com

http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices

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Monday, November 15, 2004 6:44 PM

GOJIRO

BOOK: "You can call me Ray, or you can call me Jay, or you can call my Ray-Jay, but you can't call me -- er -- well, that's all I can recall."

SIMON: "No wonder it became Earth That Was."

-------
Are you a Southern Ohio Browncoat? If so, join our Yahoo group for news and events: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly-ohio/

And if you're a Cincinnati Area Browncoat, join our meetup group at http://firefly.meetup.com/137/

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Monday, November 15, 2004 8:01 PM

ANOTHERFIREFLYFAN

"You really WERE Bozo the Clown before being a Shepherd" "Hey, clowns know about crime too"

Keep flying

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Tuesday, November 16, 2004 3:49 AM

BEENWITHAWARRIORWOMAN

Book: When a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist and a round thing in your face, you get sprung, know what I'm saying?

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Tuesday, November 16, 2004 9:57 AM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

(so I play my own game...it is fun! I can't win, but I enjoy playing...)

BOOK: So I say to the Cap'n, "Shan Yu's writing is just sadistic crap justified by florid prose! And he says..."
SIMON (THINKING): That was *my* line you hwoon dan...

Cilantro!
TCM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Show your Browncoat pride! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more for sale at
http://www.zazzle.com/contributors/home/default.asp?cid=23847914695881
5760
AND
http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew

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Tuesday, November 16, 2004 11:04 AM

GRRARRG

What other question could prompt that kind of an embarassed cringe?

Book: "You see, Doctor, due to the traditions of my order, I wasn't . . . well, I've been getting these infections, and . . . have you ever performed a . . . circumcision?"

I mock you with my monkey pants

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Tuesday, November 16, 2004 12:17 PM

GUNRUNNER

Book: "...So it turns out she was a he!!"

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Tuesday, November 16, 2004 6:03 PM

PUMAMANREDUX

Book: I remember a preacher once said, 'Nobody goes to hell unless they really want to.' I ended up here because I really wanted to.

Simon doesn't say a word

****************************************

couldn't resist posting this quote when I was searching for quotes at imdb.com with the word hell in them .. found the above was from a film called The Bounty Killer

http://imdb.com/Quotes?0058988

************************************************
'Trust me - I know what I'm doing!' - Sledge Hammer
**************
http://www.freewebs.com/mjspages/tempfireflypage.htm

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Wednesday, November 17, 2004 12:01 AM

DECKROID

Book: You can get a good look at a T-bone steak by sticking your head up a butcher's ass... No, wait. It's gotta be your bull.

Doctor: Wow.

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Wednesday, November 17, 2004 6:10 AM

GORAMSHINY

Book: While I agree the Captain should try some looser pants Doctor perhaps there's a better way to show him why.

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Wednesday, November 17, 2004 6:13 AM

ZOID

DeckRoid:

Heh-heh... "Tommy Boy".

v/r,
zed
("Bees! Bees!..." or "I don't remember eating that!" or "Eres tu!" or... God, I miss Chris; that's gonna leave a mark)

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Thursday, November 18, 2004 12:47 PM

the movie is not the Series. Only the facts have been changed, to irritate the innocent; the names of the actors and characters remain the same

Quote:
Originally posted by TheGreyJedi:
Quote:

Book: The Almighty says he can get me out of this mess, but He's pretty sure you're f**ked.

100 points to anyone who can tell me what that line is from, and another 50 if you can name each of the two characters involved.*

Without reading ahead . . .
Braveheart
the manic Irish mercenary (canna recall his name)
speaking to William Wallace

Keep the Shiny Side Up

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Thursday, November 18, 2004 1:04 PM

the movie is not the Series. Only the facts have been changed, to irritate the innocent; the names of the actors and characters remain the same

Quote:
Originally posted by gojiro:
BOOK: You can call me Ray, or you can call me Jay,

or you can call me Johnny, or you can call me Junior,

Quote:
or you can call my Ray-Jay,

or you can call me RJ, or you can call me RJJ, or you can call me RJJ,Junior. But ya doesn't has ta call my Johnson.

SIMON: I'm sorry, how old is that joke?

BOOK: 590 years old, next week.

Keep the Shiny Side Up

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Thursday, November 18, 2004 1:20 PM

the movie is not the Series. Only the facts have been changed, to irritate the innocent; the names of the actors and characters remain the same

duplicate

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Thursday, November 18, 2004 1:59 PM

NIKNAK

SIMON: I've decided on second thought to accept my sister's proposal of marriage.

(reference to deleted scene from "Our Mrs Reynolds" in the DVD special features).

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Friday, November 19, 2004 4:16 AM

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Could you please just make it stranger? Stranger. Odder. Could be weirder. More bizarre. How about uncanny?

Wow! Another great selection of captions!
Looks like I'll be up late picking a winner tomorrow, so there is still today and tomorrow to post your best caption for this screencap!

I guess as long as I am here...

BOOK: "Ever seen Kaylee eat a strawberry? Hooboy!"

Cilantro!
TCM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Show your Browncoat pride! I have original (meaning: designed by me!)
T-shirts, posters, mugs and more for sale at
http://www.zazzle.com/contributors/home/default.asp?cid=23847914695881
5760
AND
http://www.cafepress.com/10thcrew

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Friday, November 19, 2004 6:55 AM

GEEZER

Keep the Shiny side up

Simon: "No, Shepherd. I said take one a day for ten days, not all ten in one day. So, ever had your stomach pumped before?"

"Keep the Shiny side up"

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Friday, November 19, 2004 7:09 AM

COSMICFUGITIVE

Based on the song 'United States of Whatever' by Liam Lynch:

BOOK: "Then I'm throwing dice in the Abbey. Shepherd Leroy comes up and is, like,'Hey, I thought I told you...' And I'm, like..."

SIMON: (Thinking) *Yeah, whatever!*

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Wednesday, August 31, 2005 5:47 AM

NOX2HED

Doc, you said to cough when you squeezed my balls,. . . but that’s not my balls.

_ _ _ _ _
One of us is crazy, and it's not you!

Help! I'm standing and I can't fall down.

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Wednesday, August 31, 2005 8:42 AM

KAYLEERULESALL

Simon: Okay preacher. I'm on a mission from my sister. That hair's coming off one way or another. (brandishes scissors) We can do it the easy way, or the hard way...

------------------------------------------------
When the stars shine bright through the engine's trail and the dust of another world drops behind; When my ship is free of the open sky, its a damn good day to my way of mind; Theres a barren planet you never can leave, theres a rocky valley where we lost a war; Theres a cross worn 'round a soldier's neck, theres a man's faith died on Serenity's floor, but i stood my ground and ill fight once more; Its the last oath that i ever swore

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