The Treehouse Crew On Mai-Quest by TheRealMe

*grinning madly and uncontrollably bouncing*

This is so cool! can I ride the brontosaurus? Huh, huh? I'm a good climber, can I?

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Monday, January 31, 2005 2:30 PM

MONTANAGIRL

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
Now, who here has NOT seen Jurassic Park?

Quick, we need a glass with some water in it! That way we'll know when the T. Rex is coming. That's how it worked in the movie, right?

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 2:34 PM

* Glancing left and right for danger, The Real Me digs around in his backpack and produces a glass. Then he pulls out a canteen and pours a little water into the glass. He hands this to MontanaGirl. *

Would you keep our Tyrannosaurus Rex Detector?

Hopefully, we will be joined soon by the other volunteers.

ThatWeirdGirl, if you aren't careful, it could step on you or roll over on you!

* The Real Me seems to think. *

Then again, you would get one hell of a view from up there. You might be able to spot Mai.

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, January 31, 2005 2:45 PM

*pokes TRM in the ribs and points to the foliage to their left*

Is that Chaka?

Um, if the Sleestak are here, I'm jumping back thru the portal into the waiting arms of SimonWho.

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Monday, January 31, 2005 2:48 PM

* The Real Me rubs his ribs and stares back blankly, realizing that he has missed some very important song, movie, or television program. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, January 31, 2005 3:00 PM

MONTANAGIRL

Quote:
Originally posted by thatweirdgirl:
Um, if the Sleestak are here, I'm jumping back thru the portal into the waiting arms of SimonWho.

If the Sleestak are here, I'll be right there with you. Think SimonWho could catch both of us at once?

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 3:07 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by montanagirl:
If the Sleestak are here, I'll be right there with you. Think SimonWho could catch both of us at once?

Yes. Strong arms.

TRM, surely you've relaized were we are?
Now I need to find my way
I'm lost I'm lost find me
Living in the Land of the Lost

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Monday, January 31, 2005 3:31 PM

MALICIOUS

(Mal-licious peers out the window of the Jurrasic Beauty Barn and thinks to herself:)

"Darn! How the heck did they find me?"

(Mal-licious advises the Sleestaks doing her mani and pedi to hurry and then puts her head back under the dryer.)

"Maybe they won't see me. Mai didn't when she went by..."

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Monday, January 31, 2005 3:35 PM

*twhopwhwopthowp(yadda yadda...)*

Sure hope the parachute opens in time....

*it does*

*cozen floats gently onto jungletop, is snagged in vines and friendly fronds. Spies convenient brontosauras head. Loses 'chute, nimbly leaps onto big aminal, knowing that brontos are kind critters, if somewhat airheadish in that Blondes-R-Us sorta fashion*

Hmmmm. Jay Park, gotta be some awesome snakes about.

Wait a sec! I think I recognize those tiny figures down there. Gorram it, MG, I TOLD ya I was attending to the boots request! None of you have any faith?

The. Glad to see ya. Think after we're done here maybe I could snag a ride thru one of them portals back to the Treehouse?

*Shyly shuns twg, hoping she doesn't remember promise of servitude.*

Guessing it's a female, I'm gonna name my ride EmilyBronte. Hey! And she seems to have, quite naturally and accidentally, stepped on a spiffin' snake. Whoohoo!

Come again? Lookin' for My? My what?!

***
cozen n., Tarzan in a gold lame dress.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 4:09 PM

From several miles away a strange spectacle appears in the sky.

*Mai stretches and startles awake to a very loud whooshing sound thats just up the hill from her cozy little nest.*

Guess it's about time I start searching my surroundings. I am getting very hungry. What I wouldn't do for a nice bowl of ice cream.

Hmmm, maybe I have always lived in the forest as she is dressed completely in some strange concoction of twisted vines and foliage. It's awfully pretty too bad its so darn itchy.
I really wish I had something else to wear about now... something comfy and warm...

*POOF!* Out of nowwhere a nice set of sweatpants and t-shirt fall from above. Walks around large boulder to change, ah so much better.

Ok, now back to the problem at hand. Where the hell am I? Guess there is only one way to figure it out. *Ponders investigating the sound and begins trudging up through the trees* Wow. What a lovely view. Hey what is that movement oh no, no, no, what if it's those darn attack butterflies.

*Runs quickly back down to the bottom of the hill and dives behind the enormous boulder to take cover. The boulder begins to shake slightly and then moves in a complete circle. Large eyes peer out from the not-a-boulder thing. One last thought echoes through Mai's head right before she faints from fright. "Your lost in the woods. We all are."

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Monday, January 31, 2005 4:14 PM

*Ebo tumbles out of the swirly vortex thing.*

Woah. That was fun! Lets do it again!

*Ebo looks around and finds that she is, once again, talking to herself.*

Well humph.

*Looking down at herself Ebo see's that the porthole has robbed her of her slinky dress. In its place, she is wearing jeans, heavy duty boots, and a tank top. A machete is hanging off of her waist.*

Ohh. Spiffy.

*Ebo looks up to see a parachute sinking down into the trees. She figures that would be a good place to start. She begens trashing thru the forrest, swinging the machete about and singing a little song of her own design.*

A trashing we will go
A thrashing we will go
Hi-ho the merry-o
A thrashing we will go

I really like this machete
Is is really cool
hi-ho the merry-o
this machete is really cool.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 4:24 PM

Hey, what's that thrashing sound? I don't like the sound of it.

Quote:

I really like this machete
Is is really cool
hi-ho the merry-o
this machete is really cool.

what's that singing? Is it Holly? No, no, it can't be, Holly got out of here, didn't she? Oh golly. Maybe it's one of the brides.

*the singing gets louder*

I know that typed voice...it's Ebo!!

Over here! We're over...*TRM zips twg's mouth shut, Shhh*

pay, hmp boo moo dhab?

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Monday, January 31, 2005 4:33 PM

Quote:
Over here! We're over-

*Ebo stops her singing and trashing and holds very still, trying to be quiet.*

What the...that sounded like the sporadic trying of TWG!

*Ebo resumes trashing towards the voice. She jumps through the tree's into a clearing.*

Hi guys! I'm back, and look at this spiffy machete!

*TRM tackles Ebo and clamps his hand over her mouth. "Shhhhhh!"*

wiii? Wmmmph da magggmmer?

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 5:44 PM

Hey Ebo! Yo, Awesomest Judgestress! Spiffin' machete, could use such an implement for snake skinnin'!

*Sees twg tackling Ebo, clamping hand over Ebomouth.*

Uh, whatsa matter?

*EmilyBronte thrashes about, making REALLY LOUD STOMPING NOISES AND BELLOWING AS ONLY A HUGE DINOSAUR CAN BELLOW!*

*cozen is shaken loose from EmilyBronte. Lands beside big snake, grabs it and hauls butt toward cover. EB whacks a big rock while lumbering away to safer environs. cozen hides behind vibrating rock. Fearfully peers out. Makes really big eyes when he spies Mai!*

"Eeek!"

"Ack!"

Found you!

Mai, miss the dream inducing composting leafy dress.... Pleased to meet ya. Um, don't worry, this here snake has done gone shuffled off the mortal coil. Long story. Listen, was I halucinating, or did I think I saw a sign, sez "Jurassic Beauty Barn, 10 yards this way"?

Maybe they sell icecreams and margaritas. Beauty essentials, are they not? Gotta say, though, my credit's a bit, um, on the thin side....

***
Mai goodness!

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Monday, January 31, 2005 5:48 PM

awww, cozen, you named your dinosaur after me. I feel so very honored.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 6:01 PM

Awesomest Judgestress sez,

Quote:

awww, cozen, you named your dinosaur after me. I feel so very honored.

Um, yeah! That's right. Ah, y'know, truly inspirational. Big huge 5 story high scaly green-gray prehistoric monster ambles into the scene, I immediately think of Ebonezer.

***
Like, duh.

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Monday, January 31, 2005 7:14 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by thatweirdgirl:
TRM, surely you've relaized were we are?
Now I need to find my way
I'm lost I'm lost find me
Living in the Land of the Lost

www.thatweirdgirl.com

Uh… Actually…

* The Real Me seems a little embarrassed. *

Actually, I didn’t WATCH Land of the Lost. But I knew who Patty Duke was, remember?

But… Hey, butterflies!

* The Real Me pulls a huge butterfly net out of his backpack and captures numerous of the tiny creatures. He examines them. *

Huh! These seem to be exactly the same type of butterflies that ManiacNumberOne used back at the Treehouse to make the solar collectors that I later turned into thrusters! This must be their place of origin!

* The Real Me spots a familiar form nearby on the ground not far from Cozen. *

LOOK! There is Mai! Excellent! We have MontanaGirl, ThatWeirdgirl, Ebonezer, Cozen (Hi, Cozen!), and myself looking for Mai, and HERE SHE IS! (Huh, I thought that Mal-licious might be with us, too, but I probably mistook Ebo-licious for her.)

* The Real Me pauses. *

Excuse me, Mai? Are you OUR Mai? Do you know us? Did you come from the Sereni-TREE?

Ah, good! Well, mission accomplished, then. All that we need to do now is hike back to the dimensional portal that I created, and we can all return safe and sound to the Sereni-TREE. We’re home free!

In fact, at this point, only a crude plot device can stop us!

* The Real Me glances left, then glances right. *

Hopefully, we weren’t so noisy that we attracted one!

P.S. So, Ebo, your true name is Emily Bronte??

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, January 31, 2005 7:31 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
In fact, at this point, only a crude plot device can stop us!

* The Real Me glances left, then glances right. *

Hopefully, we weren’t so noisy that we attracted one!

*twg sees MG's glass begin to shutter. She tugs at TRM's sleeve.*

Um, I think there's a plot device over there.

*a loud rumbling accompanies the rippling water*

Which way to the portal! Who remembers the way to the portal?!!? We have to get to the portal.

*twg lashes four vines together, then loops them thru her hula hoop. She fastens the vines to MG, Ebo, Mai, and TRM. She clips cozen's harness to the hoop.*

go! I'll follow in a second. I want to make sure Chaka is safe.

*twg runs towards the shaking bush on the other side of the rock*

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Monday, January 31, 2005 8:37 PM

HA! I’m prepared for this!

* With an evil grin, The Real Me levels his high-tech squirt gun at the approaching plot device, uh, Tyrannosaurus Rex, which is roaring in anger and about to charge ThatWeirdGirl. He aims high so as to not hit ThatWeirdGirl or her friend. The Real Me braces himself, and leans forward as he pulls the trigger. There is a powerful deep hum from the device, which climbs in frequency to become a high-pitched whine. Suddenly, there is a loud crack as water is forced out of the nozzle at hypersonic velocity. Friction with the air converts this stream of water into a high-energy plasma, which engulfs the T Rex and kills it instantly. The Real Me finds that he has been pushed back a few feet from the force of his weapon. He seems surprised. *

Hey, it worked!

* The Real Me drops the half-melted squirt gun. *

Huh. Guess I still need to work out a few bugs.

* Then a SECOND Tyrannosaurus Rex roars, upset at losing its mate. *

* The Real ME points. *

The portal is THAT way.

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, January 31, 2005 8:43 PM

"Excuse me, Mai? Are you OUR Mai? Do you know us? Did you come from the Sereni-TREE? "

Yes, yes it's me! Of course, its me. Course there's really only way I can prove that I am indeed a member of the Serin-Tree crew. Quiz time! Ask me all about the FLT, FFLT, and whatever other abbreviations I've left out.

TRM, Ebo, TWG, Montana, Cozen! Oh my gosh! It's so great to see everyone again! I thought I was out here all alone! Looky... I made a new friend. Turns out the not-a-boulder I was hiding behind is a dinosaur! A really cute, really loveable, his name is Frederick, kind a dino! Can I keep him? Pleeeaaaseeee? I promise I'll take care of him.

Meanwhile back at the entrance portal a fancily dressed bride number 1 awaits the return of her fellow adventurers. *Sticks crunch behind the fair maiden and she turns expecting to greet her new friends. Instead she is met with a large heavy stick to the head and she falls, not so gracefully to the forest floor. The portal door is now left completely unguarded. A large shadow looms and steps into the door. The weapon of attack is thrown to the ground as the door begins to rapidly close behind the mysterious person and or scary thing...

(Now how's that for a nice little plot twist?)

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Monday, January 31, 2005 8:59 PM

"Mai, miss the dream inducing composting leafy dress.... Pleased to meet ya. Um, don't worry, this here snake has done gone shuffled off the mortal coil.

Hey Cozen, nice to meet ya too. Um lovely snake remnants you got there. Yea, so anyway, Let's get everyone all gathered up and get out of this creepy place... Hey have you met Frederick? He's my new pet. Although, now that you mention I suppose it couldn't hurt to stop of at the barn... I am starving after all. I mean it's not like the portals going anywhere, right?

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Monday, January 31, 2005 9:11 PM

Why, of COURSE you can keep your dinosaur, Mai.

And I am MOST impressed by your plot twist. Actually, the only thing that can short-circuit your plot idea is that I can create new dimensional portals at will. In fact, I can open one now, to…

* At that moment, the vine tied around The Real Me jerks him off balance. He falls, hits his head on a rock, and goes unconscious. The second Tyrannosaurus Rex prepares to charge. *

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 10:13 AM

MALICIOUS

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
The second Tyrannosaurus Rex prepares to charge.

(Mal-Licious grabs the credit card from the second T-Rex so she can pay for her day of beauty. Adds large tip.)

Mal-licious

Co-Holder of the Red Bell from Hell

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 3:24 PM

*Seeing Mai occupied with new pet dinosaur, cozen sidles up to disconsolate T-Rex*

Yeah, Mal-L just does that to people. Seems she gets her way with extinct large ferocious creatures, too. I'm with ya on the lack of credit routine. Me, I'm maxed out for years.

*receives grunting response*

Hmmm, eat the bill collectors. Fine tactic! Still, doesn't quite solve the larger problem of sending flowers to yer mum who lives in a city far away. Say, what shiny claws you have. I'm wonderin', skin this here snake for me? You can have the rest, consider it an hors d'oeuvre. For dinner, you might consider the annoying hissy critters over thataway. For dessert, might I recommend the creature by that portal?

*Receives non-commital grunt from T-R, who casually skins snake prior to slurping remnants. Rexy saunters off, looking for fatter things to kill and eat*

Say, Mai, when you're done with scratching Freddy...er, um, Frederick, behind his ears 'n all, think we could get him to lug this 52 lbs. of grade-A snakeskin through the portal? After icecreams, of course.

*Is suddenly dragged away from scene by 'chute harness freshly attatched to distant hula-hoop.*

My dress! It's being ripped to shreds! (ack?)

***
How large a "sandbox" does a small dino-pet need anyway?

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 6:03 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:

P.S. So, Ebo, your true name is Emily Bronte??

Well, Emily. But for the love of god don't call me that. HEY!! DUDE! That name! Emily Bronte! It's SOOOO from the play SCAPINO!!! Do i get a shiny penny? Do I? Do I?

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 7:14 PM

*Chaka shows twg the nearest Pylon. Once inside the duo adjusts the Matix table crystals to start a thunderstorm. The wind begins to howl and the creatures take cover, leaving the rescue party free to safely leave this plane*

I'm coming!

*twg sees her bubblegum pink hula hoop bouncing towards the portal and hears Cozen's ramblings. Mal seems to have already returned to her thread, so no need to look for her*

I'm right behind you. Way to go on the second portal TRM. Chaka is staying behind, it's his home and he holds out hope that one day the Marshalls will return to their home with him.

*twg steps back and preps for a run to jump thru the hole*

Stand back, I have a young doctor stadning by to catch me. I'd like him to not drop me, so clear off.

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 7:24 PM

* The Real Me wakes up. *

Huh. I guess I created a portal to the Sereni-TREE as I was falling unconscious. I'm getting better at this. You all go ahead. I'll have to go fetch Bride1. We don't want to leave anyone behind.

* The Real Me looks around. *

Is everyone accounted for, then?

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 7:38 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by ebonezer:
Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:

P.S. So, Ebo, your true name is Emily Bronte??

Well, Emily. But for the love of god don't call me that.

Your secret is safe with me, Em.. uh Ebo.

The Real Me

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005 8:54 PM

Say, Mai, when you're done with scratching Freddy...er, um, Frederick, behind his ears 'n all, think we could get him to lug this 52 lbs. of grade-A snakeskin through the portal?

Frederick says he would be more than happy to oblige. For a price of course... You got any skittles? Frederick loves skittles!

Guess we'll see everyone back on SereniTREE! How am I ever gonna repay you all for your heroic rescue?

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 4:18 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:

* The Real Me looks around. *

Is everyone accounted for, then?

Me! I'm not accounded for as of yet. But I'm having fun, what with the running around in the jungle and all. What if i lose my machete going back through the porthole? I love my machete.

*TRM grabs Ebo and tosses her through the porthole.*

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 2:20 PM

*cozen hurtles thru portal, lands on thoughtfully provided comfy mat. Sets to dodging people, beauty products, a pet dinosaur. Feints left, jumps right into path of plummeting Ebo.*

*Thunk*

Glad I caught ya. Say, is that a machete in my pocket or am I just happy....

*Realizes that, clad only in Vic Secret underthing, that he ain't got no pockets.*

'Scuse me, sorry! Gotta go measure everyone's feet. (Uh, as for SCAPINO, musta missed that one. Will this hypnotisin' Kennedy half-dollar do in lieu of a shiny penny?)

*evening comes*

*evening goes*

*wee small early morning hour arrives*

Just four feet left to measure. But they're... well, they're all entwined with each other. Sigh. Nuthin' for it....

*Carefully untangles tangled toes. Takes measurements. Gets idea....*

* Very c.a.r.e.f.u.l.l.y sets to unzipping zippers, unbuttoning buttons.*

*Scampers off to laundry. Emerges some time later dressed in SimonWho's clothes.*

***
Don't discount the breathability of dresses.

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 2:33 PM

Cozen, are you pondering what I'm pondering?

Because I'm pondering waffles. I could really use a waffle right about now.

I hope whatever your plans are, they are waffle-shaped.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 2:50 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by ebonezer:

I hope whatever your plans are, they are waffle-shaped.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

*thwopthwop (...and so on)*

*Gallon jug of authentic Quebec maple syrup lands in jacuzzi*

Coincidentally, it appears that Frederick is laying eggs.

This is doable. Dinowaffles comin' up. Get 'em while they're hot!

***
It's hard to tell, with dinosaurs.

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 2:53 PM

*Ebo fetches herself a waffle, and uses her machete to cut it into bit sized chuncks.*

Omg, this is fantastic! But won't Frederick be angry that we're eating her un-born children?

Eh, I'll worry about that after i finish eating.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 5:23 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by cozen:
Emerges some time later dressed in SimonWho's clothes.*

Hmm. If I were still on Mai Quest and not securely places in the treehouse thread, I would think you were up to something.

*looks around, pokes SimonWho in the chest*

I think I'm still tangled up in SimonWho, am I?

www.thatweirdgirl.com

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 6:07 PM

MONTANAGIRL

I'm confused. Which thread am I supposed to be in? Fearless leader! Ebo? TRM? Anyone?

Ooh, waffles!

Packer fans welcome.
All others tolerated.

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 7:32 PM

uummmmm....this one. This is the tread to be in.

I'll alert the troops.

-----------------------------------

Four out of five gynecologists recommend calling Ebo a girl.

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Wednesday, February 2, 2005 7:33 PM