Black Diamond Ski Resort by TheGreyJedi

Quote:
Originally posted by montanagirl:
Quote:
Originally posted by CALLMEATH:
Hi everybody! Mind if I join in? Don't mind the guinea pig statue, it's just a figment of my imagination. How's the water?

Umm, I'm allergic to guinea pigs. Could you maybe move your statue a bit?

If you can be an idiot, I can be an idiot. - D'Argo

Not to fear MG, (do you mind if I call you that?) as previously stated, its just a figment.

And made of marble.

Static, you have nothing to worry about. I'm rather fond of my non-pulpy state.

Escaped reaver,huh? Sounds like a job for someone else.

*Puts on snorkle and jumps in, keeping under the water.*

Glug, gurgle, blurb. -Translation: This water's divine. Anyone got any Mango Lassi?

Quote:
Just smack me with a cricket bat if I did. Wait a minute, that would make me a zombie.

Almost didn't catch that.

<- Shaun

"Invader's blood marches through my veins like giant radioactive rubber pants. The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!"

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Monday, April 11, 2005 8:35 AM

Hey Ath, were you the one that pointed out on another thread how

looks just like Shaun?

*Gets out trusty rusty telescope to check on the Reaver hunters.*

Hmm, the General is down. I hope those guys are okay. But not enough to, you know, actually get out of the jacuzzi and go help.

*Leans back and takes a sip of Pepsi.*

Ahh, this is the life!

*Half-hearted splash in Simon's direction.*

If you can be an idiot, I can be an idiot. - D'Argo

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Monday, April 11, 2005 12:41 PM

*Rat see's everyone follow RealMe into the portal.*

Fools!!!

I better go save them, but first...

*Rat takes out a remote and pushes a button. Immediately the General grows to two hundred feet tall.*

Shiny!!... Windmills, get to work on the repairs, me and Windell(That's my giant.) are going to save the rest!

Rat thinking to himself: My own superpower was weather prediction, I predict that it's cold, but maybe if I focus a little.....

*The clouds part, and there's a beautiful rainbow.*

Huh? If that's caused by water in the atmosphere, then maybe if I focus just a little more.....

*A beam of light comes down from the sky, and burns a nine foot ant that was just about to attack Rat.*

I didn't even see that standing there! Oh well, off to save the others.

*Rat and windell set off across a field. Awhile later, they come to a cave.*

This must be it, Windell, why don't you reach in and see if you can find them?

-Ratboy

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Monday, April 11, 2005 12:57 PM

ImEarly rushs through the portal and sees that The Real Me is surrounded by a Fur of Yeti in a strange cave. (ImEarly does not see a stream and is relieved.) Moments later Needleseye, and Jake7 enter the cave, they pass by him without a word.

Quote:
Well, as it's just you and me so far, we'd better come up with something

Jake7 says.

Somehow Needleseye and Jake7 can not see him. Had something gone wrong? Was he invisible?

ImEarly pokes Needleseye in the back gently with the hilt of the Katana he held.

Suddenly a Giant hand probes the cave, one of the fingers slaps ImEarly upside the head. Ouch!!! He says.

Go sign my Guest Book,
http://www.geocities.com/thisbrownhouse
Then download Serenity,
http://homepage.mac.com/rocketplane/FileSharing8.html

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Monday, April 11, 2005 1:10 PM

* Back when The Real Me pokes his head through his dimensional portal from the General Lee to the top of the ridge, he is surprised by a Yeti. It’s simply amazing how impossible it is to notice their white fur against the snowy background if they don’t move. The Yeti grabs The Real Me and pulls him through to the ridge side of the portal, then it roughly stuffs him into a leather sack which it slings over one shoulder. As the Yeti jogs off, The Real Me is bashed nearly senseless as the sack keeps slapping into the Yeti’s back. The Real Me is somewhat alarmed that he shares the sack with something large, furry, and slimy. Ouch! And with some kind of horns! The Real Me manages to keep just enough concentration to draw the near opening of the dimensional portal after him. *

* A short time later, the sack is upended and The Real Me is dumped, along with a thoroughly pulverized elk, onto the hard stone floor of a cave. He is still somewhat dazed as he scrambles to his feet. He gulps as he finds that he is surrounded by ten huge Yeti, all baring their sharp teeth and reaching for him. A few block the only visible mundane exit of the cave. The Real Me glances toward where the opening of his dimensional portal must be. There it is! If he can only make a break for it, and…*

* One of the Yeti grabs The Real Me and ties him to a spit. They clearly mean to roast him over a fire! *

Oh, well. I’ve been in worse situations, after all.

* The Real Me thinks. *

Okay, maybe not.

* Just then, ImEarly jumps out of the hole in reality, gripping the katana of Bride1 as if he knows how to use it. He is followed by Jake7, who is encased in a shimmering force field. Then comes Needleseye, who apparently needed a moment to get dressed. Good, Needleseye is here! The Real Me relaxes, remembering the formidable powers that Needleseye demonstrated back… *

Quote:
Jake7 asks anxiously:

TRM, you OK?

Quote:
Needleseye says:

Sorry Jake7 I'm not terribly hungry, but it looks possible that the Yeti are.
Ten Yeti... I don't think I can sing their heads off without taking everyone else’s too.
Anyone have a plan?

*Hums nervously, then the flowers start sprouting*

not the flowers

* The Real Me decides that NOW would be a good time to formulate a plan. He looks up at the circle around him of monstrously tall… uh, monsters. All are reaching forward, baring their teeth, and putting forth a low, rumbling growl, rich in sub-sonics. *

Oh, I’m fine, Jake7. Thanks for asking.

* The Real Me hears Jake7 come up with some kind of plan that involves freeing him from the spit and retreating back though the portal. The Real Me considers this. Hmmmm, seems dubious. Too many over-sized opponents for them to fight through to get to me. A plan! A plan! There must be some way that the four of us could leave this cave alive, if only…*

* The Real Me is startled as the Yeti stop growling, get to their knees, and start bowing. They are all oriented toward… Still tied on the spit, The Real Me must crane his head around to look. Toward Needleseye! *

* Excellent! As plans go, “getting worshiped” works! *

Uh, Needleseye, I suspect that your ability to spontaneously generate flowers around you has attracted the attention of the Yeti. I’m guessing that they don’t get much in the way of flowers, here, or much of anything that grows. It is possible that the Yeti have taken you for some kind of fertility goddess.

* Uneasily, The Real Me realizes that Needleseye may BE some kind of fertility goddess. *

* A nearby Yeti frees The Real Me from his bonds and casually tosses him aside. Then the Yeti all stand. The largest of their number slowly approaches Needleseye. *

Needleseye! If you can communicate with them, we may be able to acquire important allies who…

* The largest Yeti grabs Needleseye and attempts to tie HER to a spit. *

Dammit! Jake7! What was your plan again?

* The Real Me tries to concentrate, with some difficulty. Rat has played “They Might Be Giants” music around him so much that he is starting to hear it in waking dreams. *

* Wait! The Real Me realizes with a start that he’s not imagining that music! A giant hand reaches into the cave. *

The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, April 11, 2005 1:22 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by ImEarly:

Somehow Needleseye and Jake7 can not see him. Had something gone wrong? Was he invisible?

Actually, ImEarly, a number of us have developed superpowers simply by being in the Clubhouse threads, of which this is the 19th. It is possible that your newly acquired superpower is invisibility. That would certainly go hand-in-hand with your new razor-sharp katana.

The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, April 11, 2005 1:33 PM

*twg picks up the radio comm thingy.*

Hey, TRM! You need my powers of friendly confusion? It worked on IT...it could work on these Yeti too. If you need me, just portal me through. over *giggle*

*twg kisses Static's hands and exits the jacuzzi. She pulls on her coveralls and laces up her boots*

You guys stay here...they need a crazy person and that person is me. Actually, PR would be better in this situation, but he's somewhere else at the moment.

TRM? I'm ready when you are.

www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
Can we not revel in our cyber-love?

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Monday, April 11, 2005 1:41 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by montanagirl:
Hey Ath, were you the one that pointed out on another thread how looks just like Shaun?

If you can be an idiot, I can be an idiot. - D'Argo

Yes, twas me. I love that little dude.

By the way, does all this crazy stuff with Reavers and shrinking cars and people turning into monsters happen often? 'Cause I'm more of a lazy around in the jacuuzi (with occasional breaks to make freakish snowmen, of course) kind of guy.

"Invader's blood marches through my veins like giant radioactive rubber pants. The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!"

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Monday, April 11, 2005 1:43 PM

* Prone on the cold, stone floor of the Yeti cave, The Real Me gets a beep on his com-link. *

Hello? This is Me.

Uh, okay, ThatWeirdGirl.

* The Real Me puts his com-link back in his pocket with one hand while he waves the other. A spot of light appears on the cave wall, which expands into a second dimensional portal. But the strain of opening two portals is too much, considering his recent ordeal, and The Real Me falls unconscious. Both portals shimmer, but remain. *

The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, April 11, 2005 1:49 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by CALLMEATH:
By the way, does all this crazy stuff with Reavers and shrinking cars and people turning into monsters happen often? 'Cause I'm more of a lazy around in the jacuuzi (with occasional breaks to make freakish snowmen, of course) kind of guy.

Well, it does tend to happen more often than not, but there always seem to be two groups of people: those who are off taking care of the problem, and those who are perfectly happy to let them go. I have been in both groups, depending on how the mood struck me. Right now I'm in the jacuzzi and bikini kind of mood.

But we definitely need to make some Calvin snowmen later.

If you can be an idiot, I can be an idiot. - D'Argo

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Monday, April 11, 2005 2:10 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
...The Real Me falls unconscious. Both portals shimmer, but remain. *

*twg sees the burning circle before her start to quake...quickly, she summersaults thru the portal. Once on the other side, the dire events immediately throw her into action*

TRM? You okay? No. All right. *twg drags the unconscious form of TRM to the portal and pushes him thru. She clicks on the comm*

Hey guys, I'm sending TRM back to you guys. He needs some kind of medical attention...I don't have time to treat him on this end. over.

*the portals slowly fade, stranding the intrepid travelers in the cave. twg takes note that only one Yeti is actually guarding the spit. Four Yetii have the cave entrance guarded. The other five Yetii are in a staring/growling match with the party.*

*she takes a deep breath, smiles, and begins the Peppermint Twist*

Hey everybody! How are you doing today? Awesome! Hey, let's change the tunes, man, these TMBG are really bringing us down, man. Fireballs? Rockin. *Sugar Shack begins to play in the background* There's a crazy little shack beyond the tracks...

*still dancing, twg twists her way to the five growling Yetii*

So, what’s' happening dudes? Want some gum? I have strawberry and root beer flavored.

*they eye her suspiciously, but cannot help tapping their feet. soon two of them have copied her moves and have joined her in the dance. One evens takes the proffered gum and pops it, repeatedly.*

Say...what's that? Is it a fire or something? Cause my mommy, you remember your mother, right? Well, my mommy always told me not to sacrifice or attempt to eat any mystical creatures. I don't know a lot about that womanly creature over there, but I know she's supernatural. Kinda like you. *twg smiles brightly and taps the nearest Yeti in the chest with her finger. He giggles.*

See? Why not let her go? We could have a party instead...I have more music...and lots of hula hoops!

www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
Can we not revel in our cyber-love?

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Monday, April 11, 2005 2:14 PM

ImEarly hears a distant voice, telling him that his invisibility may factually be some sort of new power, and as the others do not see the katana he holds. It would appear that anything he touches becomes invisible as well. What to do, what to do.

Another voice says, 'use the force ImEarly.'

This is getting weirder and weirder.

Go sign my Guest Book,
http://www.geocities.com/thisbrownhouse
Then download Serenity,
http://homepage.mac.com/rocketplane/FileSharing8.html

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Monday, April 11, 2005 2:29 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by montanagirl:
But we definitely need to make some Calvin snowmen later.

If you can be an idiot, I can be an idiot. - D'Argo

Funny you should mention that. Check the Blue Sun Room.

Wait. I can just paste the link here can't I? (Sorry, I've got a cold so thinking ain't my strong suit at the momonet.)

Here it is. http://www.fireflyfans.net/sunroomitem.asp?i=3459&nid=5133

"Invader's blood marches through my veins like giant radioactive rubber pants. The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!"

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Monday, April 11, 2005 3:08 PM

*Windell retracts it's hand, and shows Rat what it found.*

No Windell, those are Yeti, just throw them back.....or stomp them!

*Rat hears something in the cave.*

Quote:
...Hey everybody! How are you doing today? Awesome!...*Sugar Shack begins to play in the background* "There's a crazy little shack beyond the tracks..."...So, what’s' happening dudes? Want some gum? I have strawberry and RootBeer flavored....

Oh no, they,re torchering them! I'v got to get in there!!

*Rat focuses and a beam of light melts the top off the ice cave. Rat look's down from Windell's shoulder.*

As Dr.Nick: Hi everybody!!!

-Ratboy

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Monday, April 11, 2005 3:12 PM

*twg spies ImEarly inspecting his Katana. She winks in his direction and smiles at the invisible newcomer.*

Woohoo!

*she suddenly jumps on the back of one of the dancing Yetii*

Giddy-up! I bet we can take the others in a game of chicken...what say you? Oh, I'm ThatWeirdGirl or TipPy...what's your name?

*the Yeti growls and frantically reaches for twg, but stops when she kisses the crown of his head*

Ervin

Nice to meet ya, Ervin...so, shall we play?

*Ervin laughs good-naturedly at twg and grips her legs. He launches himself at the bubblegum Yeti*

Arghhhh! You’re goin down, Hewitt!

*Hewitt looks up, surprised but laughing. He grabs Jake7 and throws her on his back. He braces for the hit.*

This so rocks! Where's Ebo? She would love playful Yetii.

www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
Can we not revel in our cyber-love?

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Monday, April 11, 2005 4:26 PM

MALICIOUS

Some 6th or 8th sense tells me that Ervin and Hewitt are going to start posting now, just like Bride7 does. DESPITE being PURELY FICTIONAL. She was SUPPOSED to be a BRIBE, remember people???

TRM, how about that synopsis of all the threads you promised? Huh, huh, huh? How 'bout it, huh?

Mal-licious

I think I will add cursing and the hurling about of things to my repertoire.

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Monday, April 11, 2005 4:27 PM

ImEarly spies That Weird Girl just as she winks, and smiles. He found it interesting that she could see him. Just the same, it was pleasant to know. Especially someone so beautiful. It may prove advantageous to have someone around who can sense his presence.

ImEarly walks forward just as a beam of light evaporates the roof of the cave, and impacts the ground before him. A hole is blasted into the ground, narrowly missing his feet. Dr. Nick yells from above.

Malpractice!! ImEarly screams.

Go sign my Guest Book,
http://www.geocities.com/thisbrownhouse
Then download Serenity,
http://homepage.mac.com/rocketplane/FileSharing8.html

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Monday, April 11, 2005 5:56 PM

NEEDLESEYE

* The largest Yeti grabs Needleseye and attempts to tie HER to a spit. *

Let go of me, you big walking carpet!

*Thankfully the Yeti are suddenly too distracted by ThatWeirdGirl's friendly confusion and the ice cave opening from above.*

Damn TWG's good, I could use some pointers.

*Finally the last Yeti guarding the spit is busy doing the Hustle. Needleseye, grabs TheRealMe dragging him to the edge of the cave. Farthest away from the dancing and chicken fighting Yeti's.*

Fertility Goddess? RealMe. *shakes head*
I guessno one noticed that I lack "definition".
*smiles an almost loving smile at the unconcious RealMe. Placing TheRealMe's head on her lap as the floor of the icey cave is rather hard. She begins to sing .The cave begins to grow tiny flowers over it's entire surface, a typical flora tundra.*

Winged water
Feathered river
Dirty rich soil
Strong and fertile
The then shallow she
Earth as we know it
The then hallow she
A sky for the sacred
Stars in my eyes
Stars in my face
Womb in the belly
Capitol place
The then shallow she
Earth as we know it
The then hallow she
A sky for the sacred

-------
Cocteau Twins- Shallow then Hallow
-------

Keeper of Jayne's goggles. 8)
I caved.~ http://needleseyeland.blogspot.com/

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Monday, April 11, 2005 6:13 PM

* The Real Me opens his eyes. There are a bunch of people in a jacuzzi, some that he knows and others that he doesn’t. He sits up. What happened to the Yeti? Huh. ThatWeirdGirl must have shoved him back through the portal that he made for her. *

Hi, Static! Grey! Mai! MontanaGirl!

Quote:
Originally posted by Malicious:
Some 6th or 8th sense tells me that Ervin and Hewitt are going to start posting now, just like Bride7 does. DESPITE being PURELY FICTIONAL. She was SUPPOSED to be a BRIBE, remember people???

TRM, how about that synopsis of all the threads you promised? Huh, huh, huh? How 'bout it, huh?

Mal-licious

I think I will add cursing and the hurling about of things to my repertoire.

Huh? Oh, hi, Mal…

Bride7? But she's REAL, now!

Heh. Heh. No, I think that many of our folks are too new to remember the creation of the Brides. That was during the Gala Pageant of Cross-dressing Men. That was before Grey’s modifications to make the Sereni-Tree a starship.

Synopsis? What synopsis?

Oh, THAT synopsis. I have all the links, but things move too fast for me to get the actual details down. Also, sadly, I’ve gotten a little bit lazy.

So, Mal-licious, if I do produce such a synopsis, what’s in it for me? Are you attempting to offer me a “bride”?

Just kidding! Jake7 has asked about it as well,and I told her I'd try to get on it. However, since YOU requested it, I must obey.

But really, right now I have to get back to the mission.

* The Real Me reaches out and creates a dimensional portal. He walks through. *

The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, April 11, 2005 6:50 PM

* A spot of light appears in a non-obvious spot high along one wall in the Yeti cave. It expands to become a ring of fire surrounding a dark void. From this hole in reality steps The Real Me. *

Ah, good! Everybody’s still alive! I’m back in time to help my friends to… to…

* For the second time, The Real Me is exposed to the full force of the terrifying power that is ThatWeirdGirl’s Weirdness. *

The HUSTLE? I LOVE the HUSTLE!

* Caught under the spell, The Real Me starts dancing. He slips, falls down from his high spot, smacks his head a few times on the way down, and lies unconscious on the cold stone floor of the Yeti cave. *

Quote:
Needleseye wrote:
*Finally the last Yeti guarding the spit is busy doing the Hustle. Needleseye, grabs TheRealMe dragging him to the edge of the cave. Farthest away from the dancing and chicken fighting Yeti's.*

Fertility Goddess? RealMe. *shakes head*
I guess no one noticed that I lack "definition".
*smiles an almost loving smile at the unconcious RealMe. Placing TheRealMe's head on her lap as the floor of the icey cave is rather hard. She begins to sing .The cave begins to grow tiny flowers over it's entire surface, a typical flora tundra.*

* The Real Me sighs happily, and is still for a time, at peace. He likes pretty flowers. Oh, look, and there's Jake7, come to rescue him again. She's nice. But what happened to the first six Jakes? And is ImEarly really invisible, or is it that we just can't see him? *

* The Real Me takes a deep breath and opens one eye. *

Definition?

The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Monday, April 11, 2005 7:38 PM

(Pssst! ThatWeirdGirl! It's nice, very nice, to have you back with us!

)

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 2:27 AM

STATIC

**Static watches his beloved 'suit up' and disappear through the portal. Grey immediately turns to Static with an expectant expression on his face. Static just shrugs and orders another beer.**

She can handle herself. . .and I've no desire to see confused Yeti. It breaks your heart, it really does.

Besides. If things get dicey for her, we can go save the day. We are, after all, Big Damn Heroes.

==================================================
http://burstsofstatic.blogspot.com/

Evil, Lecherous Hump

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 2:58 AM

THEGREYJEDI

We? Whassis we stuff?

*is drunk, having finished another bottle*

--------------------------------------------------------------
Chief Engineer - USS SereniTREE.
http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com
Real Fans Wait - 09/30/05

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 3:31 AM

STATIC

You, sir, are USELESS!!!

==================================================
http://burstsofstatic.blogspot.com/

Evil, Lecherous Hump

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 6:04 AM

SIMONWHO

No wonder the Jedi's are going to lose in the new Star Wars film - over drinking.

Anyway, I've hopped out of the tub (for fear of the headline "SimonWho missing, giant pink raisin found in jacuzzi") and am in a big fluffy dressing gown, reading a lifestyle magazine and enjoying a smooth 15 year old whisky.

This is the life.

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 6:44 AM

JAKE7

Quote:
Originally posted by thatweirdgirl:
*Hewitt looks up, surprised but laughing. He grabs Jake7 and throws her on his back. He braces for the hit

*jake7, racing for the portal is uncermoniously grabbed by a Yeti and is flung on his(?) back for a game of Calvinball*

Gorrammit! I was close to getting out of here!

*Luckily, the Yeti is too busy dancing to realize jake7 has fallen off his back. Somehow, she lands on her feet in a crouching position. She looks around to see who else is still there and sees TRM with Needleseye by the mouth of the cave. TWG is happily dancing with the Yeti, and there appears to be a katana floating in mid-air. She does a double-take on that one.*

What the?

*Suddenly, she starts to make out some sort of shimmery form. Almost like shape made of water. She realizes it's ImEarly.*

This may come in handy later.

*she runs over to Needleseye and TRM.*

Hey, guys, we should get out of this cave before the Yeti become disenchanted with TWG.

*she calls out*

ImEarly, you'd better make your way over here! If we can't see you, we can't find you to get you out later!

TWG, you coming?

*jake7, TRM, Needleseye, and ImEarly run out the mouth of the cave. They find themselves at the top of a very large mountain.*

Well, TRM, got any energy left to get us back to the General?

--------------
MAL: Everybody's makin' a fuss.

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 12:23 PM

THEGREYJEDI

I'll 'ave you know I aren't a Jedi. Theyull call me "fallllllen." Too stiff, the buggers. Azz why I quit.

--------------------------------------------------------------
Chief Engineer - USS SereniTREE.
http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com
Real Fans Wait - 09/30/05

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 1:07 PM

We still need ti find FemaleReaver!

-Ratboy

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 1:22 PM

Do the hsustle!...

*twg sees that her companions are free from danger. They have exited the cave, but she remains*

Guys, I'm going to stay here a while with the Yetii. We're having fun...and it can't hurt to befriend giant snow creatures. I'll make it back okay. Maybe they'll help us find the FemaleReaver.

*Corbin runs up to her and smacks her head*
tag!

Aw, crap!

www.thatweirdgirl.com
---
Can we not revel in our cyber-love?

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 1:50 PM

Thanks for coming to my rescue, everybody!

* The Real Me stands by the mouth of the Yeti cave, tired, bruised, and battered, supported on each side by Jake7 and Needleseye. The presence of ImEarly is somewhere close by, but not distinct enough to detect with certainty. The Real Me looks up, and realizes that the term ‘cave’ is something of a misnomer, seeing as how the one-time cave seems to have lost its roof. He looks back. ThatWeirdGirl is still dancing playfully with the Yeti, starting a line dance, now. They are in her power, but how long can she keep it up? *

Hey! ThatWeirdGirl!

* The Real Me presumes that ThatWeirdGirl soon needs to return to Static. With his ebbing strength, The Real Me opens a dimensional portal back to the resort’s jacuzzi for her. He makes sure that it is too small to accommodate a Yeti’s massive frame. ThatWeirdGirl’s smile and wink tells him that she has seen. The Real Me returns his attention to his immediate companions. *

Back to the General Lee, Jake7? Well, it still needs repairs, doesn’t it? THERE is our transportation for the next leg of the quest, I think!

* The Real Me points to a Windmill Giant that has Rat perched upon its shoulder. The great creature is swaying in time to the music blaring out of Rat’s speakers. *

Uh, Rat? How are your batteries holding out on that thing?

The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 1:55 PM

* The Real Me decides that riding on the shoulders of a Windmill Giant is a lot like sailing in a ship. There is a gentle, rocking motion that constantly threatens to make one sea-sick. Then there is the constant blaring of music from “They Might Be Giants”, which is okay if you like that sort of thing… After all, they might NOT be giants…*

Okay, everybody, let’s talk about superpower etiquette. While you can really acquire any superpower you like here, please show some restraint. Really, Rat, shooting down a beam from the sun that could demolish mountain peaks? A little much, don’t you think? I mean, I always thought that Superman was the most boring superhero because he couldn’t really be hurt and he could beat anybody. Me, I liked the X-Men, each with their own more limited ability that worked best when combined with the powers of their teammates.

Aside from some rather fantastic inventions of mine, like Sparky, the butterfly thrusters, and the Spam-slingers, I’ve kept to dimensional portals and other space-folding abilities for quite a while, now. My powers are useful, but not particularly offensive in nature. But I’ve always had to find a way to solve problems using those abilities. I don’t suddenly acquire the ability to fire lasers out of my eyes, or fly, just because that is convenient for the storyline. And I don’t acquire the ability to simply zap our opponents into nothing, because that won’t help the storyline, either. There should be SOME level of struggle, SOME level of danger, or else we might as well be sipping wine in some jacuzzi, relaxing.

The most powerful superpower that we’ve witnessed to date, I think, is ThatWeirdGirl’s Confusion power, and she’s used that VERY sparingly. This was only the second time it has been unleashed at full power.

Rat, admittedly, weather forecasting isn’t very interesting. Some kind of weather control ability could be fun, and could make sense as an outgrowth of your original power. Just please tone it back a bit, please, or limit the number of your mega-shots.

* The Real Me looks around blankly, shrugs, and speaks loudly. *

ImEarly, if you have the power of invisibility, that could be useful and fun. Oh, and you should keep Bride1’s katana if you have the slightest idea how to wield it. That would make the best use of our resources, after all. Maybe when we encounter the FemaleReaver, you can sneak up behind her and stab her or something. You might try experimenting with your power, turning it on and off.

Needleseye, well, your shapeshifted monstrous form is certainly formidable, and your sonic attacks are devastating one-on-one, but not even you could take on ten Yeti. That’s sounds about right.

Jake7? I guess we haven’t found your superpower yet. Think about it, and see if something comes to mind. We might have to first expose you to radioactive coffee beans, or something. Or maybe you have force field powers from your gadget.

* The Real Me looks down near the Windmill Giant’s plodding feet. *

Look! A discarded jet pack! And human-sized footprints in the snow! We’re close now, and she’s on foot! Maybe in those caves up ahead!

* The Real Me listens. *

Say, does that sound like hundreds of Yeti chanting, to you?

The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 3:18 PM

Wow, there's a whole lotta stuff goin' on. Maybe I should help.

Or maybe I should make a snowman. Montana Girl, you feel up to it? I've got a pretty cool idea. And by cool I mean evil.

*Gets out of tub and puts on some pants, boots, a funky sweater, a peacoat and his ever trusty scally cap.*

I was thinking that first we should make a regular snowman. But creeping up behind him should be a big snake (I'm talking the basilisk in Harry Potter big). Every 15 feet or so along the snake should be more snowman, that the snake is slowly digesting. Whaddya think?

"Invader's blood marches through my veins like giant radioactive rubber pants. The pants command me! Do not ignore my veins!"

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 4:19 PM

Not long after realizing that he was invisible, and two feet of the floor before him was blasted by Rat, Jake7 yells over to him that he should make way from the cave. After running out of the cave, The Real Me, standing two inches from his ear, yells that he should experiment with this newly found power.

Well how the heck does he turn this off?

ImEarly poked and prodded about the hilt of the Katana, and felt three strange bulges toward the hand guard. He flipped the sword on its side and looked closely under the hand polished frame. The three bulges were clearly labeled with tiny characters of a strange other worldly language. Oh wait, it was Mandarin.
The First was, 無形 then, 未知數一個 and last, 未知數二. He pressed the first and The Real Me slapped him on the shoulder.

Welcome back. He said.

Apparently he was visible again.

He wondered what the other two buttons were capable of, but was afraid of the strange swords capabilities, he would experiment only if he was desperate.

Go sign my Guest Book,
http://www.geocities.com/thisbrownhouse
Then download Serenity,
http://homepage.mac.com/rocketplane/FileSharing8.html

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 6:00 PM

STATIC

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:

Okay, everybody, let’s talk about superpower etiquette. While you can really acquire any superpower you like here, please show some restraint.

By the way. . .and for the record, my superpowers are fairly innocuous. . .but it's where I get my flawless flying skill and my uncanny ability with both edged and projectile weapons.

==================================================
http://burstsofstatic.blogspot.com/

Evil, Lecherous Hump

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 6:02 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by CALLMEATH:
Or maybe I should make a snowman. ...
Whaddya think?

All right!

*Gets out of hot tub and puts on Carhartts, snow boots and gloves. Starts building normal snowman.*

Why don't you start on the snake? This will probably be good for scaring Yeti away too.

(What's really strange is that tomorrow we have a python coming in that hasn't eaten since September and we have to force feed him. So we are going to make a real snake have a food-sized lump in him. Just an odd coincidence.)

If you can be an idiot, I can be an idiot. - D'Argo

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 6:03 PM

THEGREYJEDI

Techpriest. General genius. Also really good with heavy blunt objects and absurdly powerful mecha.

--------------------------------------------------------------
Chief Engineer - USS SereniTREE.
http://www.jed-soft.com Gamer Rigs, Budget Prices
http://tomeofgrey.blogspot.com
Real Fans Wait - 09/30/05

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 6:11 PM

NEEDLESEYE

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
Needleseye...devastating one-on-one...

It's been said.

Keeper of Jayne's goggles. 8)
I caved.~ http://needleseyeland.blogspot.com/

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005 8:14 PM

I think I'll keep my superpower, thank you very much! But as far as useing it alot, that's not even an option! It requires far to much focus for everyday use, that and I'm....you know....lazy.

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
Uh, Rat? How are your batteries holding out on that thing?

I trust Duracell!!!

-Ratboy

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 2:14 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Rat:
It requires far to much focus for everyday use, that and I'm....you know....lazy.

I always know that I can depend on YOU, Rat!

The Real Me, First Officer of the Sereni-Tree

(The Real Me cannot currently receive messages from this site; he is not ignoring you. But he CAN receive e-mail at realme@pcibroadband.net.)

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 2:21 AM

SIMONWHO

Quote:
Originally posted by montanagirl:

(What's really strange is that tomorrow we have a python coming in that hasn't eaten since September and we have to force feed him. So we are going to make a real snake have a food-sized lump in him. Just an odd coincidence.)

Anyone in particular you're going to feed the snake with? And can they really go 7 months without food? I'm just thinking of all the supermodels who would love to survive that long without eating anything.

When I've finished my cigar, I'll come help you with the snowman, still a fair few puffs left.

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 2:46 AM

PSYCHICRIVER

Yay skiing. I got lost. Again. But I found you.

Skeee away mon petit-pois!

PsychicRiver
"Two by two, hands of blue."

"We can take care of each other. I'll knit!"

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 6:42 AM

JAKE7

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
Jake7? I guess we haven’t found your superpower yet. Think about it, and see if something comes to mind. We might have to first expose you to radioactive coffee beans, or something. Or maybe you have force field powers from your gadget.

I don't drink coffee, but if I'm just exposed to coffee beans (love the smell, love coffee flavored candy and ice cream, can't drink the stuff) maybe that will suffice?

I think my handy-dandy remote gadget is quite enough for now.

I figure that maybe later, under stress, something will manifest itself, but for now, the remote is it.

--------------
MAL: Everybody's makin' a fuss.

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 3:03 PM

COZEN

A wee hurricane sweeps across the Black Diamond Ski Resort, which, lest anyone has forgotten, is a Cozen Enterprises Inc. facility.

Borne upon the winds are 137,438,953,472,(2 to the 37th power, for those who care) tinyish specks. Upon closer inspection, the specks resolve themselves into something awfully close to a particularly nasty variant of African fire ants.

An anty representative sidles up to the microphone placed on the podium located next to the jacuzzi. The ant clears its thorax, and speaks.

"Ladies, gents, avatars and supranatural representations, if I may but for a moment have your attention, please."

*Pause*

"Thank you.

The cozen manifestation/star-cluster/thingy is pleased by the Sereni-Tree crew's lust for adventure and generally hedonistic pursuits. After all, given Earth-That-Soon-To-Be-Was's real life human committments, such escapism is understood to be manifest in a healthy ego-maintenance fashion.

However (and ain't there always a "but"), there remains the slight difficulty with a certain prosaic destruction of the Rukus asteroid. Sereni-Treeists may recall that said facility was blown apart by virtue of willful tampering with the asteroid's power source. There was no good reason to wreck the place. If y'all were bored, no one would have taken exception to the crew having boarded the Tree and leaving to pursue further galactic adventures.

In truth, cozen's wrath was mighty, such that s/he/thing considered obliterating Serenti-Tree and its occupants, likely via the simple expedient of mushing them into quantum string bits incorporated into the black hole at the center of the cluster.

ThatWeirdGirl saved yer collective arses. By recognizing the Yeti as soulful compatriots in this ol' 'verse, and calming their souls through dance (okay, it was the Hustle, but dance is the thing, eh), she has assuaged cozen's (perhaps irrational) wrath.

Still, the pleasure asteroid soaked up finite resources, so ya gotta pay. Somehow.

Ergo, me 'n the other 137,438,953,471 ants are gonna get ourselves into everywhere and everything you can imagine. We're talkin' belongings, equipment, food, orifices, all bits of precious."

***
dead parrot transmogrified.

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 3:40 PM

MALICIOUS

Hmmm. I do not recall signing a contract obligating us to pay for damages. Therefore, we cannot be held responsible. Sorry!

Mal-licious

I think I will add cursing and the hurling about of things to my repertoire.

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 3:45 PM

MALICIOUS

Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
The most powerful superpower that we’ve witnessed to date, I think, is ThatWeirdGirl’s Confusion power...

TRM, I do not believe you have factored in the chaos (or K.A.O.S.--shout out to agent 86) that I can create with my thread-jacking ability. Have you viewed this thread yet?

http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=9395&m=129945#129945

Or any of the Sanmi77 ones?

(Mal-Licious shakes her head sadly)

I guess I will not be appreciated during my lifetime...

Mal-licious

I think I will add cursing and the hurling about of things to my repertoire.

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 3:52 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by SimonWho:
Anyone in particular you're going to feed the snake with?

People who annoy me!

Quote:
And can they really go 7 months without food? I'm just thinking of all the supermodels who would love to survive that long without eating anything.

Yeah, they can go months without eating. (Although seven is a LONG time.) Unfortunately (or fortunately) the guy cancelled his appointment so we only did boring, normal things today.

*Continues building oblivious, contented snowman who, looking out across the landscape, fails to notice the giant maw of the snowsnake behind him.

Hears something in the background about ants and reparations, but doesn't catch what was actually said. Shrugs.*

I'm sure if it's something important someone will let me know.

*Hums off-key to herself.*

If you can be an idiot, I can be an idiot. - D'Argo

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 3:56 PM

COZEN

Quote:
Originally posted by Malicious:
Hmmm. I do not recall signing a contract obligating us to pay for damages. Therefore, we cannot be held responsible. Sorry!

Mal-licious

Suddenly, Mal-l become an anty-hill!

***
Ha!

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Wednesday, April 13, 2005 3:58 PM