A thread dedicated strictly to Mal-licious by BadgersHat

* The Real Me is tearing apart his kitchen... *

Pots...

Pans...

Cookie sheet...

OH! HERE!

No, just a crock pot...

* It begins to dawn on the The Real Me that he really doesn't know what a ramekin is (a tiny rame?), and all these blowtorch things perplex him. Moreover, he doesn't really even know what Creme Burlee is, aside from Mal-licious' hair color. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you.)

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Wednesday, January 19, 2005 8:28 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Hardware:
Not that it mattered to me, but Alton approved.

Thats what I was gonna say.

------------

You should see the DLX in action, oh man it's shiny!!

-Ratboy

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Wednesday, January 19, 2005 8:31 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
It begins to dawn on the The Real Me that he really doesn't know what a ramekin is (a tiny rame?)

Think nut bowl!

-Ratboy

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 4:56 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Rat:
Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
It begins to dawn on the The Real Me that he really doesn't know what a ramekin is (a tiny rame?)

Think nut bowl!

-Ratboy

What? Well, okay...

* The Real Me unleashes his powers of concentration, and mutters to himself: *

nut bowl... nut bowl... nut bowl...

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you.)

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 7:53 AM

* Suddenly, there came a flash light, and a ramekin filled with salted nuts appears on the table before TheRealHim! *

-Ratboy

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 10:44 AM

RHYMEPHILE

Since this thread seems to be spiralling toward food-associated insanity,

Mmmmmmmm, cookies. And anything chocolate-related.

And let it be known that Mizz Licious gets first dibs on my ever-expanding DVD auction collection, just because she came back and stuff. An' cuz she has purty hair.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I've seen life on this planet, Scully, and that's precisely why I'm looking elsewhere."

-- Fox Mulder, The X-Files

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 11:34 AM

Rhyme!

Thanks for getting this thread steered back in the proper direction. You and Zoid are among the second most important people in this entire thread.

(Mal-Licious concentrates as well)

"nut jobs...nut jobs...nut jobs..."

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 11:43 AM

HARDWARE

Quote:
Originally posted by Malicious:

(Mal-Licious concentrates as well)

"nut jobs...nut jobs...nut jobs..."

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

Nut jobs? Sounds like a euphemism for an intimate act between consenting squirrels!

The more I get to know people the more I like my dogs.

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 2:22 PM

EMBERS

bumping Mal-licious' thread...
offering penance for reading it so late
(it is one VERY long thread,
what with the cheese
and the mud...)

and offering a game (cartoon by Jade Gordon):
http://jigzone.com/ms/z.php?ui=620911392i1694838&z=20_piece_classic

I hope the offering is sufficient,
Sincerely,
Maribeth (embers)

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 6:29 PM

Embers!

You are hereby absolved. Go forth and say 20 Hail Mal-Licious's yadda yadda and you'll be good to go.

Peas be with you. Even though I am not fond of vegetables.

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 6:41 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by The Real Me:
* The Real Me unleashes his powers of concentration, and mutters to himself: *

nut bowl... nut bowl... nut bowl...

Quote:
Originally posted by Rat:
* Suddenly, there came a flash light, and a ramekin filled with salted nuts appears on the table before TheRealHim! *
-Ratboy

* The Real Me is very surprised by the nut bowl that apparently materialized out of thin air. He grabs a handful of nuts and starts munching on them. The Real Me wonders if he has acquired a new superpower? Suddenly, inspiration hits The Real Me. He closes his eyes tightly and starts muttering: *

A human woman who is: intelligent, witty, creative, understanding, heterosexual, unattached, attractive, rich, and interested in The Real Me!

A human woman who is: intelligent, witty, creative, understanding, heterosexual, unattached, attractive, rich, and interested in The Real Me!

* The Real Me opens one eye to peek. *

Dammit! Just a bowl full of nuts!

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you.)

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 9:14 PM

* Then from behind TheRealHim, a female reaver appears! *

* She looks vary "interested" in TheRealHim! *

-Ratboy

edit- Sorry, thats the best I can do.

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Thursday, January 20, 2005 11:39 PM

ZOID

TheRealMe wrote:

Quote:
...A human woman who is: intelligent, witty, creative, understanding, heterosexual, unattached, attractive, rich, and interested in The Real Me!

You forgot, "...who's the heiress to the Jack Daniels fortune, her Daddy owns a Porsche dealership (censored for family audience), and has a bottle opener in her ear."

Let me know if it works. I've got a couple snowball's-chance-in-hell wishes, too.

*zoid begins chanting, just in case, 'an altruistic politician, an altruistic politician, an altruistic politician'*

Wishfully,

zoid

P.S.
And apparently Rat has managed to find the only attractive female reaver for you; so, good luck with the wedding plans. I'd watch out for the buffet table at the reception; I understand the 'lady fingers' taste like pork...
_________________________________________________

"Burn the land and boil the sea, you can't take the sky from me." The Ballad of Serenity

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Friday, January 21, 2005 6:10 AM

An altruistic politician? PLEASE, Zoid! At least it was POSSIBLE that what I wished for could exist.

Quote:
Originally posted by Rat:
* Then from behind TheRealHim, a female reaver appears! *

* She looks vary "interested" in TheRealHim! *

-Ratboy

edit- Sorry, thats the best I can do.

* The Real Me regards the FemaleReaver *

Hmmmm... well, if her only significant flaw is cannibalism...

GREETINGS! FemaleReaver! Welcome!

Hmmmmm... If I take her back to the Sereni-TREE, I'd have to keep her from eating my friends. Perhaps if I kept her strapped down to a...

But no, that would be a bit kinky for this site. And there are some who might still blame me for Inola Teg, since she followed me home from the Purple Dimension. They'd think that FemaleReaver was just continuing the trend of my bringing back dangerous females who attempt to eat us.

* The Real Me comes to a decision. He turns back to FemaleReaver, who is still disoriented. *

No, I'm sorry, dear. Our relationship just could not work. But here!

* The Real Me grabs Rat and pushes him toward FemaleReaver. *

This is my good friend Rat. I'm sure you'll have a lot to discuss... over dinner!

* The Real Me opens a hole in reality and disappears inside it. The hole closes behind him. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you.)

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Friday, January 21, 2005 11:49 AM

* Rat ponders for a moment then scurrys away in terror! *

-Ratboy

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Friday, January 21, 2005 2:09 PM

(Mal-Licious tosses some creme brulee at the FemaleReaver in an attempt to keep her from following Rat)

Here you go, hon. Eat some of this! It's hardly got any anti-freeze in it at all.....

(Mal-Licious stands back, arms crossed, nodding with satisfaction)

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Friday, January 21, 2005 3:01 PM

* The FemaleReaver ignores the offered crème burlee, since it (most probably?) does not contain human flesh as one if its main ingredients. As the FemaleReaver leaps toward Rat, mayhem in her eyes, a spot of light appears at Rat’s feet. It expands, to become a circle of fire surrounding a dark void. As FemaleReaver reaches out for Rat, grabs him, and opens her mouth wide for a bite, they both fall through this hole in reality, much surprised. *

* From the other side of this dimensional portal, there comes a smacking sound, a thud, and The Real Me’s voice can be heard to echo: *

Ebo Golem! Grab her! Don’t let her get loose! Good! Here Rat, let me help you up. Sorry about the ruse I involved you in, but I wanted her to be distracted.

* From the other side of the portal, FemaleReaver can be heard to howl, incoherent with rage. *

* Before long, The Real Me pokes up through the still-open dimensional portal in the floor. He blinks and shakes his head. *

Whew! Dis-orienting!

* The Real Me is holding a crowbar. He climbs through, a bit wobbly, and goes over to the exact spot where he had been standing when the bowl of nuts and the FemaleReaver had appeared. The Real Me uses the crowbar to pry up some of the floorboards from that spot. He examines a piece of wood he ripped out as he strolls back to the dimensional portal. *

Hmmmm.. Just as I thought! A magical wish-granting plank! Oh, well, back to the Treehouse ship!

* With a hop, The Real Me (with the plank tucked under one arm) jumps down into the hole in reality and it closes behind him. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you.)

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Friday, January 21, 2005 5:39 PM

Hi ya, Malicious! I can't believe it's been over a month since I've been here! How you been? Up to no good I see, with the hijacking and all. I thought I taught you better than that!

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Friday, January 21, 2005 6:50 PM

We'r like kids playing in an abandond warehouse, I think a new Mal-licious thread is ready for hijacking!!

-Ratboy

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 10:11 AM

THATWEIRDGIRL

Mom? Is that you? Oh, Mom, we've missed you so much.

We made a thread for you and everything. http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=8575

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 10:16 AM

MOM!

Missed ya! Only 3 and 1/2 months until my half-birthday!

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 11:13 AM

PETITRHINO

Dear Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell,

I just found this thread and thought I should post something. Reading your posts is always an honor that flatters my... honor.

Yours fireflyingly,

Flo

PS: Happy non-birthday!

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 1:10 PM

Why thank you!

Your honor flatters my honor more.

And happy non-birthday to you as well. Unless it IS your birthday, then happy that!

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 3:14 PM

>>Mom? Is that you? Oh, Mom, we've missed you so much.<<

That's so sweet, I've missed you too! Thanks for directing me to that thread!

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 3:17 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Malicious:
MOM!

Missed ya! Only 3 and 1/2 months until my half-birthday!

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

May 19th, May 19th, May 19th...right?? Maybe you should start on your wish list! Something like:

1. World peace
2. Mal
3. Mal naked!

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 3:50 PM

COZEN

Quote:
Originally posted by Elwoodmom:
Quote:
Originally posted by Malicious:
MOM!

Missed ya! Only 3 and 1/2 months until my half-birthday!

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

May 19th, May 19th, May 19th...right?? Maybe you should start on your wish list! Something like:

1. World peace
2. Mal
3. Mal naked!

Not necessarily in that order, of course.

***
It's not my birthday, either....

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 3:56 PM