The Treehouse Gala Pageant That Loads Faster! by Malicious

I'm just posting this because my computer's been acting weird all afternoon, and I want to see if my page will update if I post.

Oh, and I'm also starting to get woozy from my headband. TRM, is it safe to take off or will I have to wrestle it into submission?

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

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Saturday, January 29, 2005 9:43 PM

MAI

"I think that those of us not in the "bizzare dress" contest need to vote for one of those individuals who are actually participating, in order to show our appreciation for the effort they are expending."

*Mai enters common room still dressed in amazingly shiny dress of leaves*

ATTENTION PLEASE! As a contestant in the bizarre dress contest I would like a chance to explain my ensemble to the voters.

First, I chose to make the dress of material of leaves in reverence to the Tree House. What better way to express my love of for this unique gathering place (and its even more unique inhabitants).

Secondly, its good for the environment! It's recycling fallen leaves without all the hassle of composting!

Lastly, because of this contest, I have decided to start my own environmentally friendly clothing line.
The dress I am sporting is merely a preview of what I have deemed the Fall Foliage Collection. All proceeds from the sale of this line, of course going directly back to the Tree House, for basic upkeep, booze, and replacement of furniture and such things that tend to be broken a lot, etc...

Revered members of the tree house thank you for valuable time.

*Mai bows gracefully to the audience* It appears the leaves are beginning to wilt and oh my...
Ummm, I'll be right back. I have to go and find some fresh leaves to make a new more umm "healthy" dress.
*shuffles backwards out of room very slowly*

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Saturday, January 29, 2005 10:36 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by montanagirl:

Oh, and I'm also starting to get woozy from my headband. TRM, is it safe to take off or will I have to wrestle it into submission?

* The Real Me pauses on the way to his room. *

Right. Of course. Here, allow me to help.

* The Real Me comes near MontanaGirl. He shifts all three palm fronds to one set of hands while his other pair slowly approach the two waving ribbons of MontanaGirl's headband. Suddenly, he grabs them. They react violently, like snakes being grabbed on some Discovery Channel show. The Real Me twists them about so that only the center of the ribbon is attached to MontanaGirl's forehead, but it seems stuck there. The Real Me smiles. *

Persistent little thing, isn't it?

* The Real Me drops the palm fronds and pushes against MontanaGirl's shoulders with two of his hands while pulling the ribbon ends with his other two. The ribbon lets go, and The Real Me goes tumbling backward. He quickly hops up. The ribbon seems dead in his hands. He stuffs it into a drinking glass and hands it over. *

Since I keyed it to you, it will always try to attach to you when you touch it. If you keep it in that glass, it will just sit there. If you need help putting it on later, just let me know. You could also try wearing it on an arm, leg, or your torso. Good day!

* The Real Me picks up his palm fronds and heads off toward his room. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Saturday, January 29, 2005 10:43 PM

* The Real Me pauses again, and turns toward Mai. He claps with two of his hands. *

Thank you, Mai. That dress is an excellent idea! You know, if you need more raw materials, we have a dimensional portal set up in the boiler room that takes you to Zoid's Pub at the Bottom of the Tree. You could get more leaves from the Tree.

Now, if you will all excuse me for a short time, I need to get out of this attire.

* The Real Me indicates the numerous ribbons floating around his form. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Saturday, January 29, 2005 11:13 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by montanagirl:

*montanagirl goes in back and changes into almost floor length silvery slinky dress. It is complimented with an Evenstar necklace and silver dangly earrings. Unfortunately there are no shoes to go along with it, so she goes ahead and wears her cowboy boots.*

So guys, whadda ya think?

Uh...

Are the cowboy boots color-coordinated with the slinkly, silvery elven gown?

Also, those would more properly be called cowGIRL boots, right?

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 1:38 AM

MAI

Ok, so to be honest the dimensional portal thingy scares me a little. How exactly does it work? I really am in desperate need of more leaves, vines, and flowers. Ok, I guess a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. So, I am going to brave and just jump right in, but first...

If I don't return it probably means I have been sucked into some scary alternate dimension and am helplessly lost.
Of course, it also could mean that I got "sidetracked" at Zoid's Pub and am too sloshed to find my back up to the Tree House.
Either way, if I am not back within the hour, could someone please come and look for me?

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 4:06 AM

*checks watch*

Uh oh.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 7:55 AM

* The Real Me returns to his suite of rooms, dead tired. He has done his best in this pageant, but that is over, now. As he closes the door behind him, he begins to pull off the clinging ribbons of black cloth and drops them to the floor, where they wiggle for a time. He needs the help of the Ebo Golem to remove some of the more persistent pieces of fabric from his body. *

Ebo Golem, please gather these up, fold them neatly, and place them in my dresser. Hmmmm… how am I going to launder them? They’re likely to get irritated and attempt to escape the washing machine. Hmmm... is it even SAFE to launder them? I guess I ought to read the instructions.

* The Real Me shrugs, then sticks the bases of the three palm fronds in a bucket of water to try to keep them fresh. Next, The Real Me goes to his laboratory. He unbuckles the cybernetic harness that allows him to use Sparky’s two robotic arms as his own. Then, he carefully detaches those arms from the harness and returns them to his workbench with the rest of Sparky. *

Heh. THAT was a good trick.

* Then he takes a quick shower and gets dressed in a t-shirt and jeans, ready for whatever happens next. *

Hmmm… maybe it’s time for me to see if our butterfly thrusters really ARE breeding…

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 8:14 AM

* The Real Me returns from his room, showered, refreshed, and in a new change of clothes (and with only two arms). He stops when he notices a worried look on the face of SimonWho. *

Doctor, what’s wrong?

* SimonWho shakes his head gravely and points to the last couple of posts. The Real Me reads. *

Hmmmm… Mai is missing? This could be serious. I shall investigate!

* As The Real Me departs, he sort of wishes that SimonWho would stop wearing that “vampy” dress, now that the pageant is over. It’s down-right unsettling! On his way to the boiler room that contains the permanent dimensional portal to Zoid’s Pub at the Bottom of the Tree, The Real Me notices Cozen relaxing in a jacuzzi. *

Huh! When did we get one of those?

* In the boiler room, The Real Me makes a frightening discovery. A vandal or saboteur has ripped out some of the critical steam pipes used to maintain and stabilize the permanent portal. The portal itself is wobbling in four of its eleven dimensions and is about to implode! With great effort, The Real Me uses his own powers to slowly shut the portal down, dimension by dimension.

Whew! THAT was close.

* The Real Me then realizes with some shock that if Mai went through the portal while it was in that state, then she could be ANYWHERE! Or ANYWHEN! *

Well, there are a couple of obvious places to check.

* The Real Me opens one of his personal dimensional portals onto Zoid’s Pub at the Bottom. He sticks his upper body through it. *

Hello! Mai? Hey, Zoid! Have you seen Mai?

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 8:31 AM

COSMICFUGITIVE

*A slither of white light appears in the middle of the treehouse. It slowly expands, growing brighter. Suddenly CosmicFugitive falls to the floor, still wearing his red dress (which is now ripped in several places and covered in multicoloured paint) and looking a mite startled.*

Gah! Get back! Don't look at their heads! They wobble!...

*He hugs his knees into his chest. He looks through a curtain of long, tangled, hair and checks his surroundings. Suddenly his eyes widen.*

Whothahwhattahawaddawhattawhit? Where am I?! What time is it?!

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 8:32 AM

COSMICFUGITIVE

*CF looks down at his arms and ripped dress. He shakes his arms allowing the paint to splash onto the floor. He looks up, noticing everyone staring down at him.*

Gou zao de! *Sigh*

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 10:31 AM

Thanks for the help TRM! I love my headband/armband/whatever-you-want-to-call-it-band (I'm really going to have to come up with a better name for it), but everything was starting to get fuzzy there for a while. Now he's happily sitting in his glass drinking some Pepsi I gave him. Who knew that he'd like Pepsi too?

Unfortunately, my boots don't actually match my dress. I don't have any grey boots, only black ones. But my black boots are so comfy that I didn't want to take a chance with a new, possibly uncomfortable, pair.

Hey, I haven't seen Mai in a while. Do we need to organize a search party?

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 10:59 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:

Who are you? You are Mal-licious, a queen and a goddess who likes to hijack threads and bonk people on the head with your scepter.

Oh. Ok.

Do people bow to me as well? Yes? Wow. Thats pretty damn cool.

So, um, tread hijacking eh? How does that work? Do i force ya'all to talk about pineapples or what?

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 11:44 AM

Does this mean I'M Ebo now? Or what? I'm confused. This is like the time Maryanne thought she was Ginger.

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 11:51 AM

Oh hey! Do i get to co-hold the red ball thing too? Does that mean i finaly get to find out what the red ball thing is? This is very exciting.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 11:56 AM

COZEN

*s-l-o-w-l-y awakens from ongoing visions revolving around Mai's unleaved posterior*

This site is rapidly losing its PG rating....

An open missive to Sereni-Treehousers, esp. TheRealMe, technomagician extrordinaire.

Heya, TRM. Can I call you "The"?. I will anyway, pending respect gained through experiential maturity.
IMHO, you deserved the Misster Treehouse prize. Though I may have, debatably, expended slighlty more energy upon the competition -- the improved pool table, the jacuzzi-needing-water, the over-burdened creditcard

-- in retrospect it is clear that your methodology was, in every way, honorable. Heck,even altruistic. My methods, maybe not so much. As for SimonWho, calling upon the Brit Royal Fam'ly's aid somehow crossed a proprietal line: political connexions

, how gauche!
Anyway, The, it was naive of us to assume Mal-L wouldn't somehow usurp the title. She is, after all, a goddess. They can do these things, and are entitled to do so. We, ie., the minions, can only be enthralled by our fortune to have even touched upon her presence.
My heartfelt thanks to Ebo: you can have your mind back now. (BTW: share with us every nuance, every pore, all aspects of MB's entry in your life). To KGB: Never sure if I got yer vote, but it was, um, interesting picking off that wad o' gum.

To montanagirl: I done run out of Noxema... got any? Oh, if and only if I find a largish snake that has very naturally expired of old age, or croaked from indigestion because s/he consummed too many Rats

would you mind if I recycled said creature into snakeskin boots?

The, sorry about the missing plumbing. I never dreamed that such old tech could be utilized in the making of dimensional portals. Speaking of which, ya want help in searching for Mai, I'll take my chances and leap thru one of them openings.

*****
Losing pageants induces the positive attribute of enabling truthsomeness.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 12:06 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by ebonezer:
Oh hey! Do i get to co-hold the red ball thing too? Does that mean i finaly get to find out what the red ball thing is? This is very exciting.

Ohh, POOR Ebo! SimonWho, can't you give her any of those drugs River was on? Or do a holo-scan on her brain? See if there is one? (

)

The red BELL (rhymes with "hell?") was the device used to ring-in to answer a question during Firefly Jeopardy at the PA Shindig, back in October. The reason it was from hell is because it made us get the answers wrong. See? It weren't US who were stupid, it were the BELL.

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 1:26 PM

Hmm.

*gives ebo drugs*

Aha. Aha. Mmmmm.

*gives ebo more drugs*

Hmmm. Ah.

*gives ebo different drugs*

Okay, let me see...

*gulps*

Er...

*gives ebo shot of adrenaline to the heart*

Ebo?

*checks for vital signs*

Oh dear. This isn't going to look good on my permenant medical history. I hear they put down a slightly sarcastic comment you when you do this for the twentieth time.

Alas poor Ebo, farewell sweet princess and repeats of Angel send thee to thy rest.

*in the background, ebo sits bolt upright*

What was...

ARGH! WHAT THE!!! ARGH!

Oh. Oh dear. The ebo golem. I forgot about the ebo golem. Stupid thing, lacking in vital signs and higher levels of intelligence. Ebo? The real ebo? Where are you?

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 1:35 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by cozen:
To montanagirl: I done run out of Noxema... got any? Oh, if and only if I find a largish snake that has very naturally expired of old age, or croaked from indigestion because s/he consummed too many Rats would you mind if I recycled said creature into snakeskin boots?

I've got some more Noxema in my room. Sorry about the makeup job

. I guess I wasn't really thinking ahead to having to remove it. That's what you get with me helping you out

.

Oooh, snakeskin boots! If you do happen to find said snake, I would be consumed with delight upon receiving a pair of snakeskin boots. Then I can pretend I'm a badass chick. (Right now, not so much.)

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 2:43 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Malicious:

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

Has it always said Bell?

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 3:33 PM

COZEN

Quote:
I can pretend I'm a badass chick.

I struggle mightily to avoid responding with a clever sarcastic quip.

*alas, fails*

Okay, let me get this right. You want there to be something wrong with your ass.

*gives up forever, yet again, trying to figure out women*

Well, if snakeskin boots are what it takes to ruin yer bum, who am I to not help?

*calls up Ebo's CRS, who's all flush with back pay. CRS hangs up on ex-employer. Dials Russian pilot*

*thwop thwop thwop thwopthwopthwop (etc.). Conscious folk dive for cover. Unconcsious folk take their chances. Comfy chair lowered by cable, cozen climbs in, rises up up up. Begins singing, in key of not-quite-there b-flat, a poem badly.*

Off I go to the land
Of freshly expired snakes.
So that I can lend a hand
In ruining bumcakes.

*'copter noise saves Treehouse gang the horror of further drivel*

*****

! Forgot to ask what size....

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 3:54 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by CosmicFugitive:
*A slither of white light appears in the middle of the treehouse. It slowly expands, growing brighter. Suddenly CosmicFugitive falls to the floor, still wearing his red dress (which is now ripped in several places and covered in multicoloured paint) and looking a mite startled.*

Gah! Get back! Don't look at their heads! They wobble!...

*He hugs his knees into his chest. He looks through a curtain of long, tangled, hair and checks his surroundings. Suddenly his eyes widen.*

Whothahwhattahawaddawhattawhit? Where am I?! What time is it?!

Doctor SimonWho! Here is another one!

* The Real Me examines CosmicFugitive. As he recalls, CosmicFugitive has not been seen since near the start of the gala pageant. *

Heads that wobble?

Where have YOU been? Are you all right? I guess the rest of us assumed that you had been napping in your room all this time.

* The Real Me looks up at the recently opened dimensional rift through which CF fell. With his special senses, The Real Me can watch reality re-knit itself. That’s odd. Why did that dimensional portal open? Does CosmicFugitive ALSO have super-powers involving dimensional travel? Or did CF fall through the wobbling permanent portal in the boiler room to end up here and now? Or has space-time been stretched too much by The Real Me’s recent activities and by the recent attack of Inola Teg, Eldritch Horror from the Purple Dimension? Are these portals opening spontaneously because space-time is frayed in this location? Concerned, The Real Me quickly goes over the math in his head. No, according to his calculations, The Real Me believes that everything should be fine. He should be able to fold space-time over on itself several more times before such activity produces perceptible strain. Oh, well, better safe than sorry. *

Hey, everybody! I’m going to unfold space-time around the Sereni-TREE. Anybody in the North or South Wings should move their possessions to rooms in the East or West Wings. I think that we’ll still have plenty of room, even with the extra seven brides.

* The Real Me personally checks each and every room in the North and South Wings. Then he closes the doors where those wings connect to the common room. The Real Me takes a deep breath and concentrates. Nobody notices anything strange. Then The Real Me goes to open the door to the North Wing. He steps into the hallway beyond and closes the door behind him. Immediately, the door to the East Wing opens, and The Real Me walks out into the common room. *

Okay, that’s done now. The door to the North Wing will now lead to the East Wing, along with the East Wing door, of course. There is a similar relationship between the West and South Wings. All the wings are really occupying the same space, anyway. Okay, now. What next?

* With CosmicFugitive still in a state of shock and SimonWho nowhere to be seen, The Real Me asks Bride3 and Bride6 to watch after him. Bride6 REALLY seems to like CF's dress!*

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 3:59 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by montanagirl:
Thanks for the help TRM! I love my headband/armband/whatever-you-want-to-call-it-band (I'm really going to have to come up with a better name for it), but everything was starting to get fuzzy there for a while. Now he's happily sitting in his glass drinking some Pepsi I gave him. Who knew that he'd like Pepsi too?

Unfortunately, my boots don't actually match my dress. I don't have any grey boots, only black ones. But my black boots are so comfy that I didn't want to take a chance with a new, possibly uncomfortable, pair.

Hey, I haven't seen Mai in a while. Do we need to organize a search party?

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

You are very welcome. I'm glad you like it. Pepsi? Yes, of course.

* The Real Me makes a note to himself that the black ribbon-things like Pepsi. *

As to the boots, I am clearly not one to offer fashion tips.

As to Mai? Well, I am begining to become concerned, yes. Perhaps we will need to do something soon.

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 4:07 PM

* The Real Me rounds a corner and runs into Mal-licious. He bows deeply. *

Quote:
Originally posted by Malicious:
Does this mean I'M Ebo now? Or what? I'm confused. This is like the time Maryanne thought she was Ginger.

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

Yes! Exactly like when Maryanne thought she was Ginger. And no, you are not Ebo, you are Mal-licious. But you might want to PRETEND to be Ebo so that Ebo-Mal-licious isn't too terribly shocked.

* The Real Me continues on his way, and runs into someone else. Mal-licious, this time. He bows deeply. Hmmm... The Real Me notices that THIS Mal-licious is holding a red BALL. This must be the Ebo-Mal-licious. The Real Me sighs, and thinks that maybe he shouldn't have fooled poor Ebo. Perhaps PsychicRiver can restore Ebo's memories if he dug down deep enough into her mind. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 4:24 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
Yes! Exactly like when Maryanne thought she was Ginger. And no, you are not Ebo, you are Mal-licious. But you might want to PRETEND to be Ebo so that Ebo-Mal-licious isn't too terribly shocked.

I hate to have to tell you this, but just BEING me is shock enough.

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 4:34 PM

* The Real Me continues on his way. He passes SimonWho, who is apparently attempting to resuscitate the Ebo Golem. How odd. It was never alive in the FIRST place! Hmmm… No WONDER our good doctor wasn’t around earlier to help CosmicFugitive. The Real Me moves on. *

* The Real Me pauses while Cozen says some kind words to him. While The Real Me considers what Cozen has said, Cozen speaks briefly to MontanaGirl. By this time, The Real Me has composed his response: *

Actually, Cozen, I have to say that… Cozen?

* But, after making a quick call on his cell phone, Cozen is off, muttering something about not understanding women and wanting to ruin someone’s bum! The Real Me follows. *

Cozen? Cozen, are you…

* But by this time, Cozen has hopped into a chair dangling under a helicopter and is off, singing a strange song about snakes. Hand shielding his eyes against the sun, The Real Me watches Cozen’s helicopter disappear into the distance. *

Huh! What an odd fellow!

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 6:20 PM

*Slamming her 42nd shot of PepsiMilk back, twg falls off the stool onto her bum. She quickly tugs her mini down to feign some kind of decency.*

Hrumph

*Trying to pull herself up, she falls down once more. She sniffs the shot glass. Not PepsiMilk, not PepsiMilk.*

wha? That’s...yes, yes, it is, that's vodka...

*Closing her eyes, she once again attempts to stand. She stands. Ignoring the looks from the other blurs in the room, she walks back to the changing screen to get out of this harlot outfit. She steps into her coveralls, laces up her combat boots, and secures her hair in a ponytail. Feeling much more comfortable, she returns to the common room with only a mild headache*

I think those copter guys spilled some mighty fine spirits in my pepsimilk. I can usually handle more than just 42 shots, it must be the combination of Pepsi, milk, and the good drink. Well, I learned my lesson: Never think about past pageants and the entire town laughing at your inability to walk in heels across the Main Street stage.

So, do need me to call up IT and look for Mai?

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 7:17 PM

* The Real Me claps at ThatWeirdGirl's amazing drinking binge. *

Wow! I haven't seen anybody consume that much booze since... uh... since...

I've NEVER seen anybody put it away like that!

Uh...

Say, is that your Kaylee-complete-with-hearts-and-teddy-bear-patches outfit, or your Ripley-about-to-kick-some-alien-butt outfit?

And I think that it might be a bit premature to call in Inola Teg to hunt for Mai. After all, we haven't failed on our own yet. Remember, the last time Inola Teg graced us with her presence, the entire common room was trashed and Sparky was destroyed. Moreover, several of our fellow Treehouse inhabitants haven't been seen here since that day. Now, I'm not saying she ATE them, mind you.

I'm just sayin'.

Besides, don't we still have the ladies' bizzare dress contest going on?

Okay, I can make a new list now:

Volunteers for the Mai Rescue Party:

Cozen
MontanaGirl
ThatWeirdGirl
TheRealMe

P.S. Say do you really prefer "Tippy"?

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 7:26 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
Wow! I haven't seen anybody consume that much booze since... uh... since...

Did I tell you about the time back in freshmen year, down in Louisiana, when I won a shot contest at the frat house? Pretty sad if you ask me, a 110lb girl beating all those guys. Shameful.

Quote:

Say, is that your Kaylee-complete-with-hearts-and-teddy-bear-patches outfit, or your Ripley-about-to-kick-some-alien-butt outfit?

Kaylee

Quote:

P.S. Say do you really prefer "Tippy"?

I'm not sure. Still rollin it around. I like the idea and the way it sounds. "TiPpY" See it's kinda fun. I just don't know. I've always been ThatWeirdGirl, Twig, twg. Let's see how it goes.

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 7:37 PM

*Ebo-Licious perks up.* Rescue party? I volunteer! This red ball thing should really help!

I'm a woman of action! A fearless leader!

hmmmm...fearless leader...that sounds familiar...Eh, whatever. Probably not important.

Let the searching begin!

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 8:27 PM

MAI

*A very bewildered and slightly rumpled girl stirs from a deep sleep on a rather large pile of leaves.* Now that is weird! I don't feel hung over. Where in the hell am I?

Ohhhh look at the pretty butterflies, so sparkly, and oh my they're making some sort of strange formation. Now that's a little scary. Don't like scary butterflies. Eww don't like bugs at all. Shoo! Go on, and get!

Much better. Maybe I will just curl up again and go back to sleep. I was having such a lovely dream about men in slinky dresses. *Yawn* Yes, definitely time to go back to dream land.

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 8:54 PM

* Meanwhile, on the Sereni-TREE, The Real Me stands very still, eyes closed and concentrating. He has a backpack strapped behind him and a high-tech squirt gun at his hip, the kind with an extra large reservoir. He is trying to imagine Mai, to get a good picture of her in his head. Unfortunately, this has him thinking a lot about falling leaves. He takes a deep breath, focuses his will, and reaches out with his hand. A spot of light appears, and widens into a dark dimensional portal. It floats in mid-air. The Real Me turns to the other volunteers. *

Okay, that’s about the best I can do. I THINK that this will lead us to Mai, but I can’t promise that. This is not an exact science, after all. It might only lead us to SOME Mai; a version of Mai that exists somewhere in the multi-verse that is not the Mai that we knew.

Anyway, if you are ready, then follow me. I’ll keep the portal open for you as long as I can.

* The Real Me steps into the hole in reality and disappears. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Sunday, January 30, 2005 9:05 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
* The Real Me turns to the other volunteers. *

Anyway, if you are ready, then follow me. I’ll keep the portal open for you as long as I can.

Oh, we're leaving now! Just a minute!

*montanagirl jumps down off her barstool (making sure to grab the glass with the headband) and runs to her room (formerly in the South, now in the West wing). She returns dressed more regularly in a t-shirt, jeans and boots, with her black ribbon tied securely around her head.*

Hold the door TRM!

*She steps through the portal and vanishes. Her voice comes floating back.*

I sure hope he knows what he's doing.

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 5:39 AM

*grabbing her trusty hula hoop, twg/tippy follows thru the portral*

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Monday, January 31, 2005 2:09 PM

* One of the brides is the next to approach the dimensional portal. Before she goes, she turns and says: *

To follow the adventures of the Treehouse crew on Mai-Quest, see the thread, “The Treehouse Crew On Mai-Quest”.

* The bride dives into the portal. *

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Monday, January 31, 2005 2:12 PM

duplicate.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 2:32 PM

Wow, you're going off on a huge adventure to track down the one Mai in the multiverse that is ours. To join up, all we have to do is throw ourselves into that multi-dimensional portal, right?

*peers inside*

Hmm. If anyone wants me, I'll be in my bunk.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 2:50 PM

*twg's voice floats thru the portal*

Simon? If you stay behind, can you catch me if I have to jump thru in haste? You could join us, we'll likely need a doctor. The Sleestaks are creepy and violent.

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Monday, January 31, 2005 4:06 PM

*Ebo jumps through the swirly-mai-finding-porthole thing.*

Geronamo!

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 4:37 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by ebonezer:
*Ebo jumps through the swirly-mai-finding-porthole thing.

Ebo, are you you again?

Also, were we done with this thread?

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 5:41 PM

as me as i can be anyway

and yes, i think we are done.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 5:58 PM

Hmm. Well, where am I going to stand to catch those running from the scary monsters if not this thread?

I am following the activities in the other dimension thanks to my time/space visualiser but I think it might be a good idea if someone remained in the right reality so you know which one to come back to.

*settles down to watch Miss Congeniality again*

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 7:17 PM

Quote:
Stand back, I have a young doctor stadning by to catch me. I'd like him to not drop me, so clear off.

Hey, Simon! Here I come!

*twg begins running. she jumps thru the hole...*

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 2:22 AM

Okay, this is going to be a hand/eye coordination thing isn't it? Right, I'm a doctor, I can handle this.

*sidles up to glowing portal*

Just like catching a newborn baby. If that baby weighed 9 stone and was leaving the womb with the help of a jetpack...

*portal glows brighter*

Girl, you are coming head first, right?

*TWG's feet emerge from the portal at high speed*

Uh oh.

*THUMP*

Ow. Well, I caught you. And also, ow. I think for the other returnees, we'll just set up some crash mats, I don't think it's a good idea for us all to end up tangled up on the floor.

*notices he and TWG are still intertwined on the ground*

Um. I suppose one of us has to get up sometime.

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 5:25 AM

nah, we can just lie here for a bit and rest. unless you're uncomfortable. my elbow or knee pokin you?

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 10:14 AM

No, no, this is surprisingly comfortable.

*comfortable silence*

So..... what sort of present did you bring me from another dimension?

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 10:30 AM

Oh, I almost forgot...*twg opens her hand to reveal a plum sized crystal. The light hits the edge and a soft green glow can be seen inside.*

Chaka let me have this from the matrix table. He says it's a visual recorder, like a holorecorder. It can play back images. I thought maybe you could keep this near you at the sneak peek.

*timidly looks up at Simon's eyes*

You don't have to, being illegal and all. A short little projection with you waving at us in front of the con would be enough. Think of all the cool things you can do with this.

*twg encloses his hand around the crystal and smiles*

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 10:56 AM

This isn't fair, she's doing the timid eye thing. How am I supposed to resist?

Come on man, pull yourself together, you've braved worse things than this.

Argh! She's wrapped her fingers around mine. Now practically every wrappable thing of hers is wrapped around me.

Okay, dull thoughts, dull thoughts. John Major. The events section of the Essex Chronicle. Learning to fly in GTA: San Andreas. Cricket. Latin. TWG smearing oil across.... no, bad, bad, back to dull thoughts.

Must not risk getting thrown out of cinema. Must not be stopped from seeing the big screen debut of our heroes for 9 whole months. Concentrate. Fight it, my boy, fight it.

Hang on, it's been five minutes, this interior monologue has gone on way too long already. Be a man. Say no. Just say no. No, sorry, can't do it.

Well...

*TWG squeezes slightly*

Sure, anything you want.

Bugger

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 11:09 AM